Unexpected
by glittergirl20
Summary: Everything about Annie's life was unexpected the Hunger Games, her mental state, and falling in love with Finnick Odair. Annie and Finnick's love story the unexpected romance. Will go up to mockingjay all in Annie's point of view.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hello! I have been thinking about doing an Annie story ever since Chapter 100 in Finnick's Story (The year she first mentored.) With that being said I feel I should mention that Annie's story will not be related to Finnick's Story or Crazed (Which is basically the same story expect it give Dylan's background his experience in the mental hospital and his relationship with Tori. Annie will also be in the later chapters a lot because of the bond they have because the are both "crazy". I will stop selling you on this now lol) So this story is in a different universe (I guess that is the best way to describe it) from my other stories. It will have different arenas, different victors, and Finnick and Annie's relationship will be very different. (They will still fall in love and stuff. It can still be classified as a Finnie (This is the ship name me and my friends use cause they both have the double n thing going for them and it is hella cute) or the official one Odesta story. Most of you probably haven't read my other stories so you probably don't care but I thought I would mention it to the people who are reading my other stories.**

** Also I don't know how the updating will work for this one. I usually do a rotation for my stories because both of the ones I am working on aren't finished but I know how they will end. I usually figure out the ending before I start because I don't abandon stories. I hate when that happens and I update usually once a week (this one might be once every two weeks, I am on spring break right so it may be different) my stories are on the long side (as you can see from Finnick's Story 131 chapters and still no Katniss. I don't think I use lots of fillers but, I am bias.). So if I don't update in a while don't worry it will not be abandoned. Anyways on to the story!**

**Chapter One**.

I can feel the soft sea breeze against my skin. It smells like salt and sunlight. It always does in District 4 the home of fishing. Apparently before Panem this place was know as New England and fishing was important then as well. I guess things don't always change.

Usually I would love a nice calm day like this. The sun is shining, the water is nice and calm it is perfect. But today isn't a perfect day because it is the reaping for the 70th Hunger Games.

I'm seventeen so my name is in there more than some but I never had to take any tessare most people here don't. After all it is like that in all of the career Districts but 4 is different from 1 and 2. District 4 is mainly a career District because we have a great deal of money and we actually have people that volunteer. Most of the other Districts can't say that. Never the less we are seen as ruthless killers probably because in the arena we always have an alliance with 1 and 2.

"Annie!"

I turn around and see my friend Lana. She is wearing a soft pink dress and her sandy blonde hair is up in a perfect bun. The dress compliments her sun kissed skin.

"You ready for this Annie." She smiles.

"No." I shake my head.

"Well if your name does get called at least you will get to meet the great Finnick Odair." She teases

"Ah yes Finnick Odair." I say with disgust.

Lana and I both don't like him. We have never met him but all of District 4 and Panem know what he is like. Cocky, rude, arrogant, and a killer. He won the 65th Hunger Games when he was fourteen, he is the youngest victor ever. He uses this to his advantage so he can get all of the girls he wants. He never really needed it, girls were already dropping at his feet because of his good looks. He goes to the Capitol a lot and every time he goes he has a lady by his side or more than one lady in a visit.

That isn't why I hate him though. I hate him because he doesn't seem to care about his family at all. His parents died in a strange accident when he was seventeen. He didn't even bat an eyelash because the next day he went to the Capitol. He wasn't there for their funeral and he left his younger brother and sister by themselves. His brother was fifteen but his sister was only eleven. He shouldn't have left them alone but, he wanted to be with all of those admirers instead.

"The sad part about that is some people would probably love that." I say

"I'm sure he would find us fascinating. I don't think anyone has ever turned him down." Lana smiles

"He doesn't seem to care for the women here anyways."

"Just the Capitol freaks." she smiles

"We should probably get going don't want to be late."

"This is true." I don't want to know what would happen if you skipped the reaping. The peacekeepers here are not very threatening but I'm sure on this day they would have to follow orders.

I get checked in and Lana and I head to the seventeen section.

There are four chairs on the stage three for the victors and one for the mayor.

"Welcome everyone to the 70th Hunger Games!" Aries our escort beams

Aries is probably around thirty. He always has a whimsical outfit and strange hair and makeup to match.

This year his hair is a dark evergreen color and so are his eyes. He has tanned skin that looks fake. He is wearing a short sleeved v neck shirt that is black and embroidered with something green that look like real gemstones, he has strange blueish pants that also have the gem stones. He also has raven black tattoos on his chest that is the symbol of his name. Which is the symbol of the ram. What a stupid name.

"Before we get started let's introduce our victors."

First is an elderly woman named Mags. I think she won one of the earlier Hunger Games.

The second is Luna. She won the 60th Hunger Games. She has reddish brown hair and looks pale. She also has a scar on her face that starts at her her forehead and goes diagonally down to jaw line. She got that in the final fight of her Hunger Games. The boy from two did a number on her face but she was victorious and has the scar to prove it.

Last is Finnick Odair he smiles and waves at the camera. His sea green eyes and tan skin gleam in the sunlight and his perfect bronze locks blow in the wind.

He is so narcissistic. Probably the only thing he loves more than his admires is his reflection.

"Now let's get started shall we?" Aries says.

Aries shows a film that explains why we do this it's because people were fed up with being controlled so they fought for what they felt was right but, they lost so now every year 24 children from the ages of 12 trough 18 must be chosen to fight in the death in the Hunger Games.

"Now the real fun can begin as always ladies first." He smiles

He goes over to the glass bowl and reaches his hand in. He picks the first slip that touches his hand and goes back to the microphone.

I grab Lana's wrist and hold my breath.

"The female tribute repressing District 4 for the 70th Hunger Games is… Annie Cresta."

My whole body freezes and I don't know what to do. Lana looks at me and gives me a nudge. I walk to the stage woodenly and stand next to Aries.

I see myself on the screens. My face is as white as a sheet, my brown hair is flowing through the wind, and my blues eyes are filling up with tears.

Do not cry. I think to myself.

"So Miss. Cresta how does it feel to be this years tribute?"

Do not cry. I think to myself again. "I…" too late. Tears start pouring out o f my eyes.

"Very well." Aries says disappointed.

"Now onto the boys." He picks a paper and opens it quickly.

"Daniel Houl." He says and a boy from the eighteen section gets called out. He has sandy blonde hair, green eyes, and tanned skin like most of the population in 4.

"How does it feel Mr. Houl to be representing District 4 in the 70th Hunger Games."

"I can't wait for them to begin." He says and flashes a devilish smile.

"Very well now shake hands." He says

We do my hands are clammy because I'm so nervous.

We then get escorted to the Justice Building to say goodbye to our friends and families.

I sit down on the bench and hold my face in my hands and start crying.

"Annie." My mother says and runs towards me and hugs me.

"It's okay." She says and strokes my hair.

"No, it's not."

"Shhh just take it one day at a time sweets." She says and kisses my forehead.

"I love you mom." I say and hold her close.

"I love you too and whatever happens in that arena always remember that." She kisses me again and hold me for the rest of the time.

Next Lana comes in

"Annie." She says and hugs me.

"I guess the thing about Finnick Ofair isn't as funny." I laugh.

"No." She says and hugs me.

"Don't worry Annie you are smart and decent with knives and blow darts you have a decent shot."

"Do you think I can win."

"I think you have a shot." She tells me.

It isn't a yes but it's not a no either, so I will take it.

For the rest of the time I sit here in silence. I have calmed myself down. I feel I can face Dan and the mentors without crying.

Aries gets us and takes us to the train.

"These are your mentors Mags, Luna, and Finnick." He says as if they are the most important people in the world.

"Way to go." Finnick says looking at me.

"What?" I say looking confused.

"Tell me Annie do you want to die?"

"No."

"Then why did you cry up there?"

"Because I'm scared." I mumble.

"Well that is a reasonable response however, you can't show any emotion. I can guarantee people are already thinking the female tribute from 4 is weak. Sponsors don't like that so you would have trouble finding some."

"Like you would know." I mumble.

"What was that?" He says annoyed.

"You didn't need to work for anything you just got sponsors because you are good looking."

He looks hurt when I say this. I wonder if anyone ever disagrees with him.

"Well I am still a mentor and know how these things work. Besides the sponsors are not the only ones who will be thinking this, so will the tributes and the people from 1 and 2 won't like that and you are suppose to work with them. You might want to grow a back bone and learn to stop crying because it will only hurt you. Don't mess up again Annie." He says clearly annoyed

"How can you be so mean! What did I ever do to you!" I shout at him.

"I'm just being realistic. I'm not here to baby you that is what Luna and Mags are for. Stop throwing a pity party and accept that this what you have to deal with."

Something is off when he talks about dealing with this. His voice sounds sad. I don't know why that would be because he doesn't seem compassionate at all.

"I have accepted it." I spit back.

"Good." He says and walks to another train car.

"Woah." Dan says "Looks like you're on his bad side and I'm sure that's not a good thing."

"Whatever."I say.

I go to the dining car where the rest of them are. I sit down and eat the food. The whole time I notice Finnick is staring at me. His eyes don't hold rage they hold pity and sorrow.

Something about him is off. He says one thing but his body is projecting something else. I wonder what is going on inside that head of his.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

I toss and turn but can't sleep.I think it is the shock of it all or it could be the things Finnick said to me. He seems odd there is something about him that doesn't add up.

I get up and leave the room. One of the train attendants ask if I want anything ,I ask for tea. I usually drink tea when I can't sleep. It makes me tired or some reason.

There is a room off from this one and I can hear someone talking.

"It's okay Marci it was just a bad dream."

It's Finnick, his voice sounds so sweet and comforting. It is completely different from how he sounded earlier today. I wonder who he is talking to.

"Marci, Mom and Dad aren't coming back remember what we told you." He says sadly.

"There was an accident and they got hurt…" he trails off not knowing how to finish. He has pain in his voice I wonder how many times he has told her this. I'm assuming he his speaking with his sister. She is thirteen, she should understand the concept of life and death by now. Maybe she doesn't want to accept that her parents are dead or maybe her mind has locked away the memories because she doesn't want to deal with it.

"Marci put Michael back on the phone."

I think that is his younger brother.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to do this." He says defensively.

"I wish that too." He says annoyed

His voice is filled with regret and anger.

"I know but she will be okay. I'll probably call sometime tomorrow. It will be easier before the Capitol madness starts."

"I know." He says angrily.

"Dammit Michael. I don't want this. How many times are we going to have this conversation."

"Just take care of her." He says sadly.

"Fine." He says and slams down the phone.

I wonder why he got angry so quickly.

He gets out of the room and the attendant comes with my tea.

"Here you are Miss."

"Thanks." I say

Finnick walks over and has a sly smile I don't think he knows I heard him.

"Why are you up Cresta." He says and sits next to me.

"I couldn't sleep."

"Neither can I." He says he is right next to me but he sounds like he is a million miles away.

"Why is that?" I ask

"Lots of reasons."

I nod.

"You good at anything?" He says

"What?" I say confused

"For the Huger Games." He smirks

"Oh, well… people tell me I am handy with knife."

"You don't sound too sure." He smiles at me.

"Well…"

"Confidence is key Annie. It's all about acting, it's all about the way you want to present yourself. Being good at killing is just half of it."

"So…what? I'm suppose to act like a ruthless killer but when I get in the arena run and hide."

"I've heard of worse ideas." He tells me.

"Well you don't really need an act now do you Finnick?"

"No I guess not." He says. It's suppose to sound cocky but his face is telling a different story. It is filled with remorse.

"Why do you do that?" I ask him.

"Do what?" He asks confused

"Say something snarky but then look sad."

He smiles but it doesn't reach his eyes.

"You notice things that's something and you're very perceptive." He says

He gets up and starts to walk away.

"You should get some sleep." He says not bothering to turn around.

"Wait."

He stops and turns around.

"Yes." He says

"You didn't answer my question."

"I know." He says smugly. He turns back around and heads to his room.

I sigh.

"Complex fellow." I say aloud. He left the room but I swear I can hear him chuckle.

* * *

I roll off the bed onto the floor.

"Ouch." I say and pick myself up and head to the shower.

I get in the bathroom and the shower has lots of buttons. I'm just used to turning a knob but this is beyond my knowledge I just press random buttons. I look around for soap but don't see any. I learn why, a couple of minutes later it is spurting from the walls. It smells like water lilies. I dry off, get dressed, and french braid my hair.

I head to the dining car when I get in there it is only Mags and Aries.

"Good morning Annie don't you look marvelous." Aries says

"Um thanks."

"How did you sleep?" Mags asks me.

"Fine I think. We get to the Capitol today correct?"

"Yes that's correct but first we get to watch the recaps." Aries says.

"Do you have any questions?" Mags asks

"Yes… what's it like?"

"The Capitol?"

I nod.

"It's like waking up in an animated dream. It all seems not real." She says

I nod. They start to bring out breakfast and the others come in. They pour some coffee into our mugs. I've never had coffee. Not because it's a luxury but because my mother hates it. I take a sip and scrunch my face…it is so bitter.

Finnick smiles and opens the jar next to him.

"Want a sugar cube?" He says sounding seductive.

I smile and can feel myself blushing. I don't know why, I don't like him like that.

"I'll pass." I say trying to get a hold of myself.

He shrugs and plops three into his mug.

"Alright, after breakfast they will show the recaps. You should try and pay attention. As Finnick so kindly pointed out to Annie yesterday usually the tributes from 4 work with the tributes from 1 and 2 but, you don't have to do that." Luna says.

"It would be wise to though." Finnick says

"Why won't they just kill us?" Dan asks.

"Let's put it this way would you rather face them alone?" Finnick says.

"But if it is all of us at the end we can't kill them." I say.

"Speak for yourself." Dan says.

"Fine, _I_ can't kill them."

"That's why you run away before that happens." Finnick says.

"But…"

"It's starting!" Aries shouts.

We take our plates and sit in front of the tv.

I know Luna told me to pay attention but I don't want to. I will see all of them in the Capitol anyways, right now all I'm focusing on is eating my breakfast.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

The train is starting to slow into the station.

"Alright everyone this is the first time they will be seeing you in person! Make a good impression smile, wave, and have excellent posture!" Aries shouts with glee.

He is looking ridiculous. He has the same dark green hair that is styled so it looks like spikes in his hair, he also has interesting makeup on his face. His eyes have a silvery glitter eye shadow with dark black eyeliner. On his cheeks he has blue streaks that swirl around his face as if he was a painting. His green eyebrows seemed to be pierced and it looks like they have little horns. He is wearing just plain clothes though jeans and a dark blue v-neck top which gives you a good view of his chest tattoo. I think he always wears v-neck shirts for that reason. He looks like someone from a strange land or as Mags told me something from an animated dream.

When we leave the train station there are people who look as equally ridiculous as him. They are all the colors of the rainbow they look like nothing you have ever seen. Everything is like a very animated dream, the buildings are all very abstract some are bright colors like blues or pinks but other are the standard silver and brick building.

"Alright everyone this is where you will be made up so you can get up to Capitol standards." Aries beams.

"Because we are just slumming it in District 4." I joke.

I can see Finnick smiling and holding in a laugh.

"Exactly." Aries says completely oblivious. If he was an escort for a different District I think he would be laughing too.

"Alright, you wait here while I try to find your prep team." He says and scurries off.

"Is he always this out of touch with reality?" I ask him.

"He is tame compared to most of the citizens here believe me I-

"Finnick!" A woman cuts him off and starts to skip over here.

She has big blue eyes, pale skin, and blonde hair. Her hair is chin length and is up in two small pigtails tied with big ribbons that flow to her waist. She is wearing an interesting pink cut out dress.

"Hello Komari." Finnick smiles at her.

"I am so excited to see you. I have been waiting for you to come back so you could spend time with me."

"Well, I am here now just for you." He says in a voice that is so sincere I almost believe him.

"Oh Finnick don't lie." She says flirtatiously.

She looks to me.

"Is this your tribute?"

"The female one yes." He says.

"Oh she is so cute! You're so cute! I can't wait to see you in the arena! I always love your tributes Finnick! I just love them! What was your name again?"

I can't even answer her question because she is talking so quickly. It's like she is on something, I won't rule it out, who knows what happens in the Capitol.

"I think I will sponsor you! Oh you're so cute stop being so cute! I wonder how they will make you look even cuter, that hair those eyes!" She pinches my cheek. I think you've got a winner Finnick."She smiles.

"I think so too." He says with his eyes in a dead lock with mine. I think he actually means it, which I find strange because I can't really do anything.

"I'm so sorry cute one but, I am taking Finnick away from you we have plans." She smiles to me. "Isn't that right Finnick."

"Whatever you wish Komari." He smiles "But before we go I have to consult with the other mentors."

She smiles at me and twirls her ribbons. Finnick is talking with Mags and Luna he comes back in a few minutes.

"I will see you later Annie." He tells me. He looks at the girl and holds out his hand "Lead the way Miss Komari." He says seductively.

"Of course." She takes his hand and drags him from the room.

I look at Mags and Luna I expect them to look angry but, they don't. They look sad and I'm surprised because he is leaving to go have fun. I'm not disappointed, I had anticipated this, after all it is what he is known for.

Aries comes back.

"Alright, Annie Dan follow me!"

He takes us down a hallway and stops when there are rooms with 4's on them.

"The one to the left is Dan's so that means Annie yours is the one on the right. Now go in so they can make you look like stars!" He says and practically pushes us into our rooms.

When I enter there are two people in here a man and a woman. They both look to be thirty and not as strange as the people I saw in the crowd. The man has purple hair and the woman's hair is a royal blue.

"Come here." The woman instructs.

I do.

"You are very fair. Yule will like that."

"Who's that?"

"Your stylist sweetie. We just make you look picture perfect, he approves everything. Right now he is putting the finishing touches on your outfit." The man says.

The man and woman's personalities are polar opposites from one another. The woman is cold and harsh and the man is warm and inviting.

"I'm Dean and that pile of joy is Diana." The man says.

"Annie."

"We know." Diana says annoyed

"I was just..."

"No talking we are working."

Dean smiles and mouths 'sorry.'

I smile back at him.

They shower me down and spray me with this sticky sweet stuff. The smell is so fake it is making me dizzy. They then work on my face and pluck my eyebrows when they are finished they have over plucked them and I looked surprised, I wonder if this is a Capitol thing. Now they start smearing makeup on my face. Diana is grabbing a decent amount of something.

"Ah, ah Diana." Dean says in a scolding tone and wagging his finger. "Remember what Yule said not a lot. He only wants to enhance her natural features." Dean scolds.

Diana sighs "But I think..."

"Your not the boss." He smiles.

They put on toner, bronzer, blush, shimmery eye shadow, eyeliner, and fake eyelashes. They brush out my hair and curl it so my hair is in soft curls that frame my face. They also spray something in it that gives it a blue tint with glitter.

"There you look ready." Dean says.

"I still think more would've been better." Diana says.

"I think she looks perfect." Dean says.

Diana sighs and leaves the room.

"Yule will be in here shortly." Dean says and follows Diana.

I look at my reflection. I don't look very different, which I like. Most of the time people are covered in makeup and you can't see what they really look like until they are in the arena. I'm glad this Yule person isn't making me look like an idiot.

I think my hair looks strange the blue and glitter highlights are abnormal. I'm assuming the people in the Capitol people will love it though.

I hear the door open.

"Hello Annie."

I turn around and see a man who looks to be in his late forties or early fifties. He looks normal excepted for the makeup on his eyes.

"Hi." I say

"I'm Yule, you're stylist. Do you like this look I have prepared."

"It's great I would be fine with whatever though." I smile.

He smiles.

"Good I like the flexible tributes. This is what you will be wearing."

He hands me an outfit bag and I open it.

"Oh." I say.

"Get dressed I think you need to be heading to your chariot soon."

It has shiny black shoes, long white socks that go up to my knees, and a very short dress. So short that it is goes up almost all the way to my hips it is leaving nothing to the imagination. It resembles a sailor suit. It is navy blue and sleeveless, it has a scoop neck and some of the fabric is white and blue striped. The rest is navy blue and there is a bow on my chest and it has buttons six gold buttons on my torso. It is complet with a white sailor hat that has an anchor on the front.

I put it on and feel like a pin up girl. I don't like it, I feel awkward and uncomfortable.

I get escorted by Aries to the chariots.

"What should we be doing?" Dan asks Luna and Mags. Finnick must be goofing around with Komari still.

I look at his outfit it is similar but, his outfit is more conservative. I wish mine was like that.

"Smile and wave, just look confident that's all you really can do at this stage." Mags tells us.

I nod.

_Tributes to your chariots _An announcer says.

Dan and I step up and a few seconds later we get wheeled out to the square. I can see a bunch of strange people but they all blur together quickly that it looks like a rainbow. The chariots stop and we are in the square and for President Snow to make his speech he makes his opening remarks and then we are wheeled back inside.

"How was that?" I ask Mags.

"You both did well. We should head upstairs now." Mags says.

We all head into the elevator and Aries presses the 4 button.

"Your room is on the same floor as you District number in case you ever forget." He tells me.

I nod not really caring. I think someone will always be ushering us back to our rooms anyways.

The elevator dings and I walk out it is amazing. It is brightly colored has a large sofa that could easily seat twelve, chandlers that are sparkling, and a dining room with a table that seems to go on forever.

"This place is nice." I say.

"If you think this is nice Annie you should see District 12's floor they get the biggest suite in the place." Aries smiles.

I see Finnick sitting on the sofa in the common room his facing is holding an emotion that I am not familiar with.

"Oh good Finnick you're back in time for dinner." Aries says.

"I'm always here for dinner." He says.

"Yes you are, I like that because I'm sure you have better offers." Aries tells him. I can tell by Finnick's body language that he doesn't like this comment because he looks sick.

"I would rather be here." He says.

He walks over to us.

"You look nice." He tells me sarcastically.

"I feel ridiculous."

"That usually means the Capitol citizens love it."

I nod.

"Well apparently _I'm so cute_." I mock Komari from earlier.

He smiles.

"Komari did like you, she already gave you some money." He tells me.

"So that's what you did spent all that time talking about me." I say sarcastically.

"No." He says and shakes his head.

"Well, you did have so much in common." I say sarcastically.

He doesn't say anything to this comment, I think I offended him somehow. I think Finnick needs an instruction manual everything he does is a puzzle to me.

"You both should shower before dinner." He says and walks off.

"Good idea Finnick, I will show them to their rooms." Aries says. He takes Dan and myself down a hallway.

"This is yours Annie and Dan's yours is across the hall. Dinner will be in an hour so shower up and come out when you are done." Aries says and goes back to the common room.

I get into the room and am surprised by how big it is because it looks like it will be small from the outside. There are two dressers, a giant bed, two bed side tables that have lamps, and a giant window that gives a good view of the Capitol. It is all made up of luxurious materials marble, crystal, gems. It is the most outlandish thing I've seen in my life. I know I will be saying that for the rest of the week... possibly the last week of my life.

I sigh and head to the bathroom. It is covered in marble tiles. It has a big shower that looks like it has facets coming from every wall and here is a futuristic like sink and toilet. It is all chrome which makes it look very tacky.

I get in the shower. There are many buttons just like on the train. I punch some of them and water starts to pour from every wall, and it is steaming hot. I don't know how to turn it down so I just deal with. I notice there is no soap but just like on the train it comes out of the walls in a few minutes and it smells like peaches.

I get dressed and flop down on the bed before going out for dinner. I just want some alone time, actually I think I want to avoid everything. I still don't want to accept that I might have to kill someone in a few days or worse... be dead in a few days.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"Knock, knock! Rise and shine Annie you need to be in the training center in thirty minutes." A chipper Aries says. I wonder if he ever sounds sad.

I see an outfit bag on the dresser. I open it up and see black track pants with a white strip running down the side and the shirt is blue and back. The shirt has fours on the front and back of the shirt. Probably to tell what district I am from, I get dressed and head outside.

I see Mags, Luna, Aries, and Dan but, Finnick is no where in sight. I wonder where he is. I sit down at the table and see the breakfast they have put out. It has everything you could image. I go for a light breakfast because I am going to be doing something athletic soon. I just take oatmeal, a banana, and orange juice.

"Is there anything in particular we should do?" I ask.

"I think the survival station is key." Mags says

I nod.

"Learning how to use a weapon is also important. You should make friends, you already have an in with the tributes from 1 and 2. If you don't like them try and find someone else to work with." Luna says

"Don't show off too much, you don't want them to know everything." Mags says.

"Okay." I say.

"I have a question." Dan says

"Go on." Mags says

"Where's our other mentor?" He asks

"He is probably having some fun with that blonde girl from yesterday." Aries says.

"So he gets to have fun while we are in the fight of our lives." He says clearly annoyed.

"Oh don't worry come game time he will be helping you." Aries smiles "He is a very good mentor."

"Then where is he?" Dan asks again.

"Probably getting some." I mutter.

This causes Dan to laugh but everyone Luna and Mags look a tad angry.

"We should head down now." Aries says.

We get in the elevator and Aries presses the _GF _button. Once we leave the elevator he takes us down a hallway that turns into a gym. The gym has lots of different stations. I can see a weapon station where there is almost ever weapon imaginable axe, mace, bow and arrows, an assortment of knives, and tridents. Tridents weren't offered until Finnick got one in the arena from a sponsor ever since then they have been there. Usually only people from 4 use them but, they aren't as good as him. I can also see the survival stations where you can practice camouflage, fire starting, and plant identification. There is one more station that has to do with tying knots but, I don't need to know how to do that.

We get instructed to stand in a circle from District order. I look around the room and see the other twenty-two people. The people from one and two are very big and strong. I didn't pay attention during the recaps but, I'm assuming they all volunteered. I can't remember the last time someone from one and two didn't volunteer.

The boy from one has ash blonde hair and pale blue eyes, the girl from one has fire red hair and green eyes and a sneer on her face. The boy from two has brown hair and brown eyes, and the girl from 2 has black hair with a blue tint and green eyes.

I try not to look at the other tributes because I don't want to know what they look like because I may have to kill them in a few days.

A woman with hair that is gleaming like gold and skin that is the color of coffee comes in to go over the rules.

"Hello tributes and welcome to the training stage. I am here to go over the rules of regulations of this stage, you are not allowed to attack one another that is strictly for the arena. I would also suggest you visit survival stations many tributes believe that you don't need to go there and it is not as important as learning how to welid a weapon but, if you wish to become a victor you have a greater chance if your skill set is well rounded. You are now free to start your training remember the gamemakers will be watching." She motions to a loft where the gamemakers are watching us intently and then walks away.

"Do you want to stay together?" Dan asks me.

"I think if we split up we could cover more ground." I tell him. It's mostly because I don't want to get too close to him.

I head to the weapon section like everyone else, most people are going for the heavier weapons. I see the bow and arrow station is open. I am alright with this we learned archery in gym class. I wouldn't say I'm good but I can hit the target after a few times, I wouldn't make it my weapon of choice but, getting better at it won't hurt.

"Hello, first I want to see what you have got." The male instructor says. They have three bows I pick the one that is closest to what they have in gym class. I grab an arrow and load the bow. I squint my eyes to get a good look at the target. The target looks like a human and has spots that will make a direct kill.

I breathe in and back out then release the arrow. It hits the target but, it isn't a direct hit they would still be alive but probably injured.

"Not, bad. It wasn't a fatal hit but they would bleed out within forty minutes. Why don't you try this." He shows me how to get a direct hit just like our gym teacher did but, I still can't get a fatal hit every time.

"Why don't you try this Cresta." I hear a boy say and stand behind me. He is holding my waist and places the arrow a bit higher and it gets a hit right thorough the heart.

The person backs away and I see it is the male from 1.

"Um t-thanks." I say awkwardly.

"You're pretty good. I loved the strategy as acting like a weakling, I almost believed it. But, after seeing how good you are at this well... you have a chance in the arena." He smiles

"Yeah well you caught me." I laugh.

"The name is Bruno and I look forward to working with you in the there." He winks at me and walks off and shiver runs down my spine.

I head to the knife station which Lana says I am good at. I am about as good with this as I am with archery. I can make a fatal hit some of the time but, it is never a guarantee. Doing this is flustering me so I head to the survival station. I learn all about plants and I manage to start a fire. At least I am good at survival skills but, I do need to know how to work a weapon.

A bell rings and it's time for lunch Dan meets up with me when get in line a get lunch it's a ham and cheese sandwich, a apple, and a glass of milk. I'm surprised by how normal this I was expecting some luxury Capitol dish looks like they know how to keep things simple as well.

Dan and I sit at a table and the other careers soon follow. a

"Hey Cresta time for you to meet the rest of the crew." Bruno tells me.

"Fizzle." The girl from 1 says maybe she got her name from her red hair.

"Stevie." The girl from two says with a sneer.

"Wick." The boy from two says.

"Annie." I say.

"We say you at the weapon stations your pretty good." Wick says.

"Pretty good." Fizzle says.

"She's as good as you Fizzle." Bruno says.

Fizzle snarls at him for this. We end up sitting in silence for the rest of the time. After lunch I go back to the weapon station and study throwing the instructor uses an axe he starts talking about decapitation. I move on I don't want to hear about this or see it. Fizzle seems to love this, I don't want to work with her or anyone else but Finnick said it would be better to be with them than go against them alone and I agree with him. Another bell rings signaling that training is now over.

Aries is out there and so are the rest of the escorts. They all look as strange as he does.

"So how did it go? Did you make District 4 proud?" He asks.

"I think so." Dan says.

"Same."

We get in the elevator and I press the four button and we get taken up to our room. When the doors open we see Finnick making out with a brunette woman. It is not the same one as yesterday he really does jump from woman to woman. Finnick breaks the kiss.

"My tributes are back love." He says out of breath.

"Will you call me tomorrow?" She asks.

"We'll see." He says as if he is the most important person in the world. I can tell he isn't going to call her but, she will be waiting by the phone hoping Finnick Odair will call her.

"Bye Finnick." She smiles and giggles as the elevator doors close

He waves and blows her a kiss but when the elevator doors close his face holds relief.

"So how did training go?" He asks us.

"It went fine." Dan says angrily and walks off.

"What's with him? He asks me

"Finnick come on." I tell him.

"What?"

"Good god, really." I smile at him in disbelief.

"What?" He says again confused.

"A tribute has never gotten mad at you because you are fooling around instead of giving us advice."

"You weren't here anyways." He says annoyed.

"Oh my god." I say in disbelief and walk away.

"Annie wait." He says and grabs my wrist.

"Yes?" I say annoyed.

"I wanted to be here and I think you have a shot at wining this but…

"Being with your girlfriends are more important."

"Annie." He says and he looks like a hurt puppy.

"Don't look sad. You have a choice and you are making the wrong ones." I take my hand from his wrist and walk to the common room as I'm waking I can hear him whisper 'no I don't'. I don't care what he means by this statement. You always have a choice and he is making the wrong ones. I sit in the common room.

Luna, Mags, and Dan are out here. I have no idea where Aries went and I don't really care.

"So how did training go?" Luna asks.

"Good. We got in with one and two like _Finnick_ suggested but we really didn't need to work for it."

Finnick comes into the room and sits next to Mags. He is looking at his hands probably avoiding our gazes.

"What about you Annie."

"It was alright I'm good at survival skills but, wasn't the best at weaponry. I can hit the target but not all of the time."

"Well, maybe if you practice more tomorrow it will be better." Luna says.

"At least I can make a kill shot most of the time. I can usually hit them so I could slow them down." I say

"That's the spirit." Finnick says with a smile.

I roll my eyes because I'm annoyed with him.

"Dinner is ready!" Aries says and comes out from wherever he was hiding.

We eat dinner and then I head to my room I'm about to go to sleep but, I hear a knocking on my door. I'm assuming it is Aries telling me something important about tomorrow but when I open the door it isn't Aries. It's Finnick.

"What do you want." I ask him slightly annoyed.

"I um... can I come in."

I look at him strangely

"I don't want that." He says.

"I didn't think that's why you stopped by. Do you do that with the other tributes?"

"No." He shakes his head and walks into my room and sits on the bed.

"Then why are you here?" I ask.

"There's a reason why I leave Annie."

"I know why you leave it's because you're shallow."

"That's not what I meant."

"Then pray tell why do you leave?"

"Because I have to."

"Finnick you don't have to do anything."

"Yes... I do."

"We can go around in circles all night Finnick. I really don't care what your reasons are for leaving because I am too busy worrying about dying." I say

"You're not going to die."

"Were you not listening to me when I said I wasn't very good in the training center."

"You said you could hit the target every time but, can't make a fatal hit that is more than most tributes can say." He tells me.

"I guess but, in order to win this thing you have to kill people you should know that." I look him up and down. He did kill eight people without hesitation.

"Well, yes but you can win. You notice things which is important."

"I guess."

"You have to believe it though Annie."

"Why? Why do you want me to win so badly?"

"Because you are too good to die." He tells me.

"I can't argue with you there."

He smiles and this time it reaches his eyes.

"I bet you say this to all of your tributes though."

"Well some of them volunteer and others... you're just different." He says.

There's an awkward silence.

"I think I should go to sleep I have to train tomorrow and you..."

"Goodnight Annie." He tells me and walks away.

I lay back on the bed. Why do I get the feeling that Finnick isn't the shallow person he wants everyone to believe. And why does he think I can win so badly. I wish I had his instruction manual. I can't focus on him, I just need to focus on tomorrow. I need to focus on getting better at using weapons.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

I toss and turn but, I can't find a comfortable position. I don't need a wake up call today because I can't fall asleep I just keep thinking I am going to die. It is six thirty in the morning and I have to be awake at nine. I figure I can just chill in the common room, no one should bother me. I start walking out there and I can hear someone talking. I wonder who else is up at six in the morning. After a minute I realize it is Finnick and he sounds angry.

"Fine!" He slams down the phone. I'm debating if I should go back to my room or go out and talk with him.

"I know you're there." He says aloud. He could be talking to anyone. "I know you were there that night on the train too." Now I know he is talking to me. I come out from the hallway.

"Hi." I say sheepishly.

"What are you doing up so early?" He asks me.

"I couldn't sleep nervous and stuff... wait why are you up so early?"

"I have my reasons." He says with his cocky smile.

He looks disheveled his hair is all messy and his clothes are all torn up. He looks sad and I think he was crying.

"You look terrible." I tell him.

He smiles

"Well, thank you Miss. Cresta I haven't heard that in awhile." He sounds genuinely happy that I just insulted him.

"You're a strange person." I tell him and sit next to him.

"Haven't heard that in awhile either." He smiles.

"Who was that on the phone?" I ask him.

His face hardens.

"Someone."

I roll my eyes.

"Are you okay?" I ask him

He looks at me strangely

"Why are you asking me this?"

"Like I said you look terrible." I smile.

"I can't remember the last time someone asked me that." He says sadly

"If you're okay?" I ask confused.

"Yes, people don't ask me questions like that they are too self absorbed."

I smirk

"Maybe, that says something about your character."

"You have no idea Annie." He looks at me. His green eyes contain sadness in them.

"I don't get it." I say abruptly.

"Don't get what?" He says confused.

"Why they all love you."

"Because I'm gorgeous." He says in a ridiculous tone.

"No you're not." I say.

He sits up and looks at me strangely.

"You're saying you don't want this." He motions to himself.

"No because you're too in love with yourself. There would be no room for me it would be all about you." I tease

He looks very happy when I say this

"Annie Cresta you are a strange person in the best possible way."

"I ermm thank you."

"Your welcome. So why are you awake? Training day number two and the evaluations are tomorrow."

"Gee maybe it's because I keep thinking I'm going to die." I say sadly.

"Well, if it makes you feel any better all the other tributes are probably thinking the same thing."

"So sincere." I tease.

"Annie, you'll be fine."

"You shouldn't make promises you can't keep." I tell him.

He looks at me strangely.

"Fine you're going to die then."

"Finnick." I say and shove his shoulder.

"What? I can keep that promise and do you want to know why?"

"What are you going to let me die in the arena."

"No, because when you win I can just kill you."

I roll my eyes.

"Add more red to your ledger?"

"Oh yes." He says sarcastically "But, seriously Annie I have a really good feeling about you."

"You keep saying that... I want to know why."

"You're different."

"You mean I can't do much."

"No, it's just hard to explain." He smiles at me.

"You're not falling for me are you." I tease.

He looks at me and has a strange expression on his face.

"Finnick relax I was kidding."

"I know." He says.

"You're not the person everyone thinks you are." I say.

"I am a man of many surprises." He teases.

"I'm serious Finnick... there's stuff about you that doesn't make sense."

"Like what?" He says confused.

"You yell at me for being weak but, then look at me like you want to say sorry. You looked relieved when that brunette idiot left, and you looked sad when you had to go with the blonde one. You're a fake but, I don't understand why."

"You should go to sleep." He says abruptly.

"But...

"You have those evaluations... and you need to sleep." He says awkwardly. He gets up and walks to his room.

I'm in the common room alone and confused. The person I was talking to wasn't the great Finnick Odair who is loved by the Capitol. I think the person I was talking to was the real Finnick... the one he doesn't want other people to see.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

I start to hear a clattering noise and bolt up. I see it is the Avox's getting breakfast ready They are the only people out here. I ended up staying out on the sofa because I didn't feel like going back to my room.

A few minutes later I see Finnick and he is racing to the elevator.

"Hi Finnick." I say.

He jumps at my voice.

"Jesus Annie."He tells me.

"You look less terrible." I smile.

It looks like he had a goods night sleep and he doesn't look as sad.

"Thanks. Good luck for today I have to be leaving." He says in a rush.

"Where are you going at eight thirty in the morning?"

"I have to see someone."

"Miss. Komari? or the mystery brunette?" I tease

"Neither." He tells me.

I nod and smile.

"Well, have fun with whoever or whatever you are doing."

He smirks and walks over here and sits next to me. He takes my hand and looks at me and leans in as if he is going to kiss me.

I look at him strangely.

"Now, don't get jealous Annie I will be back to see your score and then I am all yours." He whispers in my ear.

I smile and can feel my cheeks blushing.

He leans back and looks at me smiling.

"Now wasn't that fun." He says and smiles.

"What do you mean?" I say confused.

"You are a liar Annie you said that you didn't want me."

I roll my eyes.

"That doesn't prove anything if you act all seductive anyone will smile and blush."

"Oh really?" He says amused.

To make my point I lean in like I'm going to kiss him and put my hand on his cheek. He feels warm and smells like sea salt.

"Yes really, and you should know that I'm not yours, and I won't be waiting because I don't want you Finnick Odair." I whisper seductively.

Now I back away and he is smiling and looks a little uncomfortable just like I did.

"Now wasn't that fun." I say in a mocking tone.

He is still smiling and it looks like he wants to say something but, the the clock chimes and his facial expression does a three sixty.

"Like I said I have to be going." He says.

"Have fun." I say.

"Don't worry I won't." He says sarcastically but, I can tell he is sad. I don't question it this time that is probably just how he is.

After a few minutes Aries and Luna come out.

"Hello Annie you are up early. Are you excited to show the gamemakers what you got?"

"Yes." I say.

"That may be the case but, you should get into your training outfit." Luna says with disapproval.

I nod and head back to my room. I take a quick shower and put on my training clothes then I head back to the common room. Everyone is out there now and it looks like I am late. I head to the kitchen table and start picking at the food.

"So what should we be doing in the training center today?" I ask.

"You said you wanted to train with weapons more would you should do that." Luna says annoyed. I get the feeling she volunteered because she isn't very nice.

"What should we show the gamemakers?" Dan asks.

"Show them what you think you are best at. You already have sponsors because you are from District 4 just try and do your best." Mags smiles at us.

"Besides Finnick is getting some for you now." Luna snarls.

"Well at least he is good for something." Dan says.

"So it would seem." Luna says.

I have a feeling that Finnick isn't actually doing that but, I'm not going to question it.

"Alright time to go!" Aries chirps.

"Good luck." Mags says to both of us.

We head down to the elevator and I do head to the weapon stations and I'm just as good as I was yesterday but, I see some of the other tributes and Finnick was right. I can do more than most, I couldn't beat the careers in a weapon match though.

"Time for individual evaluations." The woman from the first day says and ushers us into a room.

"This is the time to show the gamemakers what you have learned. You have fifteen minutes and make them count because these affect your chance at getting sponsors." She says and leaves the room.

We sit and I stare at my feet, waiting is agony. I can't image what the people from twelve go through especially since the gamemakers have probably lost interest by then.

_District 4 Annie Cresta. _A voice says from the ceiling.

I walk woodenly to the training center.

"Female tribute for District 4, Annie Cresta." The woman says.

"Miss. Cresta your fifteen minutes begins now." The head gamemaker says.

I breathe in and out to calm myself. I head to the archery and knife stations. I make some kill shots and stop in case I miss, it will look like I am better than I acutally am. I head to the knot tying station and make a few hangman knots and hang the dummies.

"Times is Miss. Cresta you are free to leave." The head gamemaker says again.

I smile and walk out of the room relieved

I head to the elevator and hit the four button. When I get to our floor I see everyone is here but Finnick.

Before I can say anything Aries runs up to me.

"How did it go Annie? What did you show them? Do you think you impressed them? Oh Annie if you mess this up it will affect your sponsors." Aries shouts with excitement.

"I showed them some of my weapon skills and hung some of the dummies. I think they liked me but it was hard to tell." I say.

"It sounds like you did fine Annie." Mags tells me.

"What did you show them Dan?" I ask

"Same stuff really." He says unamused.

"Why don't you two shower up so you are nice and fresh when the scores start." Aries says

We both do as we are instructed. The water droplets hitting me feels nice, it is calming which is good because I'm nervous about the score I received. I head out and see everyone but Finnick on the couch. Looks like he won't be coming back to see our scores.

"Perfect Annie they are about to start." Aries says.

I sit down on the sofa and the screen flickers on after a few minutes.

"Hello and welcome to the reveal of the training scores for the 70th Huger Games!" Caesar Flickermen shouts with joy. He has neon yellow hair this year and I think it looks terrible.

District one and two both receive tens. The female tribute from three receives a six and the male tribute receives a seven.

"Now District 4." Caesar says. I can hear the elevator ding and can see Finnick walking over here, he sits next to me.

"Cutting it a little close." I mutter.

He stifles a laugh which causes Luna to glare at us.

"Daniel Houl receives the score of ten."

"Good job." Aries tells him.

"Annie Cresta receives the score of." I hold my breath ."nine." I sigh in relieve

"Good job Cresta." Finnick smiles at me. "We can work with that."

"Let's celebrate over dinner then to is straight to bed." Aries says

Aries blabs on about how proud he is of us. I should be happy because I got a good score but, I'm nervous because in a day I will be in the arena fighting for my life.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"Miss. Cresa how does it feel to be the female tribute for District 4 for the 70th Hunger Games?" Finnick impersonates Caesar Flickermen.

"Um... good I guess."

Finnick rolls his eyes.

"Don't do that."He says

"Do what?" I ask confused.

"That weak stuff." He smiles.

"I'm sorry I'm not good with this impromptu stuff." I say annoyed.

"That is why we are doing these practice question."

"I see."

"They will probably ask about me as well." He smiles.

"Someone has an ego." I say nonchalantly because it is what he is known for.

"He does it every year with the female tribute."

"Oh, does he want to know if Finnick Odair stole my heart." I mock

"Something like that." He says.

"Well he shouldn't, word around the street is you only go for the Capitol girls." I smile.

"That's true I guess." He says. It sounds like there is a double meaning to this but, I don't care. I can't waste anymore time trying to figure out his puzzles I am just going to stay focused on not dying.

"Should we just start over?" I ask.

"Sure." He smiles.

"So tell me Annie how does it feel to be the female tribute representing District 4 for the 70th annual Hunger Games." Caesar Flickermen beams.

" I can't believe it is happening to me, I don't know how to process my thoughts because of everything that has happened." I smile.

Finnick and I practiced more, he told me to answer things with double meanings. So it sounds exciting for the Capitol but, for the rest of the citizens or at least my family will know how I really feel.

"Excellent! You got a good training score do you want to tell me what you did?" He smiles.

"I'm not supposed to tell but, I'm sure you will see something similar in the arena." I giggle.

"Oooooo well I will be looking forward to it Annie, I'm sure we all will be. Won't we folks" He smiles and laughs and so does the crowd.

"I sure hope so." I smile.

"What do you think of your mentors?" He asks me. This is supposed to be about Finnick but, I don't think I will talk about him much.

"Well, Mags is such a sweet and kind woman, Finnick is very nice as well but, Luna well... she has a fire that I can't explain." I smile.

"Oooo a fiery personality! All the Capitol citizen like someone with that." He says.

I sigh in relief because he didn't ask more about Finnick.

"But, many Capitol citizens would love to be in your place." He says.

"And why would that be?" I ask trying to hide my disgust.

"Because they would love to know all about Finnick Odair." He smiles.

"Well, I am with them. Finnick is a riddle wrapped around a mystery everything he does confuses me but, he gives great advice." I say truthfully. I can't figure out anything about him because the things he does are strange. I might never know the answer because I might die, this should probably bother me but, it doesn't because Finnick Odair is not my concern.

I walk backstage and see them all looking at me and Finnick is smiling.

"A riddle wrapped around a mystery, and you said you weren't good at coming up with things on the spot." He smiles.

"Because it wasn't, that is what I think of you because something about you doesn't add up."

"Does that bother you Annie?" He says in a seductive voice.

"Nope, that the first time you've heard that?" I tease.

"Maybe." He smiles.

"How does it feel?" I ask.

"Such a strange feeling I don't know how people deal with it." He says sarcastically.

"You should be paying attention Annie, by the way thanks for the shout out." Luna smiles.

I try not to watch the rest of the interviews because I don't want to see their faces or know anything about them, it will just make it harder if I have to kill them.

"Alright everyone let's go upstairs and reflect on the interviews." Aries says.

We head for the elevator and get to the dining room. Aries, Mags, Luna, and Finnick all talk about the interviews but, I tune them out and just pick at my food.

"Alright. Dan, Annie it is time for any last minute questions before you head off to sleep." Aries asks.

"Do you have anything?" Mags asks us.

"Nothing comes to mind." I say.

"Should we kill each other?" Dan asks. and I drop my spoon in disbelief.

"What do you mean?" Finnick asks.

"Well there is only one winner and I have noticed that the District partners don't usually kill one another so...

"Do you want to kill me?" I ask him.

"Not really but, if it came down to me and you at the end, you can guarantee I will choose me."

"Then you have answered your own question." Luna says.

"Okay well, I think I will head to bed." Dan says and leaves the table. I follow suit and walk to my room. I close the door and slowly walk to my bed. I pull the covers over my head and surprisingly fall asleep easily because before I know it I hear Aries is knocking on my door telling me it is time to get ready to head into the arena.

I get up and take a quick shower and put on clothes, I don't see the outfit I'll be wearing in the arena so I assume it doesn't matter. I walk out into the common room and can see Finnick, Mags, and Aries.

"Where's Luna?" I ask

"She took Dan down five minutes ago." Mags tells me.

"Oh." I nod.

"It's time for you to go down Annie." Aries tells me. "Good luck and make District 4 proud!" He exclaims.

When he says this it is as if a thousand knots have formed in my stomach.

"Time to go Annie." Finnick tells me and reaches out his hand. I grab it and he takes me to the elevator.

"Where are we going?" I ask him.

"To the hovercrafts to take you to the arena." He tells me.

"Oh."

"Don't worry." He squeezes my hand which I didn't realize I was still holding.

I nod and we go to a hovercraft and sit down. I am still gripping his hand tightly because I am so afraid, I don't think he minds. His hand feels nice and warm and surprisingly soft.

"Arm." Someone says

I do what I am told, I don't even care what they are doing. I feel something be injected into me and then they walk away.

"That was your tracker, it's so they can tell where you are in the arena. It makes it easy for them but, for the mentors also, because we can always tell where our tributes are." Finnick tells me gently.

I nod. I don't think I will be able to say anything to him.

The hovercraft lands and we are in an underground basement. Finnick takes me to a room that has a four above the door. There is a table of food, a bench, an outfit bag, and the tube that will take me into the arena.

"You should eat something not too much because you will be running shortly. Remember you are supposed to meet up with 1, 2, and Dan, and try to get a weapon to defend yourself."

I walk over to the bench and he goes to the table to get me some food.

"Here." He hands me a plate. I don't know what it is and I can't taste it

He takes the plate from my hand when I have finished and gets me the outfit bag.

"You should get dressed." He tells me.

I take the bag and head to the cubby of the room to change. I open the bag and see black pants, a blue t-shirt, white windbreaker, and brown combat boots. The shirt and the windbreaker have fours on the back of them. I put them on and head back out to Finnick in a zombie like state and walk to the bench. Finnick sits next to me and I grab his hand again, he doesn't seem to mind.

"Annie you can do this." He tells me.

I look at him and I am shaking slightly.

"Remember when your instincts tell you to run you run. Don't eat anything you aren't a hundred percent sure if it is safe, and remember these people are not your friends they all want to kill you." He tells me.

I look at him and a single tear falls out of my eye.

He smiles at me and takes his finger and wipes away the tear.

"Annie, I know you can do this and I will be helping you while you are in there." He tells me.

_Five minutes. _A voice from the ceiling says.

My whole body freezes.

"Come on you should head to your tube."

He pulls me up but, I can't support myself so I almost fall to the ground.

"Annie look at me."

I do as my told.

"Annie count to ten and give yourself that time to let in all the fear and terror then when you stop counting put on that game face and fight. Don't let your emotions get the better of you."

"One." He starts for me.

"Two." I say and start to let all the terror course through my veins.

"Three." He says.

"Four." I say.

"Five." He says

"Six." I say

"Seven." He says

"Eight." I say

"Nine." He says.

I hesitate

"Ten." He tells me.

I don't know if it is in my head but, I feel a bit better.

"Now put on that game face Cresta." He smiles at me

"I got it." I tell him.

He nods.

"Tell me what you got?" He asks me.

"What?"

"What you should do in the arena."

"Find the people from 1, 2, and Dan, get a weapon, trust my instincts, don't eat anything I don't know, these people aren't my friends, and I shouldn't hesitate to kill them because if I don't they will kill me." I tell him.

"Good." He tells me. "And remember myself, Mags, and Luna will be helping you."

_One minute. _The voice from the ceiling says.

I wrap my arms around Finnick. I don't know why, maybe it is because it will be the last person I will hug or maybe it is because I want to feel comfort before I almost die.

He strokes my hair.

_Tributes to your tubes. _

Finnick lets go of me and takes my hand. He leads me to the tube that will rise me to the arena.

"You can do this Annie."

"I can do this." I tell him.

He smiles and I go into the tube I turn around and can feel myself shaking.

Finnick says something but, I can't hear him. I think he picked up on this because he puts both of his hands up.

_Count to ten. _I think to myself. I close my eyes.

_One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten. _

I open my eyes and he is smiling.

The tube starts to rise.

_Get with 1, 2, and Dan. Get a weapon. Instincts. These people are not my friends. Kill them. _I think to myself.

"Welcome to the 70th Hunger Games and as always let the odds be _ever_ in your favor."


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

"The 70th Annual Hunger Games will begin in 60 59 58...

I look around and take in my surroundings. In front of me is the cornucopia and I can see weapons and supplies in front of it. I see that the arena is mostly mountainous and it looks like the only hiding places are behind the crevasses in the mountains.

"30, 29, 28..."

Beyond the cornucopia is a dam like structure filled with a lake and has many trees behind it. It reminds me of something we learned in the History before Panem class, it was called the Hoover Dam. I look around and try to find Bruno, Fizzle, Stevie, Wick, or Dan. I see two circles away from me is Bruno and he smiles and motions to a pile of weapons and I nod.

"10, 9, 8, 7, 6

I hold my breath and get ready to run.

"5, 4, 3, 2, 1." A bell gongs and I run towards where Bruno motioned to. It just now occurred to me that this could be a trap but, he seemed to like me in the training center.

"Game on Cresta." He smiles.

I pick up a backpack and the knife set that is next to it.

I can see Bruno kill someone in front of me. I run to the cornucopia and see one of the tributes coming after me.I throw a knife at them and they go down. I have no idea if they are dead but, I don't have time to think or care about it.

I keep running and run into a boy that looks twelve years old and I freeze he looks terrified. I can't kill a twelve year old boy but, it turns out I don't need to because a sword goes right through his chest.

"Annie get up!" Dan shouts at me and grabs my hand. He drags me to the cornucopia where the rest of the careers are.

I look around and it seems all the live tributes have left.

"They all dead?" Fizzle says and motions towards the bodies.

"I think so." Bruno says.

The cannons start to go off and we look through the supplies.

"I counted nine ." Blaze says.

"Fifteen left." I say.

I see one of the tributes in the field and they stand up. They are supposed to be dead but, he was hiding with the rest of them. It is a smart idea especially since we are so far away. He would be able to run off and hide before we got to him but, it doesn't matter because I pick up the bow and arrow next to me breathe in and shoot him. He goes down and I hear his cannon.

"Fourteen left." Steive says with approval.

"Good job Cresta." Bruno says.

"Thanks." I say but, I can feel my eyes filling up with tears. I'm a murder, I just killed two people.

Dan looks at me and shakes his head so slightly I doubt anyone else noticed. I know if I cried they would just kill me and I don't want that. I want to go home but, I know my odds are slim no matter what Finnick thinks.

"We should set up camp and then go hunting at dusk." Bruno says I have a feeling he is the leader in this little group of ours. He should be the one to kill, I wonder if they are all thinking this. I know I can't kill him and I don't want to run away yet because if I do they would just kill me.

We go through all the supplies and set them into three piles: food, weapons, and medical supplies. This is the most weapons I have seen in my life.

"You're both from four you want those tridents?" Wick asks.

"That's not really our specialty." Dan says.

"It doesn't matter because it seems like Cresta is good at long range weapons. We saw you with the bow and the knives you are very _valuable_" Bruno smiles and looks at me like I'm a piece of meat.

I swallow hard.

"That's true." I say.

"Good." Fizzle smiles but,I can detect jealously.

We wait until it is dusk and they all talk in explicit detail how they are going to kill the tributes. I nod along with them even though I want to tell them this is wrong.

"Time to go." Stevie says smiling.

"Wait who should stay here and guard?" I ask.

They look at one another.

"Your idea maybe you should stay behind." Fizzle says with annoyance.

"No, she should come with us she can shoot from a distance." Dan says.

"But, that isn't as fun." Wick grumbles.

"I can, I don't mind." I say. I want to get ride of them for a bit.

"No, Wick is right, Fizzle you should stay behind."

"Fine." She mutters and sits down.

We look through the woods and I feel strange hunting for people to kill. They end up killing two people leaving twelve people left.

"I think that's fine for a days work, hopefully we can find more tomorrow." Bruno says with approval.

"Yeah I just wish we killed more I..." Stevie says.

"Shut up." Wick interrupts Stevie.

I can hear someone step on some rocks.

"Someone is here." He says.

"Come out come out wherever you are!" Stevie smiles.

"With pleasure." A girl says she looks like she is the one from seven. I think it is stupid that she is trying to face six people by herself but, before anyone can attack her she swings it back and hits Dan and his cannon goes off. She gets his blood all over on me and when I look down I see his head at me feet.

I hear a high pitched noise and wonder what it is, then I realize it is me screaming. My feet start moving before I know what I am doing.

"Get back here Cresta!" Bruno shouts.

"Just let her go, we can kill her later." I hear Stevie say.

I keep running and am crying hysterically. I run into a rock and hit my head on another one and my forehead starts bleeding profusely but, I don't care. I curl up in a ball and cry and don't think I will be able to stop.

_Who does that to someone who decapitates someone._ I keep thinking this and start screaming. I know I shouldn't because it will draw attention to myself but, I can't help it. I sit up and start to rock back and forth a few minutes later something falls from the sky next to me. I back away from it scared. I don't want anything to do with it but, I soon realize it is a parachute.

My hands are shaking so badly that I can barely open it. It contains medication for my head and I also see a a note.

_You can do this Annie. Remember just count to ten. _

_-F._

"Finnick." I whimper and fall to the ground. I count to ten and feel a little better, I put the medication on and crawl into one of the crevasses to hide in. I put some of the elements on me to try and blend in. I sit down and rock back and forth wanting to go home or just wanting to die.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

It's been a week and I have stayed in the same position crying and rocking back and forth. I didn't get any food or water when I ran away but, have gotten some parachutes with it. I don't understand who would want to sponsor me I guess they like seeing a girl sit in the dark crying all day. There are only eight people left but, I know I can't hide forever. This also means people will be coming to District 4 to interview my family. I wonder what they will ask them, maybe why is your daughter crying all the time.

All of a sudden I hear a loud clattering noise.

"What the?"

I look down the way and see rocks are starting to fall, they probably want me to get out of here.

I start running and try to climb my way out of here. I don't want to get crushed by rocks I leave everything I have behind not caring.

"Move, move." I say to myself.

I step up on a ledge and get up out of the crevasse but, rocks are still tumbling down. I start running and rocks are starting to fall all around me.

"No, no." I say thinking I'm going to die one is coming right towards me but I slam down on the ground and roll in the opposite direction but, I'm not quick enough because some of them land on my leg which causes me to scream in agony.

The rocks magically start to disappear and it starts to rain. I roll on my back and slowly sit up. I look at my leg and can tell it is broken I try and get up but, scream because of the pain. I can't move if someone finds me I will die. I crook my neck to the the dam and notice a small crack at the base.

If they don't fix that it will break. I think to myself.

I stay leaning against a boulder rocking back and forth gripping my leg until I fall asleep. I am awakened by the anthem and see two faces in the sky that means six are left.

I spend this time to try and find a new hiding place. I get up but, I keep falling down and have to bite my cheek from screaming. I sit back on the ground and cry I just want to die already. I fall asleep in the wide open when I awaken it is bright outside. I try to get up but, my leg has swelled so much I don't think it will be possible.

"I guess this will be my resting place."

I manage to crawl a few feet but just give up and roll over and cry and a few minutes later I get a parachute.

Where is all this coming from why would someone want to sponsor the poor sad girl. I think to myself.

"They probably feel sorry you." I mumble to myself.

I open it and find a small bottle and read the label. _REGrow bone- take twice a day until injury has healed. Note- while this medication is fast acting it will be a painful process and maybe more painful than the injury itself._

I see there is a note also.

_It tastes bad try not to vomit after swallowing._

_- L._

Looks like Luna sent me this.

I open the bottle and smell it, it smells like peppermint I don't think it will taste that bad. I take out the cup it came with and fill the liquid to the fill line. I sip a little because of the warning Luna gave me and I want to throw up.

"Oh my god that is bad." I say.

It's not that much and it's better than having a broken leg. I think to myself.

I breathe in and out and put it in my mouth my instincts are telling me to spit this out but, Luna said if I did it that it wouldn't work. I close my eyes and swallow it and I do want to vomit. I dry heave but, stop myself from vomiting up the drugs, I lie back down and can feel a shooting pain in my leg.

_Ow Ow Ow Ow. _I think to myself and bite the inside of my cheek to stop myself from screaming. It feels like a thousand needles are stuck inside of my leg. It is like that for a few hours and it dies down but, the feeling of the needles hasn't gone down.

I try and stand and my leg doesn't hurt as badly but, it is still broken. I find a big rock and hide behind it and splatter some of dirt on my face before I go to sleep. I take more of the REGrow Bone and still dry heave and the needle feeling comes back and I bite my lip and fall asleep.

I wake up and my leg looks way better. There is no swelling and it isn't as broken but, it still feels strange. I think I will be able to walk on it. I hear a cannon and bolt right up.

Five left.

I sit up and start to move. I wobble slowly at first and my legs are just very shaky but, then I realize it's not my legs it's an earthquake. I run into a crack where things aren't going to hurt me. It lasts a few minutes and there isn't much damage on my side of the arena. I look off into the distance and notice that the crack on the dam has run up higher.

"They're trying to break it." I whisper.

I sit down and quickly take the REGrow Bone medication I dry heave and fight through the pain and keep walking because I have a feeling they are going to break the dam and I need to get to high ground because all the water will come out. I'm a good swimmer but, if the water force is too strong I'm dead.

I walk probably a mile up hill and then sit down because my leg is hurting too much. I stare at the crack on the dam, I know that is what they are going to do it is almost half way up and water is already spurting out. As if to prove my point there is another earthquake and I can see the crack move up the dam and then the water bursts and starts flooding everywhere. I hear a cannon go off and stand up and see the water rushing towards me it is starting to flood the whole arena.

My mind is telling me to run but, I don't think it will matter because they are trying to drown all of us. They want these games to be over and they want it to be soon.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

I see the water starting to go high up and toppling over the mountains. I turn to run but when I do I get tackled to the ground, this isn't good I have no weapons and can't defend myself. This is it, this is where I die.

I look up to see who my attacker is and it is Stevie.

"Think you can run off and hide and still win this thing Annie." She shouts. She punches me in the face causing me to yelp in pain. She gets off of me and starts ramming my head into the ground.

"You're going to die. Bruno shouldn't have let you run off we should've just killed you then and there." She snarls and bangs my head into the ground again and again, my ears are starting to ring and I'm seeing black spots and can feeling my head bleeding.

"I would draw this out but, I don't want to drown." She says and wraps her hands around my neck and starts to strangle me.

I push her face and try to get her off of me but, I can't breathe and it feels like I'm drowning. It feels like I'm on fire because of how badly my lungs want air. I can feel myself being engulfed by the water as well and the current is strong. I hear a loud band and Stevie has realised me from her grasp. I look for her and see she has drowned by the strong current next to us.

I'm coughing and am not fully in control of myself but, I pull myself together and swim away from the rough current and head somewhere calmer. When I get there I float on my back trying to get a hold of myself. The water keeps rising until we are almost at the top of the arena, there are only three left, this can't last that much longer.

* * *

My body is starting to shake because of how cold the water is by my estimation it has been six hours and it is still three people left. I do a combination of treading water and floating on my back. I'm starting to get tired and it isn't helping that my leg hurts and my neck is still throbbing from when Stevie almost strangled me to death.

I could just stop treading water and go underwater and drown but, to push that thought out of my mind a cannon goes off.

_One left. _

You can do this, just a little while longer and you can be home.

I go and float on my back and imagine that I am back in District 4 at home in the sea, not in the arena. After two hours my teeth start clattering by how cold it is. I wonder who is as a good a swimmer as me. My legs are starting to get weak and my head keeps bobbing in and out of the water causing my mouth to get a little water in it. I stop paddling and go completely under and feel almost at home but, I don't want to die. I push myself and stroke for a little bit more but my head bobs in and out of the water.

I stay like this for ten more minutes and I start having muscle spasms and go all the way under and don't have the energy to pull myself back up. I'm going to die. I close my eyes and see all black.

* * *

I open my eyes and am in a sterile room, I look to my side and see I have an IV in my arm

_What if this is poison that one of the tributes set up for me._ I think to myself.

I rip it out of my arm ,which hurts, and I get up and run out of the room. I find myself in a long hallway and am confused because they couldn't have changed the arena that much. I keep running and run into someone and they grab my forearms.

"No! No! Please don't kill me!" I say. My voice is hoarse from Stevie strangling me. I try to fight them but their grasp is too strong.

"Annie calm down, it's okay. You're just in the recovery center, you're fine."

"No! don't hurt me!"

The voice sounds familiar, it sounds like Finnick but, how would he have gotten in the arena.

"Annie shh you're not in the arena anymore you won just like I said. You're okay, you get to go home." He tells me with compassion.

I stop fighting him and look at him, his eyes have concern in them and he looks tired.

"I won?" I say confused.

"Yes." He tells me.

"But..." I start to feel dizzy and practically collapse in Finnick's arms. He holds onto me and pulls me in for a hug.

"You're okay Annie nothing bad is going to happen to you here."

His body feels warm and inviting. He smells like sea salt and I can almost feel the sunlight on his skin.

"Something bad already happened." I whisper and start hysterically crying. I feel a strange pinch in my side and then it goes black.

I wake up again and am in the same room and have the same IV stuck in my arm. The only difference is Finnick, he is sitting in the room and he is reading something. I don't think he noticed that I am awake.

"Finnick?" I say.

His head shoots up and he walks over to me.

He rolls over the chair that I think is meant for a doctor and sits next to me.

"You're okay Annie." He tells me.

"What happened?" I ask him.

"You won." He tells me.

"But, I don't remember..."

"When you went under the water the other tribute had just drowned. They pulled you out of the water with a hover craft and brought you here to treat you until you heal." He tells me gently.

"Oh." I say.

He smiles and holds my hand I don't shove it away.

"You're going to be okay." He tells me.

I don't say anything. "That's not true, you're going to kill me." I whisper.

"Annie I'm not going to kill you." He tells me worried.

"Then you're not keeping your promise you said if I won you would kill me." I smile.

He rolls his eyes. "I was kidding to make a point, I'm not going to kill you." He smiles.

"Promise?" I tease and hold out my pinky.

"Promise." He says and holds out his pinky and we do the classic pinky promise.

"I can cut off your pinky now if you break this." I tell him in a deadpan voice.

"What?" He says confused.

"That's how it all started. It was to show the people who broke promises." I smile.

"Well, I can assure you that won't happen." He tells me. "I'm too attached to it." He looks down admiring it.

It silent and all I can hear are the monitors beeping and my breathing.

"Finnick?"

"Yes." He says gently.

"Am I really going to be okay?" I ask him.

He hesitates.

"Yes... because I will be here for you."

"Even if I go bat crap crazy."

He smiles.

"Even then, you can't get rid of me Cresta you're stuck with me for life."

I smile because this is the same Finnick I saw the night before training day number two, it's the one he doesn't want anyone to see for some strange reason. I just hope he is telling the truth because I don't want him to go away because I feel safe with him.

**A/N: Yay for ten chapters! Thank you all for reading and reviewing! I am glad you are enjoying it!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

I stayed in the hospital room for a week until I was better but, they also wanted to make sure I pretty enough for my closing interview with Caesar. We have another week while they get my interview dress ready. I don't like being here I just want to go home, I usually end up sitting alone in my room rocking back and forth and crying. Finnick used to stay with me but, I told him to go away because I didn't want him to see me crying all the time. He still checks on me every hour. Like he said I'm stuck with him for life.

I hear a soft knock on my door.

"Come in."

Finnick comes in the door.

"It's dinner time Annie."

"Okay." I say and walk out the door.

We walk out and I can see for dinner we are having pasta. Something easy to swallow down which has been the menu all week: soup, chili. pasta, some interesting mashed dish, smoothies. I think they are doing it on purpose, I had a decent amount to eat int the arena thanks to my sponsors, who I still don't understand how I got. I wanted to ask Finnick but, figured it doesn't matter. I'm sure he could have _persuaded _people to help me.

I sit at the table and he sits next to me

The Avox start to spoon things onto our plate. Theystart to spill some of the red sauce onto the pasta and my mind briefly goes back to the arena and makes me see the blood in the cornucopia. I close my eyes and try and get a hold of myself but regret it immediately because I see the girl from seven sever Dan's head off. When I open my eyes I see his head on my plate.

"NO!" I shout and throw the plate across the room.

"Annie." I hear someone say

"No!" I say and am frozen in fear. I don't have any recollection of where I am, my mind is just blank from fear.

I hear a faint muffling sound it sounds like someone is trying to talk with me but, I can't tell. I sit and stare at nothing for what seems to be a long time.

"Annie it's okay." I hear the voice this time. "You're okay. Just count to ten." I hear. I know this is Finnick talking to me he is the only one who has said this to me. Even though he is talking to me the voice doesn't belong to him. I count to ten but, it doesn't help I'm still in a place between reality and my mind.

"It's okay Annie you're okay, it's not real, you're here with me." Hearing this makes me snap back into reality.

I see his arm is around me and he is looking at me, no one else is at the table and I have no idea how long I was sitting here.

I crook my head and look at him and he smiles at me. I feel like I should ask how long I have been here but, instead I feel a lump in my throat and start crying. He hugs me.

"Shhh shhh it's okay Annie you're safe here."

I hold him in my arms and bury my face in his chest and keep sobbing.

"I want to go home." I whisper.

"Your interview is set for tomorrow, then we will be back in Four in a day." He tells me gently.

I sniffle not knowing what to say. I just hold him and listen to his breathing and heart beating. I do this for awhile and he doesn't seem to care because he keeps rubbing my back. I feel safe.

"I don't want to get interviewed." I whisper.

"Annie." He strokes my hair and I look up at him

"You have to but, most of the victors don't. You'll be okay, just pick a spot in the crowd and look at it, don't pay attention to what they are showing on the screen." He tells me.

"It doesn't matter if I look or not. I still did it." I say.

"You had to." He tells me.

"No, I didn't." I whisper.

"Yes you did."

"No I didn't. I could've just died in there, drown myself or let the rocks crush me." I say.

"Annie don't think that you won not because you are a skilled killer but, because you are a good person."

"Most good people die for that reason." I say "How did I get all those sponsors anyway?"

"People liked you."

"They liked watching a girl sit in the dark and cry." I say confused.

"No... they did it because...

"What?" I say.

"Did you do something Finnick?" I ask slightly annoyed.

"No, they gave you money because they thought you were pretty." He says.

"Yeah right, just tell me what you did."

"Annie, I'm telling the truth." He says seriously and he sounds nervous. I don't know why he would sound nervous.

"Just because that is how you got your sponsor money doesn't mean that is what happened to me." I say.

"You sound offended that people gave you money for being pretty." He says stifling a laugh.

"Well... I don't...

"You don't what?"

"I don't want them to think I'm... like you."

His face hardens when I say this, I probably offended him.

"Why don't you eat something. You should order in case..." He trails off probably not wanting to say in case you start crying.

I take the device and notice I can still only order certain things which makes me upset. I end up ordering a lemon berry smoothie because I don't feel like chewing anything.

"I'm going to sleep." I say.

"Okay." He says and walks me back to my bedroom.

"Good night." I tell him.

"You're okay Annie."

I nod and the close the door and slump against it.

"No I'm not." I whisper to myself. I push my knees to my chest and start to cry. I sit here for the rest of the night, I think I fall asleep but, only for small increments throughout the night.

* * *

I hear a knock on the door.

"Annie it's time to get up you need to get ready for your interview!" Aries exclaims with glee.

I swallow hard. I don't want to do this interview, I don't want to do anything.

I get up and walk out to the common room and see Diana and Dean waiting for me. Diana looks disgusted with me already but, Dean is smiling.

"Hello Annie! Congratulations" Dean says.

"Yes congratulations." Diana says annoyed. I have a feeling she didn't want me to win."Enough chat we have lots of work to do today." She says

I sigh.

They put all this stuff on my face that I am not paying attention to. The whole time Diana is complaining about my skin tone or the dark circles under my eyes. I want to yell at her but I know it isn't worth it.

"There finished!" Dean says proudly.

"Yes." Diana says unamused.

I hear the elevator ding and know that must be Yule with my dress.

Finnick, Mags, and Luna have been here the whole time but, I haven't really acknowledged their presence. I look in the mirror and look ridiculous, there is so much makeup on my face I look years older than I am. It is black and tan makeup that make swirls along my face. There is also very long fake eyelashes that are a blue color and have jewels on the tips. Thankfully they didn't do anything to my hair except make it sparkle.

"Hello Annie." Yule says he sounds annoyed also, I guess he didn't want me to win either.

"Hi." I say sheepishly.

"Puts this on." He says and unzips the outfit bag.

The dress is a champagne color that has jewels on the top that sprinkle down the left side and then there is a mesh skirt. It isn't puffy it is a mermaid cut dress. I do as I am told and put the dress on. I can barely put it on it is two sizes two small and with it on I can barely walk let alone breathe. It hugs my body and leaves nothing to the imagination it is so tight it is either pushing something up or holding it end.

I step back out into the common room.

"So what do you think Annie?" Yule asks.

"It's a little tight." I say.

"It's supposed to be." He says offended.

"So people in the Capitol don't breathe." I say.

Finnick stifles a laugh and Yule glares at him.

"Well, everyone out there will love it." He says

"What if it rips when I sit down." I have a genuine concern with that because it is that tight.

"It won't." He says and walks off.

"Isn't he just a ray of sunshine." I mutter to myself.

Aries comes out.

"Oh, Annie... you look so beautiful."

"Thank you Aries." I try to sound genuine but, it comes out annoyed instead.

"Well, we should get going." He chirps.

We get in the elevator and I walk at snail speed because of how tight it is.

I can hear shouts of excitement when we get down there.

"Am I supposed to do anything special?" I ask.

"Not really. He only probably only ask you five questions at most then it will be the recaps." Luna says.

I nod.

"Victor Annie five minutes." Someone yells.

Finnick walks me over to where I am supposed to be before I walk out on stage.

"Remember Annie after the questions pick a spot in the crowd and stare at it don't look at the screen."

"I'll try." I whisper I don't think I will be able to.

I get grabbed by one of the stage people who will tell me when to walk out.

"Now let's welcome to the stage the victor of the 70th Hunger Games Annie Cresta from District 4!" Caesar exclaims.

I walk out onto the stage and the crowd erupts with cheers, I sit down and smile.

"Hello Annie!" Caesar exclaims

"Hello Caesar!" I say back in a mocking tone.

"So how does it feel to be the new victor?" He asks.

"It feels... different. I just can't wait to go home." I say.

"I'm sure that's true. You want to show off your new victor status."

"Oh you know it." I say sarcastically.

"Well, let's see why you are the victor." Caesar smiles. The lights dim and the screens start to light up.

_Pick a spot in the crowd and don't look at the screens._ Finnick's words ring in my head but, the screens are right in front of me and it's one of those things where you want to look away but you can't.

It starts off showing the cornucopia and the normal stuff happens. I see myself murdering the two people I killed and then we start to leave to search for people to kill. They show the people the careers killed and how they are all boasting about it. I see the girl from seven jump out and know I should look away but, I can't. I see Dan's head fly off again and see myself getting splattered with his blood and it roll in front of my feet. I hear screaming at first I think it is coming from the recaps but, then I realize the screams are coming from my mouth. Then I start crying and can feel my makeup running down my face. I try to stop because I know most of Panem is watching this but I can't. I put my hands over my face trying to hide it but, it is just making it worse but, I don't care. I just want to stop watching this, I just want to go home, I just want to get out of here. I just want to forget and pretend everything that happened here is just some cruel trick or some bad dream but, it's not. It's real, this terrible thing actually happened and I will never forget it because it is burned into my mind.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12.**

I have been home for a few weeks and nothing has gotten better. I hear things and see things whenever I close my eyes. I have nightmares that show me Dan getting decapitated and scream myself awake. My mother is worried about me which isn't surprising because I scream every night, and sometimes talk to things that aren't around. I moved into Victors Village and I am not fond of the place because it just reminds me of the place I want to forget, the place I see in my nightmares.

Finnick sees me everyday which is nice but, it has gotten annoying recently. I like being with him because he can get me to calm down but, sometimes I just want to be , he shows up and invites himself into my house. Sometimes he doesn't even knock on the door which I don't think is wise especially with me being so jumpy. He said I was stuck with him for life but, I didn't think he would come over so often.

Today I am going into town for a walk, I haven't done this by myself yet. I have gone with Lana and Finnick before but, not by myself. People don't want me to be left alone. I don't like because it makes me feel that something is wrong with me because they don't want me to be alone.

I walk on the path out of Victors Village and notice that the leaves have started to change colors, which I like. I like autumn because everything is bright with color. We also have nice festivals during this season but, nothing can beat the spring festivals the flower festival is my favorite but, that is a long while off.

I pick up a leave from the ground and smile at it, it is a perfect yellow color that goes well with the oranges and the reds...

_Red. The color of blood. _I think to myself.

_Think of something else, anything else. _I think to myself but, it doesn't help. The red leafs on the trees are dripping blood everywhere. The yellow leaf flys out of my hand and some of the blood of the red leafs falls onto my face.

"No!" I shout and start running to get out of the bloody rain that is falling on me. I trip on one of the cracks of the sidewalk and fall into the pond near the entrance of Victors Village. I scream loudly, water has not been the same since the arena, I keep thinking I am going to drown. I quickly get out of the water and sit on the small fishing dock and rock back and forth slightly until I get a hold of myself. The water was cold and I am shivering and I get flashbacks of me in the arena but, pull myself together before I start crying.

"You need help?" I hear him ask and see him coming out of Victors Village.

"What are you doing here?" I ask Finnick annoyed.

I comb out my hair and squeeze it to get the water out.

"I heard you screaming, wanted to make sure you were alright."

"Well, I tripped and fell into the pond." I say annoyed.

"Excuse me for wanting to see if you were alright." He smiles and sits next to me.

"Well I'm not." I tell him truthfully

"You're honest." He says surprised.

I shrug "I don't see the point in lying I know what they all say anyways." My chin starts trembling. I know what everyone in town thinks, they all think I'm crazy because I shout at things that aren't there and zone out to escape my troubles.

"Annie you aren't crazy." He tells me gently.

"Gee thanks." I mutter "What would you know anyways, nothing bad happened to you after your games. I think your life improved."

"What makes you say that?" He says confused.

"Come on Finnick, after you won everyone went crazy for you. You can also get any girl you want with the snap of your fingers." I say.

He sighs

"Annie, there are things you don't know." He says.

This comment confuses me.

"Well do tell." I say confused.

He bobs his head back and forth probably debating if he should tell me.

"Annie, remember how you said I did things that didn't make sense or that I was fake?"

"Which time?" I smile

He laughs.

"Well you are right."

"What do you mean?"

He pauses

"Finnick." I impatiently

"Snow he… sells people."

I scoff "Fine don't tell me." I get up but, he grabs my wrist.

"I'm serious." He looks at me and for once his eyes have no sense of humor. He looks very serious. He looks as if he is aged a years and is not nineteen.

"Okay I'll play along what does he sell people for?" I say.

He stands up and is face to face with me.

"Isn't it obvious Annie?" He tells me sadly.

"Not to me." I say.

He sighs

"Sex."

"What?" I say confused.

"Snow sells victors to important Capitol citizens, he sells us so we will have sex with them."

"No." I say not wanting to believe him.

"Yes." He tells me.

"So you mean that Snow is prostituting out all of the victors."

"The popular ones yes."

"So you being the cocky Capitol golden boy who gets any woman he wants is fake."

"Yes." He says sadly

"Okay." I say and stand up

"Anne where are you going?" He asks me confused.

I don't answer him because the person I know isn't the real Finnick. I don't know anything about him. I don't know the real Finnick I just know the one he is forced to be. I think I have seen shreds of the real him but, other than that it is nothing.

"Listen I understand if you want to be away from me but you should know this because…

"Annie." I say pointing to myself

"What?" He says confused.

"That's my name Annie Cresta."

"Annie?" He says worried.

"What's yours?"

"Finnick..." He says confused

"Well Finnick it is nice to meet you. I can't wait to learn all about you… the real you." I smile.

He smiles.

"I look forward to knowing all about you too Annie." He says back.

"Good now that we are on the same page you can walk me home." I say.

"Didn't your parents ever tell you not to go home with strangers." He teases.

"You're right they did, see you later kind sir." I smile and start to walk away.

He runs after me.

"Can't have you walking back by yourself Annie, there are a lot of weirdos out here."

"I have a feeling I'm looking at one." I smile and we walk back to Victors Village laughing the whole way.

* * *

I am sitting outside my house trying to get away from everything. I don't like staying in my house too long, I get an uncomfortable feeling that someone is watching me.

I see Finnick walking back into the village and smile at him. He comes over and sits next to me.

"What are you doing out here? It's kind of cold." He says.

"I don't like being in my house for too long."

"Oh." He says confused.

"It just reminds me of..." I trail off and start to remember the Hunger Games and me being in the arena. I put my hands over my ears to try and get the memories to stop from creeping into my mind.

I feel Finnick put his arm around me.

"It's not real, you're here with me." He whispers. Whenever Finnick says this I always snap back into reality, I think he has noticed this because he says it all the time now. I don't know why this works but, I'm not going to question it.

I look at him and tears are starting to fall out of my eyes.

"It will be okay, just come with me." He tells me and reaches out his hand and takes me back to his house.

We walk inside and his house looks just like mine except for his personal belongings.

"Finnick!" I hear someone exclaim with joy.

A girl who looks thirteen runs over and hugs Finnick. She has brown hair, sun kissed skin, and the same sea green eyes as Finnick, this must be his sister.

"Hi Marci, can you sit here with Annie for a minute." He smiles at her

"Okay." She says and sits next to me on the couch.

He smiles at me and squeezes my shoulder and leaves the room.

A tear falls out of my eye. I try to keep it in so Marci doesn't see but, I couldn't help it.

"Don't cry, Finnick will make it alright. He makes me feel better when I cry." She smiles.

I remember that first night on the train while he was talking with her on the phone. She didn't seem to know her parents were dead.

"Do you cry a lot Marci?" I ask.

"Only when I have nightmares or he doesn't tell me where mom and dad are."

"Marci..."

"What?" She says eagerly

"Nothing." It's not my place to her, her parents are dead. I wonder why she doesn't know, Finnick must have told her before.

Her hair is in an elaborate braid that has flowers in it.

I touch her hair.

"Did you do this by yourself." I say in a cute impressed tone.

She shakes her head.

"No Finnick did."

"Finnick did this?" I say surprised.

"Yes, he's good at weaving stuff. He says hair is just like rope." She smiles "But, between you and me he isn't good with putting in the flowers." She says in a hushed tone.

"It can be difficult." I smile "I am good with that though, I do it every year for the flower festival. I could show you later if you want." I smile.

"Really." She says excited

"Yes." I hear a bang and hear people talking loudly.

Marci looks sad.

"What's wrong?" I ask her confused

"That's probably Finnick and Uncle Michael fighting."

"Why are they fighting?"

I hear the water turn on it's probably to drain out the noise of them auguring.

"He thinks Finnick leaves for the Capitol too much but, he has to go for Hunger Games stuff. But Uncle Michael thinks it is for other reasons."

"Oh." I wonder if his Uncle knows about the deal. If he did I don't think he would be arguing with him.

"Do you go there a lot?" She asks

"No, but Finnick has been a victor longer."

"Five years." She says

"Yes that is probably why." She is only thirteen. I doubt she knows the real reason he goes there.

"Maybe in five years you will go a lot."

"Maybe." I laugh awkwardly because I don't think that will happen. I hope it doesn't happen.

"Do they argue a lot?" I ask.

"Only when Finnick is leaving for the Capitol, which he is tomorrow." She sounds sad

"Don't worry he will come back soon." I tell her gently

"I know." She says

"So you're staying with your Uncle then."

"I live with him." She says confused

"Oh." It makes sense Finnick is only nineteen.

"Well, you still get to see him." I smile

"Sometimes." She says and looks at the floor.

"What do you mean?" Does Finnick not want to see her.

"Uncle Michael thinks he is a bad influence so sometimes he won't let us see him, even though he comes over every day."

"Oh." I get a tight feeling in my stomach because the reason I always hated Finnick was because I thought he didn't care about his family. Turns out his family life is really messed up.

"I wish we could stay here like before. Finnick is the only one who can help me when I have nightmares." She says with tears forming in her eyes. "Jason tries to but he isn't as good so I always have to call him."

Jason is Finnick's brother we are the same age and went to school together. I don't know much about him because he likes to keep to himself but, everyone knows that he is Finnick Odair's brother.

I hear another clatter, the water is drowning out some of the sound but you can still hear it.

"Why don't we sit on the porch. I can teach you how to braid flowers into your hair." I tell her. It will be harder to hear what is going on in the kitchen. I don't think she should hear this but, Marci says this happens whenever he leaves so she has probably heard it many times.

Her face lights up when I say this.

"Okay."

We sit down in the porch and I get a variety of flowers that are next to his house.

"Now Marci the longer the stem the easier it is because it is wraps around your hair." I tell her.

"Okay." She says.

I show her how to do it and she watches intently.

"Here why don't you try on my hair." I tell her and undo what I have just done.

She nods and has a look of pure concentration but, she doesn't get very far because the door clatters open causing both of us to jump.

The person who opens the door is probably in his late thirties. He has brown hair, hazel eyes, and pale skin. I'm assuming this is his Uncle.

"Annie." He nods to me.

"H-Hello." I stutter

He smiles. If Marci hadn't told me those things I would probably be thinking he was a nice man but, that doesn't sound like the case.

"Marci it's time to say goodbye." He says firmly.

"Already? but we just got here." She says disappointed and confused.

"I'm sorry but, Finnick has other things he needs to be doing." He says

I have a feeling that isn't true the only thing he was going to do was talk to me and I don't care if his sister is here. She is nice and innocent. She is pure.

"No!" She shouts and runs into the house.

I can hear her talking to Finnick and can tell she is crying.

"What does Finnick have to do?" I ask him slightly angry.

"Nothing, I just don't want Marci around him."

"Why?" I ask

"That's not really your concern." He says.

I'm getting uncomfortable so I just look at the fountain that is in the middle of Victors Village.

Finnick takes her outside and kneels in front of her.

"Don't cry Marci it will he alright. I will be home soon and then I will see you." He tells her in the same tone he does when I cry.

She hugs him

"Can't I stay here longer." She says looking to her Uncle.

"No, as I said Finnick has things to do."

She looks at me.

"Oh." She says

Finnick grabs her waste so she will look at him.

"It's not Annie, she is leaving after this too, it's Hunger Games stuff." He tells her gently.

"Okay." She whispers and hugs him again.

He strokes her hair and kisses her cheek.

"I love you."

"I love you Finnick." She mutters and I can see tears spill out of her eyes. She lets go of him and Michael grabs her hand and takes her away from here to leave the village.

I turn and look at Finnick and smile at him.

"Do you really want me to leave?" I ask him.

He looks confused but, then his face has realization.

"No, I only said that so Marci wouldn't hate you."

I nod.

He grabs my hand and pulls me up and takes me back inside his house. He leads me to the living room and hands me a glass of water.

"Do you feel better?" He asks me.

"Yes, talking with your sister helped." I smile.

"She has that effect." He smiles but, it doesn't reach his eyes.

"Are you okay?" I ask him. He doesn't look okay he looks hurt.

"Relatively speaking." He says

"Does your Uncle know about...

"Yes." He says angrily.

"Then why does he...

"Because he resents me for killing his sister."

"But you didn't...

"Snow asked me more than once I could've said yes but, didn't so now...

"That's not your fault Finnck just like you tell me it isn't my fault I killed people in the arena."

"But it feels like it is."

"Well it's not." I tell him and reach for his hand. He laces his fingers with mine and I lean against his shoulder.

"It will be okay." I say.

"No it won't. When I go over there and he won't let me in I can always hear Marci crying. She wants to see because she feels safest around me. Especially when she has nightmares of our parents dying. It seems no one else can help her but me."

"Why doesn't she know that your parents are..." I trail off not wanting to finish

"Dead?" He says in a dead pan voice.

"Yes."

"She has been told multiple times but, she either doesn't want to accept it or her mind won't let her. She does have triggers that make her remember and those are not nice days. She has nightmares of them dying but, that is all she thinks they are. Even when she gets told they died in an _accident_ she doesn't believe it." He says sadly.

"Oh." I say sadly "So you're going to the Capitol tomorrow." I say changing the subject.

"Yes, I get to see clients." He says

I nod.

"You'll be home before you know it though." I say trying to comfort him.

"Two days there and two days of travel. Four days total, you won't be able to reach me but, if you feel the need to remember me you can just come in my house."

"Really?" I say surprised.

"It's not like I have anything worth stealing." He says

I nod.

"Can you leave now Annie, I like to have some alone time before I head to the Capitol." He tells me gently.

"Of course." I say. I have a feeling he wants to be alone for other reasons though.

"I will see you before I leave though." He smiles.

I nod.

"Goodbye Finnick."

"Bye Annie." He walks me to the door and watches me until I get inside my house. I close the door and lean against it. I never knew Finnick had such a hard home life. I feel guilty for all of the things I thought about him before I met him, because it couldn't be further than the truth.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

"Annie, Annie it's alright you're fine." I hear my mother whisper to me.

I look around confused at my surroundings.

"Mom." I whimper.

"It's okay sweets, it wasn't real." She smiles.

"It felt real." I say and start crying.

"Well, it's not." She tells me gently. "You're safe here with me, I love you."

"Mom." I say

"What?" She says gently.

I hug her and sob into her chest she rubs back and holds my arms until I fall asleep.

I wake up and see she is still holding me.

"Mom." I say.

She wakes up and rubs my forehead.

"What sweets."

"I love you." I say.

"I love you too Annie." She says in a singsong tone.

We go down stairs and she makes me breakfast.

"Is Finnick coming over here today?" She smiles.

"No, he is in the Capitol."

"Oh, does it have to do with...

"Yes." I say. I told my Mom about the deal with Finnick mostly because I don't think she liked him just like me before I knew the truth.

"Why, do you ask?" I say.

"Well, I don't know dear maybe it is because he comes over here almost everyday." She says sarcastically.

"It's not everyday, besides he just stops by for a few minutes usually."

"He still comes by, he wants to make sure you're alright, he's a good one Annie."

"Mom." I say annoyed.

"What?"

"I don't like him."

"I never said you did. What would make you think that?" She says smugly.

"I... I... don't like him." I say again.

"Maybe you said it because subconsciously..."

"Mom." I say again.

"Alright, maybe I'm wrong." She smiles "But, if anything ever happens will I get to say I told you so." She teases

"Nothing is going to happen."

"Is that a yes?" She smiles.

"Since nothing is going to happen, yes I give you permission to say 'I told you so'."

"Okay." She says and walks over and kisses my forehead.

"So, are you and Lana going to the Oyster Festival today?" She asks me.

The Oyster Festival is a fall festival in District 4. It is supposed to be about catching oysters but really it is just a silly town event. They have contests, games, and they show off the Pearl King and Queen and their court. Then at the end of the night there is always small fireworks. I don't like this festival the most but, it is something to do. My favorite fall festival is the Johnny Appleseed one, it has everything I love about fall. That isn't for a few weeks, it will happen right before my Victory Tour starts.

"Yes, Lana and I go every year."

"I know but, I was just checking because...

"I will be fine Mom, Lana will be with me the whole time." I smile at her.

"I know, I just worry about you, you're my little girl."

I smile at her.

"And I always will be."

"I have to go Annie, will you be alright?" She asks.

"Lana said she would be coming over soon." She nods and leaves, a few minutes later I hear a knock on the door and, I go to answer it.

"Annie!" She says excited

"Lana!" I mock her

She comes in and sits on the couch.

"So we're still going to the Oyster Festival right?" Lana asks

"Of course, we have been going since we were little kids." I smile.

"Yes, and we have to see who the Black Pearl Queen is." She says in a mocking tone.

"I thought it was Black Pearl King and Pink Pearl Queen." I say confused.

"Is it?" She says

"Yeah it got changed a few years ago because Stacy Winkehkuse was elected as Pearl Queen she…

"Wanted more pink." Lana finishes remembering

"Yes so she insisted they find more pink pearls...

"Which is ridiculous because they are a rare type of pearl...

"But they did it just for her so she could shine and be the Pink Pearl Queen...

"And it has been that way ever since." I finish.

We both laugh

"How do they pick these people anyway?" I ask

"It used to be voted on by the town but, now I think it is just a popularity contest. I mean usually it is people from school who are 'cutest couple'" She smiles.

"Oh interesting,how do they come up with these festival ideas anyways."

She shrugs "Don't know, some of them were around before. This place was always in a better financial part of the country like it is today."

I nod.

"I'm surprised Finnick has never been the Pearl King all of the ladies love him." She says

"I think it is because he is a victor."

"Probably, so how is all of that going." She smiles.

I told her all about the act Finnick puts on she was just as surprised as I was.

"What do you mean, he isn't my boyfriend Lana."

"I know, I meant getting to know the real Finnick what is he really like?" She asks me.

"Not narcissistic he's actually pretty down to earth. He's kind and funny and there for me. He's...

"Oh no." She says

"What?" I say confused

"You like him."

I scoff "Lana please I don't like him. Can't I be fiends with a guy and have no intention of having anything romantical happen." I say annoyed. First my Mom, now Lana what is with them.

"You can and you do but, the way your face was when you were talking about him. You had the look."

"What look?"

"The look girls have that says take me I'm yours."

"I don't have that look."

"Annie." She looks at me.

"Lana." I mimic. "He is just my friend if that... maybe just an acquaintance."

"Whatever you need to tell yourself." She smiles.

"I'm serious."

"Okay." She smiles.

I sigh

"We should head down to the square I don't want to miss the opening ceremonies." I say

"Ah yes you think someone will push the mayor in the water again?" She asks

"It has happened two years in a row, so fingers crossed." I smile and we leave the house and he laces her arm with mine.

We get to the square and see everything is set up for the festivities. I see old people from school and they smile and wave, I nod politely, I never was friends with most people from school.

"So any prospects this evening?" I tease Lana, because she usually has some guy she wants to go after.

"Annie, festivals are a thing for you and me but, any other thing I would be looking." She smiles.

"Well, I'm glad I'm number one." I smile.

"And don't you forget it." She says

I look around and see all the scenery. They put some of the leaves up and made them into a collage that looks like an oyster, they have pearls decorated throughout the town, I see the booths that have the foods for the food tasting contests, I see the games that usually have to do with fishing, and I see the stage that will be holding the king, queen, and their court.

"Jason!" I hear Lana shout and wave someone over.

"One of your suitors?" I tease.

She smiles and stick her tongue out at me

"Hey Lana." He says.

I notice it is Finnick's brother. He doesn't look much like him he has brown hair, blue eyes, and pale skin. He is still better looking than the average person though looks like they have that in common.

"Hi Jason, do you know Annie?"

"Kind of…

"Yeah we had some classes together." I say

"Oh... I was going to say because Finnick talks about you sometimes but, yes we did have classes together."

"Finnick talks about me." I say surprised.

Lana smiles and raises her eyebrows trying to prove her point that I like him.

"Well you are friends right?" He says confused

"I guess... I just thought he was putting up with me." I say.

"Trust me Annie he isn't putting up with you." He smiles

I'm about to ask what that means but, the opening ceremonies start. The mayor makes a speech and they let the confetti fly while the trumpets play. They introduce the Black Pearl King who is wearing normal attire, the guys usually do and the Pink Pearl Queen who is wearing a pink dress that has sparkles on it. The they show their White Pearl Court, usually the King and Queen are dating so their court is usually just their friends. The King and Queen sit on the thrones that will overlook the festival. I never got why people wanted to be the King and Queen so badly because, they can't do any of the events they just sit on the stage and watch like wallflowers.

I sigh by how slightly ridiculous all of this is but, I like it because it is what District 4 does. These festivals also bring the whole District together which usually only happens on reaping day because we are a big District. I wonder if any of the other Districts do silly events like this. I guess I will find out when I go on my Victory Tour.

"Well, I should go I promised Marci I would take her around but, I might see you guys later." Jason says and walks off

"So you don't like him." She smirks referring to Finnick.

"Stop that Lana, do you like Jason or something?"

"No he's just nice."

"Just nice? Last I saw of him he didn't talk with other people."

"Well, he does now... kind of."

"What do you mean?"

"We were partners for a project and he was nice and easy to talk to so...

"You started to like him." I tease.

"So we, became friends." She says.

"Well, you get to be with Jason _Odair._" I smile.

She rolls her eyes.

"Let's go, I want to see if I can get a lucky oyster with a pearl and I haven't eaten much so we should sign up to be judges for the food competition."

"Just not the main course part last year all the judges got food poisoning." I say.

"I was going to say soups because it will be all nice and warm and it is kind of brisk today." She smiles and we do just that. After that is finished we walk around the square looking at all of the things the vendors are selling, which they only sell during festivals, and before we know it, it is time for the fireworks. I look at them as they illuminate the sky and it seems as if nothing has changed and I haven't been through the trauma of the Hunger Games.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

I'm sitting next to the pond outside victors village and staring at the water. It is very calm and looks like a mirror, the autumn leaves are reflecting off the water making it the color of fall.

"Hey stranger." I jump at his voice and he sits next to me.

"No stranger than you." I smile up at Finnick

He laughs.

"So when did you get back?" I ask

"A few hours ago." He says.

"Did everything go okay?" I ask not knowing what to say.

"I guess. Did you do anything interesting while I was gone?"He asks

"I went to the Oyster Festival."

"Oh yes District 4 festivals." He says with a smirk

"Do you not like them?" I ask confused.

"No, I do. I haven't been to them in awhile because I'm usually in the Capitol."

"Oh, too bad."

"Yeah, Marci doesn't like going with Michael."

"She wasn't with him she was with Jason."

He looks at me strangely.

"Jason my brother." He says surprised.

"I don't know anyone else by that name. Why does that surprise you."

"Jason has problems being with other people, especially large crowds."

"That's why he never talked to anyone at school."

He nods.

"It's social anxiety."

"Oh." I say.

"Well, we all have things we have to deal with." He smiles.

"Ain't that the truth." I say staring at the water dangling my feet off the edge.

We sit here a few minutes looking at the pond, there are a few ducklings on the water that are making a nice rippling effect.

"Hey Finnick?" I ask shakily.

"Yes?" He says confused.

"Well… right after I won you told me that I got sponsor money because people thought I was pretty... do you think... I mean... that there's a chance...

He looks at me sadly and I have a feeling I know what he is going to say.

"I don't know Annie, I was asking around when I went there but…

"But…" I say scared.

"People do like you Annie but, the final decision will be made after your Victory Tour." He says

"I don't want to... have sex with those people." I whisper.

"Most of the victors don't." He says

"But I'll have to say yes."

Finnick looks at me sadly because he knows this is true.

"Don't worry about it now."

"It will always be in the back of my mind." I say with my chin trembling.

He wraps his arm around me and I lean into him. I think he doesn't know what to say. I know about the deal, if you don't do it then the people you love die. That's what happened with Finnick's parents.

Finnick won at fourteen so he couldn't really have anything done to him until he was sixteen but, Snow kept asking him until he was seventeen. Snow figured he waited long enough so to get Finnick to say yes he killed his parents and had to go to the Capitol the next day or else his sister and brother would be dead too. That is why he left and couldn't be there for the funeral. Finnick thinks it is his fault which it isn't but it isn't helping when his uncle tells him this all the time. If his uncle didn't know about it maybe… maybe I would be able to understand but he does which makes it sad. He also shouldn't be keeping Marci away from him. I don't think he cares if Jason sees Finnick, if I'm being honest I don't think he cares about him at all. The only reason Jason stays there is to be with Marci.

"Annie." Finnick says abruptly

"What?" I ask

I have no idea how long we have been sitting here but, I notice the sun is lower in the sky and my muscles have stiffened from the cold.

"I have to go."

"Okay."

"I want to see Marci and Jason." He says.

I nod and a single tear falls out of my eye.

"Don't cry Annie I can see you tomorrow." He smiles.

"I'm not crying because you're leaving." I mutter.

"Then why are you crying?"

"I don't know it's cold and this is heavy stuff to be thinking about." I say.

"Well, I must say I'm disappointed, I thought it was all about me." He says with a cocky grin and his alter ego comes out.

"You don't have to do that… not here anyways."

He smiles

"Been in the Capitol for awhile it's hard to drop the act." He says

"Well you should work on that." I say.

He looks at me and smiles.

"Okay, maybe I will for you." He smiles.

I roll my eyes.

"Don't do anything for me Finnick Odair just do it for yourself." I smile.

"Strange." He says.

"What?" I say and crook my neck to look at him. His green eyes are locked with mine and they are as deep as the sea I get lost in them because of it. Finnick is famous for his eyes and I have never been close enough to him to see why.

He smiles.

"You're not falling for me are you?" He teases.

I roll my eyes

"Of course not, why do people keep telling me that?"

"That you're falling for me." He says confused.

"Yes." I say annoyed.

"Maybe it because I'm dripping with good looks."

"If you don't get off this dock you will be dripping with something else as well." I smile.

"Annie Cresta are you insinuating that you will push me off of this dock if I don't leave to see my sister and brother."

"I wasn't insinuating, I was implying but yes that is what I said." I smile.

"Well, I guess I should be going then. I don't want to get all wet." He smiles and stands and pulls me up.

"Well, you should be going." I say.

"Yeah, I should be going." He says and gives me a lingering look that sends a shiver through my body. It's not one that I get when I'm afraid, it's a nice feeling.

_Oh no,_ _I like Finnick Odair. _Looks like my mother and Lana were correct. I don't want either of them to say I told you so but... I don't care right now.

Finnick and I are only a couple inches away from each other. I can feel myself moving closer to him and he doesn't back away, we are practically face to face now, I tilt my head and-

"Annie!" I hear Lana shout and I snap back into reality and step away from him and turn to Lana.

"Lana, hey." I say slightly annoyed.

"Hi Finnick." She smiles.

"Lana." He smiles at her. "Well, I'm going to go, until next time Annie." He nods and leaves Victors Village.

When he is out of earshot Lana starts talking.

"Was I interrupting something?" Lana asks smugly.

"No." I say but, can feel myself blushing.

"Well, to me it looked like you were going to kiss him but, that can't be true because forty eight hours ago you said you didn't like him."

"I didn't... I don't...

Lana smiles smugly.

"Should I say I told you so now or later?"

"Nothing is happening."

"Okay." She says and rolls her eyes.

"Nothing is happening." I say again but, don't believe it. I get the feeling Finnick wanted me to kiss him because he didn't back away but, that doesn't make any sense because I don't think Finnick would like someone like me. I'm too plain, I'm too boring, I'm too broken for someone to like me.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

The past few weeks have been strange not because I see and hear things that aren't there but because Finnick hasn't seen me. The last time I saw him was that day on the dock when I realized I had feelings for him and tried to kiss him. I guess it doesn't matter now because the Victory Tour is in tomorrow. He will have to be around me. Before we leave though the last fall festival will be taking place and it is my favorite fall one. I also think by the time we come home all the leaves will be off he trees and snow will be on the ground.

Lana and I are getting ready to go to the last fall festival, the Johnny Appleseed festival, it is my favorite fall festival because it is the essence of fall.

"So who is this Johnny Appleseed guy anyways? Is he a real person?" Lana asks.

"Didn't you pay attention in school Lana?" I ask.

"Sometimes."

I sigh

"They would tell us about it the day of the festival." I say.

"Well, I guess I forgot." She says.

"Well, let me remind your memory. Johnny Appleseed is the person who was responsible for bringing the apple tree to this land. I don't think it started in this region but, the soil is the same so we have some even though, our trick of the trade has always been fish, lobster, and cranberries. The landscape here is pretty vast, I mean do you see a beach here." I motion towards Victors Village all there is the pond, the houses, the brick walk, the trees, and the fountain in the middle. You can see a lighthouse and the sea filled with fishing boats in the distance but, Victors Village is not near a port or a beach. The closest port in this part of the District is in the town square. There are multiple ports throughout the District because of how big it is. The majority of the population work on fishing boats.

"This place isn't near the beach because you don't need a job." Lana smirks.

I nod.

"Didn't think of that… but some people don't live near the docks."

"Not everyone makes a living by fishing, we need shops and hospitals and we haven't been to every part of District 4. We live in the main part where there is more town jobs than fishermen."

"That is true, the only time the whole District is together is for the reaping or festivals." I say.

She nods

"So when are you leaving tomorrow for the Victory Tour?" She asks me.

"Bright and early." I sigh.

"Looks like I won't be able to say goodbye before you leave then." She says sadly.

"You can just say it tonight instead." I smile

She smiles

"Well, I won't be seeing you for a month... maybe more." She says

"I'm sure I will be fine." I say unsure.

"You do get to see the other Districts."

"I guess." I say.

"You also get to see Finnick he won't be able to hide from you anymore." She teases

"Yeah… about that..." I say

"What's with him you try to kiss him and now it's like…

"He probably didn't want me to kiss him." I mutter.

"Trust me when I walked in I could tell he wanted you to kiss him, his body language was inviting."

"Then why does he avoid me like the plague?"

"I don't know, all I do know is if I would've shown up a few minutes later you guys would be like gum on the sidewalk."

"What?" I say confused

"Your faces would've been stuck together."

"Oh well that doesn't matter because that didn't happen."

"Well you have a month to figure it out." She smiles.

I sigh.

"We should go to the square I want to get a caramel apple before they are all gone." She says and stands up.

"They have plenty Lana."

"No, they have plenty candy apples not as many caramel apples."

"Whatever you need to tell yourself." I smile

"It's true don't deny it Annie." She teases.

"I wasn't gonna." I say and roll my eyes.

We walk to the square and it smells like fall. Cinnamon, fresh sea air, pumpkin, baked apples, and the pumpkin glazed fish. We head to the apple booths and buy caramel and candy apples and sit at a table and start to eat them.

"We're going to get sick." I say and take a bite of the candy apple.

"No, because apples are healthy Annie." She smiles.

"But, all these candies on it aren't." I say.

"Well whatever you're eighteen ain't got no time to worry about that." She smiles.

"Nice grammar."

She rolls her eyes "I didn't realize I was in school."

"Well we are probably going to have apple pie as well." I say

"Then skip the pie." She says.

I scoff "Lana no, part of the Johnny Appleseed festival is the apple pie."

"I thought it was the pumpkin glazed fish." She says

"Well that too." I say

"Fine we'll get pie." She says

"Good." I say.

We finish our apples and then get up to walk around to see the booths.

"Let's go over here." Lana motions to the apple archery booth.

"Fine, let's go." I say.

We pay the money for three apples each.

"Alright-

"Annie!" I turn around to see who is calling me. I see it is Finnick's sister.

"Hi Marci. You having fun?" I ask her.

She nods her head. "Finnick over here just bought me some baked apples."

"We had the candy and caramel ones." Lana tells her.

"Finnick thinks that is junk and I shouldn't eat it."

"Hey, hey the apples are healthy." Lana says but, she isn't looking at Marci. I turn around and see she is looking at Finnick.

"Well, with all that stuff on it really isn't." He says

"That's what Annie said." Lana says and eyes us.

"Oh..." He says. "Hello Annie." He says with no emotion.

"Ice ice baby." Lana mutters. I don't know if Finnick heard her but, because I did I'm sure he did as well.

"You ready for the Victory Tour then Finnick?" She asks him.

"I guess, haven't gone on one since mine." He says still in a monotone voice. I feel uncomfortable just being by him.

"I wanna do this Finnick." Marci motions towards the booth.

"Alright." He says and they go off and buy their own apples and bow and arrows. They are plastic so they can't do any damage to you but, you will still get the effect. For this booth someone stands on the other side and you try and hit the apple off of their head. It is quite fun and they have pictures that capture the moment when it leaves your head.

"Okay, do you want to go frist or shall I?" Lana asks me.

"I'll go first." I say and take the plastic bow and arrow from her hand.

"Take your mark." I tell her with a smile.

She walks over to where the body outline is and places the apple on her head.

"Whenever you're ready Annie!" She shouts at me.

I aim the bow and arrow, breath in and out and I let it fly. It is a direct hit, but what I hit isn't an apple it's a tribute. I am suddenly back in the arena and everyone around me is trying to kill me.

"No! No!" I shout and fall to the ground. I press my knees to my chest and start crying.

"Annie, Annie." I hear someone say my name it is one of the tributes.

I get up and start to run away, I keep running until my lungs are on fire and sit down next to a tree and cry.

"Annie! Annie!" I hear someone shout.

I hear a rustling behind and stand up about to bolt but, I see it is Finnick.

"I found her." He shouts.

I back away from him.

"It's Finnick, Annie I'm not going to hurt you." He says.

"I know it's you." I whimper and walk over and hug him. His body stiffens, I think I might have broken some boundary but, I don't care. I want to hug someone and since he is the only other person here he gets the hug.

He eventually wraps his arms around me.

"It's okay Annie." He says.

I grip the back of his shirt and start crying.

"You're okay Annie, you're here with me." I say.

"Haven't be able to say that in awhile." I mutter.

I look up at him and he has a strange expression on his face.

I let go of me and take a few steps away.

"Annie I'm sorry I haven't seen you in awhile it's just..

"What?" I say annoyed. "What happened to you're stuck with me for life Cresta? Or I will always be there for you?"

"Well, I think your mother and Lana did fine helping you."

"It's not the same...

"Annie, please." He says almost in pain.

"It's not the same because they haven't been in an arena, like you have."

"I guess that is true." He says but, sounds a million miles away.

"What did I do Finnick?" I ask him.

"What do you mean?"

"I... you were my friend before but, then you came back from the Capitol you're just... different."

He shurgs. "Maybe, you're just looking into something."

"No, I'm not you would come to my house everyday Finnick. Every. Single. Day." I say with tears forming in my eyes. "I thought you were my friend but, I guess I'm still the tribute you are required to be with." I say and start to walk away.

"Annie wait." He says.

I turn around.

"What?" I say.

"It's just... It's just...

"Spit it out Finnick." I say.

"I don't get close to people and I was getting too close to you." He says.

"Why don't you get close to people?" I ask confused.

"Because then Snow just has one more reason to control me."

I shake my head.

"But, he's still winning." I tell him.

"Annie you don't understand...

"Oh, I understand Finnick. You're letting him control you still by not wanting to get close to others. It's the same thing, you have to make a choice either live in fear that Snow is going to hurt anyone you come in contact with or let people in." I say and walk away from.

When I come into view I see my mom.

"Annie!" My mom shouts and hugs me.

"I'm okay mom."

"I know." She says and strokes my hair. "I love you sweets but, let's go home." She says.

"Okay." I say. I'm not going to fight her. I actually want to go home.

We walk back to my house in Victors Village and I sit down in the kitchen.

"Where's Lana?" I ask.

"She went back to the festival."

"Oh, I wanted to see her before I left for the Victory Tour." I say disappointed.

"Don't worry, she will be coming here shortly."

"But..." I say confused.

My mom smiles, gets me some tea, and rubs my back. I hear a knock on the door and my mom goes to get it.

I see Lana and she is carrying lots of things.

"What did you do?" I ask.

"I bought everything you would've eaten while we were there. I even bought cinnamon sticks so we can have that cinnamon smell in the fire." She smiles.

"Thank you Lana." I say.

"Let's start that fire." She says. We do and within twenty minutes it smells like cinnamon and apples. She starts to take out the food. The pumpkin glazed fish, the baked apples, seaweed vegetable medley, bread with cinnamon butter, and of course the apple pie and hot apple cider.

We sit and eat in front of the fire on a pile of pillows.

"Why did you buy too full pies?" I ask.

"One for me and one for you." She says and gets the thermos of apple cider and pours them into the mugs and adds the cinnamon sticks.

"Thanks." I say as she hands it to me.

"You know I can get you a plate." I tell her as she is eating straight from her pie tin.

"Then you will have to do dishes and it's another added bonus to getting a pie for each of us." I say.

We eat the pie by the fire and sit in silence for a few minutes.

"So Finnick say anything when he found you?" She asks me.

I nod.

"He says he doesn't like to get close to people because of that whole deal with Snow." I roll my eyes.

"That doesn't make sense." She says.

"Apparently it has to do with having more people he can use against him."

"Okay that does make sense." She says.

"But, Snow is still controlling him, it's messing with his mind."

She puts down her pie plate and hugs me.I hear a knock at the door I look at Lana and she shrugs, we head to the door together. I open the door and see Finnick.

"What are you doing here?" I ask him.

"I'm making a choice." He says.

I smile.

"You brought pie too." I say.

"Well that was in case you didn't want to let me in, I figured no one says no to free pie." He smiles.

"Oh, well Lana brought me some so your plan wouldn't have worked."

"I should be going though." She says and takes the rest of her pie. " Good Luck with your Victory Tour Annie." She hugs me. "Take care of her Finnick." She says looking at him.

"I will." He says.

She nods and then leaves.

"Come in." I tell him.

"You're house smells like the festival." He says confused.

"Well, Lana brought it into my house." I smile/

We sit down on the kitchen table.

"She's a good friend." He says.

"I'm not going to argue there." I say.

He smiles.

"Annie who was at the door?" I hear my mom ask.

"It was Finnick." I say and motion towards him.

"Oh, well I will just you leave you alone then." She smiles and I want to roll my eyes by how happy she is with this.

"No, Mrs. Cresta that isn't necessary I just wanted to drop a pie off for Annie in case she didn't get any."

"That was very thoughtful Finnick and I'm sure you two will talk more on her Victory Tour." She smiles.

"Yes I'm sure we will." He says eyeing me.

"I'll walk you out Finnick." I tell him.

He smiles.

"So, see you tomorrow?" I say.

He gets close to me and places a strand of hair behind my ear.

"See you tomorrow Annie." He says with his hand still on my cheek while looking deeply into my eyes.

He takes his hand off my face.

"You should get some rest, it might be the last good one you have until this Victory Tour is over." He says sadly.

I swallow hard "Okay." I say.

"Goodnight Annie." He says.

"Goodnight Finnick."

He stares at me for a minute as if waiting for something but, then leaves. I think Finnick is my... friend again which makes me happy but, his comment about not being able to sleep on the Victory Tour makes me feel queasy.

**A/N: Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I also want to remind you that in my story District 4 is set in New England and not somewhere is the south/west coast like most stories are. My sister and I always pictured it here because it made sense with the whole fishing thing and it being a wealthier District. I don't think there is an official map so I think it is up for you to decide and this is where I always thought it would be it doesn't really matter but, someone sent a message about the fall leaves so I thought I would mention it. Anyhoo thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I'm glad you like it!  
**


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

"Oh Annie you look marvelous." Aries says.

"Thanks." I say this time I have to agree with him I don't feel that ridiculous maybe because it is just casual clothes. Yule has me dressed in average clothes except they have a Capitol touch. I am wearing jeans but he has woven gold thread into them so it will shimmer and I am wearing a red sweater that in the top left corner has the deal of district 4 woven into it. I'm not even wearing ridiculous makeup just makeup that looks natural and will probably come off easy compared to the opening ceremony makeup. My hair is also pulled back in a pony tail which makes me feel comfortable.

"Annie you look so normal." My mother says surprised.

"Well, Mrs. Cresta I was aiming for simplicity here but, for District One, Two, and the Capitol it will be quite something." Yule smiles. I involuntarily groan which causes him to glare at me. I know I will be wearing clothes that are two sizes two small and lots of ridiculous makeup.

"Okay Annie it is almost time for your interview with Caesar that will kick off the Victory Tour!" Aries exclaims.

I go outside and see the cameras that will record my interview with Caesar.

I see Finnick, Mags, and Luna all sitting out there. Finnick comes towards me once I head outside.

"Am I supposed to do anything?" I ask him.

"Just answer the questions and smile. I don't think it will be very many because of what happened during your recaps." He smiles and places a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Finnick do not touch her! She was just picture perfect!" I hear Yule yells.

"Can't have one hair out of place." I mock.

"Exactly, see Annie understands." He says

Finnick goes back over with Luna and Mags.

They fix my hair even though Finnick didn't do anything and then Aries tells me to wait by the door.

"I will tell you when to walk." Aries says.

I nod. I get a tight feeling in my chest because of how nervous I am.

"Now, let's give it up for the Victor of the 70th Hunger Games a Miss. Annie Cresta!"

Aries shoves me and I walk in front of her.

"There she is!" Caesar exclaims.

It is a one way conversation I can't see him but, he and the rest of the Capitol can see me.

"So Annie how have you been since we saw you last?" He asks with glee.

"Everything has been wonderful." I say with a fake smile plastered on my face.

"Wonderful? Care to elaborate Annie?" He asks.

"Words can't describe it but, I am very thankful." I smile.

"I'm sure you are, well it was nice seeing you Annie. I can't wait to see you back in the Capitol! Good luck on the rest of your Victory Tour!" He says and then everything turns off.

"That was perfect Annie." Aries says.

"Well that is what I strive for." I say sarcastically.

"I know." He smiles. I wonder if people in the Capitol understand the concept if sarcasm.

"Everyone be ready in fifteen! That is when the train rolls out!" Aries yells and I can see everyone heading towards the train but, I don't I head back inside.

"Mom!" I shout.

"Annie good I was hoping I could see you one last time." She says and hugs me.

I don't say anything I just hold her tight. I can feel my eyes filling with tears.

"I don't want to leave." I whisper.

"I know but, you will be back here before you know it." She says and kisses my forehead.

I hold her tight for a few minutes.

"You should probably get going sweets, I don't want Aries to be mad at you. That wouldn't be a nice way to start off this long tour."

I smile and look up at her.

"Okay." I whisper.

She starts to walk me towards the door.

"And don't worry I'm sure Finnick will make you feel better." She smiles and kisses my cheek.

"Yeah." I say not fully believing it myself. He stopped talking to me for weeks and even though he did a nice gesture the other day it might not mean anything.

I walk out the door and those thoughts leave my mind because I see Finnick waiting outside for me.

"You ready?" He asks.

"Not really but, I have a train ride to brace myself." I smile.

"That's the spirit." He smiles "Come on you don't want Aries on your bad side this early, especially since he hates the start of the Victory Tour."

"Why is that?" I ask

"Because the celebrations are such a bleak affair." He says impersonating Aries.

"Why would he think that?" I ask.

"I think going there will explain it best." He says sadly.

"Is it bad Finnick?" I ask confused.

"All of the Districts have one aspect that is disturbing." He says and we reach the train.

We get on the train and I get a tight feeling in my chest. I am getting reminders of being here last time.

I start breathing quickly.

"You're okay Annie, just count to ten." I hear Finnick whisper to me. I close my eyes and do that and feel better.

"You okay?" He asks me.

"Fine." I whisper.

"Okay." He says and we head to the main car.

"Alright here they are, now let's go over the schedule. This will last a month because of the traveling aspect but, it is worth it Annie. They are all celebrating you." He says

"Yes they are." I say bluntly.

"Well, we have three days to work on that personality." Aries says.

I nod.

"Good." He says. We eat and then we head I sleep.

I head to my room and lie down on the bed. I toss and turn and think I won't be able to sleep, just like the first day last year.

I stand up and see there is water on the floor.

"What the?" I say confused.

I go to the bathroom and figure that is where it is coming from, probably a leak but, nothing is there. The water starts to rise though, it is up to my knees and keeps rising. I try and open the door but it won't budge, maybe the whole train is getting flooded.

It's up to my waist and I try to find a way to leave the room but it is no use. I'm trapped and I'm going to drown.

"Help! Help!" I say in a sob like shout.

The water is up to my neck now. I'm knocking on the door and screaming for help but no one comes. The water goes over my head and I know I will die here on a train. At least I will never have to go on my Victory Tour.

The door opens and all the water flows out. The person who opened the door comes over to me.

"Annie relax you're safe here."

I realize it is Finnick

"The water?" I ask.

"What?" Finnick asks confused.

"Where did it all go?" I say confused.

"Annie there's no water here." He says

"But I was just drowning. How else could I have gotten all wet?" I motion to myself.

"Annie look down." He says. I do and notice I'm not wet.

"But... no, it was real. It was real Finnick there was water everywhere. I was dying." I say.

"Annie, there was no water you imagined it."

"It felt real." I whisper.

"Come here." He takes my hand and leads me to the bed and I lean against his shoulder.

"What's wrong with me Finnick?" I ask.

"Nothing." He says and sweeps his hand across my face. "You should go to sleep, everything will be alright." He tells me.

I nod. He gets up to leave

"Finnick." I say.

"Yes?" He asks and walks back over here.

"Can you stay in here until I am asleep. I don't like to be alone after something like this happens." I say with my chin trembling.

"It would be my honor to do that Miss. Cresta." He smiles and sits in the chair next to the bed and holds my hand. I find sleep quickly and am greatful that Finnick is hear for me because I don't think I could do this alone.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Hello everyone while I was looking at my outline for this story I realized I messed up the order of the seasons for some reason. I thought it was summer spring fall winter instead of summer spring winter fall, whoops! So that is why it will be winter after the Victory Tour is over. You probably didn't care or even notice but, I wanted to say it because I felt like an idiot lol. Thanks for reading!**

**Chapter 17.**

The past three days on the train have been rather boring, the only thing we do is listen to Aries talk about the celebrations he loves the best. Finnick was right he didn't mention twelve, eleven, or ten at all. They are at the lower end of the spectrum. I am nervous to see the people from here, we will be rolling into District Twelve later today and I have a million knots in my chest.

Sleeping on this train has been the worst, I can't get a goods night rest. I keep thinking I am going to drown and when I close my eyes I see people getting murdered in front of me and blood splatter, sometimes I can't tell if I am having a nightmare or if it is really happening to me. It isn't helping that I am worried about visiting the other Districts. I zone out sometimes to escape reality it makes me feel better but, it makes everyone around me concerned.

I'm in the common room and I am sitting alone and keep picking at my cuticles. I think everyone else is in the dining car but, I'm not very hungry. We will be reaching District Twelve in a few hours, I'm suppose to talk about my speech but, I don't want to talk or think about it. Everyone else thinks it will be better to be prepared, I know they are right but, I keep thinking if I avoid it long enough it will just disappear.

I hear one of the doors open and my stomach tightens.

"There she is!" Aries beams.

"Here I am." I mutter.

"We all need to go over today's events, can you please join us in the dining car?" Aries asks me gently which catches me off guard.

"Um... y-yes." I stutter.

"Is something wrong Annie?" He asks me.

I am debating if I should tell him the truth. He is from the Capitol, I don't think I can be one hundred percent truthful.

"I'm just scared I don't do well with public speaking." I say. This isn't a lie, I don't like speaking in public.

"It will be alright Annie, myself and the rest of the mentors have already come up with what you are supposed to say." He tells me and rubs my shoulder.

"Thanks Aries." I tell him.

"For what?" He says confused.

"Just for being here." I say.

"Well, I enjoy being here." He says.

I smile and both of us head to the dining car. I take the open seat which happens to be next to Finnick.

"Are you okay?" He whispers to me.

"I guess." I say. I grab some toast and a mug and pour some tea. Finnick pushes the sugar cubes towards me, he knows I like sugar in my tea.

"Sugar cube?" He says putting on the fake charm he uses with the Capitol women. He picks one up and puts it between his teeth and raise his eyebrows seductively. He bites down causing the sugar to melt in his mouth.

I roll my eyes.

"That may work on Capitol girls but not on me Finnick Odair." I tease and grab three sugar cubes and plunk them into my tea.

"My apologizes Miss. Cresta." He says and makes a strange face.

"What?" I ask.

"Too sweet." He says and grabs a napkin to spit out the rest of the sugar that was in his mouth.

"That's what you get." I tease

Finnick smiles and looks into my eyes and I get lost for a minute.

"Ah hem." Aries clears his throat. Which causes both of us to snap back to reality.

We both turn to him smiling.

"Now, we will be in twelve in an hour but, first Annie do you have any questions?" He asks me.

"What am I supposed to say?" I ask.

"As I said out there we came up with something to say for you here." He says and hands me a card. I notice there is a twelve on the top left corner they must have one for each District. It reads

_District Twelve I thank you for your generosity for sharing this glorious celebration with you today. It really is an honor to be with you, the tributes from this District had such pride and courage in the games. They would be happy to celebrate with all of us and in a way they still are. We should all be grateful for the generosity of the Capitol for giving us this opportunity to all come together. Thank you. _

"Do I have to say that last line?" I ask a bit disgusted. I don't want to thank the Capitol. Victors say that almost every year and each year it makes me angry.

"The bit about thanking the Capitol is almost a requirement Annie." Mags tells me gently.

"But, I'm not grateful." I mutter.

"You should be Annie. After all that is why we are all here."

And the small amount of respect Aries he just earned has disappeared.

"Don't worry Annie, as a tip stare at the sky and not at the people or the family members." Luna says. "Especially in this District." She adds.

"Why _especially_ in this District." I say confused.

"You killed the male tribute from here Annie." Finnick tells me gently.

"Oh...I didn't even know his name." I say sounding disgusted with myself. My chest starts to tighten and my palms start to sweat.

I feel someone hold my hand and look up and see it is Finnick.

"It's okay Annie." He tells me. "You're going to be okay besides, I think your mind will be distracted enough just from District Twelve."

"What is that suppose to mean?" I ask.

"It's very different from Four." Mags says.

Aries laughs "That is the understatement of the century. Annie the people from District Twelve don't have it good. They all look unkempt and almost dying from starvation and have no mention. Not to mention the _smell_ and the coal dust that will wreak havoc on your clothes. I hope Yule didn't plan for a white outfit." Aries says with disdain.

"Oh." I say.

I pick at the rest of my toast and fold an unload my speaking card for the rest of the time. Yule calls me back and starts to get me ready and it isn't a white outfit. It's a blue almost black long sleeve dress and has silver specks on it. I am also wearing black tights and shiny black and white flats. I have a black ribbon in my hair that is tied in a bow. Yule didn't do much with my hair he used a hot iron to make my hair straighter even though it is naturally straight. The makeup was just a touch here and there like he said it is calm until the richer Districts.

"There all done." He says.

"Thanks." I say.

"We're here!" Aries says. He doesn't sound as chipper as he usually does though.

We slow and get off of the train station and Aries was right about the smell. It smells like what I imagine death would smell like. It is a mixture of the coal and a compost like smell. I look out and see that they have snow on the ground already but it is tinted grey probably from the coal dust. I don't feel cold, it is probably because I'm so nervous.

They have woods and everything looks a mess, the houses they have don't look safe to be in. Aries was also right about the citizens they all have long faces and their skin is sagging off of their bones. Most of them look malnourished, I never really noticed how the tributes looked from here. I guess that makes sense because no one seems to care about this place. I feel a tightness in my chest for this people. I feel sorry for them how can we have it so good and they have this. I wonder what the other Districts look like.

"Now Annie before your speech you get to meet the other victors. Here there is only one: Haymitch Abernathy." He says.

The man I get introduced to looks to he in his late forties early fifties. He has tangled unkempt hair and is wearing dirty clothes. He reeks of alcohol and his face is in a snarl and I don't see any smile lines on his face. He doesn't seem very welcoming, I feel a lump forming in my throat and can feel my hands sweating.

"H-hello." I stammer.

"Why hello victor Annie." He sneers. He sounds drunk, that would explain the strong smell of alcohol.

I smile awkwardly.

"So do you enjoy these events?" I say. I know the answer is no but, I don't want to sit in awkward silence.

"What do you think." He grumbles. I don't usually like sitting in silence but, I think that is better in this situation.

"Be nice Haymitch." Mags tells him and I feel relieved.

"My apologizes Miss. Cresta." He slurs and saunters off.

"It's okay Annie, he's like that with everyone." She reassures me.

"Oh good... I think."

She smiles.

That doesn't sound like a good response but, I'm assuming it has to do with his games.

"Alright Annie, you're on in five." Aries shouts. I start to grip my dress, the fabric is smooth, it is almost calming but, I can feel my eyes filling up with tears for some reason. I feel someone touch my hands and a tear escapes my eye.

"Don't worry Annie it will be alright." Finnick tells him.

"I'm scared." I whisper.

"It will be fine, just look out at the horizon don't look at the citizens and read this. He places the card in my hand that has three sentences on it. I clasp Finnick's hand it cause the paper to crumple but, I don't care. I can tell I'm shaking and probably have the deer in headlights look. I wrap my arms around Finnick and squeeze him tightly against me.

"It's okay Annie, you're alright." He whispers in my ear and rubs my back.

"I can't do this, I want to go home." I say. I know I have to do this and won't be going home for a month but, it feels better saying this.

Finnick pulls me off of him.

"You can do this, count to ten and let it all in and then but on that game face." He tells me like he did before I went into the arena. I do and it helps, not much but, I think I will be able to read three sentences off of a card.

Finnick squeezes my shoulder

"You're alright, remember look at the horizon." He tells me.

I nod.

"Annie come here!" Aries shouts.

"Good luck." Finnick says and winks at me.

"Now, introducing Victor Annie Cresta." The mayor says.

I walk out on stage to the microphone, I can tell I'm shaking again. I look out into the blue sky, I am avoiding the citizens faces but, I can feel their glares being burned into my skin.

I look down at the card they wrote out for me.

"H-hello District Twelve it is such an honor to be here with you today um... the tributes here had lots of courage and pride during the games they would be h-happy to be here celebrating with us today and we... and we..."

Here come the part where I have to say we are grateful for the Capitol. Mags said it was pretty much a requirement to say this but, I don't want to. I close my eyes

"And we should be very grateful for the Capitol for presenting us with this opportunity." I open my eyes and see the looks on the citizens faces they look angry. My eyes flicker to the back where the families are and I see the boy I killed, he was young probably only thirteen, he is the one I shot with the arrow. I can feel a lump forming in my throat and tears forming in my eyes.

_I killed you_ I think to myself.

Someone pats my shoulder and I see it is the mayor. He smiles at me and then does an outro and I walk into the Justice Building woodenly and that is the last thing I remember.

* * *

I look around and am confused by my surroundings, that last thing I remember was being in Districts' Twelve Justice Building but, now I'm in the common train car and Luna and Finnick are sitting across from me. Finnick is reading something and Luna is crocheting something.

"What happened?" I ask and both of their heads snap up.

"Annie good you're back." Luna says.

"Back?" I say confused.

"You've been sitting here for hours Annie, what's the last thing you remember?" Finnick asks me gently.

"Walking into the Justice Building then... I don't remember." I say confused.

"That does sound about right. Once you sat down in the Justice Building for your dinner celebration you were in a zombie like state. You didn't eat anything or say anything, we didn't think we would be able to get you back on the train but, Finnick managed to get you to walk onto the train. You didn't say anything and your eyes were glazed over. You plopped down on that couch and have been sitting here for." Luna looks to the clock "Four hours, everyone else went to bed around an hour ago. Finnick and I volunteered to stay awake until you came back to us." Luna tells me and smiles.

"Oh..." I say and start to feel dizzy. I put my hands over my face and start crying.

Finnick comes over to me.

"I'll leave you two alone, goodnight." I hear Luna say and hear the door open and close.

"It's alright Annie, you're safe here."

"I know." I say but, keep crying.

Finnick takes my hands away from my face and I look at him.

"You're okay." He tells me.

"Then why don't I feel okay? Why can't I remember the past four hours of my life?" I ask. "What's wrong with me." I whisper and start sobbing.

Finnick pulls me in for a hug. I wrap my arms around him and bury my face in his chest.

"Shhh, it's okay Annie. Nothing is wrong with you, you're fine."

I don't respond I just cry and hold Finnick close to me. I cry until my eyes can't produce anymore tears then I just grip Finnick tightly.

"You're okay Annie, do you want to go to sleep?" He asks me.

"No." I whisper.

"Why not?" He asks me and strokes my hair. He must know I'm tired.

"I'm too afraid to sleep. I always see them, I always see it." I say and start rocking back and forth remembering it.

"It's alright Annie." I hear Finnick whisper and am back in reality.

"I understand but, maybe you should lie down. It might make you feel better." He tells me gently and rubs my back.

"I don't want you to leave." I say the words before I can stop them from coming out of my mouth. I don't want to be alone and being with Finnick make we feel safe.

"I'm not going to leave you Annie. I won't leave you, not when you need me." He tells me seriously.

I back off of him and look into his eyes, they contain worry but, dedication also. He isn't lying he really isn't going to leave me. Finnick takes me to my room and I go to the bathroom to take off my dress. I look in the mirror and I look a mess. My eyes are red and puffy and have a starange look in them, and my makeup has slightly run off my eyes. I take all of it off and put of pajamas. I head back out and sit down on the bed and lean against the headboard. Finnick is sitting on the chair he probably doesn't want to sit in the same bed as me, it might overstep some boundary but, I don't care. I pat the space next to me.

"Finnick you can get in the bed with me." I say.

He smirks

"That's what all the girls tell me." He says.

I smile but, don't say anything I lean on his shoulder and he places his arms around me.

"You're okay Annie." He whispers in my ear.

I don't say anything I just listen to his breathing, this soothes me and I find sleep quickly.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

I wake up and notice Finnick isn't here he must have left once I was completely out. I don't blame him I think I would've done the same thing. I roll over and try to go back to sleep, the longer I sleep the longer I won't have to think about District Eleven. It is four days away and Aries says the weather is better there. I don't care about the weather I just care about the people who I will have to look at.

I hear the door open and turn to it, I see it is Finnick and he is holding an apple.

"Oh, sorry did I wake you up?" He asks.

"No, you don't have to check on me." I tell him.

"I know I don't have to I _want _to." He smiles and sits on the edge of the bed.

"When did you leave?" I ask him.

"What do you mean?" He asks confused.

"The room, you weren't here when I woke up."

"Oh, I got up to shower and eat something." He says and holds up the apple with a smile.

"You stayed here all night?" I say surprised.

"You said you didn't want me to leave. Should I have left? Do you want me to leave now?" He asks concerned.

"No, you don't have to leave. I just assumed..." I trail off.

"I said I wouldn't leave when you needed me. You said you needed me." He smiles.

I can feel myself blushing.

"Thanks." I say and don't meet his eyes because I'm afraid I will get lost in them.

"No problem." He smiles.

"So what's it like?" I ask.

"What? District Eleven?" He asks confused

"No... I..." I don't know what I was going to ask him.

"Then what is it Annie?" He asks.

"I don't know." I say confused.

"Okay." He says and looks at me strangely.

"What is District Eleven like though?"

"Big, hot, lots of people... lots of peacekeepers also." He says with no emotion.

"Oh." Is all I can muster.

"It will be okay, you have two more days to mentally prepare yourself."

"I don't want to do that. I just want avoid it."

"Annie you can't avoid it forever." He tells me gently.

I sit up and scoot next to him, he smiles and I lean against his shoulder.

"Finnick." I say and swallow hard. I think I can muster up enough courage to tell him I like him.

"What?"

"I-

I hear a knock on my door.

"Annie, we need to go over the schedule and I know you're awake because I can hear you talking with Finnick." Aries says.

"Why do we need a schedule when we won't be there for two days?" I ask Finnick.

"It's not just the schedule he is trying to get you to be more comfortable in front of large crowds." Finnick says

"How can he do that when we are in a moving train?" I ask confused.

"With some Capitol device." He smirks.

"Ah yes those." I smile. "I should probably get dressed." I say.

He nods to get up and leave.

"Annie." He turns around.

"Yes?" I ask confused.

"Did you want to tell me something?" He asks.

"No, nothing." I lie. The moment has passed and it doesn't feel right anymore. Aries would just hurry me out of here anyways not giving him enough reaction time. Maybe I shouldn't tell him on the train, if he doesn't like what I'm going to tell him the rest of the Victory Tour will be awkward and uncomfortable.

He nods and leaves the room.

I take an abnormally long shower to avoid whatever Aries wants to do with me, by the time I get out my hands are all pruney. I get dressed and pick soft knit shorts and a loose black tank top. I get up and head to the dining car, Aries is surprisingly in there opposed to the main car.

I get bacon, eggs, and orange juice for breakfast, I didn't eat anything last night so I am hungrier than usual. I see Aries sitting at the table sipping his coffee and reading what looks to be a newspaper.

"Good Annie you are ready, now yesterday didn't go as well as planned so I figured we could practice." He reaches in a file for something. "Here is the card for District Eleven." He says and hands to me.

I look down and notice it is pretty much the same thing but, is phrased differently. I don't think it will matter how I say it, as long as I make sure to thank the Capitol.

"Thanks." I say with a smile.

"Well, your performance yesterday was not... up to par. I think it was because you were nervous so, I came up with a little test run that can help you." He tells me.

"O-okay and how will we be doing this?" I ask confused.

"Come out to the common room when you are finished."

I eat the rest of my breakfast slowly, I probably chew every bite fifty times. I sigh and get up and head to the common room when I do I see Aries has something projected in the area. It reminds me of some of the things that were in the training center.

"What's this?" I ask confused.

"This will be a projection of what to expect in District Eleven, now stand here so the motion censors can pick you up." He pushes me to a spot right in front of the screen and it starts to light up. I see a Justice Building that the has the Eleven seal on it. I don't see much else except the large crowd, most of the people have scowls on their faces. I feel nervous even though this is just a projection of what the District will look like but, I still have an unsettling feeling in my stomach.

"Now, read off the card Annie." Aries tells me.

"H-hello D-district Eleven it is nice to be here to today for this celebration. I'm sure the tributes from this District would like to be here as well and in a way they are, they would want to celebrate my victory- _my victory_ really Aries?" I ask annoyed.

"You did win and I'm sure they would want to celebrate for you." He smiles completely clueless.

I sigh.

"Do you not like it because you could come up with something on your own but, I will want to approve it." He smiles.

I roll my eyes.

"I will stick to it but, it may not be exactly what is written on the card." I mutter.

"Well, as long as you keep the same idea I suppose that will be alright." He says slightly offended.

I keep doing this and it isn't really helping, I think Aries gives up when he tells me to stop. Tomorrow he says we might be working on my posture while speaking, apparently I slouch. He said we should figure this out before we get to the important District, I couldn't care less and I don't think anyone else will care except District One, Two, and the Capitol.

I head to the dining car to get some lunch but, really I think it is just something to do.

I see Mags sitting at the table as well.

"Hello." I tell her.

"Hello Annie, how is it going with Aries?" She asks me with a smile. I think she knows it is useless too.

"Fine I think he's given up for today." I say

"Well, that's good." She smiles

"Tomorrow we have to work on my posture." I impersonate Aries.

She smiles and I can hear her chuckle softly.

The door slides open and Finnick comes to the table. He pulls the chair out vigorously and slouches in it.

"Is everything alright Finnick?" Mags asks him gently.

"It's..." He trails off.

"Why don't we head to my room." Mags tells him.

They get up and leave, Finnick looked upset I wonder what was wrong. Mags clearly knew he wouldn't want to discuss this with me.

I get served lunch and it is a sandwich, an orange, and I take a glass of milk. I sit and eat alone after I am finished I head to my room to avoid everyone. I sit here for a few hours and then I hear a slight tap on my door. It isn't time for dinner yet, I hope it isn't Aries wanting to talk with me. I get up and open the door and see it is Finnick he looks better from earlier.

"Hi." I say to him.

"Hi." He says to me.

We just stand here for a few minutes looking at each other.

"Is there something you wanted?" I ask confused.

"Uh.. oh I wanted to see how your session went with Aries." He tries to sound serious but, can't keep his composure.

"It wasn't helpful and tomorrow I have to work on my _posture_." I smile and so does he at my mocking tone.

"You're pretty good at that, maybe that should be your talent." He smirks.

"Oh right that." I mutter.

"I saw your sketches they are pretty good." He says.

I roll my eyes. I chose drawing because that is the only thing that I could do that Aries acknowledged as a talent.

"Thanks but, you don't have to lie." I say.

"Don't downgrade yourself Annie, most of them are getting sold by Capitol citizens, they want you to do more." He says.

"Is that why you came to see me?" I ask.

"Well, yes and I wanted to see if you were alright after spending so much time with Aries."

"Oh, he wasn't as bad as he could've been."

"That's good. Here." He places a sketch book in my hands.

"Oh, I don't think-

"President Snow wants you to make more, apparently lots of Capitol citizens want an Annie Cresta original before people try and steal your signature." He smiles.

"I'm drawing landscapes, I don't think anyone can steal that signature. I think it has been done since the dawn of time."

He shrugs.

"I'm not art buff." He smiles.

"Do you have pencils or anything?" I ask him.

"Oh um..

"How am I supposed to draw something without any utensils?" I ask.

"Oh um, follow me." He grabs my hand and starts to pull me down the train halls.

"Where are you taking me?" I ask.

"You'll see." He says.

We stop at the end of the hallway in front of a machine.

"You brought me to a machine?" I ask confused.

"Just watch." He waves his hand over it and a menu comes up. "You can order anything you want." He presses the art button and a list comes up.

I scroll through it and see all kinds of fancy things that I would never be able to get my hands on in District Four.

"Ooo Charcoal. I have always wanted to draw with it but, they don't have it in District Four."

"Well, go crazy Cresta." Finnick teases me.

"I think I will and this gives me an idea as well." I order black charcoal, color charcoal, and the spray so it will stick. I also get colored pencils, regular pencils, thin and thick markers, and a larger sketch book.

"Now what?" I ask once I've selected everything.

Finnick presses some buttons and they start to come out of the machine.

"Woah cool. Where is it coming from?"

"The Capitol, I'm not sure how it works but you got what you needed." Finnick smiles.

We head back to my room and lay all the supplies out on the floor.

I know what I'm going to draw and I want to do it while it is still fresh in my mind.

"What are you going I draw?" He asks me.

"District Twelve and it will be even better with the charcoal." I smile.

Finnick watches me draw until I have finished, it has probably been a few hours.

"Is it time for the big reveal?" He asks.

"Tada." I say and show it to him "It isn't very good though." I say.

"Annie this could be a picture I see you left out the people though."

"I didn't want to remember their stares."

I drew my view from the Justice Building but not the people.

"You need more than this though."

"Wouldn't it be worth more if I had less drawings?"

"Well yes but that is why they can price them so high." He says

"Oh." I say.

"You should do two a day if you can." He says

"I will try." I look at Finnick and think of something.

"How much money do you think they would pay for a picture of Finnick Odair?" I say.

"Depending on how good it is a lot."

"That's what I was thinking, that way they can always see your pretty face." I tease.

"You're going to draw me?"

"Unless you have something better to do." I say.

"Not really." He says.

"Okay a portrait of Finnick Odair it is."I smile.

"Okay where do you want me Miss."

"It doesn't matter." I say. "But first I should wash my hands." I hold up my hands which are covered in charcoal.

"Yes don't want to smudge my pretty face." He teases.

"Oh no." I say sarcastically and smile.

"Yes." I say.

I press my hands on his face and the smear the charcoal on his cheeks.

"Ooo I actually like this it will make the picture more... abstract."

"Is that why you did this?"

"No but, it is a good excuse though." I smile.

I wash my hands and start to draw Finnick.

"So what happened earlier?" I ask him.

"What do you mean?" He asks confused.

"At lunch you-

"Oh that." He says annoyed

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked." I say and look at the sketch to avoid his gaze.

"No it's was just that marvelous Uncle of mine." He says and shakes his head.

"Oh, what's his deal?" I ask

"Well he says it is because of the my parents dying but he never liked me." He says.

"What makes you say that?" I ask him with disbelief.

"Because he has told me before. He thinks I ruined his sisters life or something." He rolls his eyes. "Me 'killing' them sealed the deal." He says.

"Does he hate Jason and Marci then?"

"No." He scoffs.

"Oh."

I'm sure there is a reason for this but I feel like I shouldn't ask. We sit in silence for a few minutes.

"They weren't married." Finnick says abruptly.

"What?" I say confused.

"My parents weren't married when I was born. They got married later when I was around one. My mom said she wanted to get married because she wanted to not because she had to."

"Smart, you shouldn't do something you don't want. No matter what people might say." I say.

He smiles.

"She was smart and independent but Michael couldn't see that. He also wasn't too keen on my Dad he hated him for some reason. I think it was because he thought she deserved better or something." He rolls his eyes. "But that doesn't matter, they loved each other and you can't help who you fall in love with." He says and smiles at me and I can feel myself blushing again.

"There, all done." I say.

He looks at me confused and then I show him the drawing.

"It looks like a picture." He says in disbelief.

"That's the point, I think I should still work on these tomorrow they need to be touched up."

"Well they look fine to me." I say.

"Well you are not the artist." I say.

A train attendant knocks on the door and says dinner is ready. We walk to dinner and eat. The whole time I am smiling at Finnick because he still has the charcoal on his face.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

"Alright everyone we will be in Eleven in an hour, Annie I think it's time for you to get ready." Aries instructs.

I sigh and get taken to Yule so he can show me my outfit.

The outfit is a staples floral print sundress that has a sweat heart neck line, he also has pink sandals for me to wear.

"Won't I be freezing in this?" I ask him confused.

"No, the weather here is different because it is in a different part of the country, it is almost never cold here." He says curtly. "Put that on and Dean and Diana will come to do your hair and makeup." He says and walks out the door. I must need more done to me if Dean and Diana are going to be doing something. I haven't seen them since we got on the train. I wonder where they are hiding, surely they have to come out and eat.

I put on the dress and it fits me like and glove and is surprisingly comfortable.

Dean and Diana come in Diana starts warming up a curling iron and Dean is starting to get makeup out of the bag.

"Is it a lot of work?" I ask them.

Diana rolls her eyes.

"No." She says.

"It's just a bit more than it was for Twelve. The longer the Victory Tour the more the prep work." Dean says nicely.

It still shocks me by how different they are. I wonder how they can work so close to each other.

By the time they are done my hair is in bouncy curls and I have flower like gems throughout my hair. My makeup isn't dramatic, my cheeks are a bright pink and they put sparkly eye shadow, mascara, and eyeliner on me.

Yule comes in to look to make sure I look good enough. He places his hand on my shoulder and then walks out.

"Is that good or bad?" I ask turning to Dean.

"He likes it Annie." He smiles.

I nod. I'm sure he would know and he has no reason to lie to me.

I walk out into the common room and can see everyone waiting for me.

"Annie you look wonderful!" Aries exclaims.

"Thank you." I tell him. I don't feel like a complete idiot so that is something.

I can feel the train start to slow and know we have reached our detestation Aries ushers us out onto the train platform. When I get outside I am surprised by how warm it is. It was snowy in Twelve and here it is probably eighty degrees. I look out and see a clear blue sky, and lots of fields of wheat and other plants, I am not familiar with. I can see people working in the fields and in every section there are many peackeepers. I also notice that they have a large fence that outlines the whole District. On the fence there are peacekeepers up above and they have guns pointing at the workers.

I swallow hard, why would they do this to people here, I wonder if something happened.

"Don't worry nothing will happen to you." I hear Finnick say.

"To us maybe." I say. I know he citizens from here can't have that guarantee.

Finnick doesn't say anything, we get taken to the Justice Building and the mayor is there already, we shake hands and he offers his congratulations. I nod but, don't say anything. I don't think I would be able to contain my disgust anyways.

I get taken to two large doors and I know when they open it will lead me to the stage where I have to say my little speech. I swallow hard at the thought already. I didn't kill anyone from here but, I know the citizens won't want to see me, even if I did spend most of my time in the arena crying they would rather want the people from their home to be up here.

"Take this." Aries says and shoves the speech card into my hand and before I know it I am being pushed outside on to the stage. I am surprised by how many people are in the square it is almost jam packed. I know from the size of this District this can't be everyone because District 4 is a rather large District. On reaping day the only people allowed to be in front of the Justice Building are the eligible tributes. Everyone else watches on the televised screens because their isn't enough room, I have a feeling it is the same here. For our Victory Tour they pick a part of the District and have them go to the Justice Building to see the new victor. That is what I'm thinking is happening here, although the people in Four have better living conditions and we don't look starving like these poor souls.

I walk to the microphone and clear my throat.

"Hello District Eleven, I would like to thank you for having me here today. I know the tributes from here would want to celebrate with us as well, they fought hard in the games and were courageous and I have the utmost respect for them because of this. I think we are all grateful for the Capitol for bringing us all together so we can share my victory _our _victory together." I say with no emotion in my voice. I memorized it this time so I could just focus my eyes else wear and not have to worry about looking up from the card to see all of them glaring at me. The mayor soon makes his outro and then I get taken back into the Justice Building.

We are ushered to a banquet hall to have the dinner celebration, I wasn't really conscious for this last time. I get seated at the head of the table and the other people who came with me sit around me, then everyone else is the important people from District Eleven. I don't know if I'm supposed to do anything so I just sit and push my food around, I don't know what I'm eating but, it tastes good.

People come up to talk to me but, I just nod and smile because I don't know what to say. The people here don't seem to hate me, maybe they are just good at hiding it or maybe they like me because I only killed two people and sat in the dark for almost the whole time.

We stay here for a few hours and then head back to the train, I just head to my room. I don't want Aries to tell me how wonderful I was or hear him complaining about how dull the celebration was. I just want to be alone and go to sleep.

I toss and turn but, sleep can't find me again. I get up off of the bed and decide to just head out to the common room. When I leave there is a strange lighting in the room it is almost tinted a red color. I don't question it, I haven't been awake on this train at this hour before. I start walking down the hallway and shivers run up and down my spine. One of the rooms door flys open and on the inside of the room I see someone tied down to a chair and screaming. I don't want to go in there so I just end up running away. I sit down on the couch trying to erase that memory from my mind. I hear someone whispering my name it is faint and the voice sounds familiar.

I get up and try to find the person searching for me. I get to the bar car and see them sitting there on the settee.

"Annie." I hear Dan say.

"What are you doing here?" I ask confused "You're...

"Dead." He snarls.

"Yes." I whisper and avoid his gaze.

"Don't worry you didn't kill me." He smiles.

'Oh... kay?" I say confused.

"I mean you didn't do this to me" He says and pulls off my head and throws it at me. I catch it in my hands his body falls to the ground and his blood and guts starts to fall out everywhere including on me.

"Annie, Annie." I hear someone say frantically. "Annie, wake up! Wake up!" I hear them shout.

I bolt up and I am shaking, I'm so terrified that I just hug the person who woke me up. I don't know who it is, maybe just a train attendant doing the rounds but, I don't care. I start sobbing hysterically and am getting my tears all over their shirt.

"It's okay Annie, it wasn't real." I'm too terrified to respond. I think Finnick is the person talking to me.

He holds me in his arms and makes shushing noises and strokes my hair. I finally stop crying and my eyes hurt and they want to close but, I'm too terrified to let that happen.

"I'm scared." I whisper.

"It's okay nothing is going to happen to you. It wasn't real."

"It felt real, I could feel his hot blood all over me." I say and start shaking.

"Whose blood?" Finnick asks me.

I just start crying.

"It's alright it doesn't matter." He tells me and strokes my hair.

"You're alright, it's okay." He tells me again.

"No, it's not." I whimper.

"Annie." He tells me.

I look up at him.

"You're alright, you were alright today in District Eleven as well. You're fine and we only have ten more stops, then it is back to District 4." He tells me gently.

"Finnick?" I sniffle.

"What?" He asks.

"They don't torture people on this train do they?" I ask.

"No, why would you ask that?" He asks me confused.

"I was walking down the hallway and saw someone or at least I think I was walking down the hallway... it could've been my nightmare." I start to feel dizzy and almost want to throw up.

"That didn't happen Annie it wasn't real, it was just a nightmare." He tells me gently.

I flop back down on the pillows by how dizzy I feel.

"Annie?" Finnick asks worried.

"I just... I don't feel good." I say.

"It's okay, let me get you some water." He tells me. He goes to the bathroom and comes out a few seconds later and hands me a glass of water. I take it but, my hands are shaking so badly that the water is spilling out of the glass and getting all over the sheets. Finnick takes it from my hand and places it on the night stand. I wouldn't have been able to drink it anyways. I lay on the bed and turn on my side, I expect Finnick to leave but, instead he lies next to me and keeps stroking my hair and telling me it will be alright. Tears dribble out of my eyes and fall onto the pillow and they keeping falling out even when my eyes are closed but, I eventually find sleep again.

* * *

I wake up and can feel someones arm around me I roll over and see it belongs to Finnick. I vaguely remember him coming in here last night to comfort me, I'm glad he didn't leave, I turn and careful not to wake him. I am inches an inches away from his face. He looks very peaceful and younger somehow. I wonder what he is dreaming about by the looks of it, it is something nice. I wish I could have peaceful sleeps like that, I doubt that will ever happen again.

I move slightly and Finnick's eyes blot open and he looks almost frightened, he looks around and realizes he is in the bed with him.

"Oh... Annie." He says and looks at his arm around me. "Sorry." He says and takes his arm off of me.

"It's okay." I smile at him. "I think I should be saying that to you."

"Why?" He looks at me confused.

"Because of the screaming, the crying." I say unable to meet his gaze.

He pulls my chin up to make me look at him.

"It's alright Annie." He says and rubs my back. "It doesn't matter, I don't care. You're stuck with me for the rest of your life remember." He smiles.

"I wouldn't say I'm stuck with you." I look at him and smile, he smiles back at me.

"You're right." He smiles.

I hug him and he wraps his arms around me I can feel his chest rising and falling and have that safe feeling again. I don't know what to say so I just stay here hugging him, I don't know for how long and don't care either. I get a strange feeling that he doesn't care either, that he wants me here.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

The rest of the Victory Tour has flown by and before I know it we are on the final train ride to the Capitol. I have been fine at the speaking part but, in the nighttime I am never alright, I always wake up screaming and Finnick usually ends up staying with me all night. I feel slightly embarrassed that someone needs to stay the night with me. The last time that happened was when I was seven and bad storms kept me awake, my parents would stay in the room with me until I was asleep. They would stroke my hair and tell me they loved me and that everything would be alright. It was a simpler time back then but, the safe feeling I had with them is the same thing I feel with Finnick. I swallow hard at what I think that might mean but, I can't think of that now.

I head out to the dining car to eat something.

"Annie good you're awake. I was getting worried that I would have to wake you." Aries says

"Well, here I am." I say.

I have been awake for hours sitting in the bed and leaning against Finnick crying. He left when I said I was alright but, I stayed in the room by myself for two hours. I think I am being a burden to Finnick but, I don't think I could've done this Victory Tour without him.

"Good once you are finished you will be seeing Diana and Dean, you have lots of work cut out for you today because the Capitol celebration is finally upon us." Aries says and his eyes are gleaming with excitement. I have a feeling after his breakfast he will be getting ready in the appropriate attire as well. Throughout the Victory Tour his hair has gotten lighter it is now a light teal opposed to the dark evergreen it was before.

I eat breakfast slowly and then head to the room that Diana and Dean will be, when I get in the room I see a ton of makeup sprawled out on the floor.

"Good god." Diana says when I enter the room.

"I'm sorry?" I say confused.

"Honestly Annie look at your appearance. Unkempt hair, dark circles under her eyes, and your eyes are bloodshot. You are supposed to be keeping yourself in tip top shape so you can shine like the star you are." Diana says annoyed.

"Don't worry Annie we can make you look even better than you do now." Dean says and winks at me.

I smile.

They start brushing my hair and putting various things in it. I can feel Diana tugging on it roughly and I don't think it is an accident. Dean is grabbing all sorts of makeup from the floor and putting it all over my face. I pick at spot on the wall and stare at it so I can ignore them and try to clear my thoughts.

I hear a door open and jump

"Annie!" Diana yells at me.

"What?" I say confused.

"You messed up the makeup by moving, I have to do this eye all over again." She says annoyed.

I roll my eyes.

"Don't roll your eyes at me Annie." She scolds

"It's fine Diana. She was just startled by Finnick coming in the room, it won't take long to redo it anyways." He smiles at me. I must say I like him a lot more.

"Finnick what are you doing here?" I ask.

"I wanted to see how it was coming, you've been in here for a while and I was confused by that." He says

"And why would you be confused by that." Diana asks annoyed.

"Because Annie is already pretty enough." He smiles.

"Isn't t that sweet Annie." Dean says.

"Yes, it is." I say and can feel myself blushing.

Diana sighs.

"Get out Finnick, you are making her blush and it is messing up her skin tone which means it will mess up her makeup." Diana snarls.

"My apologizes, I might check in later though."

"Just don't startle her again." Diana says.

Finnick smiles and pauses before he leaves and mouths 'Are you okay?'

I nod slightly, he smiles then walks out the door. It is probably two more hours before they have finished.

"There all done." Dean says. "Yule will be coming in with the dress shortly." He smiles and leaves the room while Diana sneers and shakes her head.

I sit in the room for a minute and then Yule comes in.

"Good they did a marvelous job." Yule says impressed. "Here." He says and gives me an outfit

"Now, you will need help getting into this because of the corset so disrobe when you are ready." Yule tells me.

I strip down to my underwear and slip the dress on. The outfit is a short blue dress that comes up to my mid thigh, the top is a see through corset with crystals on it. I see the shoes are silver high heels which will make walking interesting. I'm just hoping I can avoid people for most of the night.

Yule stands behind me and starts to lace the corset, he pulls very hard.

"This hurts."

"Beauty is pain." He says

"I don't think I will be able breathe."

"Well at least you will make a pretty corpse." He teases but I don't like it. By the time he finishes I can barely breathe and feel like I am drowning.

I look to the mirror to see how I look. The dress makes my waist seem very small and pushes my breasts up. I think about Snows deal and shiver because showing this much skin won't be helping me.

My hair is in an elaborate spiral braid that has crystals and blue flower woven into it. The braid is so tight I can feel my scalp getting sore makeup is just as ridiculous I look like an ice queen. I have crystals on my face and at the end of my false lashes which are blue. My lips and eyelids are a slight shimmery blue and my cheeks have a powder white blush on them.

I feel like an idiot but that means the Capitol citizens will love it. At this point though I don't think that is a good thing, I think that might seal a certain deal that has been haunting me for awhile.

"Don't forget the heels." Yule says and places them on my feet.

"Great I can't walk or breathe." I mutter.

"Well, try." He says and storms out.

I wobble out to the common room.

"Annie! You look so beautiful." Aries says.

"Thank you." I say.

Aries looks as ridiculous as I do he has crazy makeup on his face, it looks like someone splattered teal, blue, and white paint on his face. He is wearing an interesting tailor made suit that has very dramatic angles.

I am envious of Mags, Luna, and Finnick because they are wearing normal clothes. They were clearly made in the Capitol but, they don't look like complete idiots.

Finnick walks over to me.

"Here." He says offering his hand.

I look at it strangely.

"It looks like you will need help walking." He smiles.

"Thanks." I say.

"No problem." He whispers

"Do you have to see people?" I ask him.

"No, I'm here for you. However, I don't think that will stop people from wanting to dance with me." He smiles.

"There's dancing?" I groan.

"Yes, this is a party Annie." He smiles

"I can't dance especially in these shoes."

"Just take them off then."

"Is that allowed?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" He looks at me.

I smile.

The train slows and we exit the train station and there are tons of people waiting for our arrival. I ignore all of their screams and shouts and just get in the car that will take us to Snow's mansion.

We get to Snow's mansion and there are tons of people here, I think anyone who is important is here. There are also lots of colorful lights, many tables of food, a dance floor, confetti flying, and small fireworks going off.

Aries escorts us into the house and then leads us to the main party spot which is near the food tables and the dance floor. Finnick is holding my hand helping me walk through this madness but, I still wobble and almost topple over. I don't understand how Capitol citizens can walk and wear these things when they are so uncomfortable.

We get to the food table and I start grabbing things to eat because I haven't eaten all day and because it gives me an excuse to not dance with someone. Like Finnick said people dragged him away after we were here for ten minutes. I don't think he is allowed to say no to them, because I think he would rather be here with me.

I sit and stare and look at all of the people here having fun, they all have no grasp on reality. After everything I saw on this Victory Tour I never knew how good District Four had it. I knew we had it better than most Districts already but, I didn't know it was that bad.

I spot President Snow sitting on a balcony watching this glorious event take place, I get a shiver when I look at him. I see him whisper something to one of the guards next to him and he motions into the crowd.

A few minutes later the same person comes and is in front of me.

"Victor Annie, President Snow wishes to see you." He tells me.

"O-okay." I say. I slip off my shoes and give them to him.

"Hold these for now okay." I say.

"Of course Miss." He smiles. He leads me up a staircase and into President Snow's house. I get escorted to a room that is right outside from the balcony, I can see President Snow sitting in one of the chairs.

The guard leaves me so it is just him and I.

"Sit please Miss. Cresta." He tells me.

I do as I am told.

"So Miss Cresta how are you enjoying your celebration?"

"I-It's very festive." I say. I have a queasy feeling in my stomach about this.

"Yes well we do like these events." He smiles. "And lots of Capitol citizens like you Miss Cresta." He smiles crookedly.

I gulp. Looks like my fate is the same as Finnick's.

"That's nice." I say.

"Yes, now usually I would ask if you would want to spend some alone time with them but… you seem to be know to have lots of… outburst."

"I… I guess." I say. I wonder who told him this, maybe the train attendants

"I know the citizens here would want to see you before the next games but with your... outbursts it might be difficult to do. So there is going to be a time frame between now and then to see if people still want you after the Victory Tour ends. If you get your act together you can expect a call from me." He smiles at me.

"Oh." Is all I can muster. I know that he is talking about the deal that he has on Finnick. I don't want that but, to me it sounds like he doesn't think it will happen because of my _outbursts. _But just knowing he is considering this makes me feel sick.

"Well, I just thought I would tell you this Miss Cresta but, for now I think we should get back to your celebration."

"That sounds like a wonderful idea." I say.

I get escorted back downstairs and am given back my shoes. I don't bother putting them back on. I have a tight feeling in my chest and can't tell if it is the dress or the fear of what might happen to me. I can feel my eyes filling with tears just at the thought.

I feel a tap on my shoulder and jump. I turn around slowly and a tear escapes my eye.

"Annie?" Finnick says concerned.

Looking at him makes me want to cry more because I could be staring at my future. The girl who is beloved by the Capitol and gets any man she wants.

I turn around and walk away not wanting to talk with him because I know I will end up crying and I don't want that not now but, Finnick chases after me.

"Annie what is it, what did Snow want?" He asks but, I don't stop.

"Annie." He says and grabs my shoulder and turns me around.

"Why don't we dance?" He says gently.

"O-okay." I say confused.

He takes my hand and we head to the dance floor for the first few minutes he is just holding me close and I start to feel calm again.

"What did he want Annie?" He says but it sounds like he already knows.

"You already know, I might end up like you." I whisper and pull him closer to me and let my tears get on his shirt. I don't think anyone around us can tell I'm crying. I'm not doing it very loud and the commotion of the party is covering most of it.

"Shhh it's okay Annie." He says in a gentle tone and strokes my back. "We're going to be home soon."

"What does it matter that won't stop him from making up his mind. He could turn me into a product instead of a person in a blink of an eye, everyone will say there goes Annie Cresta the girl beloved by the Capitol." I say and more tears fall out of my eyes.

"It's alright Annie, it doesn't matter what happens you will still be alright." He pauses. "It's not an ideal life but, it could be worse." He tells me.

It doesn't seem like something could be worse then getting bought like something at an auction but, I'm sure he is right. After seeing the other Districts I think sleeping around with Capitol citizens is very lush compared to getting tortured by peacekeepers and dying from starvation.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

Lana is coming over later so we can talk about everything that has happened to her while I was on my Victory Tour.

I hear a knock on the door and am surprised with how quickly she has gotten here. I open the door but instead of Lana I see Finnick.

"Hi Annie." He says

Finnick has come back to visiting me everyday and it is usually more than a few minutes.

"Hi." I smile. He comes in and sits on the couch next to the fire.

We stare at fire and don't say anything for a bit just lost in the daze of the flames.

"You good today?" He asks me his eyes not leaving the fire.

"Yeah but I keep thinking about it." I say.

"Don't worry Annie you probably won't hear from Snow until the 71st Hunger Games."

"Gee so in a few months I will he able to know if I will be entrapped and that my loved ones are being threatened 24/7."

"It's okay Annie."

"You lie." I say in a mocking tone.

He smiles and rips something off and throws it in the fire and it starts to float out of the fire place and into the living area.

"Hey don't burn down my house you pyro." I tease.

"Sorry but doesn't it look pretty." He says

I nod and look at him sideways and smile at him.I lean my head on his shoulder and he wraps his arm around me.

"I like it when you come here." I whisper.

"I know." He says in a tone that sounds strange. He stands up quickly causing me to fall on the couch.

"Finnick?" I ask confused.

"Sorry I have to go." He says

"Where?"

"I uh…"

"Did I say something wrong Finnick?" I ask confused.

"No I just have to go, bye." He says and hurries out the door.

I sigh.

A few minutes Lana is here.

"Hey!" She says.

"Hey." I say.

"Look what I brought!" She says and holds up a two hugs of apple cider.

"Apple cider?" I say confused.

"Not just any apple cider Annie, hard apple cider."

"Oooo well aren't we fancy." I smile.

"C'mon lets sit by the fire and drink it."

I nod and we head to the fireplace.

"So what's with the face?" She asks taking a sip of cider.

"What face?"

"You have confused Annie face, what happened?"

"Before you were here Finnick came over to see me."

"He does that everyday day, what's the problem?" She asks confused.

"Well we were sitting on the couch and talking and I leaned my head against his shoulder and told him I liked when he came here. He then got up fast and practically ran out the door."

"Interesting." She says

"I know, what do you think it means?" I ask.

She smiles at me but, she looks sad.

"I think he is trying to tell you he doesn't like you, as in not the way you like him."

"So leaning my head against his shoulder is code for I like you?" I ask confused.

"I don't know how is mind works."

"Well I wish he would just tell me so I could stop wondering." I mutter.

"Well it doesn't look like that is the case." She says and pours me more cider.

"I'm also worried about me turning out like him because of Snow's deal." I say.

"What was he like when he told you?" She asks in a hushed tone.

"Who Finnick?" I ask confused.

"No, President Snow." She says

"Strange he doesn't look very threatening but, I know he could kill everyone I care about in the blink of an eye."

"Oh." She says

"Yeah so, you do anything while I was on my Victory Tour?" I ask changing the subject. I don't want to be reminded of Snow or his deal.

She looks down at the table and starts to pick her cuticles.

"What is it Lana?"

"I think I'm dating Jason." She whispers

"Wait what? What do you mean _think_ and I thought you didn't like him." I say confused and excited.

"Well I lied okay." She mutters but, I can see her blushing.

"Well what makes you think that you are dating?" I ask

"Well nothing official has been said but, the other day he kissed me Annie."

"You say slightly insulted that he did this." I say confused.

"I'm not it's just...

"You don't like him." I say.

"No it's not that it's..."

"What?"

"Well I know you like Finnck and all and I didn't want it to be weird."

I roll my eyes.

"He isn't Finnick."

"But that's his brother it's weird."

"It's only weird because you're making it weird." I say.

"There's something else though."

"What?"

"I don't know how to do this." She whispers.

"Do what?"

"Be in a relationship, I'm the casual girl I don't have relationships."

"I know. Why is that anyways?"

"I won't be able to get hurt." She says.

"Well you have to take the leap of faith I guess. I don't really know anything about Jason because I have never really had a conversation with him but, I'm sure he is nice."

"Better than nice." She smiles.

"Well there you go, you should talk about this with him not me."

"Don't worry I will."

We sit staring at the fire and I end up drinking more cider than I should have because before I know it my words are starting to slur.

"I mean why does Finnick think he is so great." I say.

"Annie I think you've had too much to drink."

"Does he not like me because he thinks I'm below him?" I ask.

I hear the door open and know it is my mother.

"Hello." She says when she see us.

"Hi mom!" I exclaim with glee.

"Annie, are you drunk." She says in a scolding tone.

"Yes, that's probably why I don't feel to good." I say.

"I should be going. Sorry Miss Cresta."Lana says and hurries out the door Lana stopped drinking hours ago but, I kept going. It's not like I have anything better to do.

"It's fine Lana." She smiles.

My mother doesn't care as much because it's legal but I know I will be having a discussion with her tomorrow about this.

My mother leads me towards my bedroom but ,I go to the bathroom and vomit because I was drinking so much.

Instead of going to get up I lay next to the toilet and cry. My mother comes in and wraps her arms around me.

"It will be alright Annie." She tells me and makes shushing noise.

"No it won't, I could end up being owned." I whisper

"Yes it will." She says and kisses my forehead. "It doesn't matter what happens to you. I will always be here for you. I don't care what will happen if you have to go to the Capitol I will still love you."

I realize I'm not crying because I might be enslaved by Snow. I'm crying for a different reason. I think my drunk state is finally letting everything go.

"No not that." I say.

"What's it then Annie?." She asks

I start sobbing.

"Annie you're okay, you're safe here with me." She says and kisses my forehead.

I sit here crying for a few minutes.

"Why don't we take you to bed." She says

"I love him." I say abruptly through sobs.

"Annie?" She says confused.

"What did I do? I thought he liked me." I sob.

"Oh Annie." She says with compassion. I think she knows I'm talking about Finnick.

"It's okay." She says

I don't say anything I just keep crying.

"Sometimes things don't work out the way you think." She whispers in my ear.

"But, I'm in love with him." I whisper.

"You can't make someone fall in love with you." She says gently. "It will be okay." She says and kisses my forehead

I cry here until I fall asleep and I'm not thinking about Snow's deal. I'm thinking about Finnick and wondering what I did wrong that would cause him not to like me.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22.**

I get up and am somehow in my bed. The last thing I remember I was on the bathroom floor sobbing because Finnick didn't like me. I cringe at the memory, not because it was scarring but, because of how pathetic it is. I am not that girl. I am not that girl who gets drunk and then cries about some guy. I am not that girl whose whole falls apart because the guy she likes doesn't like them. I am not that girl but, last night I was. I don't know if it was the alcohol, talking about Snow, or Lana talking about Jason. It could've been all three or it could've been because I thought he wanted me on the Victory Tour. Now, I just want to forget the memory of last night. Finnick is my friend and hopefully he always will be, he keeps saying I'm stuck with him for life but sometimes I wonder if he actually means it.

I walk downstairs slowly I have only been hungover two times before this. The first time I didn't realize I was drinking alcohol because it was put into food and when alcohol is in food it's hard to judge how you have had anyways. The second time was when Lana and I were drinking stronger alcohol then we realized and were completely gone after two drinks. This time I think I just did it subconsciously trying to chase my troubles away. I shouldn't be using a substance to do that and I probably never will again. I dont' like drinking that much anyways.

I get to the kitchen and see my Mom cooking I pray she is making pancakes, that always makes me feel better when I'm hungover.

I sit down at the kitchen contour.

"Good morning Annie." She places a glass of water in front of me which I gulp down. "How are we today?" She smiles.

"I've been better."

She smiles.

"Do you want to talk about it now or later?" She smiles.

"I know I shouldn't drink this much but-

"I wasn't talking about that Annie, you don't do this very often and I don't think you will start doing it all the time."

"Oh, then what were you talking about?" I ask.

She places pancakes in front of me and gets me more water.

"I don't know maybe the reason you were sobbing on the bathroom floor. The most disturbing thing about that is I don't think I have ever cleaned the bathroom."

"Great." I mutter.

I eat the pancakes and she stares at t me.

"Did something happen?" She asks.

"No, that's the problem." I mutter.

"Oh, well you won't get what you want by just sitting on your butt all day Annie Cresta. If you want Finnick then go get him."

"But you don't understand." I mutter.

"Annie, unless he has stated that he does not want anything to do with you then there is still hope. Has he said he doesn't want anything to do with you."

"No but-"

She sits next to me and places my hair behind my ear and I look at her.

"Annie, you can get whatever you want in life but, you have to go after it."

"Well, what if I'm tired of going after it, what if I'm tired of trying."

"Well, then you shouldn't be sobbing so much about some boy. If I recall Annie, you are not one of _those _girls." She smiles because I have said these exact words to her before.

I roll my eyes.

"I'm not, or at least I thought I wasn't. I think I should just let Finnick be my friend."

"Whatever you want Annie." She kisses my forehead. "But I don't want you to come home sobbing about how he doesn't love you, if you just want him to be your friend."

"That's all he is and that is all he will ever be unless-

"Unless?" My Mom asks intrigued.

"Unless he does something about it." I smile.

"Alrighty then." She smiles "Wat the rest of your pancakes and probably lie down. I will be leaving soon and there is supposed to be a big snow storm. I may just stay in the old house because it is closer to our shop okay sweets." She says

"Okay, I love you mom be careful though." I tell her.

"I will Annie, I love you too." She hugs me and then heads out the door.

I finish my pancakes and then head to the couch and lie down. I stay here for probably an hour but, it is too stuffy in this house and I figure the cool breeze will help with my mushed brain.

I get up and head outside the air is cold but, it is helping my mushed brain. I get close to the exit of Victors Village but, before I exit I slip on a patch of ice and fall flat on my back.

"Ouch." I mutter.

"Annie!" I hear Finnick shout off in the distance. He gets to me relatively quickly.

"Are you alright?" He asks me concerned.

"I think so." I say.

He helps me get up and I almost fall back down.

"Why don't we move over here." He smiles.

"Were you going somewhere?" He asks me.

"No, I was just going for a walk to clear my head." I say.

He looks at me strangely.

"What?" I say confused.

"You look hungover." He tells me.

"Oh well I am it's not as bad as it was earlier."

He smiles.

"Why were you drinking?"

"Because Lana brought some hard apple cider and I forgot it had alcohol in it so I ended up getting really _really _drunk." I smile.

"Oh." He say.

"Come on Finnick like you've never gotten drunk before."

"Not really."

"Really you're almost twenty and you've never been drunk."

"Well, if you would have been around Haymitch since you were fourteen I think you would see why."

"That's the victor for Twelve right?"

"That's the one." He smiles.

"So he's like an alcoholic because of 'winning'." I say.

"That is probably the reason." He says.

"Sad." I say.

"Well, no one ever really leaves that arena. We are all still battling with one another." He says.

"I guess." I say.

"Do you want company on your walk?" He asks me.

"Well, if I fall down again it would be nice to have someone catch me." I smile.

"I'll take that as a yes." He says and I lace my arm with his.

We walk for a short amount of time, when it starts to snow we head back to the village. Iit is very windy and Finnick suggests I come into his house because of the weather conditions. He doesn't think I should be alone in case something happenes and I don't argue with him.

Finnick starts a fire and we sit here for a few minutes staring at the fire and getting warm.

"I'll be right back." He says and gets up and heads to the kitchen.

I sit in front of the fire staring at the flames and am almost in a trance but, am awoke by it when the door opens.

"Annie!" I hear Marci exclaim with joy.

I turn around and see Marci she has snow all over and it is laced in her hair.

"Hi Marci why don't you sit by the fire and get warm." I tell her. I know she is cold I am cold just looking at her.

Jason comes over here as well and sits next to Marci and they strip off their winter jackets.

"Where's Finnick?" He asks me.

"In the kitchen." I reply. He nods and gets up probably to talk to him.

"It's like a blizzard out there Annie." She tells me.

"I'm sure it is."

"Some of the town lights keep flickering off and on. Uncle Michael almost didn't want us to leave but his phone wasn't working and he knew Finnick would worry about us."

"Well that was very considerate." I say truthfully.

She nods and I get a blanket and wrap it around her and she gets into the fire trance as well.

I can hear them coming out of the kitchen.

"Here Marci." Jason says and gives her a mug. Finnick give one to me as well.

I take a sip and realize it is hot coco.

"I can't remember the last time I had coco." I tell him truthfully.

"Seriously Annie?" Marci says slightly offended.

"That's one of the things you are supposed to do in the winter." She says.

"Yes, didn't you know." Finnick teases.

I roll my eyes at him

"What else is on the list?" I ask Marci.

"Ice fishing, ice skating, snowman building, snow angels, cookies, the winter solstice, and the winter carnival."

"What about the winter wonderland festival?"

The winter wonderland festival is the romantic festival of the season. They all have one except summer which has many. The festival is more or less a dance but they still have fun things you can do.

"Annie that is a romantic festival. I have no time for romance in my life at the moment." She says proudly.

"Why is that?" Finnick asks her.

"I have better things to do than find a boy that will distract me."

"Like what?" Jason laughs.

"Other stuff." She says

"It's okay Marci they don't understand." I tell her.

"Have you been to the winter wonderland festival?" She asks me.

"Yes." I say.

I was probably fifteen Ben Nell asked me to go with him and I was very excited. I wore my sparkly white dress because for this festival you are suppose to look nice. Something white or blue for the girls and the guys just have to look nice. I put crystals in my hair to make it look like snow.

Ben showed up and we danced and did the events for the evening. We stayed until it was over then he walked me home and gave me my first kiss. It may sound cliche but it was nice. The next day I ran and told Lana and we talked and giggled about it for hours.

"Really." Marci says excited.

"Really?" Finnick says and I can detect jealously.

"Yes, really." I say.

"Was it nice?"

"What happened to I don't care about this." Jason teases her.

"I don't care." She says but I think all of us know she does care. She wants a nice boy to ask her to the festival.

"But to answer your question Marci it was nice."

Marci crawls over to me.

"Did you dance underneath the stars."

"Yes that's kind of the main part of the festival Marci."

She nods.

"Did you wear white or blue?"

"A nice sparkly white dress I can show you sometime." I tell her and she looks very happy when I say this.

"Did he kiss you?" She whispers. I think she wanted only me to hear this but, I can tell Finnick heard her question because he is looking at me intently.

"Yes."

I can again detect jealously in Finnick's eyes but, if he wants to kiss me so badly I don't understand why he just doesn't do it. He has been presented with many opportunities and I have tried to kiss him more than once he should know I'm interested in him.

She nods.

"Do you want a boy to kiss you Marci." I ask loud enough for both of her brothers to hear.

"No as I said I don't have time for that in my life." She says proudly.

"Good you're too young for that anyways." Jason says

"Excuseee me I am 13." She says

A siren interrupts the conversation and a voice follows and says.

_District 4 weather conditions are severe you must stay inside until further notice. If you try to leave there will be consequences._

"Consequences?" Marci says confused.

"It's probably nothing Marci." Finnick tells her gently but, I have a feeling if you would go outside you would get punished by some peacekeepers.

"Can I use your phone?" I ask Finnick. I want my mother to know I'm alright.

"If it is still working the storm has been messing with it."

He takes me to the kitchen and I dial the phone and my mother answers. She figured I was here but appreciated the phone call.

"Looks like I'm here until further notice." I say.

"Don't worry I don't care." He says.

"Thanks I think."

"So you went to the winter wonderland festival."

"Once when I was fifteen."

"I see."

"You're telling me you've never been to that festival." I mock.

"No I haven't." He says

"Really? not even before you won."

"What does that matter?" He asks confused.

"Because I'm sure even then you could have your pick at any girl you wanted."

"Well... not every girl." He says.

I gasp "Someone turned down Finnick Odair." I tease.

"Ha ha very funny but, yes someone did turn me down." He says

"How unfortunate but, that was only one year."

"Well after I won I didn't want to go because I thought they wanted the Finnick Odair the people in the Capitol loved."

"God you're stupid, you know if you didn't have the alter ego Finnick on all the time more people here would like you." I tell him.

He shrugs and starts to walk over to me.

"Once you've been doing it for so long it's hard to stop."

"You don't do it around me."

"Because you told me not to." He says

"I did say that didn't I." I smile

He is right next to me now and looking into my eyes and his hand is touching mine on the counter. I feel him move closer slightly.

I get startled when Jason opens the kitchen door.

Finnick takes his hand off of mine and steps away a little.

"Was I interrupting?" He asks and eyes Finnick strangely.

"No we were just talking." Finnick says.

He nods.

"Marci wanted more hot chocolate." He says

Finnick gets it and hands it to him then Jason leaves.

I head back out as well and sit near the fire for awhile until it is just myself and Finnick awake.

"Do you want me to show you to your room?" He asks.

"I can just stay on the couch Finnick." I say.

"There are four bedrooms Annie." He says

"I know our houses are exactly the same."

"Then why don't you want one."

I shrug.

"I'm fine with the couch." I tell him again

"Alright I'm going to sleep then." He says

"Have nice dreams and all that jazz."

"I'll try." He says and then heads up stairs.

I stare at the fire for a few more minutes and then head to the couch to fall asleep.

* * *

I'm still sleeping at Finnick's house from the bad snow storm. I am somewhere between asleep and awake. I can tell I'm in Finnick's living room on the couch but I feel hazy.

I can hear foot steps.

"Shh she's still asleep." I hear Finnick say.

"She have nightmares?" I hear Jason ask.

"No, neither did Marci." He says

"I know you did." Jason says sadly.

"Did you hear me screaming?" He asks

I didn't know Finnick had nightmares. I was with him for a whole month on the Victory Tour and didn't hear anything.

"Maybe." Jason says sadly. "Don't apologize." He says before Finnick gets the chance.

"Fine." He says.

It's silent. I can tell one of them is looking at me.

"You ever gonna tell her?" I hear Jason ask

"Tell her what?"

"You know what."

"No I don't." He says with an edge that makes me think he does know.

Jason sighs.

"I think you would've last night in the kitchen if I didn't interrupt.

"I have no idea what you are talking about." Finnick says

"Finnick come on."

"Come on what?" He says annoyed

"You know what... Annie."

"What about her?" He says

"That you're in love with her." He says

"I'm not..."

"Fine whatever you need to tell yourself." He says

"I...

"Even if you don't love her let me just say this, no matter what happens in this messed up world you have to get rid of the fear and doubt. You should be doing everything you can to be with the one person who makes it all worth it, because when you find the one you don't give up. You love Annie Finnick... I think you always have." Jason says.

I hold my breath to hear Finnick's response but he doesn't say anything.

It's silent for a few minutes and I hear Jason sigh.

"She won't wait for you forever." Jason says.

Someone leaves the room and someone sits in the chair next to me. I keep my eyes closed to make it look like I didn't hear their conversation but I can't help but wonder if what Jason said is true. That Finnick has always loved me.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

It's been a few weeks since I overheard Jason talking with Finnick. I didn't let him know that I heard the conversation but, it has always been in the back of my mind ever since. I knew I said I wouldn't run after Finnick unless he came to me but, I don't think I can do that anymore. I go to Finnick's house and knock on the door but Marci answers. She has fresh tears on her face.

"Oh... Hi Annie."

"Hi Marci. What's wrong?"

"It's my birthday."

"Then why are you sad?"

"Because my parents haven't shown up yet. They were supposed to be here by now from there fishing trip."

"Marci." I say not knowing what to tell her.

"What?" She asks confused.

"Marci." I see Finnick come behind her.

"Where are Mom and Dad Finnick why aren't they home yet?" She says.

Finnick looks at her sadly

"Marci remember what we told you Mom and Dad aren't coming back."

"Why not." She says with tears running down her face.

"There was an accident, they got hurt badly. Marci they died three years ago."

"No!" She shouts "Tell me where they are!"

"Marci, they aren't here anymore." He says and runs his hand through her hair.

"No you're lying Finnick!" She says and pushes him away.

"I wish I was Marci." He tells her and I can see tears forming in his eyes.

"No!" She says and runs from the house.

"Marci wait!" Finnick says

Finnick runs after her.

I follow him, I want to talk to Marci. She is sitting near the pond at the entrance. Finnick is about to run over to her but I grab his wrist. He looks at me strangely.

"Can I talk to her."

"Okay." He says

I go over and sit next to her.

"Marci you're okay."

"Why is he lying to me."

"Marci when I was your age my father was out fishing when there was a terrible storm. He didn't make it back because he died."

"That's sad but that didn't happen to my parents." Marci says.

"When my mom told me I didn't want to believe her. I kept thinking my dad would walk through the front door but he didn't. After a few months I came to the conclusion that he wasn't coming back." I look at Marci and her chin is trembling.

"I accepted what happened and moved on, and was thankful that my mom was still here with me. Marci you have to accept what happened, you need to move on. You still have Finnick and Jason and your Uncle. They all love you very much and your parents will always be remembered." I tell her gently

"No they are going to come back." She whispers

"Marci they aren't coming back." I tell her gently.

"No!" She says.

She gets up and runs towards Finnick.

"Why is everyone lying to me Finnick?"

He looks like he wants to tell her that we are lying.

"Marci they…"

Jason is heading into the village now.

"Happy birthday Marci." He says but when he gets closer his expression changes. She runs over to him.

"Jason, Finnick and Annie are lying to me."

"About what?" He asks but I can tell he knows what she is going to say.

"That Mom and Dad are dead and not coming back."

"Marci why don't we go for a walk." He tells her.

She sniffles

"Okay." He takes her hand and they leave the village.

"Where is he taking her?" I ask Finnick

"To where they were buried." He says "This has happened every year since they have died. She cries and thinks everyone is lying to her then Jason takes her to see them. She then realizes they are dead and cries the whole day but, when she wakes up tomorrow her mind will reset like nothing happened. She will still think they are on some fishing trip."

"Why is that?"

"I don't know." He pauses "Why did you come to my house?"

"Oh I just wanted to see what you were doing."

He looks at me strangely and then looks off in the distance

"Fantastic." I hear him say annoyed.

I turn around and see his uncle.

"Hello Finnick where is Marci?" He says happily.

"With Jason he…"

He sighs

"Taking her to see your parents like every year."

"Yes." He grumbles

"Well this wouldn't have to happen if you didn't kill them." He says.

"I… I… didn't do anything." He says but, sounds unsure.

"Yes you did and now you get to go and do whatever you wish in the Capitol. Even though you say someone is forcing you, I don't believe it. You like it and you like being a victor."

"No I don't." I say

"Don't lie." He says.

His uncle shouldn't say this he has no idea what it's like to be a victor and he shouldn't judge. I bet Finnick is trying to save him as well.

"I'm not lying and I wish I would've said yes to Snow's deal at first or better yet I wish I would've died in that arena then they would still alive."

"Finnick." I whisper. He shrugs when I say this. He shouldn't be thinking that.

"Finnick your parents always had the upright respect for you and treated you like the best thing ever. I never understood why though. I will admit you are just like your mother."

"Stop." Finnick says angrily. I don't know why this would makes him angry.

"She was like you going from person to person and never going back to the same one until your father and it wasn't because she loved him. It was because of you, that's why they got married not the love story they told Marci. She could've done worse I will admit. She was my sister and I loved her but she didn't have very high morals or standards. She was too young. All you are Finnick is a mistake."

I look at Michael with shock and disgust I look at Finnick and he doesn't seem surprised by this I wonder how many times his uncle has told him this. Even though his mother did get pregnant unmarried that doesn't make him a mistake. I obviously didn't know his parents but I think they loved all of their children more than air especially, with how close his brother and sister are with each other. That closeness wouldn't just develop because their parents died it is deeper than that. Especially Marci's relationship with her brothers.

"Finnick!" I hear someone say in a kind tone. It is an older woman probably late sixties. She has similar features as Finnick.

She walks over here and looks at Michael and Finnick.

"There's my favorite grandson."

"Now Gran don't let Jason hear you say that." He smiles and hugs her. He seems alright but his voice is shaky

"I say the same thing to him."

"Then you're a liar." He teases.

"Mother what are you doing here?" Michael says annoyed.

"It is my granddaughters birthday and I wanted to see her. I'm allowed to leave for family occasions."

She looks at Finnick again. He still looks effected by what his uncle said to him.

"What did you do?" She says looking at Michael

"Nothing Mother." He grumbles.

"Is this true Finnick." She asks him gently and looks concerned.

"It's fine Gran." He tells her.

"Okay." She says but doesn't sound convinced.

She turns to me

"And who is this gem?" She smiles at me.

"That's Annie Gran." Finnick says

"_The_ Annie." She says

"Am I famous or something?" I smile.

"Finnick always talks about you when he visits"

"Gran." He says as if asking her to stop talking.

"Although you are far prettier than Finnick led me to believe." She smiles

"You say when Finnick visits do you live further away." I ask. She seems nicer than Michael. I think she would do a better job looking after Marci and Jason and wouldn't emotionally abuse Finnick either.

"No, would you like to tell her why Finnick visits me Michael."

"Mother..." Michael says shaking his head

"You see Annie, my dear my son over there had me put away in a home soon after Finnick's parents past. Even though I was appointed custody if something ever happened to them unless, of course I wasn't see fit, then he would be appointed as their guardian."

"Mother you didn't even know your last name."

"Well that may be true but there is one thing I will never forget and that is that my own son locked me up in a home and took away my grandbabies when they needed me most." She says coldly and I can see Finnick stifling a smile.

"Where is the birthday girl?" She asks

"With Jason." Michael says and glares at Finnick.

"Oh I see well why don't you go and fetch them and I can stay here with Annie. We can get to know each other." She smiles at me.

"But Mother." Michael objects

"Did I say if it pleases you?" She scolds.

"No." He grumbles

"Then get going and try not to kill one another." She says and looks at Finnick gently. It looks like she knows how Michael is.

They head out of the village but keep a safe distance from one another.

"Let's go into his house." She says and we do and get comfortable on the couch.

"Let me just look at you." She smiles "Oh Annie it just occurred to me that I know your name but you don't know mine it's Pearl."

"It's nice to meet you." I tell her.

"You as well.

"So, Annie what they were talking about before I came up."

"I…

"Don't lie Annie I know my son, he was saying something to Finnick probably something cruel. I don't know what happened to make him so cynical. It seemed to come out after Finnick's parents died. So tell me what did he say." She says

"Well… he kept saying that it was Finnick's fault for his parents dying and that Finnick was a… mistake."

"To call that man my son is embarrassing." She says shaking her head. "It isn't what he made it sound Annie. Finnick's mother only had one love that was her husband. The only reason he thinks she was with every male from District 4 is because she got pregnant unmarried and at the age of twenty. She was already very dependent. She had her own house and could take care of herself. She had a great deal of money too so she wasn't in any finical bind. She could've easily cared for a child by herself."

"Money at twenty?" I say surprised.

"She took every dollar she was given since she was young and would invest them into things. She could easily turn five dollars into five thousand if she did her research. Felicity was smart, gentle and uncommonly kind. She put her needs before everyone else's. She was a good person Annie." Pearl says and her eyes are glazed over with tears. I wonder what my mother would say about me if I was dead.

"I'm sure she was." I say.

"But, Michael thought Felicity deserved better than James because he came from a poor family of merchants but, that doesn't define a person. James was nice and kind and treated Felicity with respect. He also made her very happy, she described it as floating on air happy. Although Michael thought he wasn't good enough myself and my husband knew he was the one for her.

"How did you know?" I ask.

"He brought out the best in her and always had the brightest smile on her face while she was with him or talking about him." She pauses. "Finnick has the same smile when he talks about you. That is the only thing Michael is correct about."

"What's that?" I ask

"That Finnick is just like his mother. He has her looks, her brains, and is also uncommonly kind. Though he isn't allowed to be this person most of the time it is still there and rather obvious at times. I think you have seen that in Finnick already though." She turns to me and smiles.

"That does sound correct." I say.

"Yes but while Finnick is very much like his mother he has one undesirable trait from his father."

"What would that be?" I ask confused.

"He lacks courage." She looks at me.

"But he's a victor he...

"Yes well… throw in an arena to fight to the death and he won't bat an eyelash but make him talk to a pretty girl." She smiles at me "He will be as shaky as a leaf on a tree."

"But, he goes to the Capitol, he talks with them all the time."

"Well... yes but, he is made to do to that and he doesn't care about them. Not like he cares about you." She smiles.

"Oh..."

"He loves you Annie. I don't know in what way but he cares for you deeply."

"He told you this."I say surprised. He can tell his grandmother but not me.

"He didn't have to." She smiles.

"Oh but if that is true why won't he say anything." I say frustrated

"Because he is afraid. He is very concerned about getting close to people because of Snow's deal. Which is why I was surprised when he started talking about being with someone new." She smiles.

"But, then why when I try and tell him he just backs away or changes the subject." I tell her.

"He might not realize it yet or doesn't want to admit it to himself. He isn't used to being close to others and he is still afraid Snow will hurt you."

"But, Snow has already hurt me." I mutter.

Pearl looks at me with compassion.

"I know, he has hurt everyone but the victors get the worst of it." She smiles and rubs my shoulder

I hear the clock chime and know I should be going. I told Lana I would be visiting her today.

"I'm so sorry Pearl but, I have to go."

"Alright it was nice to meet you Annie."

I get up and head to the door.

"Oh and Annie don't give up on him. Be more forward next time you speak with him." She tells me.

"I will do just that Pearl." I smile and walk out of his house.

Finnick's grandmother and brother have told me Finnick loves me in this month so I guess something is there and it wasn't in my head.

Finnick's grandmother is very sweet. If Michael didn't lock her away I think things might be very different. I don't understand how someone can be so cruel to members of their family.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

It seems like the snow just hit the ground but, it already gone and the weather is sunny and warm again. It is now summertime in District Four and tomorrow will be my favorite festival: the flower festival.

I'm walking back from Lana's house and walk slowly so I can be engulfed in the warm air, sun, the smell of flowers, and sea salt. I make my way back into the village but, don't want to go to my house yet so I head to the fountain and sit on the edge. I let the water spurt onto me and I just enjoy the nice weather and stare at the crisp blue sky and fluffy white clouds.

"Annie" I hear Finnick say.

I look and pat the space next to him and he sits.

"Yes?" I ask.

"Do you have plans for tomorrow?" He asks

"Well nothing really I was thinking of going to the flower festival. It is my favorite festival."

"I know, you have told me that before." He smiles. "You're going with Lana then?"

"Well nothing has been carved into stone but, that was the plan. Why?"

"Well do you think she would mind if I took you instead."

"You want to take me to the flower festival." I say surprised.

"Yes, unless you want to go with Lana."

"No, like I said nothing was carved in stone. I will go with you."

"Good that's good." He smiles "Why don't we meet at the fountain around five it will give us plenty of time before the release of the petals." He smiles.

"Okay, I'll get my chisel."

"What?" He looks at me confused.

"To crave it into stone. Ha ha." I smirk.

"Oh." He smiles and rolls his eyes.

"Too much?" I tease.

"Everything about you is too much but, in a good way."

* * *

I head down to the fountain so Finnick and I can go to the flower festival. I sit down at the side of the fountain and wait for him. I run my fingers through my braid it has flowers woven into it just for the flower festival. Lana and I have done it since we were little and it goes with the theme of the day.

"Annie." He comes over and smiles.

"Hi."

"Your hair is very festive today." He smiles.

"Thanks, I do it every year."

"It looks nice." He smiles.

"Thanks, it's easy to do because of the weaving things."

"I know because I can braid my sisters hair." He smiles and holds out his hand "Shall we."

I take it and we walk hand and hand into town. I'm getting a feeling that this is a date but, I'm not going to assume anything because with Finnick it could be anything.

"When's the last time you've gone to this?" I ask him.

"I can't remember." He says.

"Well, I go every year."

"I used to go with my parents." He says.

I stop walking.

"We don't have to go then Finnick if this will bring up bad memories." I say.

"No, I want to go with you." He smiles and his eyes are gleaming with joy.

"Okay." I say.

We get to the beach and see flowers everywhere the mayor walks to stage and gives the same speech he gives every year. Then they chime the bells and release flower petals. They land everywhere and it looks like it is raining beautiful colors.

Then Finnick and I sit on the beach and watch day turn to night.

"I like the nighttime here." Finnick says.

"Why?"

"Because you can see the stars. You can't see them in the Capitol and they bounce off of the ocean and it makes it seem...

"Prefect." I say.

"Yeah perfect." He smiles.

"That's not the only thing I can't see when I'm at the Capitol." He says and looks at me strangely. I think he might be implying me but... I think I am just reading into it.

"Do you miss that too?"

"Yes." He smiles.

I feel myself moving closer to him and I hold his hand. He looks at me and smiles. He has a nice look in his eyes they are shining with happiness.

"We should head back before it gets too dark." He smiles.

"Okay." I nod.

We walk back hand in hand until we get to the street that is in the middle of our houses.

"I guess this is goodnight." He tells me.

"Yeah." I say.

"I'll see you later Annie." He tells me and starts to walk back to his house.

"Finnick?" I say. I want to ask him if this was a date but, I don't want to ruin anything.

"Yeah." He says and turns around smiling.

"Are you doing anything tomorrow?" I ask him. I spend time with him anyways so it isn't that strange. I feel if I spend more time with him I will be able to figure out what tonight was.

"No. Why?"

"I need help with finding things to draw I'm supposed to bring stuff to the Capitol. You go there so much I figure...

"I'd be happy to help you Annie." He says and walks back over here.

He smiles at me and runs his fingers over my hair, and ilooks me in the eyes. I feel I should say something but he takes my hand and kisses it.

"Goodnight Annie."

"Until tomorrow." I say.

He goes into his house and I head to mine.

* * *

I hear a knocking on my door and assume it is Finnick to help me with my drawings, I don't really need his help but, I wanted to see him again.

"Hi, Annie are you ready?" He asks me.

"Yes."

"Let's go then." He says and holds out his hand. I take it and he is leading me out of the village.

He takes me to the pond in front of Victors Village.

"A nice landscape." I smile.

"Ah yes, an Annie Cresta original." He mocks.

He nods and I start sketching.

"Why are you so good at this?" He asks me looking over my shoulder.

"Dunno, it's just one of those things. What was your talent for the Victory Tour anyways?"

"Weaving." He says

"I'm sure anyone from District 4 could have that as their talent." I smile.

"Well, since it was coming from the great Finnick Odair it was different." He teases.

He picks up a lavender water lily and gives it to me.

"Thank you, these are my favorite."

"I know, you have mentioned it before."

"And you remembered?" I say surprised.

"I remember small details that I find interesting."

"Interesting?" I smile.

"Yes." He chuckles softly.

The sun starts to go down and know I should be getting back home so my mother doesn't worry.

"I should get back." I tell him.

"Okay." He tells me. "It was nice to see you Annie." He leans in and I think he is going to kiss me but he just strokes my hair instead.

"It was nice seeing you Annie." He says again.

I feel myself getting angry. I finally thought we were on the same page. After the things I've over heard and the actions both of us have taken I thought this was finally it. Maybe everyone was wrong, maybe Finnick doesn't love me and we are all idiots.

"That's it?" I blurt out. I sound shocked and annoyed.

"What's it?" He asks confused.

"You ask me to the flower festival and we go and have a nice time, then I ask to see you tomorrow and you agree. We sit here at the pond and have a nice day and then you get up and pat my head like I'm a dog."

"I'm sorry?" He says confused.

"Come on Finnick you knew what you were doing, you knew what I was doing."

"Well… it wasn't official or anything." He says

"Wasn't official!" I practically shout at him.

"You didn't say anything official Annie I-

I interrupt him I don't care what excuse he was going to give me this time. I'm tired of waiting for him and he is going to hear this whether he wants to or not.

"But we both did things, said things that made it pretty obvious what was going on here. I mean I thought finally _finally_ we were on the same page!" I'm shouting at him by how frustrated I am with him.

"Annie just calm down." He says.

"No! I don't want to calm down! I thought everything was going fine but, now you're standing there looking at me like I'm... crazy and making me think it was all in my head."

"Annie I'm not looking at you like you're crazy."

"I mean when you walked me home last night there was a moment... well I thought there was a moment." I say.

It is silent for a few minutes Finnick and I are having a stare off. It doesn't look like he is going to say anything. I get up and start to walk back to my house but, after I take a few steps Finnick grabs my arm and I turn around.

"There was." Finnick says and I look at him confused.

"There was a moment." He says.

We look at each other and I lean in but he backs away.

"What are you doing?" He says.

"Just stand still." I say and kiss him and it is like electricity is running all over my body. He breaks the kiss and touches his lips and leans in.

"What are you doing?" I ask him and back away.

"Just stand still." He smiles and kisses me. This time it is with more passion. I let my fingers run through his hair and he wraps his arms around me and pulls me closer. I never want him to let go but he breaks the kiss. I rest my forehead against his and he puts his hands on my cheeks. I look into his famous green eyes and we are both are smiling like idiots.

"I love you." We both whisper in unison and kiss again.

I'm in love with Finnick Odair like most of the woman in the Capitol but, the difference is that he loves me back and that this love is real. It's not some shallow thought that I have just because he is pretty. I love the real Finnick the idiot from District 4.

**A/N: Yay! They finally kissed! I hope it was worth the wait! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing.**


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

"What's with you?" Lana asks.

"What?" I say with a smile.

"You ...that giddy look. You look very happy."

"Well sorry." I say.

She rolls her eyes. "What is it?" She asks

"Finnick and I kissed." I say.

"Finally, I thought that was never going happen. Jason was getting weary too he thought Finnick was either to stupid or too afraid."

"That's nice Lana." I say and roll my eyes.

"His words not mine. So, did he kiss you or did you kiss him?" She asks.

"Does that matter?"

"I want to know the story." She smiles.

"Well I kissed him but, then he kissed me."

"Was it nice?" She asks.

"It was." I say and can feel myself blushing.

"Good, I'm glad. You deserve to be happy especially with everything that has happened but, I never thought it would be the great Finnick Odair who would put that big smile on your face." She says.

"I know but, who knew how nice he was. I guess we should stop judging people before we meet them."

"Well, Annie with him it wasn't that big of an accusation, I mean he is even like that in District Four."

"That's because he thinks that is what people want."

She scoffs.

"Trust me Annie no one here wants that." She says

"I know."

"Well, why isn't he that way for you?"

"I told him not to besides I don't think he wants to be that narcissistic person when he is with me."

"Well, that's good."

"How are you though?"

"What do you mean?" She asks.

"You know with... Jason."

"Oh, that's good got nice plans tonight."

"Really."

"Really, it's very secretive though." She smiles."

"You have always liked that." I smile.

"Yes I have. Didn't we always say we wanted to date brothers when we were younger." She says

"Yes, so we could have a double wedding in our backyard and we would know they would get along."

"Exactly but now don't you think it is weird?"

"No, it's only weird if you make it weird." I smile.

"True." She says. "Well, I have to go." She stands up and pulls me up with her.

"Okay, well have fun doing whatever it is you're doing."

She rolls her eyes.

"I'm going to see my brother and his wife."

"Oh, well have fun with that."

"I'm sure I will." She smiles.

She heads into town to see her brother and I head back to Victors Village. I can see Finnick sitting on his porch outside, he seems to be thinking deeply about something. I head over to his house and sit next to him and he jumps. I don't think he noticed I was so close to him.

"Were you waiting for me?" I ask.

He rolls his eyes.

"You're not that important Cresta." He smiles and grabs my hand and laces my fingers with his. He seems far away, he seems distracted.

"Finnick, what's wrong?" I ask.

"Nothing." He says and looks at me.

"Something is bothering you, what is it?" I ask concerned.

He shrugs.

"It's just this..." He says and motions towards are interlocked hands.

"What about it? Are you changing your mind already Finnick?" I say slightly annoyed.

"No." He laughs "It's just you could do better."

I start laughing.

"You think this is funny Annie?" He asks angry

"Why would you say that?" I ask still.

"Because I go to the Capitol to do things and it isn't-

I kiss him to get him to stop talking. His body relaxes and he puts his hands on my cheeks.

"That's why you're already good enough." I say.

"What?" He asks confused.

"You think you're not good enough and you worry about me."

"Well, yes I love you Annie and I never want to be the person who hurts you."

I smile.

"Finnick Odair, you could never hurt me." I say.

"Never say never." He grumbles.

"You're an idiot." I say.

"But Annie I-

I kiss him again and his body relaxes.

"You're the best person for me Finnick Odair and like you said I'm stuck with you for life."

"I did say that didn't I." He smiles and kisses me again.

"So don't ever _ever_ think that again. Do better than the great Finnick Odair that is ludicrous."

"Yes _the _Finnick Odair." He says and rolls his eyes.

"Well, I didn't fall in love with that Finnick the one who is still in love with himself."

"I don't like that Finnick either." He mumbles.

"Well, maybe you could start with not having a double life anymore." I say.

"It isn't that easy Annie."

"Well, why is it when you are with me?" I ask.

"Because I don't want to be that other person when I'm with you, and you make it so easy."

"Well, I'm glad."

He leans in and kisses me.

"I love you." He tells me.

"I'm glad. You have no idea how long I wanted to hear you say that." I say.

"I know but, I didn't think I should've told you."

"Well, maybe you should've." I tease.

"It doesn't matter now." He says and kisses me again.

'When's the next time you leave?" I ask.

"Sunday." He says.

"It will be okay." I say.

"I know that will be fine it's just I don't want to argue with him anymore." He says.

"You mean Michael."

"Michael, Devil whatever you want to call him." He says.

"Finnick I don't think he is as bad as the devil."

"You don't know him well enough, you've only seen the tip of the iceberg."

"What made him hate you so much."

"Well weren't you listening to him. I ruined his sisters life... I'm a _mistake._"

"Finnick, you're not a mistake."

"Okay." He says and rolls his eyes.

"Finnick, how many times has he told you this."

"I don't know for the majority of my life. You think you would get used it but..." He shakes his head. "It doesn't matter at least he is telling me the truth."

"Finnick Odair don't let your terrible uncle make you think these things. Would your parents ever say this to you?"

He sighs.

"No, my mother didn't like it when he said it before. He would only do it indirectly and never said it to my face but, as I got older he did. I actually stopped seeing him after I won the games. I finally saw him again when my parents died but, it had been years and I think that was the the only reason I did see him again. Then he appointed himself legal guardian." He rolls his eyes.

"That means Marci doesn't know him very well." I say surprised.

"No, she doesn't but to be far I don't think any of us really do. I don't think she has any prior memories of him. It isn't right but, what can you do." He shrugs.

"Why does he just think you fool around when you go to the Capitol especially when he knows."

"Like you said he is a terrible person. I'm tired of having the same run around with him though, I just wish he would stop."

"Why don't you just not see him?"

"Because Marci always comes here before I go to the Capitol and Michael drops her off just so he can yell at me." He shakes his head.

"Well, maybe this time he won't."

"Oh no." He says and motions his head towards the exit of Victors Village and sure enough there he is with Marci.

Marci runs over towards Finnick.

"Hi Finnick, Hi Annie" She says.

"Marci." He says.

"You're going tomorrow right." She whispers.

He nods.

"Are you leaving?" Marci asks me.

I shake my head.

"No."

She nods and looks unhappy.

"C'mon Marci let's go inside." Finnick tells her and then it is just myself and Michael outside.

He smiles at me.

"Hello Annie."

"Yeah whatever." I mumble.

"Something wrong?"

"Yes, you."

"What have I ever done to you?" He says confused.

"Nothing directly I just don't understand how you can be so cruel to members of your family."

"You mean my mother?"

"Well, fine let's start there."

"She wouldn't have been able to take care of them I was doing her favor."

"Do you want to know why I think you did it?"

"Pray tell Annie why do you think I did it."

"Because I think you wanted to be able to torment Finnick for the rest of his life."

"And what makes you say that." He says defensively.

"According to him he didn't see you for years and then when his parents die you just magically appear again. You make it seem like you and your sister were so close but, I don't think that is the case. I think she wanted you to stay away from him because you were so terrible."

"How was I terrible Annie by telling him the truth?"

"That's just what you think but, his parents clearly didn't think this or else they wouldn't have had to die for you to see him again." I say.

"Do you want me to say it Annie, that I don't like him, that I think he is a waste of space, or that I think he is a living breathing mistake. All are things I have said to him before you can take your pick which you prefer. Personally I wasn't that devastated when his name was drawn from that bowl I think it would've been better if he didn't come back. Then he could no longer be a burden to anyone ever again."

"Oh my god." I say in disbelief. "You are a terrible excuse for a human being, you don't deserve everything you have and just for the record that _mistake _in there is saving your life every time he goes to the Capitol. He isn't high on your list but, I get the feeling he just wouldn't let Snow kill you. Unfortunately I don't think I can see the same for you." I say and then the door clatters open.

"Annie come on, I want to talk to you." Marci says and grabs my hand.

"You can leave Uncle Michael, Finnick promises to take me back before dusk." She smiles.

"I..." He trails off.

"Is something wrong?" Marci asks him looking slightly alarmed.

"No, Marci it is nothing. I will see you later then." He says and leaves. He has a strange expression on his face.

Finnick comes outside and looks around.

"Where did he go?" He asks sounding relieved.

"I took care of it." I say.

He looks at me strangely.

"It doesn't matter Finnick let's just go inside." I tell him.

"What did you do?" He asks me sounding worried.

"Something he needed to hear."

"It won't last." He says.

"Well, then savor this moment." I say and he kisses me on the cheek.

"Thank you."

"Your welcome." I say and kiss him.

I have a feeling he is right but, sometimes you just have to savor the little things and the small victories because ultimately those are the things that get you through the day.

**A/N: Hello everyone I just wanted to let you know that I probably won't be posting chapters this weekend because I have been feeling sick recently but, don't worry after that it will be back to the normal schedule. As always thanks for reading and reviewing!**


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

Tomorrow is the last week for festivals for awhile because the reaping for the 71st Hunger Games is in three weeks. This is know as the daffodil days festival it is really a week long celebration to signify the end of a harvest or something. It is really more than one festival in one each day is a different event. I have never been to all of them I usually go to the opening and closing days. I go to see what the vendors are selling on opening day, I go to the craft corner to help weave some of the flower net for this year, I go to see the fishing contest, and to collect sea shells.

The second day are the boat shows which I don't have an interest for, the third day has to do with history of boats and fishing which I learned in school the smaller kids like this day though, the fourth day is more of competition days on the beach small games, again it is mostly for smaller children, the fifth day is a sub festival because it is the romantic one, the starry night festival. I have never been to this one. Lana has and this is her favorite one. It has to do with the atmosphere or something. The starry night festival isn't always on the same day because they want the one with the clearest sky. They make decorations so it always looks like there are shooting stars. It sounds nice but, you can look at the stars anytime. The sixth day is left over day, and the seventh and final day is the blow out where they do anything you could imagine.

I hear a knock on my door and expect to see Finnick but, it is Lana instead.

"Hey." I say.

"Expecting someone else?" She teases.

"Finnick is supposed to come back sometime this week." I say.

"Oh right he's in the Capitol." She says sadly.

"Yes."

"Too bad I finally thought you had a shot at going the starry night festival." She teases.

"I can look at the stars with Finnick anytime if I wanted to."

"It's not the same and you know it."

"No, I don't. I never got why that was a romantic festival because anyone can look at the stars."

"It's just hard to explain. I came here to see if you wanted to go to the festival or if...

"I'll be fine Lana." I say. Large groups of people and me have not been getting along and neither has sleep and myself. I just want to be with Finnick he somehow makes the nightmares go away.

"Stop daydreaming about Finnick." She says.

"I wasn't-

She shoots me a doubtful look.

"Okay maybe a little."

"Don't worry I'm sure he will be back in time to take you to that festival."

"I don't care about going to that festival."

"Okay." She says with disbelief in her voice.

"Lana let's just go into town. I want to see-

"Yeah, yeah. I know what you want let's go." I smile.

We go and do all the fun activities and leave when the sun starts to set.

* * *

"How do I look?" Lana asks.

"Fine." I say with a sigh.

"Just fine." She says annoyed.

"I have watched you try on dress after dress they all looked fine except that awful green one and the pink one that made you look... fat."

"But-

"Lana you do this every year you try on a bunch of dresses and go with the first one. I don't see why it matters this is your boyfriend not some random guy like it usually is."

"Do I sense judgment in that voice of yours Annie Cresta?" She says.

"No... maybe." I say.

"Mmh well that's fine. You don't think this has to do with jealousy?"

"No." I roll my eyes.

"Okay."

"I don't care about this starry night festival. You have gone every year nothing is different."

"Yes it is because you have someone who loves you and they can't take you because they are uh... indisposed at the moment."

I roll my eyes.

"Wear the yellow." I say and hold out the yellow dress. "It looks nice with your hair."

"Blonde hair yellow dress I love it!" She says.

"Okay good." I say.

"Alright you can go home now."

"I-

"I know you want to Annie you do around this every year."

"I guess."

She smiles.

"Tell me about it tomorrow."

"I always do." She smiles and I head out the door and back to my house. I think about how different Lana is compared to last year, she has settled down more. She is more confident in herself and doesn't need to casually date anymore because she finally found one good enough for a second look. Who knew it would be Jason. Maybe it is because he is so quite all the time. I need to get to know him better he is Finnick's brother and Lana's... boyfriend.

I get to my house and close the door and sigh. I go to the kitchen and see the note on the fridge.

_Annie needed to work one of the booths might not come back. If you need me you will know where to find me. - Love Mom. _

I sigh I didn't really want to be alone but, it's not like I know anyone else. I always liked having few friends who I would be close with rather than a bunch of friends who I don't know very well.

I go upstairs and sit on the outdoor deck. I can see all of the festivities going on, I make a bond fire and watch the day turn to night. I look up at the stars like many couples are doing. I still don't get it, why is this so romantic.

* * *

I hear a knock on my door and know it is Lana to tell me everything that happened last night at the starry night festival.

"I'm supposed to give you this." She says and hands me a piece of paper.

"Hello to you too."

She rolls her eyes.

"Jason gave it to me to give to you what does it say?" She asks.

I open the envelope and it has a flower petal in it and says. _In between the beach and the grass is where you saw me last. __  
_

"What the?" I turn in around and nothing more. I don't recognize the handwriting either. It's talking about the flower petal but, the last time I was there with this petal was the flower festival with Finnick.

"What does it say." Lana says eagerly.

She reads it.

"What is this some sort of scavenger hunt?"

"I guess." I say.

"Do you know where this is."

"Yes."

She follows me to the spot I sat with Finnick when we watched the day turn to night and there is another note that reads _Annie _on the outside.

I grab it and open it. _Whether it be the ocean or the creek, what do fish like to eat? __  
_

I roll my eyes. I know Finnick wrote this card.

Lana grabs it from my hand.

"The bait shop!" She exclaims.

"No duh." I say.

"This is fun but, who wrote these."

"I think it was Finnick." I say.

"He isn't back Annie."

"I know maybe he thought I would get bored or something."

We get to the bait shop.

"Miss Cresta. I'm supposed to tell you that a treasure is waiting for you somewhere in this shop." The owner says with glee.

I go over to the treasure chest display and lift it up and find the next clue.

"That wasn't even hard." Lana says.

"I didn't know there was a difficultly level." I say and roll my eyes and open the note.

_It's time to go it alone you may want to go home. _

"What no it was just getting good." Lana says with disappointment.

"I will fill you in tomorrow." I say.

"You might want to tell Finnick to come up with better rhymes. He is almost twenty and it sounds like something a child would write."

"I didn't know it was a crime." I say.

She sticks out her tongue and heads to her house and I head to Victors Village. I walk up my porch and on the door I see another envelope.

_You must be on a winning streak I hope you aren't finding this bleak because the treasure you seek is closer than you think. _

"That's not vague or anything." I pause. "Maybe inside."

I look all over but don't see another envelope.

I sigh and go back outside and open the envelope again. I notice in the top left corner there is an arrow and it is pointing straight. It is pointing towards the fountain. I go to the fountain and see something on the bottom. I fish it out and open it, there is an envelope and I'm surprised it's not water logged. It had to be placed here recently but how, Finnick isn't back yet. Jason gave Lana the letter to give to me. He probably did this as well.

_I have never been in love before, you're my first and you'll be my only. Go to the place where those three words were first said._

I smile Finnick is definitely the culprit of these notes

"No rhyme this time."

I head to the pond since this is the first place Finnick and I me said we loved one another but, I think we loved each other sooner than that.

I see an envelope siting on the end of the fishing doctor. I pick it up and notice there is something else in this envelope.

The envelope says _open me_. I do and a paper isn't in the envelope it's a locket. I guess this is my treasure but, on the locket there is a piece of paper that says _open me_. I do as instructed and a piece of paper falls into my lap. I unfold it and it reads _turn around_.

"What?" I say confused.

I stand up and turn around and see the real "treasure".

"Oh my god." I say and I practically run over to Finnick and he hugs me and twirls me around.

"When did you get back? How did you have time to do this?"

"I got back probably an hour ago. I had it all planned out with Jason before I left in case I didn't get to take you to that festival."

"Finnick I didn't...

"Annie you love town events don't lie to yourself." He says.

"That one doesn't matter though, in fact none of those things matter anymore as long as I can be be with you." I say and he kisses me.

"I love you Annie." He whispers in my ear and puts a strand of hair behind my ear.

"I love you Finnick but, you don't have to do all this because all I want is you."

"I know but I wanted to." He says and I kiss him then hug him for what seems like a long time. I don't care about anything else at this time. All I care about is being here in this moment with Finnick.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

I put out my hands and can't stop them from shaking.

"It's okay Annie." Finnick says and kisses my cheek.

I can hear Aries making his opening remarks before he is going to introduce us and I keep feeling like I'm going to throw up.

"It's okay just stare at the horizon, don't look at the cameras. Just look at me, I will be right next to you."

"How am I going to do this? How am I going to mentor? How am I going I be someone I'm not."

"Don't worry Annie that won't happen."

"But how? You can't know that what about..." I don't want to even say Snow's deal out loud. I can already feel my hands starting to sweat and me drift from reality. I feel someone wrap their arms around me and I hug them back. I know it is Finnick.

"It's okay Annie." He says and smooths my hair and kisses my forehead. "And I can guarantee that, that won't happen." The way Finnick says this isn't a guess he does know.

"What did you do Finnick?" I ask concerned.

He looks at me and I can tell he doesn't want to tell me.

"I-

"Now let's give it up for our victors." Aries says and Finnick looks relieved. I don't know why, he isn't going to get out of the conversation that easily.

I walk out when Aries says my name. I sit down and pick a spot in the crowd and stare. I don't hear the names he calls, I don't even realize when it is over. Finnick taps my shoulder and takes me to the train.

I don't say anything and just walk in a zombie like state. I sit down robotically and I'm not paying attention to what Luna, Mags, and Finnick are talking about. It probably has to do with strategy for mentoring but, I can't think of that now. After a few minutes Finnick sits next to me and grabs my hand.

"It's okay Annie, we have forty five minutes before we leave the station and mentoring isn't as bad as it seems-

"You have to train two people and watch them die, how is that not bad Finnick?" I say surprised.

"There are worse things." He says gravely.

"What did you do Finnick?" I ask again.

"Don't worry about it Annie." He tells me and squeezes my hand.

"No, it involves me and Snow's deal, I can tell. Just tell me Finnick. I'm sure he is going to tell me when we get to the Capitol."

His facial expression changes I don't think he thought of that.

"Annie, let me explain first before you talk. Okay?"

"Okay."

"When I went to the Capitol last time I talked with Snow about you... about what was going to happen to you. He told me and I didn't like the answer so...

I gulp "What was the answer."

"Snow, has been watching you closely and he thought you would be alright to take on certain _clientele_."

I can feel the blood drain from my face it is as if I forgot how to speak so Finnick just continues on.

"I didn't want that to happen to you. You're too kind. You're too good. You're too pure." He says.

I have a feeling I know what Finnick is going to say next.

"So, I made a deal with him. I told him I would be more _accessible _then before. I will be going to the Capitol more Annie but-

"Finnick." I say.

"I thought you said not interruptions." He teases.

"How can you joke about this? How can you do this Finnick? Didn't you think I would feel guilty? You can't do this, I won't let you." I tell him.

"Unfortunately you don't get a say, once Snow makes a deal there is no going back. It's okay Annie-

"No, it's not."

I let go of his hand and back away from him slightly.

"Annie, please I'm doing what I know is right."

"That may be true Finnick but, this is my life and it is effecting you in a negative way."

"Annie." He looks at me gently "You're better than the other victors, you are and they all know it too."

"So?" I say annoyed.

"That's why this can't happen to you. I love you and I would rather die than see you in my situation. You're going to be fine."

"But what about you?" I say and I can feel tears forming in my eyes.

"Don't cry Annie. I will be fine as long as I have you."

A tear escapes my eye and he kisses my cheek. I hug him and let the tears drip onto his shirt.

"How can I make this up to you?" I ask.

"You don't need to do anything Annie being here, being in my life is enough." He gets me to look into his eyes. He doesn't look sad. He looks almost happy.

"Why do you look happy?" I ask him.

"Because I'm here with you." He kisses my forehead.

I smile.

"Aries will be here with the tributes soon. Remember the person I am on this train isn't the true me."

"I know." I say.

"Good."

"What am I supposed to do?"

He smiles "Just be you."

"What does that mean?"

"Nice, supportive, in our group you will be the one they will go to, to listen."

"Who are you?"

"The one they push. The mean coach." He rolls his eyes.

"The Capitol golden boy." I smirk.

"Him too."

"How do you keep all of them straight?"

"I know who I am Annie. I could be whoever or whatever Snow wants me to be but, he can never truly own me because he can never make me forget, he can never change the person I really am. As long as you know who you are. As long as you remember then he can never own you."

I smile and kiss him.

"None of that when the tributes get on the train." Luna says.

I want to say something but, Finnick interrupts.

"She's right Annie, I need to keep up the rouse."

"Okay." I say and kiss him one more time and let go of his hand.

He gets up and goes to the first car, I hope he isn't like he was when I first got on the train.

"Don't worry Annie we all have our roles." Luna says and takes me to the dining car.

"And what would those be?" I ask confused.

"Finnick is his alter ego self. Which I assume is saying enough however, he feels guilty doing this so he is nicer to them especially once we arrive to the Capitol. I am good at giving the strategical and fighting advice. Mags is the motherly role and you are the sweet and gentle girl. You will be there to listen. Finnick said you could just be yourself."

"Okay." I say.

I do and the tributes come on the train. I think the male tribute volunteered. I wasn't really paying attention and I didn't want to, they don't really seem interested in me anyways.

I go to my room to go to sleep but, I toss and turn and can't. The room is starting to feel very small I get up out of bed. I don't care about the rouse I want to be with Finnick.

I knock on his door and wait for him to answer but, he doesn't come. I knock again and nothing. I don't think Finnick would care if I just walk in so I do.

"Finnick?" I say. I can hear his shower is on. I look to the clock it is three in the morning. I'm about to leave but, I hear a loud crash come from the bathroom.

I knock on the bathroom door.

"Finnick are you alright?"

"Annie?" I hear him say confused he opens the door. His bathroom looks very messy and he looks lost. He is sitting in the shower with his pajamas on.

"Finnick what's wrong?" I say.

He doesn't say anything he looks afraid. I think he had a bad nightmare.

I sit next to him in the shower letting the water fall on me as well. I lace my fingers with his and lean against him.

He breathes in and out and relaxes.

"Annie." He says.

"I'm right here Finnick and I'm not going anywhere." I say and kiss him.

We sit here for awhile, I don't turn off the water and I don't ask him if that's what he wants. If he wanted it off he would've turned it off, it is calming him and making him feel better. He might have had a nightmare where he was on fire. It doesn't matter, I would walk through a snowstorm without a stitch of clothing for Finnick because I love him and I know he would do the same. He is doing the same by taking on more clients.

He shuts off the water and looks at me.

"I'm sorry." He says softly.

"Don't be." I whisper.

He hugs me.

"I'll be here for you Finnick, I'll always be here. After all if I'm _stuck _with you that means you're _stuck _with me." I smile.

"I guess I should've read the fine print." He smiles.

"Looks like it's too late now." I smile.

"I love you." He says.

I nod.

"Why did you come to see me? Are you alright?" He sounds worried.

"I'm like you, couldn't sleep. I know we are supposed to keep up the _rouse _but, I don't think I can in the nighttime. I don't think I will be able to sleep here without you." I say.

He runs his thumb across my cheek.

"You're always allowed to be here Annie. It doesn't matter the only people who will know are the tributes and if they become a victor they will know everything."

"Then why can't I be with you in the daytime?"

"Because then they will think we don't care." He says.

"Oh."

"Couldn't be further from the truth." He smiles.

I nod.

"We should go to sleep, we have to be up early to talk about the tributes." He says.

I nod.

I curl up on Finnick's bed and he holds me in his arms. I listen to his breathing and can already feel my eyes getting heavy. He kisses my forehead and I drift to sleep and I know if our roles were reversed I would be doing exactly what Finnick is for me. People do crazy things when they are in love, it may seem irrationally or illogical but, as long as you have that person who makes it worth it, those actions and sacrifices will be worth it.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

"Alright now today will be the recaps so pay attention." Aries tells the tributes.

I still have no idea what to do. Finnick told me just to be myself but, when they ask me things someone has to jump in and save me from the answer. I must be the worst mentor in history.

"Yes, pay attention because this is very important. You also get to see how the rest of the world saw you. If you yourself thought you looked weak then you probably did and that is not desirable." Finnick says. I hate this version of Finnick and the worst part is I can tell he hates it too. I think all of us can tell he hates it. Only the tributes and Aries can't tell the difference.

I watch the tributes, the ones from one and two are the same as usual both volunteers and both have blood lust in their eyes. District three's female is around fifteen and the male is around seventeen, they both look a little on the skinnier side. Next is our District, Chase did volunteer and he looks like he will fit in well with the people from one and two. Maddy didn't volunteer and she is shaking like a leaf. I know Finnick is going to yell at her for being weak so before he gets the chance I want to say something.

"Maddy it will be alright." I say.

She rolls her eyes.

"No, it won't. At least Finnick tells me the truth, even though he is acting like an ignorant jerk." She says.

Finnick shakes his head because he knows I want to say sorry.

I didn't really pay attention until it gets to District Seven.

"At least you didn't do that." Finnick says when they show the female tribute getcalled.

"What's the name again?" Luna asks.

"Johanna Mason." Chase says in a tone that makes me uncomfortable. He wants to kill her and it won't be hard either.

I understand what Finnick meant as soon as that girl's name got call, she barely made it up to the stage and she was in hysterics the whole time. I know I cried when I got called but it was only a few tears this girl is full out sobbing. The thing I don't understand is that she has a decent amount of upper body strength. District Seven is the lumber District she probably knows how to use an axe. That is a useful skill an easy way to kill someone it's probably the same thing as giving Finnick a trident. I think she is just scared, I'm sure he knows how to wield an axe.

"We should forget her yes?" Maddy says.

"No." I say before I can stop the words coming out of my mouth.

"Here we go." I can hear Chase mutter.

"She looks like she could be strong she could just be in shock."

"Speaking from your reaping Annie." He sneers.

"I'm just saying." I mutter.

"No, she's right that's why I asked for her name. You can truly forget about her when they show her score. If it's low she will die in the bloodbath." Luna says.

The rest is business as usual and I feel bad because as the number gets higher the tributes get skinnier.

"Good we will be in the Capitol in an hour. Your mentors will tell you what to expect for the opening ceremonies." Aries says and then leaves the room probably to get all prim and proper for the Capitol.

"So what can we expect?" Maddy whispers.

"It is different but, you only need to worry about getting made up by your stylists. Then when it's time to be presented just smile and wave. It will only last a few seconds. The important part comes from when the scores are posted and the interviews." Mags tells them gently.

Chase looks annoyed and Maddy nods.

"Just project confidence." Finnick adds.

I smile at him. I can tell he is miserable. I think we are all though.

The train slows and I see all of the people I hate and their strange color skin.

We get ushered into the makeup center and wait for Aries to take them to the stylists.

I sigh.

"Does this feeling go away?" I ask.

"What feeling?" Finnick asks.

"Like some fat person is sitting on my chest and making it hard to breathe. I can't do this Finnick." I whisper.

Finnick smiles and brush my hair behind my ear. "Count to ten Cresta. Everything will be okay." He says. I want to say more but I hear a shrill voice call for him.

"There you are Finnick." She smiles.

She has long red hair and pale skin that looks to be surgically enhanced. She has eyes that match the hair and she has long nails that remind me of claws. She is wearing an outfit that reminds me of a school uniform.

I know this girl isn't a friend it's a client and I can hear alarm bells going off. I want to cry but, I keep my composure.

"Hello Rin." He says in the faking charming voice he uses with these women.

"Are you ready?" She giggles.

"Give me a minute please." He says.

"It will be alright after the parade it is just dinner time then bed. It will be alright, I will come to see you once I get back." He says.

I nod. I don't think I will be able to say anything to him.

"Don't cry Annie." He says. "It's not your fault." He strokes my hair and walks off to Rin.

"I'm all yours." He says. She laces her arm with his and they leave. I wonder where they are going. I have a feeling I know what they will be doing.

There's a loud bang noise and something spills all over. It looks like water and it goes up to my knees.

"No." I say to myself and try to run away but, I slip and fall down. That is the last thing I remember.

* * *

I wake up and am in my bedroom. The last thing I remember is slipping and falling on the water that was in the makeup center. I don't like a great deal of water, I don't think I will ever be able to go swimming again. I used to love going to the beach and swimming in the ocean but, now it just reminds me of the arena. Something else those games have taken from me.

I roll over. I don't know what time it is and I don't care either. After a few minutes I hear the door open and bolt up.

"It's okay Annie." Finnick says and sits next to me.

"What happened?" I ask.

"You fell down and hit your head."

I touch my head and feel a bump

"Don't worry you're fine it's just...

He trails off.

"Am I going to be okay." I ask worried.

"You're not hurt Annie." He smiles. "You just aren't allowed to leave the suite until the games start." He says.

"Why?"

"Snow doesn't want...

"I don't care what he wants." I mutter.

Finnick pushes my hair behind my ear and kisses my forehead.

"He doesn't want the citizens to see how affected you are from your games."

"Didn't you just tell you that he wanted to sell me for... stuff."

"He does, this deal isn't what it seems. You get sold and they can do whatever they want to, whether you want it or not." He says.

I gulp I know what he means and I feel worse.

"But... what did I do?" I ask again.

"I wasn't there but, from what I've been told you started screaming about water or something and tripped and fell on something. You were in some kind of strange trance. They couldn't get you out of it for a long time."

"I don't remember." I whisper.

"It doesn't matter you don't need to remember. All that you need to know is that you're alright and you're safe and that I love you." He tells me.

I hug him.

"That's all that matters." He whispers and kisses my forehead.

"That is all that matters." I whisper and kiss him.

I hug him tightly and he strokes my hair. I don't want him to leave but, I know he will have to soon. I'm not going to tell him this because I know he doesn't want to leave me and he will feel worse than he already does. I feel bad watching him leave because I won't know if the client he is going to see was one he had to see already or an extra one he has to see because he is protecting me.


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

I tap my fingers against the table top. I'm not allowed to leave the room per President Snow's request and it gets boring when no one else is in the room. It can be very frightening as well. Apparently, when I fell down yesterday there was no water, I just thought there was. It makes me feel crazy and I think the other victors have these thoughts as well. I know I'm not crazy. At least I think I know.

I hear the elevator ding and pray it is Finnick. Him Luna and Mags are all doing official mentor business but I'm not allowed to leave the room until the games are over. But the person who comes into view isn't Finnick, it's his client from yesterday.

"Oh hello Annie." She giggles. I'm about to ask how she knows my name but because I'm a victor and the newest one to boot she would definitely remember me.

"Hello, Rin. Correct?" I say remembering her. Her skin seems very shiny today I'm assuming it is some type of makeup. She plops next to me and touches my hair.

"Does he talk about me then?" She asks excited.

"Does who talk about you?" I ask confused.

"Finnick, I mean... you know my name he must have mentioned me."

"He has." I say which isn't a lie. He said she wasn't as bad as other clients but, he has to see her one more time. Even though his reputation says he never sees the same girl twice that isn't true for Rin.

"Really?" She chirps "Maybe I have stolen his heart that is something no one else has achieved. Just imagine him on my arm or next to me forever. Isn't that a pretty picture Annie."

"Yes, it really is." I say with disgust. They really do only like him for his looks.

"Well... do you know where he is? I'm a bit early for our outing."

"He is doing something for the tributes."

She nods

"Oh right that. I wish he didn't have to then he could have more time to play." She smiles.

"Isn't that what we all want to... play." I say.

"So we should talk. You know Finnick better than any person in this room, just tell me Annie are the rumors true." She smiles and smooths my hair.

"Why all the women, yes I-

"No Annie not that and we all want to be with him because his selection pool is very high and know he only picks the best ones."

I nod. I'm sure she knows that is not entirely true because she is with him.

"Then what did you mean?" I ask confused.

"Annie c'mon you know what I mean. After all, word around the Capitol is you and Finnick had _fun_ on your Victory Tour. What I wouldn't have given to be with Finnick alone on a train for a month. Traveling and such it is almost a vacation."

I feel disgusted the reason I was on that train with him for a month was because I was in a place where I had to kill people. The people in the Capitol couldn't last a day in another District.

I know what she is implying and I don't like it.

"No Finnick and mines relationship is just professional." I say.

"Oh that's to bad. I wanted to know if everything people say about him in the bedroom is true." She smiles

I don't know how to respond so I just look at her strangely.

"You know Annie you're very fair." She says and she runs her fingers through my hair and places her hand on my inner thigh. She is starting to lean in I don't want her to kiss me. So I turn my cheek.

"Do you play hard to get Annie." She winks. I hear the elevator ding and hope that is Finnick to take her away from me.

"Rin I'm so sorry I kept you waiting." He says and is smiling.

"It's alright Finnick I was having some fun with Annie." She winks.

I shiver I want her to leave. I don't know how Finnick deals with these people. I guess it is because he knows it will keep Marci and Jason safe. My name is in the mix now too because he is taking on extra clients for me.

"Annie, the tributes will back in an hour. Luna and Mags can fill you in before they get back." Finnick says. I can tell he is trying not to laugh. He must think Rin trying to kiss me is funny.

"Thanks."

"You all done?" Rin asks him.

"Yes." He says

"Bye Annie it was fun." She says and kisses my cheek.

Finnick is laughing silently probably because of the uncomfortable look on my face. Why would you show so much affection to someone you just met.

_She does buy people to have sex with them. _I think.

"Let's go Miss. Rin." He says as hold out his hand and they head to the elevator.

Twenty minutes later I hear the elevator ding and see it is Mags and Luna. Luna heads straight to her room but Mags comes and sits with me.

"Hello Annie." She smiles.

"Hi Mags." I say. She sits next to me and strokes my hair.

"Are you alright?" She asks.

"Yes… I just want to go home." I say very calculated.

She smiles.

"I think we would all enjoy that but that is not the hand we were dealt."

"I know." I whisper.

"It will be over before you know it." She says.

We sit here in silence then I remember Finnick told me to ask them to fill me in on what is going on.

"Um... Finnick said I should ask what's going on with the tributes because I'm not... allowed to leave." I say.

"It's alright Annie, you're fine. Do you think you're fine?"

"Yes but-

"Then that is all that matters." She says.

"You tell Finnick the same thing don't you?"

She smiles.

"Yes. When he started doing this. It is hard to live a double life all the time Annie but, if he remembers who he truly is then everything will be fine."

"Well, what if he forgets?" I ask.

"He won't especially now." She says and looks at me.

"Why is that?"

"Because he has you." She says.

I smile.

"But, to answer your questions about the tributes nothing exciting has happened they are training right now. Luna, Finnick, and myself were just discussing about sponsors and things."

"How do you get sponsors?" I ask.

"More times than not they seek us about because we are considered a career District however, when we need to find some most of Finnick's clients want to help." She says and I can detect sadness in her voice.

"Oh..."

"But, sometimes people want nothing to do with our tributes usually when the score is low." She says.

"I see."

"Don't worry, I don't think that will happen this year at least not with Chase." She says.

"What about Maddy?" I ask.

"I'm sure she could do something." She says.

I nod.

I hear the elevator ding and can hear Aries talking.

"Splendid just splendid!" He says with joy.

When they come into view I can see Chase is rolling his eyes and Maddy looks bored.

"How did it go?" I ask.

"Just fine Annie." Aries tells me. Chase looks annoyed and I know it isn't at Aries.

"It went fine Annie." Maddy tells me.

"You two should wash up before dinner." Aries says Chase heads to his room but, Maddy hangs back.

"Is there something you wanted to talk about Maddy?" Mags asks her.

She looks down at her hands and picks her cuticles.

"I wanted to talk to Annie... alone." She practically whispers.

"Uh... sure we can go to your room." I say.

She looks up and smiles.

She takes me to her room and we sit on her bed.

"Maddy I don't know how helpful I can be for you." I tell her truthfully.

"I figured but, out of the other mentors you seem the most humane."

"What about Mags?"

"She's nice but, you're closer to my age."

"Oh..." I nod.

"Annie, I'm scared I know I'm going to die."

"Don't think that. I thought the same thing and here I am."

"Yes, but I think it was mostly luck that you won."

"I'm not going to argue with you but, I think you need some luck to win this game. It isn't all about skill."

"No, but you have a better shot at wining if you know what you're doing."

"Well, don't you?" I ask.

"Yes. I'm good at knife throwing but, I don't think that will impress _them_."

"The gamemakers? or the people from one and two?"

"The gamemakers."

"Don't worry you're from Four that already gives you a leg up." I smile.

She nods.

"Well at least I know I'm better than one person." She says.

"And who would that be?"

"The girl from seven, she just sat in the corner and cried all day. I felt sorry for her, I don't think it was shock Annie, she doesn't know how to do anything."

"She looks strong though."

"That doesn't mean she knows how to kill." Maddy points out.

"True, we should stop worrying about her though. Just focus on yourself and making friends for now. You should take a shower if you don't Aries will never let you hear the end of it." I smile.

She laughs.

I'm almost to the door when her voice stops me.

"Hey Annie?"

"Yes?"

"You're not what people say you are, you're gently and kind. You care about others."

I smile.

"Thank you."

I leave the room and head to mine at least Maddy likes me and finds me helpful and not a useless person. I just wish everyone else viewed me that way.


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

It's dinner and I'm pushing the peas around my plate. I don't like being around Chase and I feel sick whenever he opens his mouth.

"So Luna, Mags, and Annie will go over tomorrow events." Aries says.

"Where's pretty boy?" Chase sneers.

"Helping you." Luna says.

"Yeah I'm sure that's true." He says sarcastically.

"Tomorrow is the individual evaluations, do you know what you might show the gamemakers?" Mags asks.

"Stuff." Chase sneers and gets up from the table and leaves.

"Do you have any idea Maddy?" Mags asks her.

"I don't know." She whispers.

"You said you were good at throwing knives right, just show them that." I suggest and smile. She smiles back.

"Won't every other person be showing them this?"

"It doesn't matter just do a good job, people are already betting on you. " Finnick says. While walking towards the table, I didn't even hear him come in.

"Is this true?" She looks to me for conformation but, I don't know. I'm sure Finnick would have the best guess though.

"If Finnick says it is I'm sure it is true." I tell her.

She looks Finnick up and down and looks at his wrinkled clothes and messy hair and her eyes are judging him. I must say I was doing the same thing last year however I saw through his facade quickly.

"Okay. I think I'm done for the night." She says and goes to her room.

Finnick comes and sits next to me and holds my hand.

"Is that true Finnick?" Luna asks him.

"Yes, mostly because of that Johanna girl. She is the talk among the Capitol they are all betting on her."

"Really, why?" I ask surprised.

"They are betting to see how long she will last. They are betting to the hour." He says with disgust.

"That's terrible." I say.

"That's the Capitol." Luna says and gets up and leaves.

"I think I'm going to go to bed." I say.

"I'll go with you." Finnick says.

"Goodnight." Mags tells us.

We head to my room.

"How was your day? Were you okay by yourself?" Finnick asks me concerned.

"I was fine. How was you're day, you don't look okay Finnick."

"What you mean this." He teases.

"Finnick I'm serious." I say.

He sighs.

"I'm fine Annie." I look at him doubtfully. "Really I am."

"You smell like cigarettes and look terrible-

"Yes, well Rin is a smoking client." He says and rolls his eyes.

"Is that like an option smoking or non-smoking." I tease.

He rolls his eyes and kisses my cheek.

"I love you." He says.

"I love you too."

"I need to shower." He says.

"No one is stopping you." I say and motion towards the bathroom.

He gets off the bed and heads to the bathroom.

I hear the shower turn on and roll over. I know I shouldn't be wanting to sleep but the sound of the water is making my eyes heavy. I fight to stay awake so I can see Finnick more.

I roll over and hear the shower go off. I see Finnick come out his hair is messy and wet as if he just stepped off from the boat but, he just had a clean shower instead.

Finnick then falls back on the bed and I instinctively move closer to him. He puts his arm around my shoulder and I lace my fingers with his and lean next to him.

"Feel better?" I ask him.

He shrugs

"It was just a shower Annie ." He smiles

"Well I like it because you don't smell the cigarettes anymore." I say.

"I see." He says.

I sit here listening to him breathe in and out.

"What's it like?" I ask him.

"What's what like?" He asks confused.

"You know this whole deal thing, do they pay you by the hour or is it like a flat rate."

"Why, do you want to purchase me Annie?" He teases

"No. I'm just curious." I mumble.

"Well, it is usually a flat rate but, it depends how long they _rent _me." He says with disgust.

"I see, don't they know what they are doing is wrong."

Finnick turns and looks at me as if to study me.

"To the Capitol citizens everything and everyone is for sale. Anyone can be bought for the right price, that's how they see it anyways."

"That's not right shouldn't they know that."

"Annie, they like seeing people fight to the death for entertainment and they don't see anything wrong about it." Finnick says I can tell he is getting annoyed with all of these questions.

"I'm sorry." I whisper.

"It's fine. I don't really talk about this with anyone." He says.

"Well, you don't have to talk to me about it Finnick. I was just curious."

"But, I like talking to you. I feel like I could tell you anything." He says.

"And why is that?" I say with a smile.

"No idea but, if I start questioning it the whole system falls apart."

"System?" I ask confused.

"You know love life everything else in between."

"Oh, that system." I say.

"You sound disappointed Cresta what did you want me to say?"

"I don't know, I didn't think I sounded disappointed." I whisper.

"Maybe I'm reading into things."

"Are you disappointed Finnick?" I ask him. I'm almost afraid to hear his answer why else would he think I'm disappointed.

"I... no." He says.

"You don't sound sure." I say.

"I'm not disappointed. It's just... I wish somethings were different."

"Like what?"

He doesn't answer.

"Like what Finnick?"

"Not having killed someone. Not watching people die. Not having people buy me like I'm some... product." He shakes his head in disgust.

"We all have things to worry about some more than others." I say.

"I guess." He mumbles.

"You have me."I smile.

"Yeah, I guess. I mean there are worse things." He says.

"What?" I say.

"Wait that came out wrong. Annie, that's not what I meant."

"You're just putting up with me. There are worse things to do" I say. "I'm just convenient for you."

"Annie, no."

"Yes, I am, I'm such an idiot." I say and get up off the bed. I'm about to leave

"This is my room get out Finnick."

"But-

"Get out, just leave me alone."

"Annie-

"No. No Annie. No but. You know I'm tired of this Finnick. Even when I have you I don't actually have you."

"But, I'm not good being with new people. I just-

"Well, start learning, I can't tell you how to do everything Finnick. I can't keep waiting around and getting hurt and turning into some girl I hate."

"Girl you hate?" He asks confused.

"The one that pines and cries over a guy that doesn't even care about me."

"Annie, I do care about you." He says.

"Yeah but, there could be _worse _things than this." I say.

"I didn't mean it like that, I just meant this thing could be good _if_ things were different."

"Different?"

"Snow's deal... I just think maybe this isn't ideal." I say.

"So what?" I say.

"You're going to get hurt." He says and walks over towards me. "I don't want to be the one who hurts you."

"You're not going to hurt me Finnick. If anyone does the hurting around here it's going to be me." I say and tap his chest and he smiles. "I don't want something easy that would make it boring and won't make you appreciate it more.

"Annie-

"There's no one else I like more than you. There's no one else I have felt this secure with before. I want you and I don't want _good _or _good enough. _I want this, I want can't breathe, I can't live without this. I can't live without you and I don't know if that is what you feel but... this is enough for me Finnick. You're more than enough. You're everything to me." I say. I wait to hear is response, I'm strangely nervous.

"It just occurred to me that it might be too soon to stay all this stuff..." I say and look at the ground. I can hear Finnick trying to hold in laughter. He pulls up my chin so I can look at him. He kisses me.

"I love you." He says. "And I can't live without you, and I don't want to but-

"No buts Finnick." I hug him. "That's all that matters. You're all that matters."

I hug him and his body contours into mine perfectly.

"I love you." I say and hug him for a long time before I hear Finnick say.

"I love you too."

**A/N: Can't believe there are already 30 chapters :O. Thank you for reading and reviewing! I'm glad you are liking it!**


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

I wake up and notice I'm not on my soft plush bed that was in the Capitol but, I'm outside on the ground. I'm not in the Capitol either I don't know where I am. It looks mountainous. It looks like my arena.

I close my eyes.

_No that ended a year ago. You're back for mentoring. You won. _I think to myself but, before I know it I hear the Capitol anthem go off and it is showing the faces of the dead tributes and I recognize them. They were from my arena, they were in there with me but, they died.

"Cresta." I turn around and see Bruno.

"Good job getting that girl from seven, too bad about your District partner though."

"But... I... ran.. dead..."

"You okay?" He asks.

"What do you mean? I killed the girl from seven?" I ask with disbelief.

"Looks like Stevie was right you were in some murder trance. I mean look at all that blood on you, I wouldn't want to go up against you anytime soon that is." He smiles.

I look down and see the blood he mentioned and there is so much blood that my outfit is sticking to me like a second skin.

"This doesn't make sense though." I whisper.

"What?"

"Where's Finnick?" I ask him.

"Probably in the Capitol he sent us some nice parachutes if that is what you meant."

"But..." I start to feel dizzy.

_This isn't what happened. I ran away after he died. I sat and cried for the rest of the time and almost drowned. _I think to myself.

"I don't... I don't..."

"Cresta come on Stevie already doesn't like you, don't give her another excuse to kill you."

"But..."

Maybe it was just a dream. Maybe you were in the arena all along. Being with Finnick and winning the Hunger Games was just something I made myself believe so I wouldn't be as afraid to die.

"You're right let's go back to make camp." I say.

"Now you're talking." Bruno smiles.

We head back to camp and it is as if I never left the arena.

_Because you did never leave. _I think to myself.

The rest of the careers boast about the people they killed and praise me for killing the girl from seven so violently.

I sigh. I know I'm going to die but, that imagination felt so real. I can almost feel Finnick's lips still pressed against mine.

I offer to watch first mostly because I don't trust these people. The next day comes and we all kill more people. I don't go for anyone unless they ask me to because I don't want to kill people but, I don't want to seem like a weakling and now that I don't have Dan looking out for me it is just myself. It has always been anyways because only one can win.

It gets down to almost just us. I figure I should run away. I'm not strong enough to fight against them when the punches start rolling. I offer to take first watch and start to leave. Once I get far enough away I start to make my own camp until I hear someone step on a rock. I turn around but, not fast enough because Stevie has tackled me to the ground.

"Should've killed you sooner _Cresta _but, since Bruno had a little crush on you he kept insisting that we keep you alive until it is down to us. I knew you would try and run off. I've had my eye on you." She says with a knife to my neck. I try and push her face off of me but, it does no good she holds tighter onto my limbs.

"I don't want you to scream but, I still want to see the life drain from your eyes." She says and before I can say anything she wraps her hands around my neck. My lungs feel like they are fire because they are craving air. I push her face trying to get her to stop but it is no use, my face is turning hot and I feel like I'm drowning. My eyesight is starting to go. Then all I see is darkness.

* * *

I open my eyes and see a strange sense of light. I'm gasping for air because Stevie was trying to strangle me. I wonder what happened to her. I sit up and feel someone is next to me and they start to come near me.

"No, don't come near me. Please don't kill me." I shout. I move away from the person who I think is Stevie and fall off and hit my head but, not hard enough because I get up and run away. I find myself a cubby and stay there and hide rocking back and forth. After a few minutes I realize that I am in a closet, not in a mountain crack.

"But... they must have changed it." I whisper confused.

I hear footsteps coming this way and I put my hand over my mouth to cover my breathing.

"Annie?" The person says.

"Annie, it's alright. I'm not going to hurt you." They say the voice sounds nice and comforting but, I know it isn't true. It's a trick they are going to kill you. I can feel hot tears run down my face. I don't know if it is because I'm afraid or annoyed by their trickery.

"Annie..." They say and slump next to the door. "I know you're in there, I'm not going to hurt you. Everything is alright, you're here with me Annie."

"With who?" I ask softly.

"Annie it's Finnick."

I shake my head.

"No, you're not here, you're not real. I'm not in the Capitol."

"Where do you think you are?" He asks me gently.

"In the arena."

"Annie no, you won last year. It was just a nightmare."

"No, it wasn't. You're lying, Stevie just tried to strangle me. You can't trick me." I tell him.

"Annie, that happened last year but, she drowned from the break of the dam."

I put my hands over my ears to drown him out everything he is saying is not true. You're in the arena still, you're not with Finnick and he has never loved you.

I can hear him trying to talk to me sill but, I grip my ears tighter and start humming to myself. I rock back and forth and can feel myself hit the wall. Finnick tries to open the door but, I have it blocked off.

I start crying harder and can feel the hot tears and snot running down my face. I want to go home.. I want them to leave me alone. I want to leave.

I feel something fall down my neck.

"What?" I say confused. I pick it up and see it is a necklace, it's a locket. It look vaguely familiar maybe I used it as my token.

"I wonder what's inside." I whisper.

I open it and a piece of paper falls out. It is crinkly around the corners. I open it carefully, I don't want to rip it. It reads _turn around._

"Turn around." I say confused. It takes me a minute before I realize what this is.

Turn around... The cheesy scavenger hunt Finnick did because he couldn't take me to the starry night festival. But did that really happen?

I move the barricade and hesitantly open the door. I see Finnick sitting next to it.

"Annie it's okay." He tells me I hold up my hand in a stop motion and he stops dead in his tracks.

"I got this from your scavenger hunt when you couldn't take me to the starry night festival right?" I say and hold up the locket.

"Yes."

"You love me?"

"With all my heart." He says with his classic smile.

"I didn't kill the girl from seven in the arena?" I ask.

"No, Bruno did that after you ran away."

I nod and know that everything he is telling me was true and that me in the arena was all false.

I rush over to hug him. I can start to feel the tears fall onto his shirt.

"It's okay. You're alright. You're safe here. You're safe with me." He says and kisses my forehead.

I don't say anything because I'm crying so hard. My legs start shaking and I almost fall down. Finnick picks me up and takes me back to the room. He holds me in his arms and I cry until I fall asleep.


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32**

I wake up and my eyes are sore from crying so much. I see Finnick has his arms around me still. He looks at me and smiles. I wonder how long he was watching me sleep.

He kisses my forehead.

"Good morning Annie." He whispers in my ear.

"Morning." I whisper. I feel slightly embarrassed from what happened last night. I got confused about reality. I really thought that all of this was something I made up to make me feel better.

Finnick runs his thumb over my cheek.

"What's going on in that head of yours Annie." He whispers in my ear.

"I honestly have no idea." I say and sit up so I can get a better view of him.

"And why would you say that?" He smiles.

"Finnick come on look what happened last night." I say.

"What happened last night?" He smiles.

"Finnick come on. I thought this was fake, I thought you weren't real. I thought me being in the arena was happening but that wasn't true."

"It's okay Annie." He says nonchalantly like I was late for something.

"Finnick." I say slightly annoyed.

"Annie it's okay, you're alright."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are."

"Normal people aren't like this."

"Annie I'm going to let you in on a little secret being normal is very overrated." He says and his lips briefly touch mine.

"But, I want that." I say

"Well, Annie you do have that."

I roll my eyes.

"I'm serious." He says

"How am I 'normal'." I say

"You have people who care about you."

"How does that make me normal?"

"Because almost anyone can say that."

"I don't feel normal. Normal people can tell when something is a dream or not." I mutter.

He shrugs

"As I said being normal is overrated."

I don't think he is right I would do anything to be normal. How can someone love me when I am so… different.

"Why do you love me?" I ask abruptly.

"What?" He says confused

"I need to know why you love me." I say.

"It's not because you're normal that's for sure." He smiles. "You're smart and kind and have a natural ability to care for others. You never expect anything in return for something you do it, you just do it to help. You're dedicated to the people who you love and trust. You make me feel like I should be like that and no _normal_ person would be that helpful or caring. A _normal_ person wouldn't put as much effort as you do into things."

I smile and hug him tightly

"Hold on why do you love me?" He asks in a joking tone but, I can tell he truly wants to know. It isn't that strange when most people who _love _him do because they find him 'pretty'

"You're also a nice person more so than most. You're smart too, I like how you are around Jason and Marci. How you love your family. You can always spin something as positive or make a joke to easy the tension and most important you're there for me. You've always been here and I think you'll always be here." I say and leans in and kiss him.

He stops kissing me.

"Oh and you're not terrible to look at." I smile.

"I knew it, it was the pretty boy charm." He teases.

He leans in and kisses me again this time the kiss has more passion. I stop kissing him and just hold him again.

After ten minutes there is a knock on the door and it is Aries telling us to get the common room at once.

"He never does this." Finnick says.

"What do you think he wants?" I ask. I hope it isn't about last night. Aries saw me after I won and on the Victory Tour he should know I'm… abnormal.

"We won't know until we leave." Finnick says and gets off the bed.

I smile and laugh slightly.

"What?" He asks.

"You have an intense case of bedhead."

He rolls his eyes and messes with my hair.

"Now so do you." He kisses my forehead.

"Let's go see what Aries wants." He says

I put my hair up because I'm not going to let anyone see me like this.

"About done?" Finnick smiles.

"Hey I don't want Aries judging me."

"He's from the Capitol that is like his job" He smiles and holds our his hand which I happily take and we was out to the common room. Mags and Luna are both here and both are still in there jammies too. I don't think this happens very often.

"Good now that we are all here we need to talk about the situation."

"What situation?" Luna asks annoyed.

"The Maddy situation." He says

"What's the Maddy situation?" I ask

"No one like her." Aries says.

"I'm sure that's not true." I say.

"This is true Annie everything is backwards this year because they keep talking about that weakling."

"Do they think she will win or something?" Mags asks she sounds hopeful maybe she wants the poor girl I win.

"No like Finnick said they are betting intensely down to the minute of when she will die."

"It used to be an hour now to the minute that is... interesting." Finnick says.

"People are just throwing away money that easily." I whisper.

"They aren't throwing it away Annie, they are making an investment." Aries says.

"Well what do the mentors think of this Johanna?" I ask. I know they all visit with one another I'm not allowed to leave the room so it makes it hard for me to make friends.

"Most don't even know her name." Luna says. "Especially the mentors from One and Two." She says. I always wondered if she volunteered. She has the fighting skills hence the scar on her face but she doesn't seem very ruthless.

"Well at least that is something." Aries says relieved.

"What does this have to do with Maddy again?" I ask this is how the conversation started.

"She is just another face, she might as well be from District 12." He says.

"Don't you think this is premature Aries the scores haven't even been shown yet." Mags says.

"Well, I think we should be prepared, Finnick I'm assuming you're going to be leaving later like usual, so I think you should try and do some damage control."

"Okay but-

"Splendid!" He says before Finnick has answered. "The tributes will be awake soon maybe, you should all make yourselfs look _presentable_." He says and his eyes linger on Finnick for a minute because of the bed head. I laugh and try to hide it with a cough but, I think I only convinced Aries.

He gets up to leave.

"So what are we really going to do?"

"Wait for the scores and then worry about her. Aries may think he knows what's best but really he doesn't." Luna says and leaves.

"Do you two think his too?" I ask.

"We can't magically change their mind." Mags says

Finnick opens his month to say something.

"No matter what you do Finnick it won't change their mind, not really." She says gently.

He nods even though it looks like he wants to say more.

"I should get going anyways I have an early client today." He says and walks back to the bedrooms so it is just Mags and myself.

She smiles at me.

"Are you going to be alright by yourself Annie?" Mags asks me, that must mean she heard me last night. Which means everyone else did too.

I shouldn't be surprised, I was screaming and sobbing loudly.

"I will have to be, the rest of you have important things to be doing." I say while looking at my feet.

"Not necessarily. I could ways stay here with you Annie" She says and I look up at her.

"Don't the people in the Capitol have to see you."

She smiles

"People don't care about an old crow like me. It's all about the new victors and the glitz and glamour." She smiles.

"You could really stay with me."

"If that is what you want."

I smile.

"I would like that very much." I say.

"Good. I know the feeling of loneliness Annie, especially here, it is not a good feeling." She says

"Luna was your first wasn't she?"

She nods.

"I have seen many good people die here because of this." She says.

"Did she volunteer?" I ask.

"Yes, she is kinder than she used to be. The games and mentoring have softened her. That doesn't happen to the volunteer victors usually."

"So she is better than the others?"I ask.

"People react to things differently. None of us are the same. We all deal with the aftermath of our games in our own way." She smiles.

"I see." I say.

Finnick comes out ten minutes later.

"Time to leave." He says.

He walks over to me and kisses me.

"You'll be okay by yourself Annie." He says this but, it sounds like he is asking me.

"Don't worry she will has some company today." Mags says.

Finnick looks relieved when he hears this.

"Good, that's good." He says.

"I'll be backwater probably after the training sessions." He says and heads to the elevator. I feel sad watching him leave to do who knows what with strange people.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter 33**

I get very bored when no one is around so I usually just fall asleep if I can. I like the feeling that someone else is here with me though. Mags is easy to talk to, she has that warm personality. She reminds me of my mother.

I have fallen asleep on the couch in the common room Aries is probably going to yell at me because I'm supposed to be thinking of ways I can help the tributes. I don't know how else I could help them especially since I'm not allowed to leave the room. I'm awake now but, can't bring myself to open my eyes because I feel so comfortable.

I hear the elevator ding and can hear people walk over here. I can hear one of them hiccup.

"So this is where _he _is keeping her." I hear someone slur in a voice that sounds familiar.

"Yes." Finnick says. I can feel him brush my hair.

"How is she? People talk Finnick." He says. He sounds incapacitated I think it is one of the mentors, which means I met them on the Victory Tour.

"I know Haymitch but, she doesn't need to know that."

"She isn't stupid." He grumbles.

"How would you know?" He says annoyed.

He snorts.

"Just because she isn't all there doesn't mean she isn't smart."

"She's fine." Finnick says defensively.

"You really do love her then." Haymitch says.

"What does that matter?" Finnick asks.

"Because no one else would say that." Haymitch says.

"That's not true." Finnick says.

"If you didn't love her you wouldn't say that." Haymitch says.

"What do you know about love? I thought you weren't capable of that emotion."

Haymitch snorts again.

"Maybe." He says.

It is silent. I feel like I should open my eyes but, then I know they would stop talking about me.

"What do people say about her?" Finnick asks after awhile.

"Do you really want to know?" Haymitch asks. I get a terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. What do these people think of me?

"That bad?" Finnick says.

"It's probably not as bad as you are thinking, although the crazy word is thrown around a lot."

"She isn't crazy." Finnick whispers.

"Beetee would love to talk with her for an hour to see how she is around new people."

"Well, he will not get the chance. Annie is not one of his experiments." Finnick says angrily.

"True but, he won't see it that way." Haymitch says.

I can feel Finnick stoke my hair.

"They also say she doesn't understand the difference between reality and fantasy, is that true?" Haymitch asks. Finnick's hand freezes on my head. I'm curious to hear what he is going to say about this.

"That's... that's...

"Looks like that part is true then." Haymitch says and I can detect sadness. I want to tell him I don't want his pity because he clearly thinks I'm already completely bonkers.

"She sometimes thinks that everything she knows is true even if it is false. When this happens she thinks everything everyone tells her is a lie because she believes that she and she alone knows the truth." Finnick says sadly.

_Do I really do this? _I think to myself.

"Dumb that down for me I have been drinking."

"When are you not." Finnick scoffs. "For example we are in the Capitol right now correct?" Finnick asks.

"Of course." Haymitch says.

"If she thought we were in District Four she would think that no matter how much you or I or anyone told her this was the Capitol. This is because she thinks she is true. Her mind thinks she is true even though everyone else knows she's not."

"So what, do you just play along with her fantasies ?" Haymitch pauses. "Is that why you tell her you love her because she thinks you do but, you really don't."

I have no idea if I do these things. I know I sometimes get confused but, I don't always think false things are true. To hear Haymitch say that Finnick does not love me breaks my heart. He would just be pretending to be in love with some poor crazy girl. I feel like crying just at the thought.

"Of course not, that would be a terrible thing to do." Finnick says offended.

"Well, you can't say it wasn't that crazy of an assumption." Haymitch mumbles.

"Don't you have somewhere you need to be?" Finnick says clearly trying to get rid of him.

Haymitch sighs.

"I think Snow keeping her in here is more of a disadvantage to her personally. Keeping her in here is confirming what people already think of her-

"Haymitch get out." Finnick says angrily.

"I was just saying."

"I don't care just leave." He says.

Haymitch sighs and I can hear him walk away. Finnick strokes my hair again.

"He's crazy for thinking I would do something so terrible to you." Finnick mumbles. "None of them matter either, because they don't know her, the real her. Just like most of them don't know me." Finnick says. He gets up and leaves and I can hear him talking with Mags, probably about me. I hear the elevator ding and hear Aries and the tributes come in.

"Annie wake up!" Aries shouts.

I open my eyes and sit up slowly.

"You shouldn't be sleeping. You're supposed to be trying to figure out ways to help them." He motions towards Maddy and Chase.

"I'm sorry I must've dozed off but don't worry I thought of many ideas in my dreams." I smile.

Aries sighs but Maddy is smiling.

"How did it go?" I ask them.

"It was fine. Do you know where Luna is?" Chase sneers

"How could she, when she has been sleeping." Aries says.

They both leave and it is just Maddy and myself.

"How did it go?" I ask her.

"Okay I think." She says

"What did you show them?" I ask.

"I thought I wasn't supposed to tell."

"Oh… I think you're allowed to with your mentors. I did last year." I smile.

"I just threw some knives and put up some traps." She says "Do you think that is enough?" She asks worriedly.

"It sounds like it was and that sounds like what I did. I got a good score." I smile.

"I hope so." She says.

"Well there is nothing that can be done now. You did it, just be happy about that."

She smiles.

"I should probably shower, I don't like this training stuff." She says

I nod and she gets up to take her shower.

I sit here by myself for a few minutes and then Finnick comes out here.

"Hi." He says.

"Hi." I say and rest my head on his shoulder and hold his hand.

I hear someone clear their throat. I look up and notice it is Luna and she is shaking her head. Finnick let's go of my hand and I look at him confused.

"We're supposed to act professional remember." He says

"Until everyone is asleep then you can do _whatever_." Luna says.

"Chase was looking for you." I tell her.

She nods and heads towards his room.

"Were you okay while I was gone?" He asks me.

I nod.

"I liked being with Mags but, if I'm honest I mostly slept on this couch."

"I know. I saw you here when I came up." He says.

I nod. I knew this already but, he fails to mention that Haymitch was with him.

"Finnick?"

"Mmh?" He says

"How often do you see the other mentors."

"Depends... certain ones every day. Why do you ask?"

I shrug.

"I'm just curious what you do when you aren't with clients."

"Mostly boring stuff. Interviews of our own to talk about our tributes. Looking for sponsors and yes seeing the other mentors." He smiles.

"Sounds…

"It's usually boring." He says

"Are these other mentors your friends?" I ask.

He shrugs.

"I think acquaintances would be better. I only see them once a year after all."

"That's true." I say.

"I wouldn't wish harm to any of them though."

"I know you're a good person." I say. I want to kiss him but I'm not supposed to.

A few hours later they show the scores and they both did well. Chase got a ten and Maddy got an eight which is a good score. It is the lowest in the career pack but she will still be able to get sponsors.

Aries stopped worrying about that Johanna girl once he saw the two flash underneath her name. I think that is the lowest in Hunger Games history. How can someone get such a low score.

After this Finnick and I go to bed. I lay down and Finnick is finally allowed to hold me again. I feel safe when I am in his arms. I feel like nothing has hurt me and nothing will ever hurt me again.


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter 34**

The interviews are today and I'm still not allowed to leave. I will be watching it on the screen like every other citizen.

I head out to the common room and see Diana and Dean already to start their work on Maddy. I sit down on the couch and watch them get the supplies ready for her. I feel a tap on my shoulder and jump.

I see it is Finnick and he is almost laughing at me.

"Don't do that." I say.

"I'm sorry, truly I am." He says in a voice clearly not meaning it and I can tell he is trying not to laugh.

I roll my eyes.

"I don't think this is very _professional_ Mr. Odair." I tease.

"Oh right, my apologies Miss. Cresta."

"When are you leaving?" I ask him sadly. I know he will have a client soon.

"Trying to get rid of me already are we?" He teases.

"Finnick come on." I say.

"I only have one today and it is timed. It won't last longer than two hours." He smiles.

I nod not knowing what to say.

"Don't be sad this means I get to spend more time with you." He smiles.

I smile I don't want to ask how he can stay so positive because I think he himself doesn't know the answer.

"Don't you have to leave to do mentor business though?" I ask.

"Not really." He pauses "Tomorrow you have mentor business though."

"I thought I wasn't allowed to leave until the games were over." I say confused.

"No you leave when the games start to ensure you will be watching." He says disgusted.

"How will they know?" I ask confused.

"The hive." He says

"What's that?" I ask confused

"You'll see tomorrow. It's easier to see than explain."

"Is it bad?" I ask.

"I'll wait for you to decide." He says but, I think he knows my answer.

"But let's not worry about that now." He smiles.

"Okay." I smile and hug him not caring if this isn't _professional_ according to Luna's standards.

He rests his chin on my head and I pull him closer to me so he is as close as possible.

"I love you." I whisper into his chest.

He rubs my back.

"I love you but, I have to be going. Mentor stuff." He says before I can ask.

"Okay." I say and he kisses me cheek.

"Everyone else will be gone because of the makeup and stuff for Caesar's interviews. I will be back in an hour probably because a client will be coming to see me. Then everyone will come back shortly after I leave."

I nod.

"You'll be okay by yourself." He reassures me.

"I know." I say and kiss his lips soft and slow. He stops kissing me even though I wish he would never stop.

"Can't have anyone seeing us we have to act _professional_." he says holding in laughter.

I hug him once more tightly before he has to leave.

After he leaves we have a quick breakfast and like Finnick says everyone else follows suit and leaves.

I sit in the couch in the common room bored.

After thirty minutes I hear the elevator ding and wonder who it is. I don't think Finnick would be back this son.

"Oh Annie hello." She smiles Finnick's client who is early like the others. I get the feeling they come early so they can spend more time with him but, he is never here.

"Where is he?" She asks more demanding than the others.

"Doing mentor stuff." I say.

"And why aren't you?" She smiles.

"Someone has to stay behind." I smile awkwardly.

She sits next to me and is too close for comfort.

"Yes they do." She whispers in my ear and looks at me with fire in her eyes.

"I actually have something I need to be doing. I'm sure you will be fine by yourself." I tell her. I want to get away from her.

I get up but, she forcefully grabs my arm and pulls me back down.

"Where are you going?" She asks me.

"I have-

"If you want to leave Annie just say so. I can't make _you_ stay." She smiles.

I shiver I wonder if this is how they act around Finnick so forceful so demanding. I'm too busy thinking about this that I don't even notice when she gets close to me and starts to kiss me roughly. I can feel her tongue exploring my mouth and moving all the way to the back of throat, invading me.

I have only been kissed by two people and they were never this rough. Filled with passion yes but. always gentle and kind.

She stops kissing me and I back away from her gasping for air.

"It's too bad I can't buy you." She whispers "I have a feeling you would be lots of fun. You seem so innocent, I would love to change that." She smiles devilishly

"Stop leave me alone." I whimper with my chin trembling.

She smiles.

"I usually respect a ladies wish but, to see that no one else is here and Finnick is late-

"You're early." I say afraid.

"You say tomato I say tomato. Does it real matter, you should never keep a lady waiting." She smiles.

She runs her finger across my cheek and I look away.

"To think of all the things I would do to you." She says and places a hand on my inner thigh and kisses me again. I try to get her off of me but she is too forceful too strong. I can feel her hand moving up my thigh.

I hear the elevator ding but, she doesn't stop kissing me until someone takes her off me. I look up and see Finnick. Who else would it be.

"What are you doing?" He asks angry.

"Are you talking to me or her?" She says. She stokes my hair and I flinch.

"I'm talking to you, who else would it be? You have me not her and-

"That's only because I can't buy her! I got stuck with you!" She shouts.

"No one made you do this." Finnick spits back.

"You may have all the other Capitol girls fooled but, I only wanted her. Look at that perfect face, that perfect creamy skin. She is so much better than you. The only reason I bought you was to get to her." She says and strokes my hair. Her arm starts to move up my inner thigh and Finnick grabs her forcefully from the couch.

"You can't touch her! No one can!" Finnick shouts and the whole room is very quite, so quite that you could hear a pin drop.

I have never seen him so angry. It is completely justified but, it's strange.

The girl laughs a laugh that is very cold and causes goosebumps to form on my skin.

"I guess that is true." She looks back at me. Then to Finnick "Not even you." She smiles.

"Your time has started. Do you want to waste it sitting here talking or do _whatever_ you bought me for." He says angrily again

"Fine, you're coming back with me unless you want to take his place Annie." She smirks and says in an inviting.

"No she doesn't." Finnck says before I can answer.

"I believed I asked her." She smiles.

"That's not part of the deal." He snarls.

"Maybe, but if Snow saw how _satisfying_ she was with one client I think he might change his mind. Besides, I would love to be the first to take Annie."

I know what she is doing, she is manipulating me so I will do what she wants.

She starts to walk near me again but Finnick grabs her arm forcefully and tightly, so tight I think she might have bruises the next morning.

"You're wasting _your_ time."

She looks at his hand.

"Fine then let's go, oh and Annie you're just making it worse." She smiles. Finnick drags her to the elevator. I can hear her say something else but, I don't catch it.

I wonder what she is going to do to him. I wonder what she was going to do to me. I lie down on the couch and hold a pillow to my chest and start crying. Not because some stranger forcefully kissed me but, because I think this is what always happens when Finnick leaves to see people. That they are so forceful so demanding so rough. They don't care about him, they just see him as _their_ play thing to _own_ for a certain amount of time.

Used and abused for the rest of his life and this is a perfect example of something that was my fault because she wanted me. Not him.


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter 35**

Finnick makes it back to the room and he looks the same as he always does when he comes back from a client. He walks over to me and I can see he has a strange look in his eyes that isn't usually there.

"Are you okay Annie?" He asks me.

"I'm fine... what did she do to you?"

"Nothing that hasn't happened before, did she do anything to you?" Finnick asks. I can see fire in his eyes. I don't know why he is asking, it's not like he can do anything.

"She just kissed me." I look down at the ground.

"Is that all?" He asks. He still sounds furious. She did kiss me without my consent and not nicely either.

I nod.

"She wasn't nice." I say.

"I wouldn't expect _her _to be." He says.

"What does that mean?" I ask him.

"It doesn't matter." He says. "I should file a report." He mutters to myself.

"File a report?" I ask confused.

"There are a few rules Annie, not many. She broke one of them by touching you. Snow gave me his word that this wouldn't happen to you. She broke the rule so she will get the rightful... punishment."

"Don't get her killed." I say.

"Relax I don't want that. Snow wouldn't kill her. She'll probably get put on the list."

"The list?"

"People who are no longer able to purchase the products Snow is pushing."

"You mean victors?" I ask.

"He sells other things and other people." Finnick says.

"What else does he sell?" I ask.

"Does it matter?"

"Not really, I was just curious." I say.

"It's mostly people ,to always for sex sometimes just as slaves. It is also rare valuables, and various types of drugs, mostly illegal stuff. Ironic isn't it?" He smiles in disgust. "I know this client likes to buy drugs and people, putting her on the list will be punishment enough. " He says.

"Oh." I say and find my arms wrapping around him. I feel like crying because of how terrible all of this is.

"Come here." Finnick says. He takes my hand and takes me back to my room.

I sit down on the bed and he leans into me and wraps his arm around me.

"Are you okay?" He asks

"I'm fine." I say. Which is the truth, I don't care that, that girl kissed me. I just keep thinking about Finnick which causes a tear to fall down my cheek.

"Annie." He says comforting me and rubs my back. "Don't worry, you're safe here and no one will do anything like that again." He says.

"I don't care about that."

Finnick looks at me strangely.

"Then what's wrong?" He asks confused.

"You." I say.

He let's go of me thinking the wrong thing.

"No, not that." I say but, he doesn't put his arms back around me. "Is this how it always? Are they all that terrible?" I ask and start crying. He places his hands back on me and rubs my shoulder.

"No." He says

I look at him to see if he is telling the truth and I can tell he is.

He is looking at me probably wondering what else I will say but, I don't know what to say so he starts talking.

"She is part of a special group of clientele." He says.

"What does that mean?"

"Each client has different _desires _most of them are... normal but, Cynthia it typecasted in the group who likes things to be... different." He says carefully.

"Different what does that mean?" I ask. A part of me doesn't want to know the answer.

"Different." He says again.

"Is that all you can give me, different?" I ask.

"I don't want you to know." He says.

"Finnick-

"No." He says and I can tell this is the final word.

"Fine." I say angry.

What could she do that was so bad, he obviously isn't in a terrible amount of pain. The roughness of that kiss makes me think the rest would be like that. She said she could have fun with me because I was so innocent. It seemed like she got pleasure of seeing me scared. Her looking at Finnick's hand as he held tightly onto it made her smile. The way she left made me think she was going to torture him or something. It seemed like she wanted to torture me. Is that what her strange sexual desire is torturing people during or before sex. Why would she do that? Finnick doesn't look hurt, then again I can't see all of his body. Who knows what is underneath those clothes.

He looks at me.

"They like the pain. Inflicting it and receiving it. These clients usually want Enobaria."

"Why?" I ask.

"The teeth." He says nonchalantly.

"Oh." I say shocked. After she won she got her teeth filed into fangs because she won by ripping out the other tributes juggler. She is from District Two and volunteered. I'm not surprised about her getting the teeth. I can assume why they want her for that because those teeth could probably draw blood.

He doesn't need to explain any further. I don't really want him to.I hug him tighter and I think he knows I don't want or need to hear anymore. He kisses my forehead.

"I don't want you to leave." I whisper.

Finnick strokes my hair, my head is now on his lap. I know he has to leave but, I don't want to and I don't want to go watch the Hunger Games tomorrow. I don't want to watch people get murdered. I start crying at the thought.

"It's okay Annie." He whispers.

"I can't watch them. I can't watch that." I say.

"It will be alright, I will be right there. I won't have to leave you alone, not there." He says.

He leaves in a few hours because he has to go down for the interviews. I don't bother turning on the t.v I don't want to watch and for this I don't have to. That changes tomorrow though because I have to watch people fight to the death and see blood splatter. I close my eyes and see the blood splatter in my head. I go to the bathroom and get sick and stay there on the floor bawling my eyes out. I don't know if I passed out from anxiety or if I feel asleep all I do know is that when I wake up I am in my bed and Finnick is next to me. I feel safe.

* * *

"Let's go Annie." Finnick whispers in my ear and places a strand of hair behind my ear.

I nod.

The tributes left ten minutes ago and we have to head down to where we view the games. Finnick calls it the hive he says I will know why when I see it. We head to the elevator and Finnick grabs my hand like he did when he took me down to get sent into the arena. He presses the _GF _button which is the same floor where the training center is.

We don't say anything this is the first time I have been out of that room and all of the people are a little overwhelming or it could be because I don't want to be here.

Finnick stops in front of a door and then opens it and know we are in the hive. I understand why he calls it that now because it looks like a beehive. It is made from shiny metal that has a blue tint to it. It is wider on the bottom and gets smaller as the floors go up. I notice there are twelve floors I'm assuming one for each District but, they aren't all the same size. I wonder if it is better to be in a bigger section or a smaller one, I guess I'm about to find out.

Before we enter though a device pops up in front of the door. Finnick places his hand on it and it scans it, I think it injects something into him. It turns green and the doors open for him.

"What is it?" I ask afraid.

"It's scanning your DNA and then it will inject a drug into you so you can stay awake until our tributes are dead." He says.

I don't do anything maybe because I'm too afraid. Finnick touches my hand and places it on the scanner.

"Annie Cresta Victor of 70th Hunger Games District Four." A robotic voice says and then I feel a slight pinch and the door turns green and opens for me to walk through.

We walk through and we are on the first floor I see ones everywhere and some of the victors from One. They have lots of screens and they all have different camera angles for the arena. It looks like they also have a large list of things that they can purchase with their sponsor money.

I look up and see the structure of the hive. There is a giant beam in the middle and all twelve floors are being supported by it. If you would stand in the center I'm sure you would get a good view of all of them. I see an elevator off to the side and Finnick leads us that way. The doors open and I notice there are no buttons. I'm about to ask why but, then a device pops out and Finnick presses him thumb to it.

"District 4." A robotic voice says. One pops out in front of me and I do the same thing he did.

"District 4." The voice repeats.

The elevator gets shot up and in less than a minute it opens and we are on our floor. I can see fours everywhere and it is not as big as District One's floor but, it is still a decent size. We have four desks, I'm assuming one for each mentor. I didn't count to see how many the people from One had. We have less screens and less views of camera angles and it looks like our list for buying things is shorter too. Finnick walks off to one of the desks but, I walk to the rail near the opening of the structure.

I look up and can see the floors get smaller and smaller as I could already tell but, from what I can see they also have less equipment to use. It looks like the bigger the floor the bigger the advantage. I can see up to District Six and it is pretty small. I wonder what District Twelve looks like.

Finnick comes back over here and touches my hand.

"You need to be registered to a desk." He says.

"What?" I say confused.

"It's to monitor to see how much you do." He says.

"What if I don't do anything, will I get in trouble?" I ask nervously.

"No, you won't get in trouble but, you should at least mess with your screen. Don't worry it will be right next to mine." He tells me.

He takes my hand and walks me over to a desk. It is just a desk there is nothing special about it or on it.

"Sit down." Finnick tells me.

"Why?"

"Just do it Annie." He tells me gently.

I do and screens and a keyboard pop out. The screens look like they are made out of glass and the keyboard looks like it is a hologram. There are three screens. They are all a decent size they just have Four's on the screen circling around in the middle.

"What now?" I ask him.

"Just wait." He tells me.

In a minute the screen flashes to life and something is scanning me again. The screens then says my name, district, and year I won. The screens start to change and each one is different.

"That one is going to zone in on Maddy." He says and presses the screen it is a touch screen and does something when he touches it. I can see his name on the screen now too.

"That one will show Chase and that one will show money flow from the sponsors, there will always be a supply list on the left hand side. Anyone can buy anything at any time. As long as we have the money." He explains.

"That's why I got the REGRow from Luna."

He nods.

"She is smart, I didn't think of it." He says.

"That's pretty much it." He says.

"Wait, what are those screens for?"

I point to the seven screens on the wall.

"Those show all the views of the arena. When the games start there will be a hologram in the hole of the hive. It will be projecting what Panem is seeing. This way we will always see what the most _entertaining _thing is going on in the arena." He says.

I nod.

I hear the elevator open and see it is Mags and Luna back from bringing the tributes to their tubes. They get themselves situation at their own desk.

_Mentors lockdown will begin in 60 59 58..._

"What's lockdown?" I ask nervously.

"They are locking us in so we can't leave until our tributes are dead." Luna says.

_30, 29, 28... _

"That doesn't seem safe."

"Annie relax if there was an emergency they would let us out besides, they give us the necessities we need." Finnick says gently.

A red light starts to flash and I hear a loud cranking noise.

_10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Lockdown initiated the 71st Hunger Games will start in five minutes. _A voice says.

"So we just wait then?" I ask.

"Correct." Mags says.

I feel myself shaking a little.

Finnick walks over to me.

"Annie, don't worry it will be fine." He whispers in my ear.

"I don't feel fine."

"Don't worry you don't have to look at the screens." Finnick tells me.

"I'm locked in here 24/7 and you said I won't be able to sleep. I will have to look at them eventually Finnick." I say annoyed.

"You're right but, maybe try and avoid the blood bath and don't worry I'll be right next to you." He says and kisses my forehead.

I nod. I don't know what to say.

The hologram screen in the middle starts to show us the arena. This is what all of Panem is seeing, I notice Mags, Luna, and Finnick aren't looking at this projection but, the ones on the walls. I just look at the one in the middle. The arena is nothing special this year, it is mostly all woods but, that probably means the gamemakers will have lots of traps up their sleeves.

They start to countdown and I know I should stop looking at the screen because I don't want to see the blood flying everywhere but, just like I knew I should've looked away at my recaps I don't look away now and I soon regret it.

I see knives, swords, axes, arrows, and more weapons going lots of places. I see blood flying everywhere and people dying left and right. They zone in on the tribute from One wielding a mace and they shove it right into the face of another tribute. I'm reminded of Dan and his head flying off. I start to hear a screaming noise, thinking it is coming from the screens but, it's not. It's coming from me.


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter 36**

"It's okay Annie." Finnick soothes me. "You're safe here."

I know this but, I start crying anyways. I can hear blood splatter and screams of people getting murdered. I grasp onto Finnick as if my life depended on it and bury my face in his chest and cry loudly.

"It's alright Annie." He kisses my forehead and strokes my hair. "Shhh it's alright."

You can hear my screams and sobs because this place echoes. I wonder if that is so we can hear one another.

"Shut up!" I hear someone yell from below us. I have a feeling it was someone from One or Two. I don't think the people from Three care.

One of our screens start glowing green at the top, then the picture changes. I see it is Cashmere from One.

"Odair!" I hear her shout. Finnick glances over at her even though I have an iron grip on him.

"What do you want Cashmere?" He asks. He sounds angry.

"Keep her quiet or I will after this is over. We all know it was her. cra-

Mags presses a button and we can no longer hear what she is saying. She is still talking though and I catch her calling me something from below. I wonder if the other victors say this as well. I remember what Haymitch said to Finnick how people throw around the word crazy.

Cashmere fades away and I see the outline turn green again and I notice a two flashing.

"Just disable the video feed. I have a feeling this will happen again." Luna says.

Mags presses a button and it goes back to showing the arena.

"Do they all say that?" I whisper to Finnick.

Finnick takes my hand and we walk to the other side of the room further away from Mags and Luna. Probably so they can't hear us.

"Say what?" He asks clearly knowing what I meant. He probably heard her too.

"You know what Finnick, do they all say that instead of Annie Cresta they just say…" I don't want to say it.

"It doesn't matter what they call you, Annie these people don't matter. None of them matter." He tells me.

"They all say it then." I say with my chin trembling and a few tears roll down my face.

"No, mostly the people from One and Two and other victors who are just cynical. Not everyone is bad, just look at Luna." He says. I understand what he means she doesn't look very friendly and yet she has her moments. Mags said she volunteered but doing this softened her. I get the feeling that she might call me that though.

"Do you think that Finnick…do you think I'm crazy?" I ask

"Of course not." He says and kisses my cheek. Which still has tears on it.

"I want to believe you, especially after hearing your talk with Haymitch but-

"Talk with Haymitch?" He pauses. "You were awake." He says. He doesn't sound very surprised maybe he knew.

"Even he thinks I've lost it. I bet he calls me crazy Cresta too." I say.

"Haymitch doesn't call you that."

"I bet he thinks it. I bet they all do... even you Finnick."

"No, I don't." He says and hugs me. "I don't think that Annie. I never have and I never will. No matter what happens. I love you. That is something that will always be true." He says and kisses my forehead.

My chin is trembling and I start crying. I don't know if it is what Finnick is saying or the crazy Cresta nickname but, I do believe him.

"One thing is also true Annie." He says and I look up at him fresh tears on my face and on his shirt.

"I need you." He says. I push him closer to me and he rubs my back. I don't know how long he hugs me before I let go. He holds onto my hand and walks us to the desks. He presses some buttons on my screen and the video feeds shrink so I can barely see them.

He smiles.

"There, that's better." He says and places my hair behind my ear and kisses me.

"I guess." I say. I think of Maddy though. So kind and innocent. I feel like if I didn't help her I would be letting her down and I will feel guilty. I can't sit in the corner crying for the whole time. These games usually last a few weeks.

I tap the screen that is supposed to be showing Maddy and it goes back to the normal size. She is with the careers even though she doesn't trust them, just like me. I hope she knows that she should run away when her instincts tell her to. No one should get too comfortable in this _game_.

"What are you doing?" Finnick asks me.

"I like her. If I don't do anything I will feel worse if she… doesn't win." I say.

Finnick nods and kisses my cheek. He doesn't go to his desk. They are far apart from one anyone probably because certain tributes want to be trained individually.

The cannons start to go off and the wall projects the dead tributes just like in the arena except after the canons are finished a number stays on the wall.

"Interesting." Luna says.

"What?" Mags asks

"That girl from seven is still alive. I thought she would die in the blood bath, especially after that two." Luna says.

"She could've just ran away not bothering to get supplies." I say.

"Possibly." Luna says.

I notice on the wall it is projecting the number 15 that many people didn't die.

Luna sees my gaze.

"Number left."

"Oh." I say.

"Should we hunt or camp first?" One of the careers ask. They don't know which tributes are dead yet, expect the ones they killed. I suppose they could've killed all of them. I shiver at the thought.

"Camp, we should go hunting at night when people have their guard down." Chase says.

They start to divvy out the supplies and put them into three piles: food, medical supplies, and weapons.

They sit for a while and I hear a noise that sounds like cogs moving.

I look at Finnick but he isn't looking at me he is looking at the screen that all of Panem is seeing. I let go of his hand so he can walk over to the other screens. I know he wants to. He looks at me strangely.

"It's okay go ahead." I tell him and he kisses my forehead.

The room starts to be full of echoes of people talking about what they think this means. It is obviously something, maybe they are changing the outline of the arena. A room full of victors all trying to guess what it is from their experience is making this interesting. I wonder what everyones theory is.

I keep looking to the screen that all of Panem is seeing rather than all the camera angles. Which is what Luna, Mags, and Finnick seem to be more interested in. But this is important so I think they would show it on that screen. They are showing the boy from three. He is walking and he is deep in the forrest probably one of the safer places. He steps somewhere and then the cog noises stop.

"I guess it was nothing." He says.

I don't think that is true though.

I tune everything and everyone out except the screen of Panem.

"Why are they showing you." I whisper.

A tunnel is there at the wall that wasn't before. The boy doesn't notice this. I see a silver tube that is aimed at the arena. Not at him but, in general. It is going to release something. It does and a little silver ball falls out.

The kid hears this noise and walks toward it like a rational person would in a normal situation but this isn't a normal situation.

Finnick is standing behind me now and looking at what I am.

"What do you think it is?" He asks me.

"Nothing good."

"Doesn't that resemble a parachute?" I ask.

"It does, it's a trap." I hear Mags say.

I nod.

The kid is near it but, from a distance he probably can't see the blinking green light. He probably thinks it is a parachute. The light starts to blink rapidly and then suddenly it stops.

"That was anticlimactic." I say. Before anyone can respond there is a white hot light and everything around it is destroyed. They make sure to get a nice close up of the boy turning into a skeleton and then a pile of ash. You hear the cog sound again and the tube goes away.

"Interesting." I hear Luna say. You can hear the echoes of all the mentors again.

"What do you think it means?" Finnick asks.

"The gamemakers were probably just releasing something." Luna says.

"I don't think so. It doesn't usually makes that noise and the tributes could clearly hear it. It's part of the arena." I say.

"What do you think it is?" Luna asks.

I look at where the boy was, where the weapon went off and it was only restrained in that one area. I would think a weapon like that could take out a decent amount of the arena, possibly half with how small it is. So why is it only in a small circle that the boy was standing in? Are there traps like this all over the arena? Or was it just some random thing that happened. I don't know but, I'm sure it won't take long for me to figure out.


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter 37**

It's day three and there are fourteen left. The only person who died after the blood bath was the boy who got incinerated by the trap from the gamemakers. Nothing strange has happened no cog noises since. Luna thinks it was just the gamemakers trying to create more entertainment but, I don't think that is the case because it happened on day one which is always action packed.

We haven't had to send anything to Maddy and Chase because they are dong just fine by themselves. They are just hunting in the forest... for people.

"You guys think we should go left or right?" Chase asks.

One of the careers stops and looks at the ground I think they are trying to track something.

"I see footprints that lead to the left, we should head that way better to catch prey." He says with a smile

They all look impressed by, his ability to track. It doesn't surprise me because they are trained to do this. They follow the footprints left and head towards a tribute.

Finnick is looking at the other screens and I can see one that is showing the tribute they are close to.

Finnick's hand finds mine easily, he must know what I'm thinking. I'm thinking about the tribute they are going to kill. They start to get closer to the tribute and my grip tightens. Finnick looks up at me.

"Why don't you go to the lounge." Finnick tells me.

Finnick was right about them giving us the necessities we need. There is a hidden room that has a lounge and the same devices they have in the suites you can order food with. However, they only have one screen where you can view the games. While you're in here you can't really help them. I asked Finnick if he knows what the other floors look like and he says he doesn't and no one is allowed to go on the floors that isn't there's. This is why they scan your thumbprint instead of have you press a button. Apparently if you try to get off at a different floor it won't let you. It creates an invisible barrier. He does say that probably most of the Districts don't have a lounge and probably just the device to order food and a bathroom. He also thinks District Twelve's floor is probably as big as our bathroom which has three stalls and two sinks. He says Haymitch doesn't care as long as he can order alcohol. I don't think it matters because the tributes from Twelve almost always die in the bloodbath.

"No, I'm fine." I tell him.

"Okay." He says and kisses my hand.

The boy tribute runs deeper into the forest and you can hear the cogs moving again.

"You think he is going to blow up?" I ask Finnick.

He shrugs.

"Who knows what the gamemakers have planned."

After a few minutes I hear an eerie noise that sounds like a high pitched humming almost like birds but, sounds more... demonic.

"What is that?" I ask.

"No idea." Finnick says.

"It sounds like something that will attack." Mags says.

The tribute in question looks afraid by the sound and start to move away but, the sound is everywhere and gets louder as they walk deeper into the forest.

The careers start to get closer to the tribute and the noise increases as each one steps into the area.

"What is this?" One of the female tributes practically shout because the noise is so loud.

"No, idea." Another says.

"I think we should leave." Maddy says.

"No, a tribute was this way we are very close." The one who can track says.

"This doesn't seem safe it is like a warning to leave." She says.

"Then go Maddy you're just dead weight anyways." Chase sneers. She looks afraid.

I look at another screen and see a bunch of bugs come from a portal of the side of the arena.

"Fine I'll go." Maddy says and runs in the opposite direction and the sound lessons a bit.

"It has to do with the people in the area." I say.

"What makes you say that?" Finnick asks.

"Because the sound of the bugs went down when Maddy left." I say.

"I don't-

I start to hear one of the tributes screaming they are surrounded by the bugs. They are starting to eat his flesh and the cannon goes off shortly. The other bugs are heading towards the careers. The bugs were so loud that they didn't hear the dead tributes screams.

The bugs reach the careers and start to savor their flesh, Chase and the tributes from Two get away with him and the tributes from one both die. Once they leave the area is back to normal again and you hear the cogs.

"What the hell was that?" Luna asks.

"As I said I think it has to do with the people in the area. The sounds of the bugs got louder when the careers entered and soften a bit when Maddy ran off."

"So what you think it's a motion detector or something?" Luna asks.

"I have no idea." I say.

"We will just have to wait and see." Finnick says.

"AHHHHHH." I hear a loud scream and turn my head to the screen that all of Panem is seeing.

I see a female tribute bashing another one against a tree violently." The tribute is starting to bleed heavily.

"How are you..." They trail off and she bangs her against a tree hard one more time and a branch goes through her neck. A cannon blows and I start to feel dizzy. I think from all of the blood.

When the tribute turns around I notice it is that girl who got a two for her training score.

"What the hell." Luna says shocked.

Johanna starts to go through the girls things. She had a backpack which is very generous; it has medical supplies, some dried food, and a small amount of water. She opens a pouch from the pack and has a devilish smile on her face.

"Now we're talking." She says and pulls out a pack of knives. "Why wouldn't you be carrying this sweet thing." She says and squeezes the dead triubtes cheeks.

"Damn, she was holding out big time." Finnick says.

"Time to go teach these bastards a lesson." Johanna smiles and runs off.

I can hear voices coming from above us and I think it the people from seven.

"Sounds like they didn't know either." Luna says looking up.

"I must say I'm impressed." Finnick says.

I'm starting to get dizzier and the room is spinning. I think I would faint if I was able to.

"Annie. What's wrong?" Finnick asks me concerned. He starts saying other things but, his voice is muffled and I can't understand what he is saying. I'm not really aware of my surrounding but, I can tell Finnick is taking me somewhere, once we reach the detestation he sits me down and strokes my hair. I don't do anything though, I think my body is frozen maybe, from fear but, I don't feel afraid.

After awhile the room stops spinning and I become more aware of my surroundings. Finnick took me to the lounge and I am sitting on the purple sofa that is facing the t.v set.

Finnick is holding my hand and making small circles with his thumb.

I turn my head very fast to look at him.

"Can you hear me?" Finnick asks gently.

I nod my head and hug him.

"How long have I been sitting here?" I whisper.

"A few hours." He says and kisses my forehead.

"But why?" I ask.

He shrugs.

"I don't know but, you're okay."

I notice that it is very quiet in here. I realize that Finnick put the games on mute.

"Couldn't you have turned them off?" I whisper

"I can't, they want us to watch." He says sadly. "But, your okay." He says stroking my hair and kissing my cheek.

"What has happened?"

"Nothing really." He says.

"No, deaths?"

"No." He says and kisses my cheek again.

"What about that girl?" I ask almost afraid. I don't know why I'm so afraid of her maybe it is because I felt sorry for her and to see her be a ruthless killer has messed with my mind.

"Don't worry about her, okay." He says and places a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Do you think she will win?" I whisper.

"She has he upper hand because they all think she is weak, why?" He asks.

"Just curious." I say.

"Do you not want her to win?" Finnick asks me. He doesn't have judgement in his voice or on his face but, I think he is judging me.

"I don't know. I'm not rooting for anyone because that is wrong."

He nods.

"It will be okay." He says. I lean into him and he puts my arm around me. I don't want to leave, I don't want to move from this sofa but, I know in a few minutes I will have to get up and leave the room to go and mentor.

"I love you." I whisper to Finnick.

He kisses my forehead.

"I love you too."


	38. Chapter 38

**Chapter 38**

There are eleven people left and the careers are tracking people to kill but so is the girl from Seven. She was definitely holding out on what she could do. Finnick was right she does have the upper hand.

I look to the screen Panem is seeing and they are showing someone running. When they hit a spot the cogs start again and mist comes from the ground.

"Poison?" Luna asks.

"Not necessarily." Mags says.

The careers are in the same section and none of the tributes don't seem to notice it.

"It could just be fog."

I get three pairs of eyes looking at me with doubt. I know they are right, nothing in the arena is normal. Nothing did happen to them but, the other tribute got mauled by the careers.

"Ten left." Luna says.

"Fourteen dead." I whisper. Finnick squeezes my hand. I think he is the only person who heard.

I see the Johanna girl chasing a tribute who looks twelve and terrified.

They keep running and then the cog sound starts again. Nothing seems to happen until you start to see the tributes reflection everywhere.

"Mirrors?" I ask.

"That's what it looks like." Luna says.

The twelve year old sprints away but Johanna has trouble figuring out the trap. She keeps running into the mirrors. She takes out her knives and starts breaking the mirrors to get out of the maze.

She can sill see the twelve year old as if taunting her.

"Where are you!" She shouts in anger.

The kid disappears and so does his reflection.

Johanna picks up her knives and the camera angle changes to the careers wondering around. They are where Johanna killed the girl with the tree, her pool of blood is still there. I find this strange because they usually clean that up when they take the body.

"Looks like someone had fun." Chase says.

"Yeah loads of it but where's the body?" The boy from Two asks. The girl from Two is still running towards them. She walks into the blood puddle and falls down in it like it is a lake. She tries to get up but something is pulling her down. You hear her scream and then she disappears. Then you can hear the cogs and the blood puddle disappears

"What the hell?" Finnick and Chase say at the same time

The boy from Two is looking up at the sky.

"One less to worry about." Chase says.

"She's not dead." The boy from Two says

I look to the wall where the number still reads ten.

"What?" Chase says confused.

"There was no cannon. She was probably transported somewhere."

"Where? How?" Chase asks confused.

"Beats the shit outta me. Let's just keep going." He says.

The camera angle changes and it shows the girl coming out of the ground and is almost in front of Johanna.

Johanna backs away probably wondering what the hell it is. The girl is covered head to toe in blood. Johanna stops and looks at the tribute puzzled.

"Doesn't matter what you are, just in chase." She says and shoves her knife into the tributes neck then a cannon goes off.

"Tribute then." She mutters

She takes her hands and starts to wipe away the blood to see what the girl had on her. She smiles when she uncovers the weapon that was drenched in blood.

"I'll take that." She smiles as she wipes off the blood of the axe.

"Well if we could bet I would bet all my money on her." I hear someone from a different floor say. I roll my eyes

"She's going to win." Luna says.

"Not necessarily Luna." Mags says.

"Why is that?" She asks slightly annoyed.

"Always account for variable change."

Luna rolls her eyes.

Johanna gets up after taking the girls stuff but, makes the mistake of steeping in her blood and falls somewhere as well.

"You think it's like that all over the arena now?" I ask

"Probably." Finnick says.

When Johanna appears she is near the boy who was trying to run away from her earlier.

He sees her and gets up but not quick enough because Johanna throws her axe at him and lands right in his forehead. She retrieves her axe but is careful not to step in his blood.

She runs away and then most of the tributes make camp and head to sleep.

Most of the tributes are asleep and are far away from one another. However, you hear the cog noise and they show a tribute that was in the same area as the deadly bugs. The bone chilling screams start and the tribute is dead within ten minutes.

"Nine left." Luna says and gets up from her desk and heads to the lounge. She usually does in the night time because there is almost no action. However, she stops once she hears Chase and the boy from Two talking.

"Why can't we sleep? It's been five hours." Chase snarls.

"Probably the gamemakers." Tribute from Two says.

"You think it was the fog?" I ask.

"That would make sense." Finnick says.

"It could be something similar they inject into us. However it probably won't work the same considering the conditions they are in." Luna says.

"What?" I ask confused.

"Annie please everything they give us has that drug in it so we are always awake. The food and the water both have it and the reason they lock us in here is so they can pump it in the air supply."

"Then what is the injection for?"

"To get the ball rolling if you would, and so we don't OD on the stuff." Luna smiles.

I shiver.

"It's okay Annie." Finnick says and glares at Luna who flashes a smile at him.

He smooths my hair and kisses my forehead.

"Okay." I whisper.

Finnick hugs me.

"It's okay." He says again.

I hear a door open and know Luna has left the room.

"Is that true Finnick?" I ask.

"They don't tell us but, it is a conspiracy theory that most of the victors have. There is no proof to back it up though."

I nod.

"I want to go home." I whisper

"I know, I know but, it's almost over there's only nine left."

"But then twenty-three people will be dead." I whisper into his chest.

Finnick hugs me tighter.

I think it is because he doesn't know what to say.

* * *

It's morning and Chase and the boy from Two didn't sleep a wink. Mags and myself think the fog was some sort of insomnia gas. If you don't sleep for awhile it can drive you insane.

A loud blaring noise goes off that sounds like a blow horn. I'm expecting an announcement but one doesn't come but, the sound of the cogs do.


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter 39 **

All of the tributes bolt up at the sound of the blowhorn. You hear the cogs and a blaring light that cuts the arena into four perfect squares and there are more then one tribute in each section.

"You think this is for the finale?" I ask Finnick.

"There is only nine left it seems a bit premature but, who knows what the gamemakers are thinking." He smiles at me.

Nothing seems to effect them, they just go about their day as usual. There were no kills today and the tributes make camp and just like the previous days the boy from Two and Chase cannot sleep. It has been three days since they have had a full days rests, they are both very irritable. I think they will eventually kill one another. I think that was the plan behind the insomnia gas.

They walk around for a while and Chase starts screaming and talking about something that isn't there.

"He's starting to have micro naps." Luna says.

"What are those?" Finnick asks.

"It's when your body sleeps for a few minutes without you being aware of it." Mags explains.

"Then why isn't that happening to us?" I ask.

"Probably has to do with the drug they give us. They are very clever Annie. I mean they practically own us." Luna smiles but I can see the sadness in her eyes and I know she is true, they do own us.

I see Maddy, she hasn't been getting much Panem screen time but, I have seen her on the other screens. She mostly hides and runs away when people get to close. She is smart and she had a decent amount of supplies when she ran off because she didn't want to leave anything at the cornucopia just in case. She didn't trust them at all and she shouldn't have because they are bloodthirsty killers. I think she might have a chance at winning this, after all that is pretty much all I did. She usually travels in the night time when people are sleeping which is what she is doing now.

She is walking carefully but, then runs straight into something.

"What did she run into?" I ask. It's not like they know the answer but, I don't want her to die. I like Maddy.

"No, idea Annie." Mags smiles at me.

I notice that she is now on the screen Panem views. Something is going to happen and I have a feeling it has to do with the gamemakers splitting the arena into four parts.

Maddy gets up but runs into something again. She stands up and places her hand on it and it is like a glass wall. She bangs on it maybe to try and break it. The banging noise multiples by ten and I'm sure the whole arena heard where she is.

"They got them boxed in." Finnick says.

"Why four sections though?" Luna asks

"No idea." He says.

Maddy backs away and runs in the direction she just came in which was a bad idea because she runs right into Johanna.

"Hey Four." She smiles "Haven't seen you since the bloodbath where are you little _friends_." Johanna. All the pretenses I had for Maddy winning have gone away. I know Johanna is going to murder her and I don't want to watch her do it.

"They weren't my friends."

She smiles.

"Did you kill the ones from One then." Johanna says running her finger over the blade of her axe.

"If she lies Johanna might make an alliance with her." Luna says.

"Doubtful, she is in it to win it." A male voice says from below. It must be from Two because I'm sure the mentors from One are long gone.

Luna grabs the railing and looks down.

"Shut up that Johanna killed your female tribute anyways."

"She is about to kill yours too Luna." He shouts and I can almost hear the smile on his face.

I shiver.

"Yes." Maddy says but, it isn't very convincing.

"You're a terrible liar." Johanna says and swings her axe at her but Maddy dodges it.

"If she has any brains she will use the barrier against Johanna, she doesn't know it's there." Luna says.

"That is true." Finnick says.

"I'm really sorry about killing you and all but, there is only one winner." Johanna smiles and waves it around again but, Maddy dodges again. It looks like she is going in a circle maybe she is going to use the barrier against Johanna. She turns Johanna around and then charges her right into the wall and holds a knife to her neck.

They look at each other for a moment.

"Just get it over with." Johanna snarls. Maddy has her in a hold that Johanna won't be able to escape but, Maddy's hand is shaking.

"I can't do it." She whimpers and I can see a tear roll down her cheek. "I'm not a murderer." She says again.

"Good grief." Johanna says. Maddy's grasp must have loosened because Johanna tackles her and she is now on top of her.

"You may not be a murderer but, I am." Johanna says and stabs her and then her cannon blows instantly. She get off of Maddy and sits up.

"I'm sorry." She says looking at her. "You were never going to win because you were too good and the good ones don't win this _usually_." She says. I get the feeling that, that is a dig at me somehow. She does sound genuine though, maybe this Johanna girl isn't all bad. In the arena you can't listen to your conscious if you want to live.

On the main screen it is showing Chase and the boy from Two probably because they are the only tributes that are awake.

"Can't we stop walking?" Chase asks.

"Why?" the boy from Two grumbles.

"Because I'm tired." Chase sneers.

"Well, so am but, sitting isn't going to make us fall asleep."

"I'm sick of this." Chase says.

"Here it comes." Luna whispers. I know what she means. This is when they are going to kill one another because of the lack of sleep. It was only a matter of time and the micro naps probably weren't helping.

Chase throws a knife and the boy from Two goes down. Chase however, makes the mistake of stepping in his blood and he is being transported somewhere.

He rolls out of the blood and then starts to hear the screeching and knows where he is. He gets up to run but, runs into the invisible wall. He pounds on it making the loud noise but, it doesn't matter because in minutes the bugs reach him and he is dead.

_District 4 eliminated. _

I hear a robotic voice come from the ceiling and the elevator doors open.

"What happens now? Do we just go back to the suite?" I ask looking to Finnick and grasping his hand tightly.

"Not, exactly." Finnick says.

Finnick walks me to the elevator I try to walk into it but, get bounced out by a forcefield.

"Sorry, I forgot. You have to scan your hand to get whatever they injected into us out, then you can leave." Finnick says.

I put my hand on the scanner and I can feel something ripping out of my skin.

"Ouch." I say and look at my hand.

Finnick smiles at me and I'm allowed to enter the elevator. Finnick comes in, I hold his hand and rest my head on his shoulder.

"Why don't I feel tired?" I ask.

"You will in seventy two hours." Luna says. "I don't know why." She says before I can ask.

"What... so we have to watch for three more days?"

"Yes." Mags says.

Finnick squeezes my hand and I look up at him.

"Don't worry Annie, it's not that bad." Finnick says.

"Why can't we just stay in here?"

"They want us to socialize." Finnick rolls his eyes.

"You mean talk with the other victors?" I ask nervously.

"Don't worry Annie they aren't all bad and you can just avoid them and stay with me." Finnick says and kisses my forehead.

I hear Marina stifle a scoff though. I think that means Finnick is lying to me to make me feel better. I am the new victor and according to Haymitch I have been the talk between the victors after all they call me crazy Cresta. I shiver, I don't want to see that Cashmere girl but, I get the sinking feeling she will be the first one I will see.


	40. Chapter 40

**Chapter 40**

The elevator stops and when the doors open I can hear talking and laughing. I am assuming these are the other victors.

We enter the room and we are enveloped in a big room, it is similar to the lounge they had on our floor. It has the same purple sofas and couches but, there are more of them. There is also a crystal chandler hanging from the ceiling and tables of food but they also have the ordering devices you can order food with. They also have screens everywhere showing the games. I can tell they muted this, probably so we can talk with each other.

I grasp Finnick's hand tightly.

"Are these all if them?" I whisper.

"Mostly." He says.

I nod. I feel like crying all of a sudden.

"It's alright Annie." Finnick whispers as if sensing this.

I want to tell him I want to go home even though it will do no good.

"Finnick-

I get cut off by the person I didn't want to see, Cashmere. Her hair is a waterfall of gold and she has very fair skin. She also has gleaming blue eyes. I will admit she is very pretty but the scowl on her face isn't doing her any favors.

"Nice to see you again Annie." She says and runs her fingers across my collar bone causing my body to stiffen.

I did see her on the Victory Tour _see_ being the key word. I didn't talk with her she jut kept looking at me. I did talk briefly with her brother. He seemed distant and quiet. I wouldn't say he was nice but, at least he kept a distance. I don't think Cashmere will be doing the same.

"I-I guess." I say.

"It's too bad I was looking forward to getting to talk to you while here but, you've been cooped up it's a shame really." She says to me but is looking at Finnick.

"S-sorry." I mutter.

She smiles.

"No apologies are necessary Annie. I was wondering why they have you all locked up in there."

"Cashmere" Finnick says in a warning tone.

"Relax Finnick we are just getting to know one another." She smiles.

An Avox comes over and hands Finnick something.

"I will be right back." Finnick says. He walks away and whispers in my ear 'don't listen to her'.

I smile awkwardly at her praying she will leave me alone.

"So-

"I really just wanted to know one thing Annie." She says.

"O-okay."

"Is it true what they say you know that you're _crazy_."

"I don't know what you're talking about." I mutter.

She looks at me for a minute smiles and then leaves.

I sigh in relief.

I just stand here probably with a deer in headlights look all over my face.

"Miss. Annie." I hear a man say.

I turn around expecting an authority figure yelling at me for not being so sociable but it's not. It's Beetee Latier. The person who invents virtually everything that is signficant in Panem. I think he was always brilliant but, him winning the Hunger Games gave him the spotlight. He won by electrocuting multiple tributes. He probably wasn't the obvious choice but, sometimes being smart pays off. He doesn't look as intimating as Cashmere does. He is older and he has a sort of mad scientist look because of his glasses.

"Hello..." I trail off not know what to call him.

"I was hoping I would get to speak with you." He says in a very formal voice and is looking at me like I am something to study. I remember what Haymitch said and I suddenly don't feel good.

"Really and why is that?" I ask nervous.

"Because you're the new victor and I haven't been able to speak with you."

"Oh." I say.

"Yes also what do you think about District 4?"

"What?" This catches me off guard why would he want to ask me about home.

"You know fishing it's all very water based."

"That's actually a preconceived notation of home because it is fishing. All the houses aren't just on a beach front and it isn't sunny all the time." I say.

"Well I was just wondering with the water and all."

"Water?" I ask.

"You did almost drown I would wonder what effect that would have on the psyche. I have a great imagination but, I don't see this very often-

He keeps talking but I stop listening to him. I don't care or want to know what he is saying about me. I try to find a place to stare but all I see is the screens of the video.

"Leave me alone!" I end up shouting and can feel the whole room looming this way.

"Just leave me alone." I whisper and walk away to a nook and lean against the wall. Everything seems to carry on like usual. I press my knees to my chest and start to cry. I can hear someone walking towards me. I don't want it to be anyone but Finnick.

"It's alright Annie." I hear Mags say to me.

I look up and can see her smiling at me.

"I want to go home." I whispers

"You will be soon." She says.

"I hate it here. I hate all of them." I say.

"Why would you say that?" She asks confused.

"Because of what happened here."

"I understand why you hate this place Annie I think most the victors hate this place. What I meant was why would you say you hate all of them."

"Because they all think I am crazy. They are just like Cashmere."

"Cashmere is in the pool who likes to be here. Don't listen to her."

"Well what about-

"Beetee doesn't see human life the same as most people because he spends most of his time with machines. He bases most of his basic life details on what will work the best and has the best viable choice. If he had to choose the people to save in this room it wouldn't be on a whim it would be because he is choosing the people he thinks are the most valuable-

"And how does one decipher which life is more valuable than they rest?" I ask disgusted.

"I don't know but it doesn't matter. What I'm trying to say is when he sees a problem he wants to probe and obsess over it until it is fixed."

"So I'm the thing he wants to _fix_."

"I think that is his goal however, he is wasting his time because you don't need to be fixed Annie."

"Okay." I say and roll my eyes.

"Annie you are stronger than you think you are. You don't need to be fixed. You are the same person you always have been." She says.

"No, I'm not. Sometimes I can't tell if this is a terrible _fantasy_ or real life."

"Well you eventually can figure it out."

"Not without help." I mutter.

"There's nothing wrong with getting help Annie." She smiles.

"Getting help yes... relying on someone to always do it though isn't right."

"No it's not. We aren't meant to live in solitude we are meant to be with others." She says.

"That doesn't matter because it's like someone else has a road map to my head. I live in a different world sometimes and it's usually not a nice one. I don't want someone to have the escape map to my mind. I want to have my escape map." I say and can feel tears form in my eyes.

"It doesn't matter who holds that escape map Annie. As long as they are there for you."

"I don't like not being in control of myself." I whisper.

"I know it must not feel nice but, you aren't helpless Annie and it doesn't matter if someone else has your escape map. All that matters it that you have someone with the map. Someone who can break the barriers of your mind and bring you home."

"You mean Finnick."

"I mean whoever but, yes I would say Finnick has a copy of your escape map." She smiles.

I swallow hard.

"Do you know where he got _summoned_?" I ask.

"He gets summoned lots of places to do various things." She says sadly. I wonder if all the victors know or if it is just the ones in District 4.

"You think it has to do with a client." I whisper.

"I don't think so Annie he isn't supposed to see them when the games are going on." She says.

"_Supposed to_ being the key words." I say.

Mags smiles.

"We should get back out there, we are supposed to be socializing after all."

"But-"

She grabs my hand and pulls me up she is surprisingly strong for her age.

I sigh and we go back out to where everyone else is. I expect people to stare at me but, they don't. I sit on a couch that is isolated from the others. I hope Beetee doesn't come back so he can _evaluate_ me to see if I'm worth it.

I look at the events unfold and I realize not all the victors are here and it's not just the ones who are still mentoring. Luna said this drug wears off in seventy two hours who knows how long we will sleep. I do notice Haymitch is here and both of his tributes died in the bloodbath. He is drinking -shock- with a man who has one hand. I think he is from Eleven or Ten. I think his name was Chip or Chaff something along those lines. Near them are three victors who are clearly on something. They are all staring off into space.

"Annie." I hear a sweet voice say. I imagine this person to be petite and small and when I turn my head I am correct because when I turn around I see Bleu. Bleu is from District 5 and the only reason I remember this is because she is the sole victor there. I don't know who won before her but I imagine it must be lonely. Same goes to Haymitch I wonder if that is why he is a drunk.

"Bleu." I say.

"Oh good you remembered me." She squeaks.

"How could I forget." I say.

I don't just mean that because she is the sole victor of Five but, because of her appearance. She is in her mid twenties and has pale skin and green eyes but the reason I remember her is her hair. She has hair that is shoulder length that is very feathery and is all different lengths. The cut isn't just memorable but so is the color it is a snow white. I'm sure it is fake and don't know why she does it but it's not business. At least she didn't have her teeth turned to fangs like a female victor from Two.

"That's so nice. So are you having fun?" She asks. I can't tell if she is being sarcastic or serious.

"Not really I don't like all of this." I mumble.

"Neither do I. I think the only people who do are over there." She motions to the victors from One and Two. There is a decent amount of them because they usually win.

"I know." I say.

"Next time Cashmere talks with you ignore her."

"Her brother too?" I say.

Bleu laughs slightly.

"Gloss doesn't talk much. Some people say it is because he is traumatized by the Hunger Games but, I think he is just shy."

"Well he volunteered he deserves it." I mumble

"Oh Annie you don't know?" She says surprised.

"Know what?" I ask.

"Gloss didn't volunteer."

"What?"

"He went in after Cashmere and didn't volunteer. The strange thing about all of this isn't because he didn't volunteer it's because no one else did. District One always has a volunteer." She says in a hushed voice.

"That's strange." I say.

"Most of the victors think it was rigged especially because of the recaps."

"What happened at the recaps?" I ask.

"The live feed crapped out and on the recaps it was very staticy and hard to understand, just like when victors children get put into the arena." She smiles

"That's rigged?" I say not knowing why I sound surprised.

"Yes it's to send a message. It doesn't matter who you are you are never safe." She says

"That's terrible."

"Of course it is Annie but this whole situation is."

I look over at Cashmere and Gloss and wonder if what she is saying is true that it was set up so he would be in the arena.

"Does that mean they set it up or him to win?"

"Who Gloss?" She looks at me and nods. "I'd say odds against, they really like to do comparisons between the victor and the tribute. I think if they rigged it the citizens wouldn't be given the chance."

"I wonder how Cashmere feels about this." I mumble.

"I would say guiltily because the reason this happened is because she said no to the _deal_."

It looks like the other victors do know about it. I wonder if Marci and Jason aren't safe then.

"Don't worry Finnick's brother and sister are safe because he said yes after Snow killed his parents."

"Oh." I say even though I knew this already.

"Finnick takes his role very seriously. Which is why the rumors about you and him on the Victory Tour spread like wildfire."

"What rumors?" I ask.

"You know that you were fucking."

"Oh that's not-

"I know it's not true. Finnick doesn't give it away that easily despite what people think." It sounds like she is speaking from experience.

"Did you try to buy him?" I whisper disgusted.

"No, victors can't buy other victors. If they did all the victors probably would've bought him."

"I see." I say uncomfortable because. I'm starting to get the feeling that she had sex with Finnick.

"Yes and the rumors must be true about how good he is because he has been with lots of people."

"I guess." I say and I can feel my face turning red from being uncomfortable.

"I think I'll go over there." I say and get up to leave. I don't care who Finnick has been with but, I don't need to hear about it.

"If you don't want people to talk with you I would go over to the morphilings people avoid them because they are drugged out of their mind."

"Who are you talking about?"

"The victors from Six to escape their memories they take morphling instead of alcohol like our dear Haymitch." She smiles and I head to the food table to drink some water. It tastes very bitter though.

"It's because of the drugs." Someone whispers in my ear seductively. If I didn't know any better I would say it was Finnick but I can tell from the voice it's not.

I turn around and see Blake he is a victor from Nine. I remember him from his flirtatious attitude. He acts like Finnick when he is pretending but, Blake isn't he is really like that. I'm assuming he gets many Capitol girls as well.

Blake is probably in his late twenties or early thirties he won when he was sixteen. So it's been at least ten years since he has won. He has a strong build, dirty blonde hair, and brown eyes. He also has tanned skin which I'm assuming is from working in the fields because after he won he bought a farm. I think it was for the grain but it could've just been because he could. Considering how Blake acts I'm assuming the latter.

"Oh." I say.

"Luna and Mags not tell you that?" He says and pushes my hair back.

"N-no." I stutter.

"That's alright, they probably thought Finnick would do it but he had to run away for a bit."

"Yes."

"I could keep you company until he comes back." He says.

I smile because I don't know what else to say.

"That's what I thought. You know you really are something Anne despite what they all think of you, I know you're perfect. You're looks alone silence a room." He says and runs his hand over my cheek and I can feel myself blushing. I think it is because I'm uncomfortable. I did the same with Finnick when I thought he was an ass.

He smiles.

"You feel better don't you."

"What?" I ask confused. I hope he doesn't mean because he is near me.

"After talking with Beetee you seemed upset." He smiles.

"Well I'm fine now." I say slightly angry.

"Don't worry about that. Most people get flustered while talking to him. Mostly because they don't know what he is saying."

"Oh." I say.

"So tell me Annie what makes you tick?" He asks me and leans in like he will kiss me.

I step away a little and he doesn't fight me. He knows what he is doing and I think he is getting pleasure from it.

"I-I nothing, nothing at all." I say.

"Well that must not be true. You must be special to capture the heart of the _great_ Finnick Odair."

"I-I...

I end up backing away from him so much that some of the plates scatter to the floor.

"I think I'm making you uncomfortable. There are better prospects over there." He says and eyes Enobaria. "Gotta love those teeth."

I nod.

He leans in again and whispers in my ear.

"It was a pleasure Annie." He says and puts hair behind my ear and winks. Then he walks off towards Enobaria.

I sit at one of the tables and eat something and it all has a bad after taste. I'm assuming it is from the drugs like Blake said, he has no reason to lie.

I feel a tap on my shoulder and jump I have no idea who to expect but, when I turn around I see Finnick. He sits across from me.

"You okay?" He asks.

"These victors are…" I trail off not knowing how I finish.

He smiles

"That's true." He says.

"Did they tell you about the food?" He asks me.

"Blake did." I say.

He nods and I can see him smiling. He must know Blake just didn't come up and tell me.

"And did you like that?" He teases

"There are worse things. He reminds me of the alter ego Finnick." I say.

"Well he should. He is the person I modeled it after."

"Really." I say surprised.

"Everyone needs inspiration." He smirks.

"Does he know this?"

"Yes. He feels very flattered." Finnick rolls his eyes.

"I see." I say. "So where did you go?" I ask.

"Snow wanted to see me. It had to do with the punishment of Cynthia."

"Why?"

"He said it was a personal issue so he would let me decide."

"What did you do?" I ask nervously.

"She got put on the list. Snow seemed surprised that I didn't want it to be more... brutal. However, I didn't know that when they got put on the list they got branded." Finnick says and looks sad.

I get up and go sit next to him and hold his hand and I lean against his shoulder.

"Hey Finnick."

"Hey Annie." He smiles.

"What's your story with the other victors?" I ask.

"Stories?" He asks confused.

"I was talking with Bleu and she made it sound like-

"What?"

"You had some history."

He sighs.

"No although that has to stop her from trying. Why do you care?"

"I don't, I was just curious."

"Really because I thought you sounded a tad jealous."

"Jealous I'm not jealous of Bleu."

"Okay." He says in a jokey tone and kisses my cheek.

We sit in here for the rest of the time. I can feel myself getting drowsier and drowsier.

Finnick is about to take me upstairs so I can sleep but, before I do they announce that Johanna Mason is the victor of the Seventy first Hunger Games. She was the clear winner for awhile. I remember what Bleu said about Gloss, I wonder if they rigged the games. If they do I wonder what else they rig, I wonder if they prepick the victor. If that was the case I don't think I would've won. Unless they want to show even a weakling can be victorious. Finnick did say lots of the citizens gave me sponsors maybe, that has something to do with it, Capitol approval. If that is the case then the odds are never really in your favor.


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter 41**

After the games are over we head back to the suite and will wait until Johanna is presentable. She got beaten up badly in the final fight so she probably has some recovery time.

I slept for three days and was surprised it wasn't longer because I was awake for a least two weeks. I didn't question it though. I felt rested and now all there is to do is relax.

Finnick hasn't had to go away which I am grateful for. I don't want to be away from him not in the Capitol, maybe not ever.

"Finnick?" I ask

"Yes?"

"What going to happen after Johanna is all better?"

"We go down to watch the recaps in the crowd with the rest of the citizens."

"Oh." I say and swallow hard.

"Don't worry it won't be Capitol citizens next to you it will be all the victors."

"Great maybe if I'm lucky I will be seated near Blake." I say sarcastically.

He smiles.

"Doubtful he likes siting next to Esmeralda or Talia, depending on the year."

"Which victors are those again?"

"Esmeralda is from District Eight she has ebony hair and skin. She usually wears golden hoop earrings. She is twenty five I think."

"I vaguely remember her. What about Talia?" I ask.

"She's the other victor from Nine. She has red hair, pale skin, and green eyes. She-

"Is she the one who started screaming at my Victory Tour celebration?" I ask nicely.

I remember on the Victory Tour a female victor was sitting next to me and kept picking at her cuticles until they started to bleed. A few minutes later they started to give my honor speech and she started screaming. She broke a few glasses which caused deep cuts in her hands and they started to bleed a lot. I'm sure she had glass stuck in them. She was also shouting that it was trying to kill her. Someone took her out of the room and was comforting her but, you could still hear her screaming in the other room.

I think it did happen in Nine. I know Blake and a female are the only victors from there.

Finnick nods.

"Talia has nervous breakdowns sometimes. It's usually every other year and only last for a few months. It's not always around the Hunger Games but, Blake will sit next to her when she has had one that year. Just in case anything would happen or if she asks him to sit next to her he will."

"Blake sit next to her." I scoff.

"Blake may act like a creep and come on very strong but he does care about other people Annie. After all he was the one who took her out of the room to comfort her and he is the one who goes to her house and takes care of her."

"Takes care of her?" I ask confused. I don't really know what a nervous breakdown is but, Finnick makes it sound like bad things happen. It sounds like it is temporary and lasts a short amount of time but, it is still probably terrible.

"When she has a nervous breakdown she becomes depressed and very anxious. She always thinks something is going to kill her. I think it is usually the beast that destroyed most of her arena and killed almost all of the tributes in five minutes. Blake makes sure she is eating and not terrified that someone or something is going to kill her. He also makes sure she doesn't just sit inside all day. He takes her to his farm and has her help plant and harvest things. He doesn't want her to stay in bed all day and become more depressed.

"Is that why he bought that farm for her?" I ask surprised.

Finnick scoffs.

"He did that because he could and to help the citizens of Nine so they wouldn't have to work as hard. He also wanted to get rid of some of his victor winnings. I think because he hates it like everyone else."

"He really does all of that? I mean Blake. The person you modeled alter ego Finnick after? The person who seems like he would hit anything that moved." I say trying not to sound too surprised

"Yes one and the same. He cares about lots of things, Talia being one of them. He cares about Talia… a lot. I would go as far to say he loved her but, in a platonic way." Finnick says.

"Oh."

"Most of the victors don't show everything. We all have a separate life from the one they present in the Capitol. And you figure out who the real person is eventually mostly because you become their friend." Finnick says.

I feel a little bad for judging Blake and probably the other victors, Finnick is right I don't really know them. After all I hated Finnick before I got to know him.

"Well then who is this Esmeralda then?" I ask.

"Oh she is his… friend. I think that is the best way to describe it."

"Did you have any friends?" I ask thinking of Bleu.

"Not really." He says

"But not no either." I say.

"Annie-"

"I don't care Finnick." I say truthfully and I don't care. I can't change the past, besides it's not like I knew him. I just know this Finnick and that is all that matters now."

"Really?" He asks and I can tell he doesn't believe me.

"Yes really although I am disappointed that you lied when I asked about Bleu." I say.

"I didn't want you to know."

"Well I figured it out by myself you shouldn't lie to me Finnick Odair that is more hurtful than anything especially when I find out the truth because believe me Finnick I _will_ find out the truth." I say

"I won't lie and there wasn't anyone else just her."

"You're not lying?"

"No."

"Okay because I will find out." I tease.

"I know you will." He says and kisses me.

* * *

Today is the day for the recaps because Johanna is now all patched up.

Aries, Luna, Mags, Finnick and, myself are all in the elevator heading to our seats. Aries doesn't sit with the mentors he sits with the stylists and we didn't hear the end of that. It was hard not to laugh at his rant because it was so frivolous.

I'm surprised that we don't have to wear anything ridiculous we got told we could wear whatever we wanted so I just put on some lounge clothes. I could tell Aries disapproved though but I don't care what he thinks.

We escorted to the seating area and I can hear the screams of many Capitol people. Finnick, Mags, and myself all walk to the back of the reserved seats but, Luna heads to the front and sits next to Cashmere and I can practically hear them cackling. Luna is usually nice when around me but I have no idea if that is her true self.

All the people from One and Two sit with one another plus Luna.

The people from Three and Six sit next to one another. I assume this is because everyone wants to avoid them

I can tell who is friends with whom by who they set next to. Haymitch sits next to the mentors from Eleven and Chaff and Haymitch are cracking jokes and laughing.

The people from Ten are chatting with the people from Eight. Bleu comes over and takes the seat next to Mags. Most of the seats are taken the only victors who aren't here are the ones from Nine and Seven but the one from Seven is backstage helping Johanna so that means just Blake and Talia aren't here. There are two empty seats next to me I'm assuming they will be sitting next to me.

"How long until it starts?" I ask Finnick.

"Probably thirty minutes they want us to be here early."

I look at all the Capitol citizens.

"How long have they been here?"

"Some camp out they want to get a good view of _their_ victor." Finnick says with disgust.

I lean my shoulder against him and a few minutes later I see Blake and Talia and know she was definitely the one who was screaming.

Talia is very pretty she has perfect creamy white skin and her eyes are like emeralds. Her hair seems to fall perfectly around her face. I wonder if she is part of Snow's deal.

She sits next to me and smiles.

"Hi Annie." She says. Her voice is soft but gentle. I don't remember her games but, I think she was in a similar situation as me.

I look at her hands and can tell she has been picking at her cuticles because I can see the dried blood around her middle finger.

"Hi Talia." I say.

"Yes hellooo Annie." Blake purrs.

"Stop that." Talia says and playfully pushes him.

"My apologies." He says.

Talia rolls her eyes

"Are you alright? The first time mentoring is always terrible. I didn't see you after we… lost because I don't like being in that room." she says

"I'm okay and I didn't like it either." I say.

She smiles.

"I don't think anyone does. I think the people from One and Two just fake it." She says.

"Maybe." I laugh awkwardly because I know that isn't true from Cashmere speaking with me.

"I don't know how I feel about this _Johanna_ she seems-

"Talia." Blake cuts her off.

"What?" She asks. She sounds confused.

"Your hands are bleeding." He says gently.

I look down and didn't notice she was picking her cuticles. I wonder if she didn't either and it is just something she does subconsciously when she is uncomfortable.

The middle finger that had dried blood is now bleeding like someone turned on a faucet and the others are just bleeding a little.

"Oh no." Talia whispers.

"It's okay Talia." He tells her gently.

"No." Talia says angrily and puts her hands in a fist getting blood all over her palms.

"It's okay it's just a little blood." He tells her.

"But they all saw." She whispers and it looks like she is going to cry.

I look away to pretend I didn't see. I think this has to do with the anxiety. If she is worried what people are always thinking about her it would probably upset her.

"No, no one saw Talia." Blake says gently. Although I'm pretty sure he knows I did. After all I was talking with her.

I can tell he is fiddling with something maybe a band aid.

I look around and notice the structure around me.

"What the heck is that?" I ask Finnick. I motion towards the balcony where there is a giant screen.

"That's the feed President Snow watches from." Finnick tells me.

"What he can't turn on the tv like any other citizen?" I ask annoyed.

"I think he gets to see other things."

I can hear Talia crying. Blake takes her and they leave the room. We have probably twenty minutes before anything happens. Hopefully he can calm her down in that amount of time.

I can see Mags face and I can see sorrow on it. The other victors must know then. She has a right to believe that they are all thinking she is crazy or damaged. I think about that all the time. Especially after hearing Cashmere call me crazy Cresta.

I shiver.

"You alright?" Finnick asks me.

I nod.

"Just want to get this over with." I say.

"Don't worry after this it's only a few more hours in the Capitol." Finnick says and I hold his hand and rest against his shoulder.

The interview is supposed to start in five minutes. I can see Caesar and the crew starting to fiddle with everything. Talia and Blake still aren't back I'm sure they will be told to come out soon. Although that's just when Caesar will start to talk and his opening remakes usually last ten minutes.

The lights on the stage are starting to light up and then I see Talia and Blake in the distance.

This time Blake is sitting next to me and I think Talia requested this because less people will see her. I can tell that is is uncomfortable though and her hands have been bandaged.

"Change of places so I can be closer to the beautiful Annie Cresta." Blake says and I can tell he is teasing me.

I roll my eyes.

"Find another girl to be with Blake Annie is mine." Finnick jokes and grabs my hand possessively.

"I never steal." He flashes a smile "But Annie when this thing is over you can see me." He says and can barely keep himself from laughing.

"Blake." I hear Talia say and his facial expression changes to something more serious and he turns to her.

I notice he is holding her hand and I don't think it is just to comfort her. I think it is so she won't be able to pick her cuticles.

She is whispering something to him and he is nodding. Finnick was right Blake does care about her. I don't know how much but he wouldn't be with some Capitol idiot if she needed him.

They start to count down and then the interview starts.

"Hello and welcome to the recaps of the 71st Hunger Games!" Caesar exclaims this year his hair is a neon green. It reminds me of snot.

He makes corny jokes and then he calls out for Johanna Mason the victor.

Johanna comes out and she isn't smiling her face has a look of disgust and annoyance. She isn't smiling she has a sneer on her face. Blake jerks next to me and I can see Talia is trying to get him to let go of her probably so she can pick her cuticles. I go back to looking at the Johanna because I Talia doesn't want the attention but, it's making it hard when she keeps squirming around.

Johanna sits down and doesn't bother to shake Caesar's hand she hates it and she is very disgusted and I don't blame her.

"Well, well Miss Mason I think we can all say we are very impressed that you are sitting up here with me. Especially after your poor training score."

"It was poor to me too Caesar I was aiming for a one but, I did still make history." She smiles.

"Yes you did and who knew you were so vicious like some of our most prized victors." Caesar says and motions towards the victors.

"Well they were my _inspiration_." She says with disgust.

"I'm sure they were, was this a plan from your mentors?"

"No if I told too many people I was afraid it wouldn't seem _authentic_." She smiles.

"Well I was very impressed and I think we all were as well." Caesar says and the whole crowd cheers.

"Now why don't we relive it all shall we?" He says and they start to project the recaps. I don't look and just make circles on Finnick's hand.

After probably two hours the recaps are over and we can leave. As soon as we get the okay to leave Talia gets up and runs out of the room.

"Talia wait." Blake says and chases after her.

Talia reminds me of myself broken and afraid. Finnick says she isn't always like this though then again I'm not always like that I just have my moments.

"We should go back upstairs." Finnick says.

We get up and head to the elevator. The victors from Six are in the elevator with us and they are totally checked out. I feel bad for them, then again I feel bad for almost all of us.

We get upstairs and I start to walk towards the kitchen.

"Now wasn't that marvelous!" Aries shouts.

"Yes it was something." Luna says but she doesn't sound excited. She sounds bored.

"You need to leave the suite in one hour because that is when your train will be ready. That means we have an hour to talk about those games. Don't you just love her! That final where she gauged out that tributes eyes. You know some people think that wasn't necessary-

I walk away I don't want to hear this and I'm starting to feel light headed.

Finnick walks over towards me.

"Don't listen to him Annie. It wasn't that bad" He tells me.

"I...

"Annie?" He asks concerned.

"I uh..." I start to feel scared for some reason. I put my hands on my forehead because I can feel them throbbing.

I'm starting to feel more scared until it turns into terror and eventually that is all I feel. My vision starts to go blurry and I start to sweat. I feel like crying but am so afraid I'm not able to.

"Annie, Annie." I can hear Finnick say. He starts to hug me but it makes the terror worse.

"Don't touch me!" I shout even though I meant to say it nice and calmly.

Finnick let's go of me very quickly.

I start to have a sharp pain in my chest and then my heart starts to beat so fast that I think I might be having a hear attack. I think I might be dying

"I going to die!" I shout.

"Annie you're fine, nothing is going to hurt you here." Finnick says gently.

"I... I..." I trail off because I start hyperventilating.

"Annie, Anne you're okay." Finnick says he sounds worried which makes me feel worse. I feel like I'm going to pass out. I feel like I'm drowning. I sit down and grip the fabric.

Finnick sits next to me and is careful not to touch me.

"Annie shhh it's okay. Try and listen to my breathing and match that."

Finnick breathes in and out. I try and breathe with him but it isn't working I'm still hyperventilating.

I put my hands on my face and grasp my hair.

"I'm going to die!" I shout again.

"Annie no you're not. You're safe here, you're safe with me."

"Please she is so over dramatic." I hear someone else say it sounds like Aries.

This makes it worse and I start to hyperventilate faster because he probably thinks I'm crazy.

I don't think I'm getting enough oxygen to my brain and I start to feel afraid of that.

_I'm going to die._ I think to myself

Finnick keeps talking to me but it doesn't matter. He can't help me, nothing or no one can. I'm trapped, I can't leave this state of terror. I can't leave this world and no matter what Finnick does that will always be true.

I start crying and I don't even realize it until I can hear Aries say 'She is crying when nothing is hurting her. What she is so terrified of?'

I start rocking back and forth and after what seems like an eternity my heart beat slows, my breathing is back to normal, and I don't feel as terrified. I'm still scared a little but, I know now it's not rational for me to be that terrified.

I am drenched in sweat and tears and I can see Finnick looking at me. He doesn't look at me like I'm crazy but he is looking at me worried. He doesn't say anything I think he wants me to talk first.

I want to say something but the words don't come all I can mange to say is.

"Water."

Finnick practically runs to the kitchen to get me water. I take it and notice my hands are still shaking because I'm getting drops of water on myself and the sofa.

I bring the glass to my lips and gulp it down I then set the glass on the table.

"Do you want more?" Finnick asks in a soothing tone.

"No. I'm fine." I say.

He smiles and lifts his arm but, then puts it down. I think he wanted to stroke my hair or rub my shoulder but he doesn't because I shouted at him not to touch me.

I feel like we have been here a whole day. The train was suppose to leave in an hour.

"We didn't miss the train did we?" I ask. My voice sounds raspy probably from me hyperventilating.

"Annie you've only been here for fifteen minutes."

"What?" I say with disbelief because that felt like a whole day possibly longer.

"Yes, see." He says and motions towards the clock. He is right its been only fifteen minutes.

"Oh I see."

"Are you alright now Annie?" He asks me gently but I can hear the worry and concern in his voice.

"I think so." I say.

"What happened?" He asks me.

"I don't know, I just felt very afraid. I kept thinking I was going to die it felt like I was dying. I thought I has having a heart attack. I was trapped in my own world but this time it was a world of panic and it wasn't going away. Nothing would help take the terror away." I pause "It was so scary Finnick." I say and hug him forcefully. He gasps by how fast I hug him but after a few seconds he places his arms around me.

He kisses my forehead.

"It's okay Annie, it's over now. You got through it and you're fine." He says and strokes my hair. "You're safe here, you're safe with me. You always will be." He says and I hold onto him tighter.

"I know." I whisper into his chest. "Because you have my escape map."

I do know I will always be safe with Finnick. I'm usually alright when I'm not with him but coming back here, coming to the Capitol made everything worse. I think it broke my brain.

"What do you mean?" He asks confused.

"It doesn't matter. You're just like a ray of sunshine on a stormy day."

"Okay Annie." She smiles and kisses my forehead.

"Love you." I whisper and he kisses me softly and everything feels okay again.


	42. Chapter 42

**A/N: Hello everyone! Sorry I haven't posted in a bit but, I am in the process of moving which is stressful and annoying. I have a new chapter now! Yay! lol. Thank you for reading and reviewing!**

**Chapter 42**

I'm sitting on my porch looking at the stars. It's nice to see after being in the Capitol because you can't see the stars there. It's because of the city lights. In Victors Village you can see all the stars it is so beautiful. It looks like someone sprinkled sugar in the sky. I love it.

"Annie. Annie." My Mother says bringing me back to reality.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"Nothing." She says and sits next to me. "You've just been staring at the sky for hours."

"I was looking at the stars and thinking how insignificant all of us are."

"What do you mean Annie?"

"Look at all of it." She looks up at the sky.

"It is pretty." She says.

"But when we die what mark will we have left on the world? There is all of this and we are just small blips just living just being controlled really." I say.

"It's okay sweets." She kisses me. "We're okay and it doesn't matter as long as we have each other right now. It doesn't matter what are mark is all that matters is the people in our lives who we touch." She kisses my cheek.

"I guess."

She looks at me carefully.

"Are you alright Annie?"

"I'm fine." I lie.

"You can't lie to me Annie. What is it?"

"It's just... ever since going to the Capitol something is different." I say.

She looks at me and puts a strand of hair behind my ear.

"I know sweetie but it's okay it's going to be okay." She says and kisses my forehead.

"No it won't. I can't stop it. I can't stop the terror from coming in. I want it to go away. I want the flashbacks to go away. I want it to stop. I will make it stop it."

She wraps her arms around me and rests her chin on my head.

"It's okay Annie but, what do you mean you will stop it? How would you plan on doing that?"

"I don't know." I mutter.

She looks at me almost studying me.

"Annie-

"I won't do it." I say before she can ask.

"How do you know?"

"I can't leave the people I love behind. Killing myself would be selfish." I mutter and lean into her and start crying.

She holds me and smooths my hair for a few minutes until I stop crying.

"When Finnick's not here you don't seem to be... the same." She says very carefully

"I know." I say annoyed.

"I'm just making an observation." She smooths my hair and kisses my forehead." Sometimes I do wonder what you would be like if there was no Finnick."

"What does that mean?" I ask.

"I think you would be different, maybe worse. I would worry more when you were at the Capitol. The reason I don't as much is because I know Finnick will take care of you."

"Are you saying I can't function without him." I say angrily.

"I wouldn't have phrased it like that but-

I sigh.

"Do not take it the wrong way Annie."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"You've always been more independent. Which is something I admire but, it's nice seeing you being dependent on someone besides me."

"What about Lana?"

"It's not the same Annie."

I look at her slightly angry.

"Annie do not give me that look."

"What look. I don't have a look on my face."

"Annie-

"I'm going to bed."

"Annie I didn't want to make you angry."

"Well you did."

"It isn't a weakness to need someone else Annie."

"Yes it is." I say.

The past few days I couldn't stop thinking about what my Mom said about me being dependent on Finnick. I can't need him for everything but, ever since she pointed it out I realized how much I do need him and it is more than it should be.

I talked about this with Lana and she hesitantly agreed with me. She doesn't like getting involved in others people relationship business.

* * *

Finnick is coming back from the Capitol today and I have something I need to tell him.

I'm waiting outside my house. I generally see Finnick for a few hours and then he spends the rest of the day with Marci and Jason. He wants to be alone with them after being apart for so long. It was two weeks this time which is the longest it has ever been and I'm pretty sure it has to do with him taking on more clients to protect me.

I see the train roll in off in the distance and about ten minutes later I see Finnick walking towards me.

"Hello." He says.

"Hi." I say not meeting his eyes I don't want to tell him this but I feel like I need to.

"Annie what's wrong?"

"Nothing I just need to talk to you." I say and motion to the swinging chair on my porch. He sits next to me and reaches for my hand but I pull it away.

"What's wrong Annie?" He asks gently and places his hand on my cheek. I take his hand and pull it away. He looks at me strangely.

"Did something happen when I was gone?"

"No."

"Did I do something wrong?"

"No… I just...

"What is it Annie? You can tell me even if you think I don't want to hear it."

I breathe in them back out.

"I spend too much time with you!" I end up shouting.

Finnick looks at me strangely.

"I didn't realize that was a bad thing." He says confused.

"Well it is. For the last few days I have been keeping tabs when I would _need_ you or be with you."

"And?"

"It was too much. I need to spend less time with you. I need more Annie time."

He looks at me strangely again.

"Well when we were in the Capitol you seemed to need me."

"That's because I hate that place and I need you as much as possible but here when it is 'normal' I shouldn't need you so much." I say.

"So what?" He says.

"What do you mean?"

"So what if you need me that much. What does it matter-

"It matters to me Finnick."

"Okay. I guess you only need me when it's at your convenience " He says and gets up.

"That's not true and you don't have to leave right now." I say.

"Well I want to, give you you're Annie time." He says annoyed. I made him mad.

"You're taking this the wrong way Finnick. I still love you and that's why I need to see less of you."

He looks at me strangely.

"I think that statement is contradictory." He says.

I sigh.

"No it isn't."

"Yes it is Annie. You can't tell someone you love them and ask to spend less time with them. You didn't see or hear from me for two weeks and I come back and you say you want to see me less. How does that make sense? I just didn't see you for two weeks do, you need more alone time than that?"

"Finnick-

"And did you ever consider that I spend so much time with you is because I need you."

"I- I

"You're being selfish Annie."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you are you didn't even think about how I felt about this."

"Finnick-

"I want some Finnick time." He says and walks back to his house.

I slump back down on the porch swing. I don't think I was being selfish but I didn't even think about him. I didn't think he spent so much time with me because he needed me. I start to feel guilty and confused. Did I really want to spend less time with him or was it just my need to be independent. Was I subconsciously doing this.

I sigh.

I feel like I just crushed Finnick's heart a little. I could tell by the look on his face he was hurt especially when he said he hadn't had any contact with me for two weeks. Me asking not to see him was probably like a stab in the gut. I'm starting to feel worse because he was gone for so long because of me.

I think he was right. I was being selfish. All I thought about was me.

I put my hands over my face.

"What did I just do to you Finnick Odair?" I mutter to myself.


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter 43**

I walk to Lana's house frustrated at Finnick or myself the jury is still out on that one. I need to talk to someone about this and Lana is the person right now mostly because my Mom is working at our family shop. I could interrupt her but, that also means I have to go into town by myself. I shiver at the thought. Something else I can't do without Finnick by my side.

I sigh in frustration and walk right into Lana's house not bothering to knock. I know she is here by herself because her parents are at work.

"Who's there?" She asks while coming from her bedroom.

"It's Annie." I say even though she can see me.

She rolls her eyes.

"Why do you look so nice?"

"Jason was gonna come over and-

"Stop." I say because I have a feeling I know what she is going to say.

"No, to what you are thinking." She smiles.

"Oh... then why do you look like that?" I ask.

"Like what? It's shorts and a t-shirt."

"Maybe it's because the hair is down." I smile.

Her sandy blonde hair is down and wavy. Lana rarely wears her hair down unless she is doing or going somewhere important sans Hunger Games related things.

"Maybe." She says.

"Where are you going?"

"Nowhere really." She smiles. "So what do I own the honor of this visit?"

"I wanted to complain to you."

"Does this have to do with Finnick?"

"Why would you say that?"

"Because a few days before he came back you had that notebook keeping tabs on when you needed him or something."

"I did and I realized I needed him too much."

"You have a very strange thought process Annie."

"No I don't, when I was walking here I was reminded I can't even come into town without him."

"False you go into town with me all the time. You just need someone with you."

Ii sigh "It's different with Finnick."

"Well maybe you should talk to him about this."

"I did."

"What did he say?"

"He got angry and walked back to his house."

"What did you say?"

"I told him I spend too much time with him and that I wanted to see less of him and then-

"Dammit Annie."

"What?"

"You probably crushed that poor boys heart telling him that after he was in the Capitol doing terrible things. For the majority of the time I bet he was thinking I can't wait to get home so I can see Annie. Then he gets home and you tell him you need to see him less. Of course he's mad at you."

"Hey you're supposed to be on my side here."

"There are no sides Annie I'm just saying that is probably why he is mad at you."

"But-

"Take a minute and try to see the roles reversed. If you went to the Capitol and Finnick told you he wanted to cool things off as soon as you got back, how would you feel?" She looks at me with her knowing look and I do think about it.

If I came back and the first thing that happens would be hearing the person I love most say they want to see less of me, myy heart would be crushed a little too. But, I can't be with him too much. I don't know why but something in mind is saying stay away from him.

"You see what I mean?" She asks.

"Yes but-

"There should be no buts."

"Well there is. I understand why he is mad and probably feeling what he is feeling but, I still feel like I spend too much time with him."

"And why do you think that?"

"I don't know it's just this instinctive feeling."

"Well maybe you should tell your instincts that they have no idea what they are talking about."

"Its not that simple." I mutter.

"Maybe for you because you like being alone."

"That's not true."

"Annie yes you do and there's nothing wrong with that. You prefer to have friends that you are really close with opposed to a whole pool of friends you can choose from and you feel perfectly content if you would just stay home all day and read or something."

"What's wrong with that?"

"As I said nothing however it doesn't work that way with Finnick."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm pretty sure he needs you. I think that's why he spend so much time with you after you won. You needed someone but I think he liked having someone to talk to about all this messed up shit that was his age. And I don't know if you noticed this but Finnick doesn't have many friends. And by many I mean zero besides you and his brother and sister. Don't you find that curious?" She says.

"I never really thought about it like that. I thought he was jus feeling sorry for me or something." I mutter.

"I'm pretty sure the reason he didn't have any fiends was because he was paranoid someone would just hurt them."

"He is still is though." I mutter.

"Well, maybe he thinks being with you is worth the risk."

"Maybe." I mutter knowing she is probably right.

"Don't you see Annie, it was never just about you. It was about him too. It's always been Annie and Finnick. You're like that animal that can live without the other."

"That's a bad thing though Lana."

"No its not." She says

"Youre giving me relationship advice Miss one month." I smirk

"Hey I'm trying, at least I'm not just saying stop seeing him because that is what I would've said before."

"I don't know how to tell him I'm sorry with still feeling what I am."

"Are you sorry?" She asks.

"I'm sorry I upset him and that I probably should've told him in a different way but not about what I said because that is what I want and am feeling."

"I'm going to give you some advise it's not a weakness to need someone else to be there for you."

"You sound like my mother." I mutter.

"Well if two people say it, then it must be true right?" She smirks.

"I guess." I sigh.

She looks at the clock.

"Jason's going to be here soon you should go a talk with Finnick."

"Maybe I can ask Jason-

She gives me a look that says you're pathetic.

"Fine I'll go and talk to Finnick."

"Good I'll be waiting for the update."

"I'm sure you will." I say and walk out of her house.

I see Jason on the way out of Lana's house and he turns around awkwardly in the other direction.

"Jason!" I shout. "Jason!" I shout again.

He turns around.

"Annie, was that you?" He says awkwardly.

"Yes it was me now tell me why were you trying to avoid me?"

"Well, Finnick said that-

"What did he say?"

"That you know it was a time out or something he's not seeing you at the moment."

"He said what."

"He said uh... that you guys erm wanted some time apart or something."

"What?" I say again.

"Oh there must have been some confusion on what happened. I never know what to do in these awkward situations." He says and rubs the back of his neck.

He starts to walk off but I grab his arm..

"You're going to go back to your brother and tell him-

"I had plans with Lana and already which you knew about."

"But-

"I'm not your and Finnick's go between. He wanted me to tell you something but, I said no."

He starts to walk off.

"Hey, Hey not so fast Jason."

"What?" He says and it looks like he is trying not to laugh.

"What did he want you to tell me."

"Does it really matter?"

"It matters to me."

"It was about some locket or something."

My hand goes to my neck but, it isn't there.

"What about it?"

"I don't remember."

"Was he asking for it back?"

"I don't know maybe."

"Excuse me." I say and make my way back to Victors Village.

"It could've been something else." He shouts as I walk away.

I head to Finnick's house and bang on the door.

Finnick opens the door.

"Where's the fire Cresta?" He smiles. I roll my eyes.

If I didn't know any better I would say he isn't mad anymore but I can tell he is and I am too. I can almost hear the bell and the announcer say its time for round two.


	44. Chapter 44

** Chapter 44**

"I heard you wanted the locket you gave me back. I would give it back but, I don't have it on me."

"What are you talking about Annie?" He asks.

"You told Jason that-

"I was going to give it back to you Annie." He smiles. "You gave it to me to fix because the chain broke in the Capitol remember?"

I do remember. After I locked myself in the closet thinking I was still in the arena, I banged my head against the wall and it broke the clasp. That was how I knew I was in reality because the note inside that said _turn around_ from that scavenger hunt.

He looks at me with that smug look he has. I know he is right.

"I was going to tell him you could come by and get it." He smirks.

"Well he also said that we were on time out or something like that."

"Well, you did say you wanted to see less of me." He says.

"That's not what I meant Finnick."

"I know." He says.

"You're still mad."

"Maybe a little." He says. He is smiling but, I can tell he means it.

"I'm getting the feeling I'm sorry isn't going to cut it."

"Not really." He says.

"Finnick you don't understand-

"You're right I don't." He says.

"It's just... it's hard to explain."

"Well, try." He says.

"I don't know if I can."

Finnick rocks back on his heels.

"Can you try please." He looks at me and after a few minutes he cocks his head to the side.

"Annie?" He says.

"What? You're expecting me to come up with an answer on the fly. I don't have one Finnick. I don't know why I feel this way. I all I know is I do."

Finnick rolls his eyes and walks back to his house and I follow.

"You think you can leave the room and that will change the topic?" I ask him.

"Of course not I don't want to have it out with you outside everyone can see it then."

"Oh."

"I don't understand Annie when you were in the Capitol crying and having panic attacks-

"I'm sorry about that Finnick truly I am." I say annoyed.

"That's not what I'm I talking about, you kept saying you needed me and you never wanted me to leave. Was that a lie or did you only say that because you needed me at that moment in time?"

"That's not it Finnick."

"Then why does it feel like it is? Why do I feel like you're using me?"

I sigh

"Finnick please don't be so over dramatic."

"Over dramatic." He says and laughs from disbelief.

"Yes over dramatic." I glare at him. "I say one thing and then you freak out and think I'm using you like people in the Capitol and-

"Ugh my god Annie that is not what I meant."

"It sure sounded like it."

"Well it's not."

"Well me saying I need less time with you doesn't mean I don't love you any less."

"I never said that, is that what you were thinking?"

"No."

"Then why would you say it?"

"Because I thought that is what you were saying from my statement the other day."

"Well it's not okay. I just don't understand why you need more _Annie time,_ as you put it, when you haven't seen me for two weeks."

"I didn't mean it needed to happen right away, I just wanted to tell you what I was feeling and thinking which I thought I was allowed to do."

"You do but-

"And I don't think you have any room to judge in this scenario."

"What the hell does that mean?" He says angrily.

"You freezed me out right before the Victory Tour and afterwards you kept your distance and you kept trying to-

"That's different Annie." He says angry and defensively.

"No it's not this-

"Yes it is Annie. I was trying to protect you and you are doing this because you want to and-

"Protect me." I scoff. "From what? Your paranoid state of thinking that everyone you come close to is going to die."

"Yes. I'm sorry I didn't want you to die."

I sigh.

"Snow wasn't going to kill me."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I'm a victor he can't kill me."

He looks at me strangely.

"Is that what you really think?"

"Why would I think something else?"

"I don't know I told you about the deal and the -

"You're not seriously suggesting that I thought I wouldn't die because of that deal. That I was one of the people you were protecting."

"That's what it sounds like."

"You are crazy."

"I'm crazy? _I'm _crazy that is a rich statement." He says in an unbelievable tone.

"Why?" I ask.

He scoffs.

"Really you to ask? You're in no position to judge if someone is crazy."

I look at me strangely.

"You think I'm crazy don't you." I say softly because I can't believe what he is insinuating.

"Annie-." He says and his face has realization of what he just said.

I can feel my eyes filling up with tears.

"Don't you!" I shout this time.

"No Annie I don't."

I scoff and turn around to leave but he grabs my wrist so I won't.

"What?" I say angrily.

"I didn't mean it like that."

"That was a pretty clean cut statement Finnick you think I'm crazy."

"No I don't it was just the heat of the moment. I'm sorry."

"Keep your apology I don't want it."

"Annie please don't leave."

"Why you're just going to hit below the belt again." I say and try to get him to let go of me.

"Annie."

"Let me go Finnick! I always thought you thought I was crazy! I can't believe you made me think otherwise." I say. The tears are starting to reach the overflowing point.

"Annie-

"Let me go I want to go home."

"Annie please don't go."

"Let me go!" I shout.

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry isn't going to cut it." I say and I can feel the hot tears dripping down my cheeks. "You made me cry sorry isn't going to cut it Finnick just let me go home."

Finnick lets go of my arm. I can see the pain on his face but I don't care. It's his fault, he made me cry.

"I'll see you later." He says.

"Whatever." I say and slam his front door and walk to my house. I slump against the my front door until I'm sitting on the floor. I push my knees to my chest and start sobbing. I don't know if it's because Finnick called me crazy or because I was fighting with him. I don't want to fight with Finnick. I don't want to fight with anyone at all.

**A/N: Two chapters in one day erm mah gawd lol I just really like writing this story arc but, poor Annie and Finnick ;(**


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter 45**

I'm upstairs in my room lying on my side and I can feel the tears rolling down my face and get all over my pillow. I stopped sobbing but, I can't stop the tears from coming out of my eyes. It's as if someone turned on a faucet and I can't turn it off.

I hear a knock on my front door. I hope it isn't Finnick I don't want to talk or see him yet. I peer out my bedroom window and can see it is him. He knows I'm in here and he probably won't leave until I open the door.

I sigh and head downstairs and open the door. I don't bother wiping the tears from my face.

I see Finnick's face and he looks guilty when he sees me. He knows why I'm crying and it's because of him.

"Annie I'm sorry."

"Finnick I don't want to talk to you yet please leave. I will come to you when I do."

He puts his hand on the door knowing I was about to close it.

"Annie please don't shut me out."

"I'm not. I just don't want to talk to you now. I want to be alone can you accept that?"

"I'm sorry I can't take back what I said." He moves his hand towards my face and wipes off some of the tears and I feel alright. I shake my head and back away a little. My body is telling me to let Finnick in and hug him so he can make me feel better but my head is saying that he hurt me and I should be alone for a few more hours.

"Annie I'm so so sorry. I didn't mean it was just I was frustrated-

"You know people say you only tell the real truth when you're either drunk or angry. You were angry Finnick."

"Well I don't know who these people are but that wasn't the case."

"Then why did you say it?"

"I was angry."

"No kidding but, when you said that you hurt me.

"Annie-

"You don't know what it's like Finnick I always think you think I'm … crazy. Everyone calls me that Finnick."

"No they don't."

"The majority of people do." I mumble.

"Well I'm not one of them. Your are many things Annie Cresta but, crazy is not one of them."

"Than what am I then? What am I to you?"

"Smart, kind, caring for others and never expect anything in return, selfless, stunning." He pauses "Breathtakingly beautiful." He smiles and places a strand of hair behind my ear and I smile.

He leans in to kiss me but I back away.

"I love you Finnick."

"Why do I get the feeling a but is approaching."

"Because I cried for hours after you said that. I'm still crying. It just can't be forgiven by a few nice compliments and a kiss."

"Annie I was just upset about the situation because I just can't wrap my head around what you said."

"I don't care there are some things you're not suppose to say and that was one of them."

"Then use one on me."

"What?"

"Say one of the things that you aren't supposed to say to me. Then we will be even."

"No we won't Finnick. It doesn't work like that."

"Well-

"Besides I wouldn't be able to say it."

He sighs.

"I can't take those words back Annie. You need to accept that and believe me when I say I don't think you're crazy."

"I- I…

"Annie." He says and before I can think of something to say he hugs me. I close my eyes and lean against his chest.

He kisses my forehead.

"Please don't tell me to leave." He says

I want to object but the words get stuck in my throat.

"I just got caught up in the moment and couldn't understand your thought process Annie."

And there it is. The words stuck in my throat seem to come out as easy as vomit. I let go of him.

"I'm sorry." I say and let go step away from him. "But that's the problem Finnick, you keep looking for an answer but I don't have one."

"I don't think that's true."

"You think I'm lying?"

"No." Finnick breathes in and out "I don't want to fight with you Annie, I'm just trying to understand."

"Well how can I give you the answer when I don't know it myself, that is what is upsetting me."

He looks at me.

"I just-

"What is it just?" I ask.

"I don't understand."

"I know but-

"I wasn't finished. I don't understand because I would never ask to spend less time with you."

"Well I'm not like you then."

"Are you afraid that you're going to lose yourself or something?"

"No I'm just... like I said I don't know."

"You have no idea." He says annoyed

"No if I did I would tell you, you know that."

He breathes out.

"I guess."

"Finnick."

"Let's put this argument on pause." Finnick says.

"What? This isn't really argument."

"Well whatever this is it seems like a good place to collect our thoughts."

"You mean for me to try and give you an answer."

"Maybe."

"Finnick please don't leave until this is figured out."

"I told Marci I see her soon and I can't be late for that."

"Fine I guess."

"I'll see you later Annie." He says and my kisses my forehead. I watch him leave.

I grab a pillow and place it over my face and fall back on the sofa. I sit here for who knows how long.

I sigh and hear the front door open.

"Annie are you here?" I hear my mother ask.

"Living room." I say.

She walks in and sees me lying on the couch with my left leg and arm leaning off the side.

"Something wrong sweets?"

"Nothing I'm fine."

"Clearly." She smiles and looks at the clock. "No, Finnick today?"

"No I don't need him." I mutter. She sits next to me and I sit up.

"Are you still fighting with him?"

"I tell him one thing and he blows it way out of proportion goes and calls me crazy."

"I don't think he called you crazy."

"He did but, he was angry."

"Well he didn't mean it then." She smooths my hair.

"Then why would he have said it."

"People say all kinds of things when they are upset."

"Usually those things are true."

"No they aren't."

"I guess."

She hugs me and I lean into her and she rubs my back

"Why doesn't he understand." I say.

My mother smiles.

"Do you understand him?"

"Yes."

"Then what does he say?"

"He thinks I shouldn't want to spent less time with him because I need him so why does he need that and he keeps asking for why I feel this way but I don't know and he doesn't seem to understand that-

"Annie woah slow down for a minute."

I sigh.

"I can't stand him sometimes Mom. He can freeze me out but the minute I want less time he things I'm crazy and I'm not crazy he's crazy. He's crazy. Why doesn't he see it my way. Why does he make me feel so angry but at the same time strangely happy and safe?"

"It's because you love him."

"Okay." I mutter. "If I loved him I don't think I would be fighting so much with him."

"Annie." She smiles.

"What?"

"Love isn't all rainbows and butterflies."

"It's supposed to be that's what all the stories from childhood taught me."

"Those are just make believe stories. It's no less true than having a magical fairy godmother."

"So what love? Is it just a stupid emotion that idiots feel."

"No it's about being your true self around someone else."

"I feel that but I also feel like ripping out all my hair right now."

"There is no such thing as a fairy tale romance Annie. There is no perfect romance with no fights or disagreements and if there is then it isn't very real. When you fight you're generally fighting for that person. When the fighting stops then you should worry because it might mean there's nothing you think is worth fighting for."

I don't know how to respond I feel like my whole childhood was a lie. I guess she is right there is no magical prince that is going to sweep me off my feet. No fairy god mother going to get rid of the monsters and make my life perfect picture. No nirvana that has no death and despair. No magic armor or words that can automatically save me. None of it is true and it never will be.

I do know that I will never stop fighting with that idiot because Finnick Odair is wroth fighting for.


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter 46**

I'm sitting on the couch. It's been two days and I haven't seen Finnick and he isn't at his house. I think he is with his Uncle still which is probably not a good thing. I would seek him out but, I don't know where his Uncle lives.

I leave the house to go for a walk. I sit at the dock near Victors Village hoping I will see Finnick come back.

I lie down on the down on the dock and let the sun shine on me.

After awhile someone sits next to me. I open my eyes and see Finnick.

"Where have you been Finnick?" I say and sit up.

"Giving you Annie time." He says

"Are you trying to fight with me?" I ask him.

"Of course not."

I sigh.

"We keep having the same fight." I say.

"I really don't want to fight with you Annie. I just wanted to give you this." He says and pulls out the locket.

"Thank you." I say taking it in my hand.

"Your welcome. I have to be going but, make sure to open it I think I could've damaged the hinge."

I nod not really caring. He kisses my cheek

"Bye Annie."

"Bye Finnick. I say and he walks off.

"That's all I get after two days. My locket back and a kiss on the cheek." I mutter to myself and head back to my house. I sit around the house and help my mom make dinner and then I head upstairs to go to sleep.

My head hits the pillow but, I can't fall asleep. I toss and turn but it doesn't come. I pick the locket up from the bedside table and run it threw my fingers. I do this to keep my mind at ease so I won't have any delusions. I usually have delusions or panic attacks when I can't fall asleep. I look at the locket and notice it is shinier than before maybe, it is because the chain is new. I run my hand over the oval shape and admire the design it looks like the waves at low tide. It is simple but, that is why I like it but, something feels different about it some how.

I sigh when I would hold onto the locket I would always feel safe because it would remind me of Finnick. I feel safe but, something else as well. It just feels... different. I think it is because I've been fighting with him maybe that's why I can't sleep either.

I open the locket but, before I can close it something falls on my chest. I'm assuming it's the _turn around_ piece of paper but, it's not. This one is new. Then I remember Finnick wanted me to open it.

"Alright Finnick Odair what trick are you trying to pull this time." I say and turn on the bedside lamp and I unfold the paper which is a full piece of paper. It is folded probably a dozen times

_Annie, I figured I wouldn't be able to find the right words to say to your face so I wrote it down to make it easier. I want to say sorry first for everything. I should have just let you spend your few hours away from me without trying to question it or find a reason. I shouldn't have keep perusing it especially since I was hurting you. I know you want to spend time away from me but, I can't stay away from you. However, I still want to fulfill your wish so I will admire you from afar like a stalker. I might even hide in a bush but it doesn't matter as long as I am close with you._

I smile. "Where are you going with this Finnick."

_I know you think that you love me too much and that you spend too much time with me but, I don't care and I'm happy to be that person for you. If that is your only crutch in life I don't think it is a bad thing. Annie you are the first thing I think of when I wake up and the last thing I think of when I go to sleep. I need you even though I suspect you don't believe that. Annie, when I go to the Capitol I know I will be alright because I get to see your beautiful face again._

_You make me forget about bad things that have happened and I know I love you more than I should but, I don't care. I called you crazy which I am truly sorry for. I can't take that back. Besides I think the only crazy person here is me especially when I'm with you because when I'm with you I forget how to breathe or think or do anything really. All I know is that I'm with you and I don't want to leave. All I know is that I need you._

"Holy shit." I say and am surprised because I never talk like this.

I get out of bed and look at the clock it's three thirty in the morning but, I don't care. I go downstairs and out the door not bothering to change or put on shoes. I go to Finnick's house and try to open the door but, it's locked. Of course it would be it's three in the morning.

I sigh. Then I remember where his hiding key is. I find it and unlock the door and head upstairs to his bedroom.

It takes me less than a minute to realize that Marci and Jason are staying here this week. I try to be as quite as possible so I don't wake them. I open Finnick's door slowly and sit on one of the chairs and watch him sleep for a few minutes. He looks so peaceful which is nice to see because the past couple of days have been filled with mostly anger and guilt.

I make a slight move and then Finnick bolts awake quickly and grabs something from the nightstand.

"Finnick relax it's just me.

"Annie what are you doing here?"

"I just-

"Hang on how did you get into my house the door was locked."

"I found your hiding key."

"Breaking into my house Annie tsk tsk." He smiles and puts what he grabbed on the nightstand back. I get a better look at what it and notice it is a knife.

"You're not going to stab me are you?"

"What?" He asks and soon understands. "No that's just in case… the nightmares." He says. I nod and walk closer to him and sit on the bed.

"Okay Annie Cresta what are you doing in my house at." His eyes flicker to the clock. "3:30 in the morning?"

"I-

"This a booty call?" He teases.

"No." I roll my eyes "But you already knew that."

He smiles but then has a more composed look on his face.

"Did something happen? Are you okay?"

"Yes no. I got your note."

"Took you long enough to open it Miss. Cresta." He smiles.

"I didn't think there would be something like this inside."

He nods.

"It was subtle. So you come to break my heart?" He says.

"Of course not. I came for forgiveness."

"Annie I-

"Let me finish."

He nods.

"I think I know the answer now." I whisper.

"What?"

"To your question."

"I said you didn't need to give me one. Didn't you read the note?"

"I did you want to stalk me and hide in bushes to be near me and that is borderline obsession or addiction but, we can analyze that later."

He smiles

"It's just I didn't know before but reading that note I realized it."

"What is it then?"

"I can't live without you." I pause "And I'm afraid that if I'm with you too much I won't know how to be by myself anymore."

He hugs me and strokes my hair and kisses my forehead.

"You're never going to have that problem Annie because you're strong."

"But-

"If your only complaint in life at the moment is loving someone too much I think you'll be okay."

"But what if you die or something? What if you go to the Capitol and don't come back? What if-

"Annie there could be a million what ifs with a million different answers but for right now don't worry about any of it." He places hair behind my ear.  
"Just worry about the present, just worry about being here with me."

I hug him and it is silent for a few minutes.

"Okay." I say.

He leans in to kiss me and this time I let him.

"I love you." I whisper.

"I love you too."

I hug him and don't feel like leaving. I lay down and Finnick keeps his arms around me and I fall asleep quickly.

* * *

I wake up and am confused by my surroundings. I'm not in my room. I look to my left and see Finnick and then I remember I came over here last night to apologize and didn't leave because I didn't want to.

I roll over and look at Finnick he looks so peaceful. I have seen him sleep before but, he has never looked this peaceful.

He looks years younger and innocent, like nothing has ever hurt him. I can still make out the worry lines on his face but he still looks at peace.

Wherever his mind has taken him isn't a bad place. It's somewhere that will not hurt him maybe it is because we aren't fighting anymore or maybe he is just having a nice peaceful sleep. More times than not that though that, isn't the case.

Finnick has nightmares a lot because of the terrible things that happened in the arena; being forced to kill multiple people at fourteen. He also has a recurring dream of his parent dying over and over again. When this happens I feel sorry for him but at the same time it's nice to see that I'm not the only person who has nightmares. I wonder what would happen if all the victors got together to have a slumber party. I wonder how many of us would wake up screaming. I'm thinking the majority. I wonder if the people from One and Two even have nightmares.

If I had Finnick with me it wouldn't be as bad because he makes me feel safe. He makes me feel warm. He makes me feel at peace. He makes me feel loved.

I stare at Finnick sleeping until he wakes up. Even though Finnick and I were fighting for the last few days I know that I'm lucky to have him.  
Fighting with Finnick will always be worth it because I know eventually I will make up with him because I love him and because I know he is worth fighting for.

"Good morning Annie." He says and kisses my cheek.

"Morning. I should probably go home. I don't want my Mom to worry."

He nods his head and kisses me.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"No really I do."

"Go back to sleep Finnick." I say. Finnick says he has never been drunk but, when he wakes up without enough sleep he seems it.

He nods.

"I'll see you later." I say and kiss his cheek.

"Okay." He says and I get up and leave.

I walk down the stairs carefully. I don't want to wake up Marci or Jason even though I had no problem barging in at 3:30 in the morning.

"Hello Annie." I jump at the sound of Jason's voice.

"Jason you're up early."

"Light sleeper." He smiles "Can I consider this your walk of shame."

"Excuse me?"

"Well you come here late at night and don't leave until early morning you try and sneak out." He raises his eyebrows.

I roll my eyes.

"No."

"I knew the answer already. This may be a Capitol house but the walls are thin. If you need help analyzing Finnick's obsession for you I think I may be able to help you there." He smiles.

"What makes you say that?"

"Annie please when I'm with him 85% of the time he's talking about you."

"So when he's with you and Marci-

"No just me. Marci talks to Finnick about normal things. She asks about you sometimes. She likes you Annie."

"I figured that one out myself." I pause "I'm probably going to ask you something I shouldn't."

"Bring it on Cresta." He smiles." If that's true I won't answer it."

Sure enough, Finnick and him are cut from the same cloth.

"What's the deal with your Uncle?"

"Michael? Why don't you just ask Finnick about this?"

I bob my head back and forth.

"I feel like he is bias."

"And I'm not?"

"Michael seems to have a personal vendetta against just him."

"You know the stuff about him and our Mom right?"

"Yes."

"All of it? Or just the watered down version?"

"All of it what do you mean?"

"If you have to ask you don't know the full story."

"Finnick just told me your parents weren't married. I heard your Uncle call him a mistake. He blames Finnick for your parents death and he thinks so little of his sister that he basically called her a whore."

"That's probably about-

"Oh and he locked your grandmother up so he could take care of you."

"Okay that's about 15% of the story."

"What's the rest then?"

He looks up the stairs.

"I'll talk to you about this later."

"But-

"Annie trust me Finnick hasn't heard the full story either." He says. I look at him confused.

"I'll come by your house later today alright?"

I nod and then leave. I wonder what he means by Finnick doesn't know the whole story either. It's his life shouldn't he know about it?


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter 47**

I hear a knock on my door and when I open it I see Jason.

"Come in." I motion.

He does.

"You can sit anywhere." I say and he heads to the living area. "Now what exactly did you mean Finnick doesn't know the whole story."

"Some of the memories are too traumatic so he doesn't remember."

"You mean like Marci and your parents."

"Sort of Marci is starting to figure out our parents are dead though."

"That's good."

"I think so too."

"But what happened to Finnick?"

"Let me just start from the beginning."

"Okay."

"Now Michael makes it seem that him and my Mother were best friends or something but that was further from the truth. They weren't close or anything and he always despised her. According to our Grandmother she thinks it is because she was more successful than he was. Anyways when he found out our mother got pregnant unmarried he lost his shit Annie, like really bad. Gran wouldn't tell us the full story but I think he might have beat of our Dad-

"That's terrible."

"You're going to be saying that more, believe me."

I swallow hard if this is just the beginning I don't think I want to know the rest.

"Anyways after that he stopped talking to her for awhile. I think Gran said it was around the time Finnick was born when he came back and said he was sorry but, he also said he couldn't believe that she did something so irresponsible.

"He thought that would be the right way to get back into your mother's life." I say baffled.

"Apparently."

"That didn't work did it?"

"Not really Gran said he came by almost every day and she got tired of fighting with him so she just let him come over. She never let him touch Finnick though or so I'm told but, remember that part Annie it's important."

I nod.

"Anyway after he weaseled his way back into her life he kept giving his opinion on things."

"What type of things?"

"Her life he didn't want her marry my father he said she shouldn't have any more kids."

"Why."

He shrugs.

"No idea."

"Well it didn't work." I smile.

"You're telling me." He smirks.

"Anyways after I was born she saw how nice he was to me so she let him be around more. Except it was appaerent that he didn't like Finnick still."

"Why?"

"Why he doesn't like Finnick I don't know. How I know his because he would never call Finnick by his name."

"Then what did he call him?" I have a feeling I know. I hope he just didn't call Finnick a mistake for his childhood life.

"Mostly mistake or bastard."

"Your mother just-

"He didn't do it when our parents were in the room. Of course being a young child you become curious and Finnick asked our parents what that word meant. They told him they weren't married but they didn't love him any less. I think they told off Michael because we didn't see him for a few months."

"You're Uncle is worse than I thought."

"Keep listening Annie."

"I can't imagine anything worse than that." I say.

"Well, I'm about to disappoint you." He says. "Michael came back every few weeks but our parents were on edge when he was there."

"Why didn't they send him away?"

"I don't know maybe they thought that was worse. He got better by the time Marci was born. I think he just got over all of it or so he made everyone believe. Really he was just waiting for the right time.

"What do you mean?"

I was around seven making Finnick nine."

"I can do that math and Marci was three."

"She was actually two because she didn't have her birthday yet." He smiles and I roll my eyes

"Anyways our parents had to go to some required event that I think was enforced by the Capitol. They didn't want to leave us alone because we weren't that old. Our grandparents were busy and most of their friends had to go to this event so they left us with Michael."

"What did he do to you?"

"Nothing… to me. Our parents had been gone for probably an hour and we had just finished dinner. Finnick and I would always help our parents clean up so Finnick and I went to the kitchen to help. Michael said we didn't really need help but because Finnick insisted he let him."

Jason pauses

"What? What did he do to Finnick?"

"I was told to leave the room and check on Marci, she was sleeping and only a toddler. I did and she was crying I think she needed her diaper changed or something. I went back downstairs to tell Michael this. When I walked down the stairs I could hear Finnick crying out in pain. I got closer to the kitchen and remember he was telling Finnick he was disgusting waste of space, mistake, and that he shouldn't be here."

"That's terrible."

"No this next part is remember I said he was yelping out in pain.-

"Please tell him your Uncle wasn't.

"He was hitting him Annie really hard to. His face was all red the next day it was all bruised too. My mind couldn't really comphred what was going on I just say him hitting Finnick repeadtly. I'll never forget the look on Finnick's face when I was in the door way. It was sheer terror except he had a shred of hope when I was seeing what was going on.

"Michael stopped hitting him when I came over. I ran over to Finnick to make sure he was alright. I remember shouting at Michael "Why are you doing this?" He said "Because he deserves it." Michael then picked up one of the butter knives from the sink and dragged it trough Finnick forearm so it started to bleed. Then he got up and left. Finnick was screaming and crying. The blood was getting everywhere and Marci was crying too. I had no idea what to do so I just sat there with Finnick. Mostly in shock I was only seven.

"Our parents didn't come home for two more hours. They took Finnick to the hospital because the cut was too deep and he needed stitches. I didn't go, my mother went with him and my father stayed with us. According to Gran if the cut would have been an inch to the left it would've ruptured a main artery and Finnick would've been dead within a minute. Finnick needed fourteen stitches on his arm.

"The next day Michael came to the house I don't know what for but, as soon as he was there Gran took is outside to play but really it was to make sure we didn't hear what they were saying. I couldn't really make anything but, I do remember my father yelling "You could've killed him." Then my mother said "Could've he almost did kill him." Michael respond "With so what I would be doing society a favor." They said some other things and then he stormed out. Gran made sure to hold onto Finnick tightly. After that happened my mother ran over to Finnick picked him up and started crying. She didn't let go of Finnick for probably a week. She kept looking at him like he was the best thing in the world and that she was lucky or something. I think it was because he was still alive.

Jason looks at me.

"Finnick doesn't remember this at all or any of the abuse that Michael gave to him which Michael soon picked up on after our parents died. He liked getting away with it too."

"Why didn't you tell him?"

"He already has enough bad memories to deal with, he doesn't need anymore."

I nod

"Anyways after that day we didn't see Michael until we found out our parents died. Michael came to Finnick's house in Victors Village. I don't know how he knew that Finnick said no to the deal or he just thought it was his fault, but he came trough the door called Finnick a bastard son like he did when he was younger and then he punched Finnick. He wasn't expecting it so he fell to the floor. Michael got the upper hand and kept hitting him until his face was all bloody. Michael had to be forcefully pulled off of him. I truly believe if it was just them in the house he would've beaten Finnick to death."

I clear my throat not knowing what to say.

"How exactly did he get your grandmother locked up?"

"I don't know the answer to that one."

"Why did he get custody then?"

"He was the only other family member that was alive. Finnick didn't know that Michael was appointed guardian because he was in the Capitol. He sill though Gran was taking care of us. When he came back he didn't see us in his house and thought we were killed or something. He asked Mags where we were and she told him what happened. Michael wouldn't let us see him, but of course we figured out a way so we could still see each other. Michael finally just gave in when Marci kept crying and saying she wanted to see Finnick and now we pretty much caught up to present day."

"That's why you stay there with Marci because you don't want to leave her alone with him."

"Exactly Finnick and I always make sure she isn't alone with him in case something happens to her."

"Marci is so innocent too."

He nods.

"I don't think he would hurt her, but still I wouldn't want to risk it knowing what he did to Finnick."

"If Finnick doesn't remember-

"He did beat him after he dies and still verbally abuses him. He used to try and not do it in front of Marci but he doesn't give a shit anymore."

All I can mutter is

"Holy shit."

"I didn't know you said things like that Annie."

"I don't unless it is something like this I mean fuck Jason."

"I know."

"I feel guilty."

He smiles.

"Why?"

"Before I knew Finnick I hated him because I thought he hated his family but holy shit."

He wraps his arm around me.

"Annie don't feel guilty you didn't know him and I'm pretty sure most of Panem thinks he doesn't care about anyone except himself."

I guess. I hear my front door open.

"Annie." She walks into the living room. "What the hell is this?" She ask smiling.

"Jason and I are having an affair you caught us." I smile and and Jason stands up and walks towards her.

She rolls her eyes and sits down.

"So what are we talking about?"

"Nothing really." I say.

"Are you helping her make up with Finnick?"

"No they made up all by themselves."

"Really." Lana smiles.

Jason leans in whispers something in here ear.

"Spent the night you say." She raises her eyebrows "Slept in the same bed you say." She smirks.

I roll my eyes.

"Are you too finished here?" She asks.

"I think so." I say.

"You want to leave?" She asks him.

"Didn't you come here to see Annie."

"Well, I was going to be here because she was fighting with Finnick but, because that got all starighted out I don't think she needs me. Do you?"

"Leave." I say and roll my eyes.

"Okay I'll see you later then and we can talk all about what happened last night."

"Nothing."

"Well, I still want to know." She smiles and her and Jason leave hand in hand.

I sigh and slump back in my chair. I can't believe Finnick's life. It is so tragic, I think it is better that he doesn't remember but, it isn't right that his Uncle is getting away from it.

I sit in my house for a while just thinking about everything Jason has told me, my mind still can't wrap around it. I think I just need to go see him. I'm not going to tell him but, I want to see him anyways.

I walk over to Finnick's house and knock on the door and Marci opens it.

"Annie!" She shouts with glee.

"Hi Marci." I say.

"Come in." She grabs my hand forcefully and drags me into the kitchen. "Finnick look who I found." She smiles.

"Annie was at the front door then." He says.

"No duh." She smiles. Finnick rolls his eyes.

"What are you doing?" I ask as I see cooking supplies everywhere.

"Making cupcakes." Marci said.

"She insisted." Finnick says and I can tell this wasn't his idea but, he would do it for Marci besides you get cupcakes.

"And you're just in time Annie." Marci smiles.

"Why is that?" I ask.

"It's time to decorate them."

"Actually they have to cook a few more minutes Marci, then cool and-

"Shh Finnick." She says.

And I have to stop myself from laughing.

"Yeah Finnick shh." I mock.

He cocks his head, squints, and smiles.

"We made all different kinds of frosting."

"They're actually just different colors Marci."

"Whatever." She says.

I look and see the colors. They have pink, purple, green, blue, white, brown, red, yellow, and orange.

"What's your favoirte color Marci?" I ask.

"I like blue but, also pink."

I nod.

"And yours Annie?"

"Light purple." I smile.

"What's Finnick's Marci?" I ask. I don't know but, I want to see what she will say.

"He says green but, not just any green." She looks at him and smiles.

"What type of green?" I ask her.

"The green that our mothers eyes were. They look like Finnick's but, are brighter."

I notice she is using past tense and not present tense. Jason did say she was starting to realize her parents were dead.

"I see."

"Let me show you." She says and leaves the room.

"She's using past tense." I say to Finnick.

"Well, I think she is finally accepting what happened." Finnick tells me and I just think of Michael beating on me as a kid.

"What's wrong?" He asks me.

"Nothing, why?"

"You were just giving me a strange look."

I shrug.

"Mind must have been drifting." I say and Marci comes back holding something.

"See."

She hands it to me and I realize it is a photo of Finnick's parents. His Grandmother was right Finnick looks just like his mother. Very beautiful, she has that bronze blonde hair that went to her collar bone and framed her face perfectly, and the tan skin that most of District Four possesses. I can see what Marci means by the eyes, they do look like Finnick's but are fuller and brighter maybe it is because they hold wisdom. Finnick's father looks just like Jason he's handsome and has the same brown hair and blue eyes. No wonder they both have such good genes both of their parents were just as beautiful. Marci looks like both of her parents.

"I see what you mean Marci." I say.

She nods.

"She was pretty. Do you think I will be as pretty as her Finnick?"

"Of course you will be Marci, you already are." He says and kisses her forehead. The timer dings and Finnick takes the cupcakes out.

"Time to decorate." Marci says again.

"Not quite they have to cool so the icing doesn't melt off."

She sighs.

"I have to go talk with Mags for a second, can you stay with her for a second?"

"Of course." I say.

"Marci I'll right back don't burn the house down." He says.

"Don't worry I won't." She smiles.

Marci picks up a cook book and we head to the living room. She reads it and starts marking all of the things she wants to make.

We both jump when the door opens. I expected Finnick but, it's not, it's Michael.

"Time to leave Marci." He say.

"I thought I was staying here another night Uncle Michael."

He pauses.

"Oh that's right." He says "Well it looks like he is taking care of you. Is he here?"

"No he had to leave for a minute to talk to Mags. He left me with Annie though."

"I see." He looks at me "Tell Finnick I came by."

"You can bet I will."

His Uncle starts to walk out but, I want to talk to him.

"Marci do you think you'll be alright alone for minute."

"Of course but, where are you going?"

"I want to talk to your Uncle for a second."

"Okay." She nods and goes back to reading the cook book.

I go outside and see him walking out of the village.

"Hey!"

He stops and turns around.

"Something wrong Annie?"

"You bet there's something wrong."

"Does it have to do with Marci?"

"No it has to do with you, you disgusting excuse of human."

"I don't know why you're so mad Annie."

"You sicken me how can you live yourself knowing what you did to someone you see almost every day."

"You mean Finnick, I didn't know you cared so much that I called him a mistake. Which he is, don't be fooled."

"That's not what I meant."

He studies me.

"I don't know what Jason told you, but he was young your memories get distorted-

"Not about that they don't. When you see your brother getting beaten that becomes burned into your brain."

"Annie-

"I don't care what you say how can you do that to a child or to a sixteen year old."

"I'm doing what needs to be done."

"And what is that to kill him."

"Well I was hoping the arena would take care of that, but it didn't. I can't get rid of him now because Marci loves him too much. Besides, I think that would upset our beloved president."

"You are just like him."

"Finnick, please-

"No President Snow.

"Annie-

"You hurt people when it is unnecessary and you control them. You're a puppet master. You're a despicable human being."

"As I said memories become distorted."

"I take it back you're worse than Snow because he knows and admits what he is doing is evil, but you try and deny it and blame everyone else."

He grabs my arm hard and my vision starts to go blurry. I close my eyes and when I open them everything is in technicolor and intense. I can feel something else on my arm and the grasp of Michael is now gone.

"So bright." I say and close my eyes and when I open them this time I'm nowhere it's just white and gray. There is also fog on the ground.  
I look down and see I am wearing gray also. I see a long tunnel and decide to follow it.

"Annie." An eerie whisper says. I move faster to try and get away from it. I see the end of the tunnel and run out but almost fall off a cliff. Something or someone has grabbed me but I don't see it.

I look around and see I am in a mountainous abyss and it is still a blah gray color.

"Annie." I hear voice a say again.

"Annnnnie." The voice says and this time it is a loud cry.

I keep hearing my name until it is a yell and sounds almost like a beast. I sit down and rock back and forth trying to get rid of the noise. I become less aware of my surroundings. Until I feel something drip on my hand. I open my eyes and look on my hand and see blood.

I look up and see it is raining. I put my hand out to feel the water but when I pull my hand back I see blood.

"It's blood!" I shout.

I get up to run but I feel something grip my arm that isn't there. I push whatever it is off. I start to run to get away from the blood and to escape whatever was grabbing me.

I'm running so quickly that I trip and fall over myself and fall into a pond. I don't like water since I left the arena but when I come up for a breath. I notice it is thick I look around and see it is blood.

I scream and get out of the water but too fast because I hit my head and then everything goes black.


	48. Chapter 48

**Chapter 48**

My body jerks and I open my eyes and realize I'm in my room. My hair is wet and I'm in my pajamas. I don't remember how I got here, all I remember is falling into a blood lake. But that couldn't have been real or could it?

I sit up but soon regret it because I am dizzy. I lay back down and try to backtrack my memories to see if that will help try to figure out what actually happened. I start to think but, my mind turns into a mess and I put my hands over my face hoping not to cry.

I hear my bedroom door crack open and take my hands off my face. The light streams in and then the door opens all the way and I can see it is my mom.

She walks over to the bed and sits down and stokes my hair. I sit up and leave against the headboard

"How do you feel Annie?" She asks.

"I don't know." I say truthfully.

"Annie it's alright." She kisses my forehead. "You're safe here."

"I know, I just don't know." I say and feel like I'm going to cry."

"Oh honey. It's alright."

"What happened to me?"

"You fell down and hit your head."

"I know but, before that the bloody rain, the mountainous abyss, that eerie noise saying my name."

"Annie that wasn't real." She says gently

I look out the window and see it is raining. The blood rain must have just been regular rain, but wherever my mind took made me think it was blood.

"So I didn't fall into a blood pond?"

"No, I was told it was the pond near the exit of Victors Village."

"What else were you told?"

"Not much just that you were seeing things that weren't there. Which is fine Annie." She reassures me even though I know it's not. "Someone could answer your questions though."

"Finnick wasn't there." I mutter. The only person who was there was his uncle who grabbed my arm forcefully and I'm pretty sure he was going to hit me.

"Yes he was Annie." She moves hair out of my face.

"Well he's not here-

"Oh no." She smiles and motions towards the chair on the far side of the room. I see Finnick sleeping. I look to the clock it's only four in the afternoon Finnick must've been watching me sleep last night. Which he has done on other occasions. I could tell when I went over to his house earlier that he was a little off.

"How long have I been out?"

"A couple if hours. He's been here the whole time."

"And he's sleeping." I say and roll my eyes.

"Well normally I would assume it was nightmares keeping him up at night, but this times I don't think it is the case." She smiles.

"What do you mean?"

"I think he had a pretty girl distracting him." She smiles.

"You knew I was gone."

"Oh yes Annie. You may think seven thirty in the morning is early but I leave at eight to open the shop."

"How did you know I was there?"

"I saw the note on your bedside table and figured that is where you were."

"I see." I say.

She looks at Finnick then back at me.

"You know Annie you're eighteen now and-

"Mom please don't continue that sentence or even that thought."

"I'm just saying-

"Mom no."

She sighs.

"I'm just saying you leave and spend all night at his house and-

"Why does everyone thing I did something with Finnick while I was over there?"

"Well it isn't that hard to assume."

"Why because it's Finnick Odair." I say.

"No because you're young and in love and at this point in your life you-

"Mom okay I get the gist I don't need to talk to you about this."

"Just let me say something."

I sigh

"You've already said something."

"Just please be safe because-

"Ugh mom."

"I meant for your heart. Finnick goes to the Capitol a lot and I don't want you to get your heart broken because-

"I'm not going to get my heart broken."

"Annie you may say that now but I just don't want you to get confused. I know you love him and always will but this is an… interesting situation. Please just think about it and take it into consideration."

"Alright." I mutter. I never thought my mother would be giving me the sex talk, let alone with the guy in the room. Finnick could be awake and just pretending to be sleeping. I can feel my face turning red just at the thought.

"Now I will never bring this up again, alright?" She says

"Fine by me." I say.

"Unless you want to-

"I don't think so." I say.

"Alright because-

"Mom no." I say.

She pushes a strand behind my ear.

"Do you want something to eat?"

"Can you get me some water?" I ask mostly because I want her to leave the room.

I look over at Finnick to make sure he is still asleep. I'm ninety eight percent sure he is.

I pick up one of my pillows and throw it at him and he jumps awake. He has that terrified look in his eyes. _Good he was asleep._I think to myself.

He soon realizes where he is.

"Annie." he says and walks over towards me

"Finnick what exactly happened?" I asked.

"You were talking to Michael for some reason and he grabbed your arm hard. He didn't hurt you did he?"

"Not that I remember I just remember him grabbing my arm."

Finnick nods.

"Good. Why were you talking to him?"

"What happened to me?" I ask again avoiding the question. Finnick looks at me strangely, but moves on.

"After that I took his arm off of you and you said everything was very bright. You were blinking a lot and closed your eyes then you started running when I said your name to try and help you."

"You were the beast." I whisper.

"What?"

"You're voice sounded so evil... almost demotic."

Finnick puts his hand on my cheek.

"It wasn't real Annie."

"I know but it was so scary." I whisper.

He hugs me.

"It's okay Annie." He says and strokes my hair and I wince. My hand goes to my head and l can a feel a bump.

"That's probably from when you fell down and hit your head. It's okay you don't have a serious injury."

I nod. I don't know why he would know that, but I'm not going to ask.

"What happened after I ran away?"

"You sat down and rocked back and forth and started crying. When that was happening it started to rain. When it got on you screamed and said it was blood. You then got up and started to run out of Victors Village, you tripped over your feet and fell into the pound. Then you screamed it's blood and got out quickly and tripped on a rock. And can I just point out that, that is the second time you have fallen in that pond." He smiles.

But I don't smile back

"Too soon?"

"Little bit."

"Sorry." He smiles and gets off the bed.

"Hopefully this can make up for it." He smiles and pulls out some tupperware and opens it.

"Marci wanted to give you cupcakes to make you feel better." He says.

I smile and notice all of them have purple frosting.

"All purple." I say.

"It is your favorite color it isn't light but she said it should be good enough." He smiles.

"Anything would have been good enough."

"They taste really good too."

"Um isn't that conceded because you made them?"

"I was just the supervisor Marci did most of the work."

"Really?" I laugh slightly.

"Yes, why?"

"Because she didn't seem to know they had to cool first."

"I said _most_ of the work." He smiles.

I roll my eyes.

"I should be going Annie. I have to see Marci."

I nod.

"Tell her thanks for the cupcakes." I say and kiss him.

"Of course, I'll probably come by tomorrow." He says

"I hope so." He smiles and leaves

A few minutes later my mother comes back with my water and I gulp it down.

"You feel better Annie?"

"A little." I say. She nods.

"Cupcakes?" She says.

"His sister made them and wanted to give me some to make me feel better."

"That was nice and they are all purple. I'm assuming his isn't a coincidence?" She smiles

"No." I say.

I pick one up and take a bite Finnick was right it does taste good.

"If you can eat a cupcake Annie Cresta you can eat something more substancel." She says. She gives dinner and I eat it slowly. I then go to sleep and have a dreamless sleep. I'm hoping I never leave reality again, but I know that will not happen. My mind might wonder for the rest of my life.


	49. Chapter 49

**Chapter 49.**

Finnick is spending the day with Marci and Jason. They are going fishing or something. Finnick asked if I wanted to go, but I said no. Mostly because of the water but for something else as well.

After talking with Jason I figured I wanted to hear more so, I decided I would go and see Pearl -Finnick's Grandmother- apparently she tells Finnick she wants to see me all the time. Anyone can visit her she approves it and I'm sure she will let me. I want to ask her more about Michael and his involvement in the years with her grandchildren. I also what to ask her if I should tell Finnick what he doesn't remember.

I also just want to talk to her. She is very animated and was nice when I first met her.

I walk down to the nursing home where she is at and head to the front desk.

"Can we help you miss?" A nurse asks.

"I came to visit Pearl Hammond."

"You're not a family member are you?" The woman asks.

"Well no."

"That's what I thought Finnick and Jason come by everyday and their sweet thing of a sister comes by with one of them usually twice a week. That is all the visitors she usually has."

"Oh well I was told that if you asked her-

"Yes if she says yes, you can go and see her. Who should I say is asking sweetie?"

"Annie Cresta." I say.

She nods.

"Hold on just a second."

She leaves and I rock back on my heels.

I hear the door open and it is the nurse and Pearl. Pearl looks just as I remember her. Same shoulder length dress that is blonde but has more gray in it those and green eyes that I think everyone on Finnick's moms side has

"Oh Miss Annie it is you." She smiles. "I thought they were lying so I had to see it with my own eyes." She looks at the nurse who is holding onto her arm.

"Please I can walk over to there by myself, Kara let go of me."

I smile. She reminds me of Finnick in a way.

"You're alright if she visits with you Mrs. Hammond?" The nurse asks smiling. I get the feeling most of the people in here aren't like Pearl.

"Of course I am, this is the love of my grandsons life." She smiles "The hard part is going to get you to leave." She smiles.

"Alright." Pearl takes my hand

"Woah woah not so fast Mrs. Hammond, Annie needs to sign in first."

"Oh right that."

Pearl rolls her eyes.

I sign my name in.

"There's not a time limit is there?" I ask.

"Not for Mrs. Hammond." The nurse says.

"I know all the right people Annie." Pearl smiles.

"Now let me show you where I live." She smiles and takes me back to her room which is nothing to shout about it is just a small bedroom.

"It's not anything to shout at they like us to keep active and leave the room." She rolls her eyes again. I can tell she doesn't like this.

I nod.

"I'm the youngest broad in here." She says proudly. "But we know who to thank for that. The food is also terrible here Annie so I'm not going to offer you anything. I hope that is alright."

"That's fine."

"Good that's why when Finnick or Jason or Marci come by they give me good food. Marci and Jason came by the other day and gave me cupcakes."

"I got some too Marci made them."

"That's what she told me, but I didn't think it was true."

"Well Finnick said he supervised but I think it was more than that."

"That is what I figured." She smiles "And what is the pleasure of this visit? I have been trying to get Finnick to bring you here so I could see you're darling face again, but he always says you are busy."

"He's never asked me about this."

"That is what I thought maybe he thinks I will be embarrassing him." She smiles. "But that is what grandparents are for Annie." She says.

"I guess that is true."

"I've been told that Finnick finally got the courage to tell you he was in love with you since our last encounter."

"Well technically I said it first."

"Well that's not how he painted the picture. I'm starting to see why he didn't want you to come here because he lies." She smiles.

"Maybe." I smile.

She gets close to me and looks at me.

"You're so beautiful Annie, inside and out."

I blush.

"Thank you."

"Finnick should be so lucky to have an angel like you by his side."

"I think I'm the one who should be lucky to have him on my side."

"You're both lucky except the circumstances of you meeting, but that part doesn't matter." She smiles.

"That's true."

"I assume this isn't just a social visit, you have an agenda?"

"Well…"

"What is it?"

"It has to do with Michael."

"Oh him." She says disgusted.

"I'm sorry you don't have to talk about-

"I will answer your question I like telling people how awful he is sometimes. I always win the worst son contest in here." She smiles but I can tell she is disappointed in him.

"Jason told me some things about the past and Finnick…

"You referring to that knife incident?"

"Yes and the name calling."

"Oh well he still does that, but Finnick understands what it means now when he calls him a bastard. Felicity was so angry when Finnick asked her what that word meant. She didn't even have to ask where he heard it from, but she did anyways. His reply was 'Uncle Michael always calls me that what does it mean Mommy?' She was so disgusted with Michael. She always was, even as children. Thhat part in the brain that is supposed to tell you what is right and wrong is turned off in Michael's. Felicity always felt so angry at him for the way he treated Finnick, but she also felt guilty."

"Why would she feel guiltily?"

"Because Finnick didn't do anything wrong. He is an innocent child. She always wanted him to hurt her not Finnick I think that made it worse though because Michael knew she didn't like it. That should've been rather obvious going around calling your child a mistake or a bastard would of course make you angry but when he started hit Finnick things were different."

"Jason made it seem like that was the only time-

"Jason was too young to remember it happening before or he wasn't in the room."

"Why did his parents just let him."

"Oh they never let him do it. He waited for the right opportunities. They had to leave the room sometimes. That's when he did it, but that was only when it first started happening after it happened more than once they never let Finnick be alone while Michael was in the house.

"The thing I never understood was that we knew what he was doing when we heard Finnick screaming upstairs."

"Did he ever hit Jason or Marci?"

"No he treats them like they gold and treats Finnick likes yesterday's trash. After Marci was born he stopped trying to hit Finnick but I think he was just waiting for the right opportunity again, which was when he cut Finnick in the arm. Also killed him.

"He's always treated Marci and Jason better. It's always been that way. I don't think he would ever lay a hand on Jason or Marci. I don't think Michael cares about Jason at all. He would never hurt Marci though I think it is because she is so innocent."

"Michael still hurts Finnick though verbally though."

"Finnick knows he can't stop that however it does bother him." She shakes her head. "Michael has called him a mistake for his whole life. I think because of this he sometimes believes it. Michael knows this too which is why he still does it. I also think Finnick might envy Jason sometimes because they are so close in age. He treats Jason with respect and Michael just does awful things to Finnick. If his parents where still alive Annie." She pauses maybe trying to find the right words." It would not be like this. It isn't supposed to be like this. Felicity protected Finnick for most of his life. After that knife innocent he always tried to see him again but he never got close enough."

"Pearl."

"Yes Annie."

"Do you think… I mean he seemed to suggest that… he wanted to kill Finnick, do you think that is true?"

She pauses and doesn't answer for a while. I'm about to say you don't have to answer but she starts talking.

"Yes. I do. Jason doesn't know everything. There's a reason why Felicity never let Michail touch Finnick up until he was a toddler. There's a reason why he beat on him so much the main goal was to kill him. He wanted to fix the mistake and the only way he thought he could do that was…" She trails off. "I wish one of his parents didn't die. Then Michael wouldn't be able to hurt Finnick as much. I wonder if President Snow really knew what he was doing or if he just got lucky.

"I worry about Finnick so much Annie. He was depressed for probably a year after his parents died for many many reasons. They were dead and he couldn't really see Marci or Jason. Michael would lay into Finnick hard very very hard. I don't think he touched him but the things he said to him were just awful Annie. It was worse because Finnick was in such a fragile state. Which makes me believe he tried to kill himself because he stayed in the hospital for a three day hold. Which is required if someone tries to kill themselves, I think he was on suicide watch.

"I wasn't there so I don't know. He wouldn't tell me why he was in the hospital, I don't think he has told anyone ever. The only reason I know he was there was because one of the nurses told me. I wasn't allowed to leave yet because of these idiotic rules, but when he came to visit me after being in the hospital he seemed far away and not like himself. He was very quite and couldn't seem to focus. It was terrible.

"After being on suicide watch you're not supposed to be alone. He never was though because Mags ,his mentor, stayed with him after he came back from his first Capitol visit. She would take care of him make sure he was alright. She was doing the things I should have been doing. She visited me one day and is such a kind woman. I just wish I could be there for Finnick, especially then." I can tell Pearl's eyes are filling with tears and I don't blame her. Mags can take care of Finnick just fine and I know Pearl is grateful for that but, it must hurt knowing that someone else is doing the job that you were supposed to.

I nod.

"Do you think Finnick should know I mean, do you think I should tell him?"

She shakes her head.

"I don't think so. He will probably remember one day. but I don't want that day to be today. He has enough bad memories from the Hunger Games. I just want to let him think he had a fairly normal childhood, but if you to tell him I won't be able to stop you."

"I'm not going to tell him I just wanted to hear your opinion." I say.

"Good. If I'm honest with you Annie I'm surprised Finnick isn't more cynical or angry, but he's not, he's sweet and strangely optimistic. I think it might have to do with him not remembering the bad things Michael did to him. He thinks he had a nice easy childhood. I think it is really because both of his parents were that way. They raised their children right because not one of them is rotten to the core unlike Michael."

"I don't think that is your fault Pearl."

"I know Annie, I just wish I didn't have to call him my son." She smiles and the clock chimes.

"I think Finnick might be back from that fishing trip. Why don't you go and see him." She smiles.

"Okay."

"It was nice to see you Annie and you can come by any time Annie."

"Alright I will probably see you again then." I say and smile.

"I hope so." She smiles and I walk out the room. I sign out and walk home.

I see Finnick in town and walk towards him and hug him not saying anything.

Finnick's body stiffens and then he wraps his arms around me.

"Is everything alright?" He asks.

"Yes, I just wanted to hug you." I whisper.

"Okay." He says and rubs my back.

I do just want to hug him mostly after hearing about his past. I feel like I'm comforting him, but I don think I should tell him I know. If Finnick wants to tell me how depressed he was after his parents died he will. I'm not going to make him do anything. I love him too much and I think if I would presses him for information it would just hurt him.

"I love you." He whispers.

"I love you too, more than you know."

He looks at me and I think I can see confusion in his eyes, but he doesn't question it. He kisses me and everything stops for a minute.

**A/N: Thank you for reading! I just wanted to say that the updates probably won't be daily anymore. I just got caught up while writing this arch it was just so interesting I felt like I couldn't stop until it was finished lol. This caused me to neglect my other stories though so it might be a few weeks before I update again. I need to show my other stories some love lol. As always thank you for reading and reviewing!**

**-Susan**


	50. Chapter 50

**A/N: Oh. Mah. Gawd. Fifty chapters thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I'm glad you are enjoying it!**

**Chapter 50**

Today is the day Johanna Mason will be here for her Victory Tour. I'm curious to know what she is actually like because she wasn't the weak girl everyone thought she was. At her recaps she seemed hard hitting and to the point. I'm actually nervous about meeting her.

We have to go to the Justice Building soon to get ready. I hear a knock on my door and open it to see Finnick and he is wearing stuff from the Capitol.

"I should put on my Capitol stuff then." I say.

"That's a very nice greeting Annie."

I roll my eyes.

"Yes though you have to wear Capitol attire probably something from your Victory Tour." He says.

After the Victory Tour you get to keep some of your outfits. The ones I got to keep I generally liked but seeing those dresses is also haunting. I'm just glad I didn't keep the one from the Capitol. The dresses I don't get, get put up for auction and that dress went for a lot.

"Where did you get those clothes?" I ask. He was fourteen when he went on his Victory Tour I doubt that is what they are from.

"They are… gifts." He smiles.

"I see." I say.

I take his hand and drag him to my bedroom and place him on the bed.

"I didn't know you were so forward Annie." He smiles

I roll my eyes.

"You're the only other person here so you get to tell me what dress looks best on me."

"Uh Annie I don't really know anything about-

"Finnick, you can tell if something looks bad or not."

"But I don't want to insult you."

"I won't get insulated. I didn't make the dress. Besides, I rather you tell me now than have the whole country see it."

He rolls his eyes

"Okay but don't take too long we are supposed to be there in an hour."

I roll my eyes

"I have four dresses it won't take an hour."

"Okay." He smirks.

I take the four dresses from my closet which are from District Four, Nine, Eleven, and Two.

I think you always get to keep your District outfit.

I start with that one. It is a muted teal color that has thin straps and is a little shorter in the front than the back. It is very flowey, I remember Yule said it was it represent the waves of the beach. I'm not going to wear the silver heels because they are very uncomfortable.

This dress bring out my blue eyes and the necklace Finnick gave me.

I step out and Finnick smiles.

"That one is very nice you don't need to try on the others." He smiles.

"Can you at least try to be interested in this." I say.

"Annie you look beautiful in that dress and I'm sure you will in all the others." He says and I sigh.

"I want to try all of them on. I'm a girl it's what I do."

He sighs and falls back on my bed.

"Wake me when it's over." He teases.

I bounce on the bed next to him.

"Finnick you could at least pretend doesn't Marci ever ask you these things."

He scoffs

"No."

"Well please try and do this there's only three more."

He rolls his eyes.

"You do know I will probably say you look beautiful in all of them right?"

"Well at least I get to hear you call me beautiful." I smile and kiss him and get up.

Next is the dress from Two which is a steal black that has cap sleeves and a sweetheart neckline. It sparkles when the light hits it.

I walk out and Finnick says.

"Not that one."

"Why what's wrong with it?"

"That was the dress from Two." He says.

"So?"

"Exactly you don't remember." He says

"What did I do?"

"Just don't wear that one." He says.

"Okay jeez." I say and go to the bathroom.

I try on the one from Nine this one was a nice green color that had tan heels to represent the wheat and grass. This one is long sleeves though and the Victory Tour was later this year so there's no snow on the ground.

I walk out and we both shake our head.

The last one is from Eleven and I liked this one the best. It has nice sandals and the pink dress with a floral background. It is a strapless sweetheart dress line and it goes to my knees. I did trip and fall down so there are bruises on my knees but I don't really care.

I walk out to show Finnick.

"So?" I ask.

"I can tell you like this one the most." He smiles.

"That's not the point Finnick. Do you think I look nice?"

"You look as beautiful as ever Annie." He smiles and I sit next to him and kiss him.

"So this is the one yes?" He asks and sounds too eager.

I roll my eyes

"Yes."

"Good let's go." He holds out his hand and I take it. We walk down to the Justice Building.

"Hey uh Finnick?" I ask.

"Hey uh Annie." He smiles.

"What are we going to be doing?"

"Meet Johanna, listen to her speech, then the dinner celebration." He says.

"Okay."

"It's not that bad."

"I know but Johanna seems… intense."

"Don't worry I'm sure she isn't that bad." He kisses my forehead and smiles.

We get to the train station and wait for the train to roll in. I start to see people exiting the train; the makeup crew, the stylist, the escort, the mentor, and then Johanna.

Johanna is dressed in a baby blue dress that has crystals on it. She is wearing silver heels and a sliver headband in her hair. She may look all innocent but her face tells a different story. It is full of disgust, annoyance, and boredom.

Johanna and her escort start walking over here.

"These are the victors from Four Johanna Mags, Luna,

"Finnick Odair. I know who you are." She looks at him but, her face isn't filled with disgust it's something else. Her face is holding a smile and her expression has soften.

Does she like Finnick? I think to myself.

"The other one is-

"Yeah yeah the crying girl." She says unamused. I'm not insulted because it is true I cried almost the whole time I was in the arena and it is better than crazy.

Her escort sighs and walks off.

She circles around Finnick like he is pray.

"It's true what they say you are very attractive and more so in person." She says.

"Thank you." He says unamused.

"Someone is arrogant." She smiles.

"What?" He says confused.

"I never said it as a complement Finnick." She says with a smile. "I said it as an observation you just took it as a complement, which means you are arrogant. That does sound like the obvious answer, but the way you replied makes me think you get that attention all the time. That would explain the deadpan voice." She smiles again. "However I also sense annoyance maybe there is something I am not aware of or it could be because you get that response all the time. I get the feeling though there is something people don't know about the great Finnick Odair." She smiles

Finnick's jaw drops.

"Finally one that is worthy of the title of victor." Luna says with a smile and walks off. Then Johanna turns to me.

"You're Annie right, that's your name."

"Yes." I say and she walks around me.

"Fascinating." She smiles.

"What?"

"Well I think everyone in the country can say that after your Hunger Games you have been peculiar to say the least. But the way your body language is, it says that you are very sane. I think you are consumed with guilt which is why you have crying spells all the time." She says

"I-

"Johanna it's almost speech time!" The escort says.

"I can't wait to get to know all of you better." She smiles and walks off.

"What the hell." I say.

"She's annoyingly perceptive isn't she." The mentor from Seven says.

"Well at least she isn't a ruthless killer." Finnick says.

"Or like Cashmere." I mumble.

"She isn't like that Annie. She doesn't like that she killed all those people. That's why she apologized when she killed your female tribute."

"I forgot about that." Finnick says.

"I didn't. Her doing that made me see her as human." I say.

I listen to her speech and it's the same garbage they gave to me. Then we head into the Justice Building for her celebration dinner. Johanna sits next to Finnick even though as the new victor she is supposed to sit at the head of the table. I think she does actually like Finnick because of this I have to sit across from Finnick though.

"So Finnick youngest victor ever. How did you pull that off?" She smiles.

He studies her.

"Should I answer or will you just dissect my response again." He smiles that fake smile he does with woman in the Capitol. I think Johanna is just annoying him like those woman do

"No I was just curious." She laughs and touches his arm playfully.

"Well, you pulled the wool over everyone's eyes which is also impressive. How did you pull that off?" He asks with a smile.

She laughs again it is too over the top and it is pretty obvious. I think she wants Finnick to know this as well, she wants Finnick to know that she is _interested_.

"You know everyone asks that Finnick and I don't usually tell them but, for you well." She looks at him and has a suggestive smile. "I could make an exception."

"Really?" He says in the voice he does with the Capitol woman. I don't know if he is doing this for Johanna's benefit or not but, it is causing me to have a tight feeling in my chest.

"Yes but I can't tell you here, maybe somewhere else that is more... _private_."

I slam my hands on the table and get up and walk away. I start muttering to myself. I lean against one of the pillars and look at the view. It's nice to feel the air on a night like this. The air smells of the sea and you can feel the salt stick to your skin.

"Why did I feel the need to walk away from her." I whisper to myself. "I don't have anything against her." I look back at the table and can see her leaning against Finnick now and playfully pushing him. I can feel my face getting hot and I want nothing more than to go over and tell her to get off of Finnick but, that would seem too possessive. Besides it's not like she knows I'm in love with Finnick. If she was I don't think she would be doing it in front of me or at least not as obvious.

I turn back around and look at the sky until I hear the escort telling Johanna it's time to say her goodbyes.

"Goodbye Annie it was nice to meet you. I will be sure to see more of you at the 72nd Hunger Games." She smiles.

"Same to you." I say trying not to sound angry.

After they have left Finnick comes up to me and his smiling.

"What?" I ask.

"You were jealous." He says.

"Pssh of you and Johanna no that was." He smiles and raises his eyebrows "Alright I was jealous." I mutter.

"Why?" He asks.

"Because I think that she might-

"No Annie I meant why her?" He asks.

"What?"

"You don't seem jealous when I leave to see Capitol girls."

"That's different." I say.

"How so?" He asks confused.

"Because those people are paying for you and Johanna was doing it because she could. I think she actually liked you Finnick and not just because you are good looking."

He rolls his eyes.

"So what?

"I don't know." I say almost embarrassed.

"For what it's worth Johanna is way too intense and analytical for my taste but that doesn't really matter because I already have the best girl at my side."

I smile.

"You think so Finnick."

"No. I know." He smiles and kisses me.

"Let's go home." He says. I nod.

We walk back to Victors Village with our hands intertwined. Finnick stops when we are outside my house.

"I guess this is goodnight." He smiles.

"Goodnight Finnick." I say and we kiss.

Finnick then leans in and whispers in my ear.

"Don't worry Annie you are and will always be the girl for me." He says. I smile and wrap my arms around him.

"I love you." I whisper.

"I love you too." He says and kisses me.


	51. Chapter 51

**Chapter 51 **

I hear a knocking on my door and assume it is Finnick, I open the door and find him.

"Hello Miss Cresta how are you today?" He asks in a silly tone.

"Fine why are you being so formal?" I ask.

"Do you know what today is?"

"Tuesday?" I ask confused.

"No kind lady today is the starry night festival." He says.

"Oh right."

"This is my formal invitation." He smiles.

"I see." I say. "I've never gone to that festival-

"I know, do you want to go?" He asks me.

"I don't know Finnick." I say and look at the ground.

"Annie you don't have to, I just know you like the town events."

"I know, but don't you remember what happened at the flower festival."

"Annie that was fine."

At the flower festival this year when the petals started falling I started screaming for some reason and saw myself in the arena. I feel like the whole town was watching me.

"No it wasn't and it was worse because that's my favorite one." I say.

He touches my chin so I will look at him.

"It's okay Annie besides I had a back up plan anyways." He smiles

"What are you going to do?" I ask.

"You'll see. I will come by your house at 6:00 dress to impress Miss. Cresta." He says

"Don't I get more details than that?" I ask.

"That would ruin the surprise Cresta." He leans in and kisses me. "Remember dress to impress." He says as he walks to his house.

I roll my eyes and close the door.

"What are you up to Finnick Odair?" I smile and head upstairs

* * *

It's 5:57 and Finnick is supposed to show up in five minutes. I have been thinking all day what this back up plan might be and nothing comes to mind.

Because he insisted that I should dress to impress I put on my lavender sun dress. It isn't really that special but, I don't wear dresses very often besides I doubt Finnick will take this very seriously. I wonder what he will be wearing.

I hear a knock on the door and head downstairs. I open the door andI see Finnick and he looks nicer than usual. It isn't a suit or anything but it isn't shorts and a t-shirt either.

"You look nice Annie." He smiles.

"Well you said dress to impress."

"Well you did impress me but to be honest you could've wore anything to impress me." He smiles

"I see." I smile. "For what it's worth you look nice too."

"Good I tried. Now let's go."

He grabs my hand and starts dragging me somewhere.

"Okay now close you're eyes." Finnick says. I know where we are, we are near the pond in Victors Village. It is far away from all the houses in Victors Village it is isolated and nice.

"Close them Annie." He says and I do but he places his hand over them just in case.

We take a couple steps and I tumble a little. Then I think of something.

"Finnick if your back up plan was to push me in the pond I will be very mad." I say.

"Don't worry Annie that's not it but, maybe we could do that later." He says.

I roll my eyes even though he can't see.

"Alright watch your step." He says and I take his hand.

He adjusts my body.

"Okay. I think we're ready you can open your eyes now." Ge says and takes his hand off my eyes.

"Oh my god. How did you pull this off in a few hours?" I ask..

"Like I said I was a back up plan. I had some of it worked out already." He smiles.

Finnick has set up a table that is over looking the pond and it has a tablecloth and dinner on it with flowers as a center piece but that isn't what surprised me, it's the decorations. He put twinkle lights strands all over. Some are bigger than the others and they all resemble stars in the sky just like at the festival.

He takes my hand and brings me to the table and pulls out my chair for me.

"Such a gentlemen." I tease.

"I try." He smiles and sits across from me.

"Almost sunset if I didn't know any better I would say you planned this."

"Well I try Miss Cresta."

"It looks like the festival." I say.

"That was the goal Annie." I smile.

"Who you knew were such a romantic." I smile.

"I'm not really." He says.

I motion around.

"Finnick come on this is-

"I did it because I knew it would make you happy. I know you wanted to go to town events but you didn't feel comfortable enough to do so. I figured I could bring it to you." He says and I smile.

"I love you." I say.

"The feeling is mutual." He says.

"Now what is this?" I ask him about the food. Which is covered.

"Fish-

"I would've never guessed." I say with a smiles.

He rolls his eyes.

"You didn't let me finish because it is summer time and because I have made this for you before and I know you like. I made you." He lifts off the top from my plate "Grilled tequila lime fish tacos."

I smile. Finnick did make this for me before and I did really really like them.

"There's also salsa and some chips too."

"Okay how did you find the time to decorate all of this and make me dinner?"

"The dinner isn't that hard to make if you recall, and like I said the back up plan was already in motion." He says.

I smile.

"I still can't believe you did all of this."

"I am full of all kind of surprises."

"I believe you know." He tells me this all the time but, I never had any proof. This is proof enough.

"You know this festival is special this year. because there is actually going to be a meteor shower."

"Really." I say.

He nods.

"It's a pretty cool, don't you think?." He asks.

I smile.

"I guess." I say.

After the dinner Finnick and I move to the "viewing station" Finnick set up which is really just a blanket on the grass. I lean against him and hold his hand and watch the stars with him and for a second all the bad things seem to go away.


End file.
